Swansong
by chicagochi4183
Summary: My name is Isabella. On my 23rd birthday I found out that Tanya Denali, my mother, stole me from my biological parents as a baby. You've seen the movie, but this is my version. This is my Swansong.
1. Introduction

**A/N: This story is more intense/adult than my usual writing style. If you've read my HP fics and aren't sure how you'll feel about this, or you're new to me as an author, I encourage you to at least give it a try. **

**Edit: This isn't based on a real, existing film. The film aspect is a part of the story. **

**I don't own this world or these characters, just my plot. **

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If you're reading this, I know what you're expecting to read. You want the heartwarming story that they made a film out of. You want the beautiful actress Rosalie Hale and her best friend Jess Stanley falling in love with the dashing investigator Emmett McCarty as she finds her true parents in Aro Volturi and Charlotte Randall and escapes from Victoria James and Irina Laurent. Well sorry, but that's not what you're going to get. For one thing, I will never be as beautiful as Rosalie, though I think Edward kicks Emmett's ass any day. Jessica Stanley alright, but my Alice is a shorter, and nicer person by far. Victoria James doesn't capture the essence of Tanya at all, and while Charlotte's alright if Aro Volturi turned out to be my father my life would've gone very differently. No, my name is Isabella. Swan, Denali, the last name is negotiable. The point is, this story isn't a fairytale. It's real life. It's my life. If you want to keep reading it's up to you.

I know you want to jump right in on the day that my whole life began to unravel, because that's where the film starts and Rosalie Hale has beautiful weepy eyes of disbelief. But I'm telling this story, and so we're going to start off with my earliest memory of my mom. And yes, for right now, I mean Tanya Denali.

I remember I was about 3 or 4 years old, so this was 2 or 3 years after she and my aunt Jane took me. I remember sitting in a cart in a grocery store, and this woman comes up to me and my mom. She leans down over me and pinches my cheek, and I remember looking up to my mom in confusion.

"Your daughter is so beautiful." The woman said. My mom beamed like it was the nicest thing anyone had ever said to her. She picked me up right out of the cart, and held me close to her.

"Her name is Isabella." She told the woman. "But my sister and I call her Bella because she's so beautiful."

"Are you raising her all alone?" The woman asked. I remember this, because of the way the woman's face curled up in disgust. She took a step back, like she was afraid my mom and I were going to contaminate her. But my mom wasn't even phased. I remember looking up at her, at this bright smile she got on her face.

"Isabella is the best gift that God ever gave me. I knew it from the moment I saw her." The woman got all huffy and walked off, and to be honest I don't remember much after that. But I remember that moment because it was the first time I really understood how much my mother loved me. Holding me close like that, I could feel it in her voice and in her heart.

I know I'm not supposed to say that. Believe me, one unglamorous thing you won't see in the movie is how much therapy you go through when you find out that the mother who loved you for your whole life actually stole you from a group of perfectly sane, wonderful people who were also willing to love you but never got the chance. But it's true. It was an obsession, it was unhealthy, and I am finally able to admit that it was crazy. But my mother loved me more than anything else.

I remember a lot of other things in my childhood. I was always kind of a small kid, which makes perfect sense now. My mom was very protective of me. I remember any time something happened to me, whether I was sick or had a scrape, my mom brought me to see Aunt Jane. As a licensed nurse, Aunt Jane was more than qualified to take care of it. Besides, it wasn't too long before I gave up most physical things in exchange for being a huge nerd.

That's another thing they got wrong in the movie. You know that scene about that cute brunette little girl asking her pretty redhead mother why she doesn't look like her after soccer practice? If that had ever happened at all, if I had ever thought to ask my mom why I wasn't a pretty, fair-headed little girl like her or Aunt Jane, it was more likely to happen in a library. My mom pushed me to love reading and academics, and I did.

I could be cynical and say that it's because she didn't want me to get hurt and see a doctor, or anything that could get her found out, but that really doesn't make sense to me. From what I know about my mother, she wanted me to be beautiful and smart. Tanya Denali wanted me to have an amazing life. She always had time to help me with my homework, no matter what job she was working. She taught me how to do my make-up, how to curl my hair, and when I didn't have an interest in those things she taught me how unimportant they were.

I wish I had a more exciting backstory sometimes. On the days that I dislike her especially. Sometimes, when I'm getting breakfast with Charlie and Renee, or when Nessie and I are hanging out, I wish I could tell them that they did something better than my mom. That they understood me better than Tanya, or they let me be my own person, or they were less demanding. My relationship with Tanya was not perfect. But there was never a second in my life that I doubted that she wanted me to feel loved and cherished.

Growing up in a small town in Massachussets, I never had a reason to leave the state. We would go on vacation to Boston, and no matter how many times we'd done it before my mom always let me walk the freedom trail like a geeky tourist. We would go on duck tours, explore the art and science museums, or relax in the park. This is how I decided that I wanted to go to MIT, seeing all of the MIT students relaxing in the park, working on cool projects or riding bikes they'd made themselves.

With the same fervor, obsession probably, that she dedicated to all of my goals, Tanya made sure my dream would happen. Even when I realized that I wanted to do something more creative, she helped me be the best student that I could be. By the time I was a senior in high school, MIT was all but a guarantee. When I graduated High School, my mom helped me decorate my graduation cap with MIT or Bust in sparkling rhinestones. When I graduated from MIT with my Business degree, my mom was ecstatic. She was the proudest parent there by far.

I remember her just holding me and crying, telling me how proud she was of me. I knew that my mom had never gone to college – she never got the chance. My aunt Jane went back for her nursing degree, but my mom was content to work odd jobs and dream. When I graduated, she told everyone that it was like one of her lifelong dreams had been accomplished. I felt so loved that day, it almost hurt.

The only decision I ever made that Tanya didn't immediately support with her whole heart, was my decision to move from Massachusetts to Seattle for a job. I knew that my mom hated the West Coast. I thought it was because she hated the small religious town in Montana, where I was "born," and that she and Jane never wanted me to go back to. I convinced my mom and Aunt Jane that I would never even set foot in Montana, and when that wasn't good enough, I told them I wouldn't so much as leave Seattle without letting them know first. For obvious reasons my mom was terrified about me living so close to where I was actually born, but I didn't know that then. It was our first real fight, but when my mom realized that I had made up my mind, she let me go with her blessing.

In the interest of full honesty, my therapist has made it clear to me that this need to have control over my life and dictate my activities is not actually characteristic of love. On a rational level, I completely understand this. It is crazy, and as therapy has taught me, if I hadn't been conditioned for my whole life to see Tanya's obsessive control over all of my wants and actions as normal, I'd be able to see that. But the truth is, it feels like love. It feels like love that my mom cared enough to want to watch over all aspects of my life, and make each one as perfect as she possibly could.

Still, done was done. Unlike in the movie, once my mom realized that I had made up my mind about Seattle, she tried to be excited for me. She helped me in the roommate search, and was delighted when I found Alice and Angela looking for a third. She joked that Angela was my little guardian angel while I was so far away. She laughed at the jokes Alice told me over the internet and on the phone. She sent both of them care packages when we signed the lease, a month before I even moved. When I left, she didn't drive with me – letting my then-boyfriend Paul take care of that. However, she did give me armfuls of pictures of me and her to decorate my new room with, as well as enough food to last the first week. She told me to call her at the first sign of trouble, and reminded me to keep my nose clean and stay on the straight and narrow.

I knew I would forever be friends with Alice and Angela from the second I walked in the door. Back then Angela had just started her copy editor position at the newspaper, and Alice was working at the same PR firm as me, although she was branding and I was analytics. I loved my job almost instantly as well. For that first year or so Seattle was perfect. Seven months into us living together Alice met Jasper, who soon became a near-permanent fixture in our lives. Southern, charming, intelligent, and kind he swept Alice off of her feet, and it didn't take long for us to all know he was her one.

I'm not writing all of this to guilt or goad anyone, or to try and make people love Jane or Tanya. I believe that people deserve to know the truth about them, and the truth about me, more than a film can convey. What happened to me has touched a lot of people out there, who have been through various but still painful situations, and I want them to get a picture of the crazy variation of emotions that surround this all. I'm not perfect, nor Edward, Alice, Angela, Jasper, Tanya, Jane, my Swan parents, or Nessie. It's tempting to draw lines on who is good and who is bad, or who was right and who was wrong. But the truth is, everything is messy. Sometimes all of us were right, sometimes none of us were.

Life is difficult, we faced it, and now I have two loving parents, an amazing sister, my best friends, and a mom and aunt out there who gave me the best life they could give. This book is my chance to say what happened and make peace with it. Consider it the final chapter of this moment in my life – my Swansong.


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N:** Now it's time to really enter Bella's life. Please drop me a review!

I don't own these characters or this world, just my plot.

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It started out like any other day, except better because it was my birthday. That year, it felt like luck that my birthday was on a Friday. The year before, we went to dinner and then made cocktails in the den. But this time, Alice decided we were going to have the time of our lives.

At work, everyone was really nice. My amazing boss, Mary, bought me a little cake. Everyone in the office sang to me, wishing me the best. Then, two of my co-workers handed me twenty dollars from everyone for a free lunch out.

While I was at lunch, I called my mom.

"Happy Birthday, Darling!" My mom chorused, as soon as I picked up the phone. I could practically hear her excitement.

"You're not at work are you?" I checked. I often took my lunch break around my mom's work schedule so that I could call her.

"No, you have perfect timing. I just got of my shift at Victoria's, and I don't start at the Macy's until five."

"Oh, I forgot you'd moved to Victoria's! How do you like it? Is everything free?"

"Well no, everything isn't free. But let me put it this way, you and Mike are both going to really like your present this year."

"Mom!"

"What? Darling, I'm not that old."

"Oh my God, mom if this is going to turn into you telling me about your sex life –"

"Bella, I would never do that!" We both paused, and then she sighed.

"Okay, I wouldn't do that on your birthday." I laughed, and even she had to giggle.

"Anyways, that's not even what I was going to say, mom. Just, make sure you enjoy the perks of all the free things too, okay? You don't have to give me everything."

"Of course I do. You're my daughter. But, a lot of the other women who work here gave up some of their freebies for your gift, not just me. And I don't know where you get this idea that I don't have nice things, Bella. Just because I moved into an apartment."

"Okay, okay." I gave in. "Thanks, mom."

"No problem, darling. Anyways, you didn't call to hear about bras, and sex. You called because it's your birthday. I can't believe you're twenty-three!"

"I know! It feels so weird. There are no more milestones left in my life."

"Really, Bella? No more? What about getting married, having a baby?"

"Mom, those don't happen at a specific age!"

"You're right as usual, my little genius. How are you going to celebrate tonight? Do you and the girls have plans? Or, are you and Mike going to get cozy?"

"You know Alice would kill me if we didn't celebrate together. Mike has to work late all weekend, so he's going to take me out next Tuesday."

"Bella, I still can't believe you're dating a doctor. And a handsome doctor at that."

"Well, don't ring any wedding bells yet. We've kind of been fighting recently. I'm trying to respect his schedule but sometimes it feels like Mike doesn't want to see me, you know? He can also be pretty insensitive recently."

"Well then, darling, if he hurts you then you just let me deal with him. No doctor is going to disrespect you while I'm around." Both of us laughed at that one. I had no doubt that if I asked her to, my mom would fly to Seattle and beat the shit out of Mike. But I doubted it would be necessary. All couples went through rough patches.

"Anyways, Alice has this whole big thing planned. She and Jasper got us a VIP booth at some new club downtown. She got Jasper to agree to be sober too, so the rest of us can get crazy. And Alice and Ang told me I'm not buying any of my drinks tonight."

"Sounds fun. Before you go out, try to call me again? I work at the makeup counter till the mall closes at nine, which is only six for you. When were you planning on heading out?"

"Well, me, Alice, and Angela are doing dinner around eight, so I could call you then, but mom that's eleven. Are you sure you want to be up that late?"

"Bella, it's your birthday. Talking to you is more important."

"Alright. I'll talk to you then. I should get going, I need to actually eat this free lunch."

"Free?"

"Yeah, some coworkers split the cost of my lunch as a birthday gift."

"Oh! How sweet of them. Okay, I'm going to get you go enjoy your free lunch. But first. Happy birthday Bella. Every single year I've had with you has been absolutely incredible. I love you, more than anything in the world."

"I love you too, mom."

"Okay, bye darling.

"Bye, mom."

Once I got off the phone, I was free to enjoy my lunch. Mushroom ravioli was my absolute favorite meal. Though I'm not a vegetarian, I think it tastes better than any meat dish ever could. It tasted even better on my birthday, and because it was free. With the extra money left over, I stopped and got some donuts for the office.

I left work a little early that day, I suspect that Mary gave me lighter projects on purpose, but still Angela beat me home. She was in the den when I got back, and immediately she pulled me into a hug.

"Happy birthday!" Angela pulled back to smile at me.

"You look as young as ever." She winked, before flopping back onto the couch. She was playing some video game. Unlike Alice and me, Angela is super into video games. She can have hour long debates with people, mostly guys, about which consoles, games, controllers, etc. are better and why. Alice and I occasionally played the dancing game, but Angela had a little bookshelf in our den that was just full of all of her games – with a drawer for all of her different controllers and headsets and things.

"Are you winning?" I asked, watching over her shoulder. There was a lot of exploding going on, but that was about all I got.

"There's not really winning in this one, Bella. But I'm definitely not losing."

"Well, good then." I put my stuff away in our closet, and then joined Angela on the couch.

"Your book is in the kitchen, Alice moved it this morning while she was tidying." Angela didn't even take her eyes off the screen. I got up and grabbed it, moving back to the couch.

Every year since high school, I liked to re-read one of my favorites around my birthday. It was something one of my teachers did, and I always thought it was poetic. This year's choice was Gone With the Wind, which I'd started reading the day before. It was the favorite novel of my Aunt Jane and me, and I knew when I finished I'd have to call her and gush about it.

Alice didn't get home until an hour later, but the second she walked in the door she was a whirlwind of activity.

"How have neither of you started getting ready, it's after six!" Alice greeted us.

I should take the time to describe Alice and Angela. Angela is tall, just under six feet, and beautiful. Her mother is Puerto Rican, and her dad is French Canadian, so she looks like a model with light brown hair and dark, piercing eyes. She's also a total tomboy, to the degree that after living with her for nearly two years, I'd never once seen her in anything but pants. By contrast, Alice is exactly five feet tall. Her mother is an immigrant from Korea – not even five feet tall, and her dad is also pretty short at 5'5. She gets her blue eyes and her nose from her dad, but other than that she could be her mom's twin. It's funny to see her with Jasper, who's six foot two, but they just work together.

"Hello to you too, Alice." Angela called over her shoulder. Next thing I knew, I was wrapped up in a hug.

"Happy birthday, Bella!" Alice cheered. "Hi Ang," she added afterwards, arms still around my neck.

"Thanks Alice." I smiled.

"But seriously, you both should be in the shower. Well, not both of you. But one of you. Bella, you first!" Alice hauled me out of the chair, book forgotten as she led me to the bathroom. For someone so tiny, Alice has to be one of the strongest people I know. She does yoga near-religiously.

By the time I got out of the shower, Alice had already selected what I was going to wear, both to dinner and then out later. I got into my robe, another item courtesy of Alice, and immediately started in on makeup and hair. It's not really my thing, but Alice is absolutely obsessed with beauty.

"Alice, are you going to shower?" I called down the hallway. Alice came into my room, as I was brushing out my hair.

"I miss my hair." She sighed, running her fingers through her own, short locks. She'd gotten her hair caught in an earring when she slept in it by accident, and had to cut her hair to chin length. It suited her, but Alice loved her long, thick hair.

"But yeah, I am. I won't take as much time to get ready. You're going to wear what I picked, right?"

"Yeah, you know I love that blue dress. The red one is a little short, but I'm guessing you're going to tell me that's the point. I don't know why you want me to look so hot when Mike's not even coming."

"You can do better than that asshole, Bella." Alice said matter-of-factly.

"I agree!" Angela called from the bathroom. It was no secret that they disliked Mike. Alice thought that he belittled me, and Angela thought he was too smug, and they both thought that all of our fights were his fault. I chalked it up to them being good friends.

"Yeah, well, I'm not going to cheat on him on my birthday." I laughed them off. Alice shrugged.

"Suit yourself. I still think you deserve to see how many better guys there are who could be interested in you, even though you don't want any of them. Listen to me, Bella, you should listen to your elders.

"You're two years older, Alice. One year now. But I'll wear it. Thanks for giving me lower heels."

"You're going to be smashed tonight. I don't want you to fall over." Alice teased. I had nothing to say back. Heels and I don't mix, and never have.

After a quick call to my mother and my aunt Jane, we left the apartment at quarter to eight. We went to my favorite Thai restaurant, and as usual we ordered one of every appetizer on the menu for our dinner. It was an idea that was borne out of a late night and too much wine, but then it became a tradition. As soon as our order was put in, we immediately got to Angela.

"So, how was your date with mystery man?" I asked.

"Still hate blind dates?" Alice added. After us bothering her for months to let us try and set her up, Angela had let her boss set her up with his son.

"Well…" Angela paused and then picked up her glass. "I think I need a little wine in me before I can talk about this." She said, before downing it in one go.

"Well, I guess we're starting strong." Alice joked, and all of us burst out laughing.

"Okay, no, it was. I don't know. I was expecting him to be like his dad, you know? But Ben was, I don't know. He was a sweetheart. Really genuinely kind. I liked him."

"I sense a but." I cut in. Angela looked forlornly at her empty glass, and Alice and I exchanged a look.

"What is it?" Alice asked.

"He's only, like, five foot nine. I'm taller than him. And you know how much I hate that." She leaned back, sighing dramatically, before sitting back up.

"Okay, I know it's not like the worst thing in the world. He was really funny, and really smart. And I could tell he liked me, and he didn't care. But, I don't know. Anyways he asked me out again that night, and I said yes. So we'll see."

"One day when you guys have eleven little babies running around, I'll remind you of this conversation." Alice winked.

"Well, I don't want to talk about that. Let's talk about tonight!" Angela smiled.

"Our Baby Bell is finally twenty-three. You know what that means?" I must have given Angela a look, because she grinned at me.

"It means you're old enough for everyone in the world to feel like they can ask you when you plan to settle down and have kids. So enjoy that. It's why my boss set me up with Ben in the first place." Alice and Angela had a laugh at the shocked expression on my face, but after that our conversation slipped into more normal topics.

After dinner, we all went back to the apartment. As instructed, Angela and I changed into the outfits Alice had chosen for us. I had to admit, we all looked good. She put us all in jewel tones, and we took a lot of pictures.

Right on the clock, there was a knock on the door.

"Jazz!" Alice practically squealed. She jumped into his arms, and Jasper caught her easily. Then, he turned to me.

"Happy Birthday, Bella." He drawled. Jasper is from Alabama and went to college in Texas, so he's as Southern as it gets."

"Thanks, Jasper."

"Well, what are we waiting for? You ladies look absolutely beautiful." Jasper smiled.

"Hey Al, you have your keys, right?" Angela asked, as we all grabbed our purses.

"Yeah, plus Jasper has his spare. Is everyone ready?" I walked out.

"Yup, let's go do this!" The drive to the club went quickly, and as Jasper parked the rest of us waited out front. Because we had a table, we were able to go in as a group.

To be honest, I don't remember much of that night. I remember walking in, and the club was louder than I expected.

At one point, a tall guy with sandy blonde hair danced with me. His name was Robin, or Riley or something, and he was really handsy. I remember Alice and Angela making me do a shot every half hour because it was my birthday. At one point, the sandy hair guy bought a double round for all of us. But mostly, I just remember being incredibly drunk and incredibly happy.

Sometime around 2 AM, Jasper drove all of us back to our apartment. We practically tumbled out of his car, but when he offered to walk us back up, Alice kissed him and told him to get lost.

As he pulled away, we walked up to the front gate of our apartment, and then Alice said something I will never forget.

"Did I give one of you my purse?" Immediately, Angela and I looked at her like she was crazy.

"No, why would you do that?" "Of course not Alice!" She got really quiet then, and if Alice gets quiet you know something bad is happening.

"Alice, where is your purse?" Angela asked. Alice looked down the road.

"It's in Jasper's car." She said, in a really small voice. Immediately we all groaned.

"That's just great!" Angela said. Jasper lost one of his cousins when she tried to text while driving. Since then, he always turns his phone off when he's driving. We knew he'd have done it as soon as he left the club, and wouldn't turn his phone on again until he got home. Jasper lived about twenty minutes away from us, so even if he turned on his phone as soon as he got home we were looking at a forty minute wait.

"Neither of you brought your keys?" Alice asked.

"My purse is too small." I showed her the tiny bag she'd picked for me to bring. It only had enough room for me to jam my phone and some emergency money in.

"You said you had it." Angela shrugged. Alice frowned.

"Alice, it's really cold out." I admit, I was definitely the most intoxicated, and I was in no place to be helpful in any way. Alice leaned against the railing to our apartment, until she suddenly perked up.

"I know what we can do!" She cheered. Then, before Angela and I could stop her, Alice leaned over and pushed a random call button. She pushed it like twenty times.

"Hello! Are you awake? We're stuck outside. Let us in! Let us in!"

"Alice, what are you doing?" Angela asked.

"No, this is going to work. Bella, start yelling." I blame our intoxication for what happened next, because I'm not proud of this but I did in fact start yelling.

"Is anyone up? Let us in!" I started yelling.

"Guys, it's two in the morning." Angela frowned.

"Angela, we could freeze to death out here!" Alice complained. So, even Angela got on board. Again, none of us would normally ever do this. But there we were, screaming outside of our apartment building and harassing our neighbors. It actually shouldn't come as a shock that we were arrested.

The officer who came was very nice considering the circumstances. When he pulled up and got out, at first we thought he was there to help us in. But when he explained that we had to be brought in we all got really quiet.

"But, it's my birthday." I protested. The officer frowned.

"I'm sorry ladies, but three of your neighbors called us. You woke up someone's child. I have to take you in. But, you seem like real nice girls. I'm sure this won't even go on your record."

That was that. Birthday or no, we were charged with public intoxication and brought down to the jailhouse. As we walked in, it was nicer than I'd expected. I'd never been in a police building before, but it didn't seem like the worst.

"Okay ladies, now we have to fingerprint you and take a picture, okay? So everyone get out your IDs." The female cop in front of us was speaking to us like we were children, but to be fair we were still pretty drunk and acting like children.

"Who wants to go first?" She asked. Angela stepped forward.

"Don't you have real criminals to arrest?" She muttered. I think she meant to be quiet, but the woman heard her and huffed.

"Step forward please." As she took Angela's fingerprints, my drunk mind was just starting to comprehend that I was really being arrested. I frowned.

"Alice, we're in trouble." I said. Alice nodded.

"You go next, Bella." I looked up, as the woman was directing Angela where to go to take her mugshot.

"Alice, they post your mugshots on the internet. The whole world is going to know that I was brought in."

"Don't be silly, Bella." Alice nudged me forward.

"Okay sweetheart, what you're going to do is…" I kind of tuned her out, letting the woman direct me. I was too busy wondering if I could lose my job for being arrested. When the woman was done, she directed me back down the hall towards where she'd sent Angela. I walked in to stand with Angela, in line behind some other women. By the looks of them, they definitely weren't all in there for the same reason as the rest of us.

The line moved slowly forward, with Alice soon joining us. Right before it was Angela's turn to go, a cop walked in. Everything stopped as he walked forward and spoke to the person taking the photos, before walking over to our trio.

"Which one of you is Isabella Denali?" He asked. None of us spoke.

"Ladies, do I need to add interfering with a police investigation to your rap sheets?" He asked. I whimpered, but I put my hand in the air. He nodded back out the door.

"Come with me for a moment. We need to ask you some questions about some things." Immediately my eyes grew wide. I looked at Angela and Alice, who looked at me confused and helpless. Suddenly, it was all too much.

"Am I going to prison?" I asked. The officer must have heard something in my tone of voice, because he whirled around quickly like he'd be able to stop it. But it was too late. By the time he'd done a 180 the first tear had already fallen. Everything going on was too much for my drunk mind to handle. The officer sighed.

"Look, there's no need to cry. You're not in trouble really, we just have some questions." But as with all drunks, telling me not to cry only made me cry harder. I'm a really quiet crier – my face gets all scrunched up and I heave and whine quietly – so I'm sure to him it looked like I might have been having some sort of an episode.

Still, he did his job, shepherding me away from my normal, happy, ordinary life with my friends and into the room where my entire world was about to unravel.


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N: So today has not been my day, but that's nothing new for me right now sorry to say. yes, I clicked the wrong document by accident. Here is the true Chapter 2. It's going to be nice and slow on this story, but half the fun is in the waiting ;)**

**All of my love, but alas, none of my characters. The only thing I own is my plot! **

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I wish I could say that I kept my composure well that day. That I was calm and collected. I wish I could say that I looked just like Rosalie Hale, beautiful with soft brown ringlets and big doe eyes, and fat tears. But considering that I was drunk enough that one of the officers had to help me sit down, I think you can imagine that I wasn't.

They first officer brought me to a room where two other officers were seated. After helping me into the chair, the sole female officer looked me right in the eye and cleared her throat to get my attention. I was still silently crying, even though I had no idea what was going on. She opened her mouth to speak, but I cut her off.

"Where are my friends?" I whined. She reached out to pat me on the arm, and then seemed to think better of it and put her hand flat on the table.

"Will you please repeat your name for us? She asked. I stared at her.

"Is this on the record? I know my rights? I'm not going to prison." I said. She sighed.

"Nobody is trying to send you to prison. We just have to clear something up." She said. I nodded.

"My name is Isabella Denali. Here's my ID." I said. I handed her my library card. Then I handed her my old college ID. On the third try I finally got my actual ID and gave it to her. She looked it over for a long time before handing it to me, shining the light on it and bending it and everything.

"It's real." I said, confused. She stared at me.

"What is your date of birth?"

"March 16th, but I don't"

"Miss, uh, Miss Denali. What is your social security number?"

"123-45-6789" I gave her my actual social, of course. At this point I probably sounded like a little girl, I was more crying than speaking, crying silently.

"Have you given fingerprints before?" She asked. I shook my head.

"You've never left the country?"

"I'm not a terrorist!" I said, frowning.

"M'am. We're going to need you to calm down." One of the male police officers leaned in, clearly trying to be helpful.

"Don't tell me to calm down when you're trying to arrest me for terrorism!" I wailed, bringing on a new set of tears. The female cop looked at the guy then, exasperated, and whispered something to him. He left the room. She looked back at me then, looking a lot kinder.

"Miss Denali, I have some news to give you. There is no reason to believe that you are in trouble, but I will not lie to you either. Are you ready?" I was not ready. But, drunk as I was, I sat up straight and did my best to look her in the eyes.

"I'm ready." I lied.

"Alright. Have you ever heard of Isabella Swan?" I shook my head. She nodded.

"Isabella Swan is a little girl who was taken when she was only six months old. She was kidnapped right from home. And sweetheart, your fingerprints are a 92% match to hers in the registry." I was silent for a long time.

"Wait, so she might be related to me?" I asked. The officer sighed, shaking her head.

"We have reason to believe you might be her." She said. I blinked, tears still falling.

"So I'm not going to prison?" I asked. As I spoke, my stomach gave a terrible but unfortunately all too familiar lurch.

"Miss Denali do you understand what I just told you?"

"I think I'm going to throw up."

"I understand that this is troubling news –"

"No, I think I had one too many shots, I'm going to get sick!" I insisted. The male cop sprang into action, picking up a metal waste bin and handing it to me just in time for me to hurl into it. Then I realized that my friends weren't there to hold my hair back and I started crying again.

"Where are my friends?" I asked.

"They're in the other room. But Miss Denali, I think it's in everyone's best interests if we detain you tonight. This won't go on your record, but we can't in good faith let you go in the state you're in."

"We're getting arrested?"

"Not arrested, Miss Denali. Just detained. And your friends are going to be free to go with a warning."

"But you can't keep me and let my friends go!" I insisted. "I don't want to sleep with prostitutes."

"Miss Denali, you'll be in a separate cell. I know it won't be the most comfortable night, but you'll be alright." It was too late. I had already started crying again. The female cop sighed, and stood up.

"Come on ma'am." She said. Still crying I followed her. Down the hall I could hear Angela arguing with the cops, telling them they had to release me too. But her voice died out and a man's voice, probably Jasper I concluded, took over. I was shown to a small room that, except for the bars, looked more like an awful motel than what I'd pictured.

As she'd promised, nobody disturbed me the whole night. Drunk as I was, I slept like a rock. I woke up to the sound of the bars screeching open.

"Where am I?" I asked, as I sat up. It's probably no surprise that my headache was major. I squinted against the light coming into the room, covering my eyes. I didn't remember anything about where I was or why, but at the sight of a uniform I realized that I was in jail.

"What did I do?" I asked the officer who stood at the door. He just shook his head at me, but it looked like he was holding back a laugh so I figured I was okay. My mouth tasted like vomit and my whole body ached; I was instantly mortified.

"Let's go." He said. I followed him quietly, looking straight forward and hoping that my blush wasn't visible. I turn bright red whenever I'm embarrassed. Not a pretty, flushed red but a full on, get-this-girl-some-water, glowing red.

The officer brought me to a room, which I later learned was the same room as the night before, and sat me down.

"Miss Denali, do you remember what we told you yesterday?" He asked.

"Did you read me my rights?" I guessed. He looked like he was trying not to laugh again.

"You weren't under arrest, though you seemed very convinced yesterday." I knew for sure that my blush had to be visible by then.

"Look, whatever I said or did yesterday I apologize." I said.

"From what I hear, you weren't that bad. Just crying." My hands immediately went to my face. If Alice's waterproof mascara hadn't held up, I probably had black tear tracks from eyes to chin. I wondered if it would be weird to ask for a mirror.

"I don't remember that." I said, as quietly as possible.

"Let me bring in detective Rourke. I trust that you'll behave in here while I'm gone? Do I need to cuff you to the table?"

"I'll behave." I promised. As soon as he stepped out of the room, I groaned and lay my head on the table. My head was still killing me, I was sure I looked like a mess, my mouth tasted terrible, and I had no idea why I was there. Or, for that matter, where my friends were.

There was some sort of commotion down the hall, and then a tall woman walked in.

"Hi Isabella, I'm Detective Rourke. I'm going to make this very quick for you, because there's a group of women demanding your immediate release and, to be honest, you're not looking so great." I sat up after that last part.

"I'm sorry." I apologized for lack of anything else to say. She sat down across from me, holding a file.

"Isabella, last night when you were detained, we took your fingerprints. Now, legally, police keep a database of fingerprints from different crimes and crime scenes across the country. Are you aware of this?" I shook my head.

"Well, one of those databases is a missing persons database. Now, when we put your fingerprints into the database, they came up as a 92% match for a missing person's case from 19-. Is that the year you were born?" I nodded.

"Okay, well, a 92% match is actually quite a high match. High enough that we have to reopen the case, alright? For you, all this means is that you have to make an appointment to come back and talk to me in a week, alright?" I nodded.

"Isabella, I need verbal confirmation that you understand what I'm saying."

"No, I get it. I need to come talk to you in a week. I'll make the appointment. Please, can I please go home?" Detective Rourke smiled and nodded, before standing up. She opened the door, and walked me out to a desk. Alice and Angela stood there.

Angela was worried, clenching and unclenching her hands and shifting from foot to foot. Alice looked more guilty, wincing as soon as she saw me.

"Thank God!" Angela said, rushing forward to give me a hug. Alice joined in as well.

"I am so, so sorry Bella. Your mom is going to kill me. I got you arrested."

"Too loud." I said. "I just have to make an appointment before I go."

'Are they trying to make you go to AA? I can tell them you're not an alcoholic. This was all my fault." Alice said, thankfully in a much quieter voice. I shook my head.

"Something about some kind of fingerprint database." I said. Walking over to the desk, I made the appointment to meet with Detective Rourke and then finally Alice and Angela brought me back.

I slept for most of the rest of the day. That's not even an exaggeration. I went to sleep at around eleven, and I woke up at seven at night. Then, Alice and Angela filled me up with food and tried to ask me more about what happened. I didn't really have answers.

"All I know guys, is that my fingerprints are a match for some kind of police database so they made an appointment with me. It didn't sound like I was guilty of anything really. Oh God, I need to call my mom."

"Bella, what if you didn't?" Alice asked. "I don't want your mom to hate me." Angela and I both gave her a look, and she sighed.

"Okay, no, I know you need to call your mom." Alice sighed. I smiled at her.

"I won't tell her it was your idea." I acquiesced. She beamed at me.

"Hey, Bella, I really am sorry." She said.

"Don't be. Yesterday was a lot of fun! And yeah, my mom is going to be pissed, but I can't be her perfect daughter forever, right?"

"Please. You'll always be perfect to your mom. Watch, she's going to call the Seattle PD and give them a piece of her mind." Angela laughed. I picked up my phone, and walked into my bedroom. My heart was pounding; for all my bravado I was terrified to talk to her. Still, I hit her number and the phone started ringing.

"Don't tell me you were too hung over to call me until now!" My mom joked. I was quiet. Suddenly telling her about it felt like too much.

"Bella?" She asked. I sighed.

"I was definitely hung over…" I started.

"Did something happen? Did you cheat on Mike?"

"No! Never!" I said. Then she laughed.

"Well, whatever happened can't be as bad as that, right?"

"Just, promise me you won't hate me." I said.

"Bella, absolutely nothing that you could say, or do, would ever make me hate you." She insisted, tone suddenly serious.

"But you need to tell me what happened, Bella. We can't fix it if I don't know what's wrong." That helped calm me down. That's how it was with all of my problems. My mom was there by my side to help me fix them.

"Mom, last night we got a bit too drunk and too loud and someone called the cops on us. We weren't arrested, I promise, but we were brought in. And then something happened with my fingerprints, and now I have to talk to a detective next weekend."

My mom was silent. Throughout my life, my mom had never yelled at me, but in that moment I was sure it was coming. I was sure that she was going to tell me how irresponsible I'd been, and ho I had let her down. Then I heard a quiet, breathy noise and I realized that she was crying.

"Oh no, Mom. Oh no please don't cry. Please, please, please don't cry." This was much worse. I had broken my mother's heart, and I made her cry.

"Oh Bella." She sighed.

"I'm so, so, so sorry mom. Please don't cry."

"Bella I just, I love you so much. I love you so, so much. You know that, right? You know how much I love you?"

"I love you too mom. More than anyone. Please don't cry."

"I'm not, I'm not upset with you Bella. I promise. I just, I just really love you. But Bella, I love you no matter what. You know that, right? I love you absolutely, all of the time, no matter what."

"I know that mom. I know."

"Do you Bella? You believe me?"

"Of course I know that mom. Of course I believe it. You are a perfect mother. I love you too. So much. Of course I know you love me. You make me feel loved every day."

"Okay, good. That's all I need to know. I'm not mad at you sweetheart. I'm glad you called. I actually have some fun news. I uh, I didn't want to tell you on your birthday, but, well, I'm going on a vacation."

"What? Mom!"

"I love you. But this is something I'm doing for me. I'm going on vacation to Mexico. I just finalized all of the details. I wanted, I wish I could bring you with me, but you have your own life now. I need to accept that."

"Mom, we can go this summer. I'll have some vacation time."

"No, Darling, I need to go now. I need to get away. Just for a little while."

"Mom, how long is a little while."

"Just a few, two weeks. You know, I love being your mom. But I need to get away." I thought I understood what she was trying to say. Now, with hindsight, I know the truth. But in that moment, I thought I understood her perfectly.

"Mom, don't ever feel guilty for needing some time for you. Enjoy it. I hope you have an absolutely amazing time. And I can't wait to hear all about it."

"You are so selfless, darling. Such a beautiful, amazing daughter. I am so proud to be your mother."

"Mom."

"No, really Bella. And I promise, I'm not mad at you. Tell me the truth, did this have something to do with Alice?"

"Mom! Okay, yes, but I told her I wouldn't tell you so you need to pretend not to know."

"She'll never know that I know, Bella. I promise."

"Thanks, mom. I'll talk to you tomorrow, alright? Bye."

"Bye, Darling." When I hung up, the only thing I felt was relieved that she wasn't mad. I didn't think that what she said or how she said it was strange. In fact, I didn't suspect a thing. I told Alice and Angela that she wasn't mad, and to me that was the end of it.

But, as you all know, it was really just the beginning.


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N: I'm picking up steam with this one! It seems like my muse has finally come back, lol. In this chapter you get to meet someone I expect you'll have a lot of opinions about. Please let me know what you think of Mike, or the chapter in general, in the reviews. Read on! **

**Unfortunately, the only thing I own in this work is my plot. **

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By the time I went back to work, I had already put everything that happened at the police station out of my mind. Of course I remembered that I had to go back, but I chalked everything up to me being way too drunk and a fluke in the system.

When my coworkers asked me how my birthday was, it turned into a whole production. Because I was the youngest in my office, everyone teased me that I was a little goody two shoes. I didn't mind, it was more of a term of endearment than anything else. Still, I was excited to give them something that would challenge that reputation.

I waited until everyone was on their lunch break, and we were all gathered in the break room, before I began my story.

"You guys will never guess what happened to me on my birthday." I know I was trying and failing to hold back a smile. One of my coworkers rolled her eyes.

"Let me guess, you got too drunk and threw up for the first time in your life." She said it good-naturedly, and even I had to laugh at that one.

"Well, you're not too far off. I did throw up." I said, then I paused for dramatic effect. "In an interrogation room." The room went dead silent.

"Oh my God, were you robbed?" Someone asked. I shook my head.

"Bella, you weren't assaulted, were you?" Someone asked quietly. I shook my head in shock.

"Absolutely not. I would never joke around about that!" I said. Then I decided I had to drop the ball before people's theories got too crazy.

"I was arrested." I said. There was a split second of silence, and then everyone started laughing.

"That's hilarious Bella." "You had me for a second Bella." People were congratulating me on my joke that wasn't a joke. I shook my head.

"I'm serious." I said. "I spent the night of my birthday in jail." The laughter died down, and everyone exchanged nervous glances.

"I can't tell if she's serious." Someone whispered, but it was so loud in the silence of the room.

"What happened?" Someone finally asked. I launched into the story. Now that I knew that my mom didn't hate me, it was almost kind of hilarious. By the time I finished telling it, everyone was dying laughing.

"Our Baby Bell finally grew up!" People were literally applauding, and someone clapped me on the back.

"That sounds like some college-level crap Bella." Someone teased. I smiled, taking it all in. I didn't mind my coworkers laughing, whether it was with me or at me. I knew that it was pretty funny, and even though they were shocked, most of them also seemed vaguely impressed.

The rest of the workday, everyone got in little jabs at me, but it was all in good fun. By the time I left for the apartment, it all mostly died down. That night, we got to hear Alice talk about someone new that started working with her. The woman sounded like an absolute nightmare, apparently when she wasn't bragging about how over-qualified she was for her job she was making snitty remarks about other people's food, clothing, or work choices.

By the next day, everyone at work was basically over my new arrest record. I was old news, not that I really minded. With everything going back to normal, I basically felt back to normal. The more I thought about it, the less I remembered why I'd been so freaked out in the police station. After all, as they'd explained multiple times, I wasn't in danger of getting arrested.

That night, my boyfriend Mike finally had time to take me out for a birthday dinner. He told me to get dressed up, which Alice helped me with, and he picked me up promptly at six thirty.

"You look stunning, as usual Isabella." Mike was always smooth. It's almost a shame he didn't make it into the movie, because jerk or not he was certainly debonair. Back then, I absolutely melted when he spoke.

"Happy Birthday, love." He said, before leaning down to kiss me. At 6'5", Mike is also the tallest guy I ever dated. He looked like a model: well-coiffed blonde hair, piercing blue eyes, and a haughty smile.

"We're going French tonight." He smiled.

"Sounds amazing Michael." Mike hated being called Mike to his face. He preferred full names, always calling me Isabella. Mike led me down to his car with an arm around my shoulders "for my safety" which I thought was hilarious. He always thought that our apartment was unsafe, though back then I didn't blame him. Mike's apartment was beautiful, with a view of the needle and a doorman.

As Mike helped me into his car, I sighed. In that moment, I thought my life was perfect.

"Now, Isabella, what would you like to listen to? The news, or talk radio?" I forced a smile.

"Talk radio sounds lovely Michael."

"Have you spoken to your mother recently?"

"Of course, we spoke on my birthday. She sends her love."

"Your mother is so sweet." Mike was actually very fond of my mother. He used to tease me that it was a shame that I wasn't blonde like her.

By the time we got to the restaurant, I was beyond ready just to escape from the radio. But Mike never listened to anything else. He helped me out of the car before giving the keys to a valet, and then he walked us into the restaurant.

"Reservation for Newton?" He said at the podium. The woman at the podium beamed at him, her smile dimming when she noticed me. Mike held me tighter.

"Right this way, sir." The woman tried another smile, and I fought not to role my eyes. To Mike, dating a girl like me was practically slumming it. The idea of him even looking at a waitress was hilarious on principal alone. We were seated, and our waiter was a male, so I was more comfortable. Mike glared at the guy but he didn't say anything. He ordered us a bottle of champagne to start with.

"Isabella, I feel like it's been so long since I've seen you."

"I know, but you love your job."

"Not more than I love you." Mike smiled. I could feel my heart flutter. Mike was my first serious boyfriend, and when he said he loved me I felt so adult.

"I love you too." I smiled.

"Let's have a toast, to your birthday and to many more birthdays!" Mike raised his glass. I gently clinked mine against his – Mike hated anything that he saw as "too aggressive" – and then we each took a sip.

"So, how has work been?" I asked. Mike took off. When I said that Mike loved his job, I wasn't kidding. He spoke about what was going on at work all throughout the appetizer. As we waited for our dinner, which Mike had ordered in flawless French, he finally grabbed my hands and stopped talking.

"How was your birthday, love? That's why we're here. What did you get up to with Alice and Angela?" My smile dropped, though I was quick to recover. It may sound silly, but until that moment I forgot that I hadn't told Mike what happened.

I'm sure it will come as no surprise to you at this point that Mike is a very judgmental man. So there I was, trying to think about whether I should lie. I squeezed his hands.

"Well, it's really kind of a funny story." I began, trying to smile.

"Did you let Alice get you drunk?" Mike was frowning. I forced my smile to stay in place.

"Well, we went out to our place and had all of the appetizers."

"I thought you were trying to watch your weight, Isabella."

"Michael. Do you want to know what happened or not?"

"Proceed."

"So, we went to our place, and then we got dressed up to go out." I was interrupted by the waiter bringing our meal, and I had never been so relieved. Mike looked annoyed at the interruption, but I didn't mind.

I could tell Mike expected me to keep speaking, but I honestly couldn't bring myself to keep talking. I managed to constantly have a small bite of food in my mouth, timing it so that it was never polite for Mike to ask me to speak. Yes, it was petty and probably not a good sign for our relationship, but as I said Mike was the first man to love me.

The result of my diversion was that we didn't resume the birthday conversation until we were back in Mike's car.

"Isabella, you never told me about your birthday." He grabbed my hand over the center console, and I somehow fooled myself into believing that it would be okay.

"Oh, of course! Well, we all got dressed up to go out."

"You didn't wear anything I wouldn't approve of, did you?"

"Michael, you're not my dad." I fought the instinct to role my eyes at him.

"Isabella, I'm just looking out for you."

"Well no, I didn't. Anyways, we had a lot of fun. Jasper was with us the whole time, looking out for us. The music was great, we were dancing, it was a lot of fun."

"Why was that so difficult to tell me?" Mike laughed, squeezing my hand. It seemed my attempts to avoid the subject hadn't been as subtle as I'd thought.

"Well, we did run into a bit of trouble. Nothing major."

"Oh, did one of you get into a fight?" Mike laughed again.

"Well, no. Uh, Alice forgot her key in Jasper's car, and you know he has his phone off when he drives."

"You were trapped outside? Isabella, you could have called me. This is why I should have a key to your apartment." I let out the weirdest nervous laugh, causing Mike to squeeze my hand again.

"We don't have to talk about it now." Mike said. I frowned.

"No, it's not that. Uh, we had the terrible idea to try to get one of our neighbors to let us in. I think we were all too drunk. So long story short we got booked." I said the last part in a rush, hoping to avoid what I knew was coming. But I had no such luck.

"Isabella, please clarify. Because it sounds like you just said that you got arrested and didn't think to let me know until just now."

"I'm sorry Michael." I said.

"No, don't apologize. Isabella how could you be so irresponsible! I feel like I don't even know you right now! You got arrested?"

"It wasn't that bad Michael, it's not even on my record. They let us off with a warning."

"Not that bad? You want our children having that as a model of their future? Oh, it's okay to get too drunk and be a public nuisance because mom did it when she was supposed to be behaving like an adult!"

"Michael, I didn't exactly plan on –"

"No, you didn't exactly plan at all, did you? What was Angela thinking? I know Alice has no self control but normally Angela is reasonable!"

"Hey! This wasn't Alice's fault!"

"Oh, really? Who forgot their key? And be honest, whose idea was it to scream like drunk kids? I know it wasn't yours!"

"Yeah, well I participated Michael! And I would hope that if we had kids someday, you would never tell them something like this."

"What if they look up your arrest record? I wouldn't even have to tell them!"

"I told you it didn't go on my record! Something came up!"

"What kind of something? Do you have a past record?"

"No, something with my fingers, I don't know. Look, I knew you would be mad but you need to calm down, Michael!"

"Isabella, I am twenty-seven. I am looking to settle down and start a life soon. I love you. Do you understand that? Maybe this is my fault, and maybe you haven't outgrown your childish drinking and going wild days, but if that is the case I need to know now. I cannot start a family with a child."

"Don't call me a child!" I screamed.

"Stop acting like one!" He yelled back.

"I never should have told you." I sighed, looking out the window.

"You're not going to cry are you?" He said in a low voice. I glared at him.

"Michael, I would hope that if you were being enough of an ass to make me cry, that what you just said to me would not be your first instinct."

"Look, am I bringing you to your apartment or do you still want to come over?" If I was smart I would go back to my apartment, but the thought of Mike's queen size bed was too good to pass up.

"This is still my birthday." I muttered. Mike grabbed my hand, and kissed my fingers.

"That's my girl." He said, suddenly all smiles again. "We can never stay mad at each other for long. I still don't approve of what happened on your birthday, but now I think we're clearer on acceptable versus unacceptable behavior, yes? And it wasn't really your fault."

I opened my mouth to argue, but Mike clicked the radio back on, and then when we were at a red light he leaned over and kissed me and I forgot what I was angry about. That's how our relationship went. Mike kept me enthralled with this vague idea that we were going to get married one day in the future and have this beautiful family.

By the time I left Mike's the next morning for work, everything was great between us again. He had been much more attentive than he usually was, which I took as a sign that he felt guilty. Either way, I was in a great mood when I got to work.

The day was largely uneventful, though I did have a cool project to work on. When I got home, I tried to avoid telling Alice and Angela about my fight with Mike, but they sniffed it out easily. They were really angry, on Alice's behalf and on mine, so I was beyond relieved to see a call from my mother. I excused myself to my room to take it, letting them continue to cuss out Mike's name.

"Hi mom!" I smiled. I heard a sniffling sound on the other end.

"Mom, were you crying?" I asked, shocked. She gave a weak laugh.

"I've just been looking at your old things. I remember how tiny you were when I first held you. I can't believe you're an adult now."

"Wow mom, what has you so sentimental?" I asked. She laughed again.

"You're growing up! You're an adult. That's actually why I called. I wanted to let you know that I'm sending you another package. Your birthday present should be arriving any day now, but this one might take a bit longer."

"Oh God, Mom, you didn't get me more things did you?" I asked.

"Oh no, darling. These are things you should already have. Your birth certificate, social security card, some old baby pictures. It was silly of me to let you move to Seattle without them."

"Whoa, Mom. I'm not that old yet. You have such a good system for storing those things. Why can't you keep them?"

"Oh, it's time, my darling Bella. It's time."

"Mom, are you okay?" I asked. There was something off in her tone. Something I had never heard before.

"Bella, you know how much I love you, don't you?" She said.

"Mom, you're kind of scaring me. Is everything alright? Is someone harassing you? Cough once if you're in trouble." I said. That got a more genuine laugh.

"Bella, the only way I could ever be in trouble is if you doubted, even for a second, that I love you more than anything in the world."

"I know that mom. I love you too." I said. I could practically feel her smile on the other end.

"I know you do, darling. That's all I need in this life. You and Jane are my family, you know? God gave me the perfect sister and the perfect daughter." I smiled.

"Well you deserve perfection, mom."

"So do you, Isabella. Never forget it. I meant what I said, you know I like Michael for you but if he's not treating you right you let him go, okay? You don't need that in your life. You deserve better. You deserve love." I couldn't help but laugh.

"I know, Mom. You taught me that."

"Good! I love you Bella. I love you so much. I will always love you."

"I will always love you too mom. Are you sure nothing is going on?"

"Everything is great. I just love you." I opened my mouth to speak, but Angela burst into the room.

"We're done ragging on Mike, and our show is starting." She smiled.

"Hi Ms. Denali!" She yelled.

"Oh! Oh, I should probably let you go. Alright Bella. I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you. Hugs and kisses and my eternal love. Goodbye, darling."

"Uh, I love you too mom. Bye."

If I had known that was the last conversation I would have with my mother in months, I would have stayed on the phone all night. I would have let her tell me a thousand times that she loved me. I would have dragged out our goodbye. But I didn't know. Instead, I said goodbye to my mother and hung up the phone, moving on with my life and putting the strangeness of the phone call out of my mind.


	5. Chapter 4

**A/N: I've been in the zone recently, so maybe we can get back to a weekly schedule! Enjoy :D**

I don't own this world, just my plot.

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The morning of my appointment with the police I dressed up in my best law-abiding-citizen outfit, did my best hair and makeup, and tried to have a positive attitude. Though I still had no idea what was going on, I was sure that once it was all straightened out the whole debacle of my birthday would be firmly behind me.

I walked into the station twenty minutes early, and took a seat on a hard wooden chair. It gave me time to look around. I had never been in a police station before, and it was a lot less frightening that I had expected. It almost looked like an office, except that everyone was in a uniform. The longer I sat there, the more I convinced myself that I could handle whatever they threw at me.

This time, it was a male officer who escorted me to a room. Unlike before, this was an office. On his desk were pictures of his kids, a boy and a girl in their teens with very red hair and very wide smiles. It all felt so normal, that I relaxed a bit without even realizing it.

"How are you doing today?" He asked.

"I'm doing pretty well." I smiled. "I got to take work off for this." He laughed.

"Good, good, I'm glad."

"How are you?" I asked.

"Oh, I'm doing alright." I nodded, unsure what else to do. He leaned back in his chair to open a desk drawer, removing a manila folder and placing it on the desk.

"Miss Denali, I'm going to ask you a question. Do you prefer a slow reveal, or a band-aid approach?"

"Slow." I said immediately. I have always disliked shocks and surprises, and I still do to this day. I like to get accustomed to something and make up my mind about it. The officer nodded, opening a file.

"Twenty-three years ago a family from Pullman, Washington gave birth to their first child, a little girl. The father, Charles, was on the Whitman County police force and the mother, Renee, was a school teacher. When their daughter was six months old, she was kidnapped. Investigators studied any and all leads, but could never solve the case. But, because Charles was a police officer he had his daughter fingerprinted when she was two months old and kept a file of updated pictures of her. As you can understand, the family was very upset."

I nodded, unsure. Warning bells were going off in my head, but I could not figure out where this was going.

"Well, whenever someone submits fingerprints to a system, that information is stored in a database. Some databases, like the one your fingerprints from the other night went into, are only stored for a period of years. But other fingerprints, like missing persons' fingerprints, are stored forever." I nodded again to show that I understood.

"When fingerprints enter our system, they are automatically checked against other fingerprints from the databases. This lets us know if someone is wanted for past crimes, or if they have a history, anything like that. However, it is also checked against the missing persons database." When I didn't react, the officer sighed.

"When your fingerprints came in, they were a 92% match for the fingerprints registered to Charles and Renee Swan's missing daughter."

There was silence. The officer looked at me, and I looked at him, and I had no idea what to say. I know this is going to sound bizarre, but I was trying to figure out what that meant. My mind did not make the connection that I might be that missing child. It was literally inconceivable to me. I sat there blinking at him and wondering what was going on until I finally asked

"What does that mean?" I think he was alerted by the lack of fear or sadness in my voice, because the officer let out a deep, long sigh.

"I don't enjoy giving bad news, but in some cases it is part of my job." He paused, glancing at the picture of his kids.

"Miss Denali, what this means is that it seems very likely that you are the Swans missing baby daughter." I stared at him silently. Then, from somewhere deep inside me, I began to laugh.

"That is absolutely ridiculous." I said through my laughter. "That is literally impossible. I have a mother, and she is a nice, reasonable, sane woman." The officer sighed.

"Miss Denali, ridiculous as it may seem, fingerprint evidence is often a first step in many cases such as these."

"No, you're not listening to me. There's been a mistake somewhere. Maybe the information is old. I mean, it's from the nineties. Can you honestly tell me you trust information from the nineties?"

"There have been advancements, yes, but fingerprints have been used since the early twentieth century."

"Then something else went wrong! I'm sorry, I know you're just doing your job. But sir, I can almost guarantee that there is some sort of mistake. If you met my mother you would understand. She's harmless."

"You may be right Miss Denali. But this evidence is enough for us to at least consider re-opening this case. Do you want to know what the next steps are?" I shook my head.

"You're going to reopen a case for a 92% match? That could mean anything!"

"That is actually a very statistically significant match." I knew that. I knew that 92% accuracy in anything was a fairly good match, both in the business world and in the scientific world. But all I could fixate on was that 8%. The whole thing seemed so absolutely, undeniably false that all I could think about was that small chance."

"Miss Denali, would you like to hear the next steps?" I nodded, since I had a feeling he was only asking to be polite. He gave me a small smile.

"Well, what you can do for us today is take new fingerprints. We can run those through our system again. You never know, mistakes do happen." I nodded again. He was looking at me like he was afraid that I might explode any second, but it was the calmest I had felt in a long time. I knew that he was wrong; there was no other option to me.

"I know that this is a strange and difficult position to be in, and an uncomfortable situation for everyone involved. I appreciate you attempting to handle it in such a civil manner. However, I also feel it is my duty to tell you that you can feel free to let out any emotions that you might be feeling. Suppressing them is unhealthy. If you wish, I can leave the room and give you a moment at any point." I nodded again. I felt fine. I felt confident in his inaccuracy.

"Well, as long as you're feeling alright. The next step in our process is that we also must speak to your…" he trailed off, like he didn't know what to say.

"Mother, my mother." I said. He nodded.

"Yes, well we must speak to Mrs. Denali."

"Miss. My mother was in a cult marriage but it was never recognized." Okay, so maybe I did have a bit of a temper. But I really thought this whole situation was disrupting my life for no reason.

"Okay. Can you put us into contact with your mother?"

"Yes, but it might be a while until she responds, just so you know."

"Is your mother difficult to get in contact with normally?"

"No, not at all. She has always been there for me, you know, like any single mother. No, she's actually going on a vacation for the first time since she had me. To Mexico."

Never have I seen somebody go from in-control to in full panic so quickly. Once I said the word Mexico, within seconds he was speaking into his phone. I didn't even see him pick it up, or dial. He was speaking so quickly, I couldn't even grasp the conversation. But when he pressed the receiver into his chest and looked straight at me with a frown, I got a bad feeling for the first time all day.

"Did your mother announce this news before or after you told her about your involvement with the police?" He asked. I immediately shook my head.

"It wasn't like that. She's just going on a vacation." I said.

"Answer the question please."

"Technically after, but that's just because I called her first." He ignored me, picking up the phone and beginning his rapid dialogue with the person on the phone. I felt so guilty, as though I had somehow incriminated my mother. In that moment, I wished I had just kept my mouth shut. Even now, I wonder if everything would have happened quite the way it did if I hadn't felt the need to share that specific bit of information.

"When is your mother leaving?" I was so startled at being addressed that he had to ask once again before I could speak.

"I don't know." I said. He immediately relayed that information, and then his focus was back on me.

"Would you please call your mother for us now?" He asked. With shaking hands, I pulled out my phone. I knew that my mother would be at work, and I didn't want to disturb her. I was waiting to hear a ring, but instead a loud beep rang out in my ear.

"I'm sorry, but the number you are trying to call has been disconnected. " It was loud enough for the officer to hear, and he spoke into the phone

"Give me one second, I have to put you down." He hadn't stopped looking at me since I'd touched my phone.

"Miss Denali, am I correct in hearing that your mother has disconnected her phone?" My mind was going a mile a minute, and I had a response before he even finished the question.

"My mom likes to chase deals. When a phone company offers a lower rate as some sort of promotion, my mom switches over. She likes to change her phone number because she's convinced that they can tell she's jumping back and forth. She probably just found some sort of new deal. She'll text me from a new number in a day or two." The officer was still staring at me.

"I don't think you realize how serious this is. If your mother leaves the United States of America right now, that will be seen as her fleeing the crime scene."

"You asked me to call her, and I called. That was her number."

"Do you have another way of contacting her? Facebook? Email?"

"My mom is simple. We didn't even get a computer in the house until I was eleven, and we've had the same one since. She only used email really while I was in college. I can email her, but I doubt she'll check it until a few days, and by then she'll have sent me her new number anyways."

"What about social media?" I just stared at him, and he seemed to take the hint.

"Alright Miss Denali. You need to let us know as soon as your mother contacts you so that we can speak with her. I advise you to tell her that by no means should she leave the United States until this matter is resolved. Is this Massachusetts address correct?" I nodded.

"We'll see if there is evidence of her closing the property. Or does she move a lot too?" He didn't ask it in a mean tone, but the question still hurt. I believed that absolutely nothing was wrong with my mother, and having someone even think that she was a criminal was such a foreign, upsetting concept for me to wrap my head around. For the first time in the meeting, I felt that sadness that I knew he had expected. But I didn't think Tanya had done anything wrong. I thought that she was being unfairly judged.

"Do you have reason to believe that she has moved residences?" I shook my head. The officer sighed.

"I don't want to scare you. Trust me, I am rooting just as hard as you that this is a misunderstanding. But we need your mother here to help us straighten it out, alright?" I nodded.

"Alright. Well, that's all for our discussion. I'm going to call Officer Vaisey, I believe you met her the other night. She'll take you to be fingerprinted once more, and then you need to make another appointment with us, alright? I know this is difficult, but it is very important that you come back with your mother's new phone number so that we can clear this up once and for all, alright?" I nodded again.

He picked up the phone – I'd forgotten someone else was still on the line – and as he'd promised the female officer came back to bring me to fingerprinting. I had no idea what to say or what to do. The whole situation was so much more than what I had imagined, and I was honestly frightened of what may have been coming. All I knew was that my mother had to be innocent, someone had to have made a mistake, and that I needed my mom to get back to me soon and tell me that everything was going to be okay.


	6. Chapter 5

A/N at the end this time! I don't want to spoil anything for you!

I apologize for the delay. Yesterday got away from me, but I'm really trying to stick to my once-a-week schedule with this one.

The only thing I own here is my plot!

* * *

My birthday present from my mother had come the day before. When I got back to the apartment it was waiting unopened in my room. I had wanted to wait to call her as I opened it, but the need to be close to her won out.

I knew her, but even still I was shocked. Some of the things she had packed for me I wasn't even sure how to wear. But there were also simpler things. She gave me a few nice silk pajama sets, a few lace teddies, and a couple of new underwear sets as well. Most of it was blue, which is definitely my best color, but there was one fire engine red set that I knew Mike would love. So, I called him.

I knew Mike would be available because he had the day off. I got dressed up, and when he got there I surprised him with my birthday present. About an hour later, we wandered into the kitchen so that I could make us lunch.

"What brought that on?" Mike asked. He had pulled his jeans back on in case Alice or Angela got home early, but other than that he was still essentially naked. We were in a rare playful mood, but his question brought me right back down to Earth.

"Oh, come on Baby Bell, don't do that."

"Do what?"

"You can forget that I asked." He said. I shook my head.

"It's ridiculous, I don't even know why I'm worrying about it." I said. He shrugged.

"Just tell me."

"So I went down to the police station today and, I mean, they think my mom is, they think my mom abducted me."

I was prepared for a lot of reactions. I was prepared for silence, or shock, or disbelief, but mainly I was prepared for support. What I was not prepared for was for Mike to laugh. But he did, he burst out laughing, and said something I will never forget.

"Wait, so you're a milk carton kid?" I slapped him. That was his first clue that something was wrong. After I slapped him I stood there, staring at him in shock.

"Bella what the fuck!" He yelled.

"Get out." I said. His eyes narrowed.

"Well if you're going to be irrational about this."

"Why would you think it was okay to say something like that to me?" I demanded.

"You said it was ridiculous! You said that, not me."

"So that means it's funny? Michael, the police think that my mother kidnapped me. My mom. How would you feel if someone thought that about your mother?"

"Isabella be reasonable."

"Michael I'm serious."

"Isabella that would never happen to me. I would never get arrested." I stared at him in shock, eyes wide and mouth open.

"Wait, so you're saying this is my fault?"

"You made an irresponsible decision that I would never make, is what I'm saying."

"Well thanks. Nice to have your love and support Michael."

"Isabella, can you cut the theatrics and calm down?"

"Michael, you can't just tell me I'm being theatrical because I'm upset with you." I want to make something clear. I may have been upset but I wasn't yelling, I wasn't screaming. I was trying to have an adult conversation. But at me saying that, Mike stood up, looking down at me.

"Isabella I don't appreciate your tone. When you feel like you can calm down we can keep having the nice day we were having." I had an epiphany, standing there in my kitchen.

"You're not going to apologize." I said. Mike rolled his eyes.

"I'm sorry I offended you. It was an innocent comment." He said. I looked at him. He was a beautiful man, accomplished, strong mentally and physically, and almost a fairytale. But he could also be mean and belittling, and the more I thought about our conversations the more I realized he didn't understand me. In the time since this moment I have also realized that I was in a heightened emotional state, and this moment was also motivated by those emotions and a desire for control. But because of what happened later, or should I say who happened later, I will never regret this choice.

"Michael I can't see you anymore." I said. Mike stared at me like I was crazy, and I'm sure he thought I was.

"Isabella, you are being incredibly impulsive today and I think you're going to regret it."

"No Michael, I don't think I am. I can't do this anymore. I just can't." To his credit, Mike didn't put up too much of a fuss when he left. He picked up his stuff, I sent him off with a plate of what I cooked, and he told me that when I 'got over' whatever I was going through he would try not to be too angry. I knew it was impulsive, but in that moment I couldn't see myself ever regretting that choice.

That doesn't mean I wasn't a wreck by the time Angela got home. She found me sitting in front of the television watching the news, which I never watch. I had a giant plate of pasta, my third since I'd sat down, sitting in front of me. She knew instantly that something bad had happened.

"Did you go down to the station?" She asked, sliding in next to me.

"How was your day at work?" I asked.

"Don't deflect." Angela said, resting her head on my shoulder. I jostled her a bit as I put my pasta down.

"I broke up with Mike today." I said.

"You dumped him!" Angela bolted up, staring at me with wide eyes.

"You were right. We're not compatible." I said. Angela was still looking at me like I'd grown a second head.

"Uh, Bella what happened." Angela had her gentle voice, slow, calm, and soft. I was still staring straight ahead at the television.

I turned to look at her, and that's when I lost it. I started crying, bringing my head down to her shoulder this time.

"Oh, Bella." Angela sighed, patting me on the head.

"Did you and Mike fight?" I nodded my head into her shoulder.

"I know that you know that Alice and I aren't fond of him, but if you're regretting it I'm sure you can take it back." I cried harder.

"Bella, I mean it. I can call him right now." I leaned back, trying to stem my tears.

"I don't regret breaking up with Mike." I said. "That's not why I'm crying."

"Oh thank God." Angela said, eyes closing in relief, which brought on more tears.

"Is this about what happened at the station?" She asked, somehow even softer.

"If I tell you will you tell Alice?" I asked.

"That bad?" She asked. Both of us typically trade on who had to give bad news to Alice, because she doesn't handle it well. I nodded.

"Okay, I will tell Alice." She said. I took a deep breath, and tried to stem the flow of tears.

"At the station today they told me that they think my mother kidnapped me." I said it all in one rush, but my Angela understood me. She reached out and handed me my pasta.

"You've earned this." She said. "Geez, you should have called me or Alice. What possessed you to call Mike? What did he say?"

"He said that I was a milk carton kid."

"I'm going to kill him." Angela growled. "Bella I am so sorry. I am so, so sorry. Is that why you broke up with him? Don't answer that. I am so sorry."

"I just, I don't want to talk about it anymore. It's ridiculous and I don't want to talk about it." I said, trying to stop my tears.

"Let's talk about something else then." Angela said, shutting off the television.

"Want to teach me how to make shortbread brownies?" Angela asked.

"Sure, absolutely." I said. An hour later when Alice got home, she found us eating the brownies. She immediately dug in with us, not even questioning it.

"Hey Bella, how did – "

"Bella, did I tell you about last weekend with Ben?" Angela cut off Alice's question, and I sent her a grateful smile.

"Oh, spill! How was it? Where did you go? What happened?" Alice took the bait, beaming.

"Well, this time we went to go watch a play."

"Angela you hate theater." I laughed. She rolled her eyes.

"I do not hate theater." She said, but Alice and I just laughed

"You do too. Anyways, that's not the point. You can't stop smiling, so obviously it was good." Alice beamed.

"You two are ridiculous. To continue what I was saying, we went to go watch a play. But like thirty minutes in he could tell I was not as into it as I could be. So we ditched."

"You walked out of a play?" My eyes widened and I couldn't help my little gasp.

"Well, yeah. We did. It was incredible. We were in like the sixth row on the floor, and you know those were good seats. But he stood us up right after a fade to black and we just walked out. And then, in the lobby he looks at me and he's like 'theater isn't your thing huh' and I'm nervous. But he just leaned in and kissed me, just did it, and then we went to a movie instead. We went to a comedy film and then he took me to the most amazing place to get Mexican food. He didn't even know that I'm Puerto Rican."

I looked over at Angela, and her smile reached from ear to ear. It was infectious, and soon I was smiling just as hard as she was. Angela's eyes were shining, and I knew then that this was a big deal. This was really important to Angela, and this guy was really important to Angela.

"How was dinner?" Alice asked. Angela, if possible, lit up more.

"We went to this food truck, and I know you hate those Alice but I mean it when I say that the Mexican was to die for. I think I came when I ate that taco." We laughed, caught up in her infectious mood.

"You really like this guy." I smiled.

"Well, I have relationship news too." Alice smiled.

"Did you and Jasper go out?" I asked. Alice shook her head, giving me a look that told me it was time for me to stop talking. Alice hates it when you interrupt her.

"Jasper came over during my lunch break today and, well, okay I feel like I should preface this by saying that Meghan just got engaged. So all day I'm hearing her talk about her fiancée and her wedding plans. So I'm telling Jasper about this over lunch and I said 'but we would never have birds at our wedding.'"

Angela and I gasped. Jasper's family broke apart when he was very young, and his mother Maria is very bitter about it. Even though she likes Alice, she hated the idea of either Jasper or his sister Lucy getting married. The first time Alice ever mentioned marriage with Jasper, they got into a fight that almost broke them up.

"No, wait guys. He didn't say anything. He kind of froze up, but then he agreed with me. He said that he thought birds were tacky. And then we moved on."

"What do you think that means?" Angela asked. Alice smiled.

"I don't know. But, I have to believe that it's progress, right?"

"Alice, of course it is. Jasper loves you, we all know that. Don't worry about him." Angela smiled.

"I mean, I was talking to my mom the other day and my mom said that she knows he's going to propose. And for the first time, I can really see it. Maybe not today, not this year even, but I think he'll get there. It made my day."

"You're amazing Alice. Of course he's going to want to marry you. I know his stuff with his mom is, a lot. But he loves you so much that one day he's going to realize that you're not them. You're Jasper and Alice." I smiled.

"Any updates about Mike?" Alice asked. By the expression on her face, I know she just wanted to be polite. So, now in a very different state of mind, I was excited to give her something I knew would make her day.

"Mike and I broke up today Alice." I smiled.

"Shut up!" Alice screamed, slapping me so hard on the arm I thought it would leave a mark.

"Wait, the asshole didn't dump you did he? Because I know you think the sun shines out of his ass but you can do so much better than Mike." Alice said his name distastefully.

"No, I dumped him." I said.

"Why?" Alice asked. I shrugged.

"He called me a milk carton kid." I said. I knew we were in a somewhat dangerous territory, but I was feeling so much better from Angela and Alice's happiness that I kept it moving.

"What does that even mean?" Alice asked. I sighed.

"Today I called Mike to come over after everything went down because they told me at the station that they think my mom abducted me. That I'm kidnapped."

"Oh no, oh Bella." Alice grabbed both of my hands.

"But they're not sure, right?" She asked. She was being so calm, I was scared. I nodded slowly.

"I'm so sorry." Alice said, looking me in the eyes. I shrugged.

"Are you okay?" She asked. I shrugged again.

"Then let's not talk about it." Alice smiled. And we didn't. We talked about anything and everything else. It was exactly what I needed.

The next day found me back in the office of my boss Mary. Now, Mary runs our entire floor, supervising everyone. But she's also my favorite person at work. Still, it didn't make it easier to go ask her for another day off.

"Bella, are you in some sort of trouble?" Mary asked. She sat at the desk, her dark hair pinned back. Her brown eyes were surveying me warily. I wanted to say no. The word no was on the tip of my tongue. But then the dam broke.

"I have to go to the police station because they think my mom kidnapped me." I blurted it out so quickly that it took Mary a few seconds to even catch up.

"Oh, Isabella. Have a seat. What happened?" So I told her the whole story, I talked and talked until I couldn't keep my composure any more. Then I started crying. Mary stood, walked around the desk, and hugged me. She just held on to me.

"Bella I'm so sorry." She said. Mary rubbed my back soothingly. She waited until I stopped crying to let go of me.

"That sounds traumatic." Mary said. "I hope it comes to nothing dear, but I just want you to know that I am here for you. I understand if you have to take a few days off until this is all straightened out. Now, do you feel comfortable going back out there?"

"Will you please not tell anyone? At least not until this is all over?" I asked. Mary nodded.

"Of course. Absolutely Bella. Are you good to go back to work?" I nodded.

"I think so. I'll be fine." Mary smiled. "Let me know, alright?"

"Absolutely."

* * *

**A/N: Who saw that coming? I hope nobody was too attached to Mike, because you won't be seeing much more of him! Now I know what a lot of you are thinking, "where is Edward," "bring on Edward," but I promise he's worth waiting for! He'll be here before you know it. Sorry again for the late post! I'm studying "abroad" (other side of the country) this semester and things have been hectic, but that's coming to an end! **

**Feel free to message me if there's anything you're dying to know. And as always, a little review goes a long way. It's hard to know if people like this, or what I can do differently, if you don't review. Besides, it makes me write faster ;) **


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N: Hey guys! I think you're really going to like this one. I want to say an extra special thanks to those of you who reviewed. It means a LOT to me to get everyone's feedback and know what you all think! I've been writing a lot recently so I'm several chapters up and I have a lot coming up for you! **

As you know, the only thing I own here is my plot! Read on:

* * *

One week later, I had decided not to worry. I had decided that it was going to boil down to nothing. So when I walked into the police station, which was starting to feel familiar, I was prepared to be in and out. I even resented having to take the day off.

My first clue that something may have been a bit off was that they told me to wait a few minutes until someone else emptied the meeting room. They told me they had to go over the findings with me in private. Still, I tried to keep up my optimism as I sat in the waiting room. I convinced myself that it was just police protocol.

A few minutes later, true to their word, someone came to get me. The same officer I'd met with previously brought me back to his office. He coughed as I sat down, neither smiling nor frowning, which instantly put me on edge. I looked at the picture of his grinning children and tried to calm down.

"How have you been since the last time I saw you Isabella?" He asked. I cringed at the use of my full name, making everything sound so much more formal than it needed to sound. I didn't say anything, and he frowned.

"Are you alone today?" I nodded. He sighed.

"Have you had any more success contacting your mother?" I shook my head. He leaned back in his chair. Then, he pushed a folder across the table towards me. I looked between him and the envelope, but neither of us spoke. After much too long of a pause, I leaned forward and grabbed it. As I opened it, the room was completely silent. I slowly pulled out the test results.

I won't pretend that I understood everything that was included. But, the front page was absolutely clear. The first time, I had been a 92% match. My new finger prints were a 99% match. As I saw those numbers, my heart sank so far into my stomach I thought that I was going to be sick.

At first I had nothing to say. I slid the results back into the envelope, closed it, and slid it back to him.

"Those are for you to keep, for your personal records." The officer cut off my motion, politely but forcefully sliding the envelope back towards me.

"Now, Isabella, I know this must be upsetting news."

"What are the chances that this is still some big misunderstanding?" I asked. I felt oddly calm. Across the desk his expression shifted to one of deep pity. I shook my head.

"Don't, you don't have to feel bad for me. I don't need you to pity me. Just, I have to know."

"At this point, I'm not allowed to give you that information."

"Excuse me?" I asked. He frowned.

"That is actually what the bulk of our conversation today will be. I need to prepare you for what's coming up next before we transfer your case."

"Transfer?" I asked.

"Yes. Transfer. We don't handle professional missing person's cases with general detectives. So, we are bringing in a specialist to handle your case." At those words, I felt a spark of nerves come over my body. My palms started to sweat, and it felt like there was less air in the room. As he kept telling me about the specialist and the qualifications of a missing person's investigator, I could feel my breathing getting labored. By the time he asked me

"So, am I to report that you haven't spoken to your mother at all since you informed her that she was under investigation?" I responded with

"I can't breathe." He leaned forward.

"Isabella, take a deep breath." I did as he said. "Take another." He kept telling me to take deep breaths until the panic feeling began to ebb away.

"Isabella, I hate to push you when I know you are in a delicate state, but I really need to know. Nothing from your mother? No phone call, email, snail mail or packages, no"

"She sent my birthday present!" I cut in. He nodded.

"Anything in there? Any notes?"

"Just a birthday card. And the package was posted from before I told her." He nodded.

"Alright. The specialist will want to meet with you tomorrow to begin moving forward with your case."

"Wait, tomorrow? I can't do tomorrow!" My eyes widened and my breathing picked up again.

"Miss, there's not much of an option."

"Sir, I'm sure you understand. I work. I cannot take off two days in a row without warning my boss."

"You can decide what hour you would like to meet the specialist, but unfortunately you do have to come in tomorrow. This is now official police business, which means we must demand your compliance. If you would like, I can call your boss." I sat back, defeated, and shook my head.

"There's no need. I'll take a long lunch tomorrow." I acquiesced. I knew I was frowning, and I knew he could tell from my face that I was frustrated.

"The sooner we bring you in, the sooner we come to a resolution. Besides, I think you'll find that working with a specialist is a different experience. Most people prefer it." He tried to put a positive spin on it, but we both knew that the next day would probably suck for me. He stood, and I was quick to do the same.

He reached out like he was going to shake my hand, but when I reached back he grabbed my hand between both of his.

"It is unfortunate that we met under these circumstances, but I want you to know that I am on your side. Whatever happens, I hope this works out for you. I really do." I tried to offer him a smile, one last attempt at kindness, because I knew that I had not been easy to deal with even in spite of my situation. I think he appreciated it, patting my hand sadly before letting me go.

"Don't forget to make your appointment." I did as he asked, making the appointment for my lunch break. I was determined that if I had to meet the specialist it wouldn't interrupt my day any more than it had to.

On the drive back to the apartment, I did something I was typically very opposed to and got fast food. Though I consider myself a healthy eater, especially while I was dating Mike who was opposed to all sorts of fast food, nothing tastes better than chicken nuggets. I got more nuggets than anyone should ever eat at one time, and drove back to the apartment to eat them all.

When I had eaten all the nuggets I possibly could, I tried to call my mom again. Of course, the number was still disconnected. I thought about calling my Aunt Jane, but I decided against it. Though she wasn't as much of a worrier as Tanya, I still didn't want to freak her out and have her drive down to see my mom for nothing.

Then, I did my laundry, still beyond ecstatic that we had free washers and dryers just down the hall from our apartment. While I folded the clothes, I tried to distract myself by planning what I would do when I got into work tomorrow. I knew I had some projects to make up, and I cursed myself for not bringing the work home.

When Angela came in, she was on the phone with someone. Judging by her irritated tone, and the fact that she was speaking only Spanish, I figured she had to be speaking either to her parents or to one of her brothers. Any time she talked to her family she got annoyed – either her mother was asking her about the men in her life, her father was asking her how often she was going to church, or her brothers were just irritating her in general.

She paused long enough to tell me "Jasper is coming over for dinner tonight, his treat." Before getting back on the phone and continuing to her room, closing the door behind her.

Jasper can't cook to save his life, so I knew we were having takeout for dinner. I took that as a sign to bring some mats and napkins to the end tables by the TV, because we never ate takeout anywhere else. Then, I decided to wipe down the kitchen since nobody was going to use it. By the time Alice came in with a grinning Jasper, I had cleaned up, baked a batch of cookies, and cleaned up again. Alice and Jasper tag-teamed me with a hug.

"Bella, if you're trying to steal me from Alice, it's working." Jasper joked, as he smelled the cookies. Alice elbowed him hard in the stomach, and as he protested she smiled sweetly at me.

"Bella, did you clean the whole kitchen?" I nodded.

"What if Jasper wanted to cook? You know, we took that couple's cooking class on Valentine's and with my help he's not entirely hopeless."

"Hey!" Jasper protested, before leaning down to give Alice a peck on the forehead. She hates that. It makes her feel short. She pushed his face away, and then turned to me.

"Never mind. He's completely hopeless and we have Korean Barbecue coming in twenty minutes. Where's Angela?"

"She's in her room arguing with her family." I said, just as her door opened.

"Not true. We weren't arguing. I was just calmly telling my younger brother that it's none of his business to interrogate anybody that I date, especially not someone I've only been on two dates with."

"So arguing." Alice teased, sticking her tongue out playfully. Angela rolled her eyes.

"Whatever. What are we eating?"

"Korean." Jasper and I spoke simultaneously.

"Cool, want to watch a movie?"

"Wait, Bella has to tell us about her meeting at the department." As Alice spoke, everyone looked to me. I shrugged, not wanting to get upset.

"Do you want to talk about it now?" I asked. Alice nodded, even as Jasper put a hand on my shoulder.

"We don't have to, Bella."

"It's fine. I'm fine." I lied. So, we all sat down in the den.

"It's not going away." Was the first thing I said.

"My mom still hasn't gotten in contact with me, and the results came back stronger. Strong enough that I have to meet with a specialist. I'm meeting with the specialist tomorrow."

"Can you get two days off?" Angela was the first to speak up. Alice shot her an incredulous look, but I appreciated the question.

"No, I'm going back to the station during lunch. It's fine."

"Right, so, what does that mean? Are you okay?" I nodded. Alice shook her head.

"Be honest with me, Bella?"

"Look, I can't cry about this anymore. Whatever is going on, I'm not getting out of it. So, after I meet the specialist I'll see what's next."

"Aren't you worried at all?" Jasper asked, leaning forward. Jasper is like a hound when it comes to emotion. He can sniff out people's emotions and he always knows when people are lying about how they feel. So I knew there was no use arguing.

"Okay, it sucks. It really does. It's really difficult and I hate this. And I feel like I'm going deeper and deeper into this and I have no idea what's going on."

"Okay, well is there anything that we can do to help?" Jasper asked. I shook my head.

"No. I just need to stop panicking about this."

"Well, Bella, you know how I feel about being positive. Keep yourself positive, and let this blow over."

"Thanks Alice, but I don't think this is going to blow over."

"Well, you don't know that."

"Alice, it went up to a 99% match. I have to, I don't even know. I have to start to think about this. I mean, something is wrong here. And I can't think about – I'm not even going to say it. I just, I don't know what to think."

"Well, if you bring negativity into it, you'll get negativity out. And I have a good feeling about tomorrow. Something important is going to happen." Alice smiled.

"Alice don't tell her that." Angela glared across the couch to a startled looking Alice. Immediately everyone stared at her.

"What, it's possible." Alice insisted. Jasper looked like he wanted to say something, but he kept his silence as Angela turned to look at me.

"Bella, the truth is, we don't know the truth. I love your mom. Alice loves your mom. Everyone loves your mom. Nobody is saying she's a bad person. But, well…" Angela looked uncomfortable, but suddenly I was seeing red.

"But what Angela? She's not a bad person she's just a psycho who kidnapped a baby?"

"Well, Bella, if it wasn't a possibility you wouldn't be in this situation."

"Thanks Angela. Thanks a lot. That's amazing. So you think all of this is real?"

"Bella, you said yourself that you don't know what to think. I'm not going to sit here and just say what you want to hear."

"Well, you're certainly not saying what I want to hear. So congrats." There was a knock on the door, and I stood up.

"I'm going to the bathroom." I said, but everyone knew why I was really leaving. "I'll come back to eat." Jasper and I stood at the same time, and as he walked to the door I walked to the bathroom. In the bathroom, I tried to calm myself down. Realistically, I knew Angela was being honest. But it still hurt to hear. I didn't even want to consider the possibility that my mom wasn't my mother, and yet the evidence was growing every day.

I tried to call my mom again, and again I got nothing. Alice and Angela argue in different ways. When Alice gets in a fight, once everything is resolved she likes a lot of space to contemplate her own feelings. Angela likes to talk everything out immediately. So when a knock on the door interrupted my second call attempt, I wasn't in the mood.

"Angela I don't want to talk about it." I said. I heard a low laugh.

"Bella, it's me." I opened the door to Jasper more out of surprise than anything. Immediately the smell of Korean Barbeque wafted into the room.

"Bella." Jasper sighed, holding his arms out. Immediately I hugged him.

"You know, you can cry if you have to. It's a lot better than taking out your feelings on Angela for saying what you're thinking."

"It's not fair Jasper." I said. He released me from my hug, and put a hand on each shoulder, looking down at me.

"No, it's really not. But that's not Angela's fault any more than it's yours."

"I just want all of this to disappear. And I really don't need to hear her say that this might be real, because then I'll start to believe it. And I can't believe it, Jasper. I can't believe that about my mom."

"Well, you might have to. Or, this whole thing could blow over and be the weirdest story you ever tell. But either way, you can't blow up at Angela for being honest with you. Because let's be reasonable. You and I know that it doesn't make sense to bet against Alice, but I have a feeling that tomorrow isn't going to be sunshine and roses for you no matter what she says."

"Now are you going to tell me to apologize?" I asked, trying to lighten the mood. Jasper rolled his eyes at me.

"Do I have to tell you?" I huffed, but I knew he was right.

"Thanks." I said. He nodded.

"Any time Bella." The two of us walked back out, and I sat next to Angela. I put my head on her shoulder, and she sighed.

"I'm sorry for being so blunt."

"I'm sorry for overreacting."

"We're good now, right?" She asked. I smiled. "Yeah, we're good."

"Cool, so tell me about the so-called professional. Who even makes a living look for people's missing kids? Maybe we can Google him, see his track record." Angela's grin was downright evil.

"Oh! Yeah Bella, if we can find out some stuff about him we can get you the upper hand in your meeting!" Alice chimed in, smiling. I laughed.

"I don't need to Google him. He's not the enemy. But it is a guy. His name was, uh, something with an E. Ethan, no, Edgar, no, Edward! It was Edward! Edward Cullen."

Sound familiar?


	8. Chapter 7

**A/N: And with that, I am officially a college senior people! I don't talk about me very often on here because I feel like people would rather get on with the story, but this is a pretty big deal! If anyone works in Chicago/San Francisco in marketing and wants to give a random fanfic author a chance come next-round job applications, let me know! Other than that, I'll let you get on with the main event. Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeere's Edward!**

**Don't kill me. **

**The only thing I own here is my plot.**

* * *

At work the next day, I was so distracted that I think everyone knew something was off about me. I almost poured coffee on myself, I threw my stapler away, and I didn't realize that someone was talking to me for two full minutes. All I could think about was how much I didn't want to go to the police station.

Making it worse, people kept suggesting that I take an early lunch to re-focus, and I kept having to politely decline. But I think it was obvious to everybody that I needed to leave. When I got up from my desk at noon, everyone seemed relieved.

Because I knew I was going to be taking a longer lunch that normal, I walked in to Mary's office first.

"Hi Bella, how did everything go yesterday?" Mary greeted me with a smile. Her hair was now in long, thin, black braids. She'd once tried to explain to the whole office how extensions worked, but all I remembered was that the hairdo must have taken her hours. This, of course, reminded me that I might be at the police station for hours if I wasn't careful, and then I got so distracted that I forgot to answer her question.

"Bella?"

"Oh! It didn't." I paused, to recover from being startled. "It didn't go very well. That's what I need to talk to you about. I might be taking a longer lunch than usual today, I need to go back to the station to meet with some sort of detective or specialist."

"Hmm." Mary frowned.

"I promise you, you'd be doing the floor a huge favor. I've been trying my best but I've been sort of out of it all day. I think people would assume I'm just taking some time to get back in the right state of mind."

"Bella, I don't want to put more on your shoulders, but if you think this is going to be an issue it really would be better that we moved to find a more permanent solution." She paused, and then shook her head.

"I phrased that poorly. I hope it's obvious that I don't mean firing you. Because of the sensitive nature of what's going on, would you be open to a new work arrangement?" I shook my head.

"Don't worry, Mary. I'm sure that this will be over before I know it. I have a good feeling about today." I didn't. But I tried to say it with as much confidence as I could handle. I didn't want this to affect my life in any way.

"Alright Bella. Take as much time as you need to today, okay? We can talk about this down the line if it becomes an issue." I nodded.

"Absolutely. Thank you so much, Mary." I smiled as I walked out. By the time I got to my car, my nerves were already shot once again. As I drove to the station, I had no idea what to expect.

Because of traffic, I was a few minutes late when I arrived at the station. They told me that Detective Cullen was already waiting for me in the room, and then an officer showed me to a new office. He opened the door, let me walk in, and closed it behind me.

In the film, this moment is beautiful. As Rosalie Hale and Emmett McCarty lock eyes, their chemistry is palpable. She breathes a sigh of relief, he gives her a tender smile, and you know in that moment that no matter what happens he's going to do what it takes to make her okay. Needless to say, the real moment was a bit different.

As I walked into the room, Detective Cullen sat up and looked towards me. The first thing I noticed was his hair. As anyone who has seen the pictures of him can attest to, it's a strange color that's not-quite red and not-quite brown. He ran a hand through it, before standing up and extending a hand to me.

I noticed the next few things all at once. His amazing jawline. His height. His captivating green eyes. The muscle visible in his forearms, as he wore a button up with rolled-up sleeves rather than a police uniform. It took me a second to reach out and shake his hand, he was that captivating. For one brief moment, I had a positive outlook on this whole situation. Then, reality came crashing down around me and I opened my big mouth.

"How are you old enough to be a detective?" To this day he doesn't believe me, but I swear I meant to ask that question in my head. I didn't even realize I had asked it aloud until he dropped my hand and took a step back.

"Is my age going to be a concern for you, Isabella?" He spoke slowly, like he was afraid I couldn't hear him or like I would burst out in tears any second. It made me wonder what the other officers had told him about me.

"No. I was just curious." I said. Because of his tone, I was determined to keep it together.

"Please, have a seat." He wasn't smiling, but he was still using that gentle tone. I wondered if he always sounded like that. Suddenly, he seemed much less attractive. I sat down across from him at the desk, where he surveyed me quietly for a moment.

"Well, as you already know, I am Detective Edward Cullen. You can call me Edward." I bit back my retort – that I was hardly going to call him Detective Cullen when he was maybe six years older than me – and instead opted for a smile. I knew something was off in my smile when his eyebrows furrowed and he leaned forward.

"Isabella, is something wrong?" He asked. I gave up on smiling.

"Of course not." I said. At this point, I figured that I could manage this one appointment and then tell the officers on the way out that it wasn't going to work out. I could not work with him speaking like that all of the time.

"Good. I'm glad to hear that. Today, I am going to be asking you a series of questions just so that I can get a picture of your side of the situation, and what you have experienced. At any time, if it gets to be too much for you, you can feel free to excuse yourself or take a minute. I can stay in the room, or you can ask me to leave. However, I have to ask you from refraining to leave the room, alright?"

"Can you hold me here? I'm not under arrest; I've done nothing wrong." I protested. Edward shook his head.

"Of course you did nothing wrong. You are not forced to stay here. It would be very helpful for me, though, if you stayed." I stared him in the eyes for a moment, before breaking and asking the question which was still on my mind.

"How old are you? How long have you been doing this?" Edward sighed, seeming a tiny bit frustrated, but then pulled himself together again so quickly that I wasn't sure I hadn't imagined it.

"If it will make you feel more confident. I am twenty-eight. I have been doing this for around four years. I have worked on six high-profile cases, as well as several local cases. I have solved every case I have worked on so far." I nodded, deciding that I wasn't going to give him the privilege of me being impressed. The more he spoke in that careful, calm tone, the more I could feel something slowly building up. I wondered if all of his other cases had been young children, but there was no way I was going to ask.

"Alright, if that's everything from you. The first thing I want to know is how long you have lived with Tanya Denali in Boston." I smiled.

"Mom and I have always lived there. Well, almost always. I was born in Montana, but she moved to Boston to be closer to her sister and to escape a cult when I was a baby."

"Do you know when Tanya left the cult with you?"

"I don't know, like eight months after I was born? I was less than a year old when we moved, I think. There are pictures at my mom's house of me and her in our new apartment when I was a baby."

"Any newborn or hospital pictures?" Edward asked. I fought the urge to roll my eyes.

"No, she had a home birth and typically people don't take pictures of those. There's not really many pictures of me before we moved away from the cult."

"Alright, I can see that you don't want to talk about your childhood."

"I have no problem talking about my childhood! I had a wonderful childhood. My mom is the most supportive parent you can imagine, and I am blessed to have her."

"You seem very protective of your mother." He gave me this soft smile, like you do to show a little kid that you're listening. I could feel myself getting slowly more and more irritated. I hoped this meet-and-greet would come to an end soon.

"I've heard that most kids of single mothers tend to be protective of their parent. It was just me and mom in the world, you know. My Aunt helped out when she could, but my mom did everything for me. She's the reason I did well in school, got good grades, went to MIT, all of it."

"Does your mother tell you that you cannot achieve good things without her?"

"No. Actually the opposite. She empowers me to feel like I am smart, dedicated, and capable. Her love is empowering. There was nothing I ever wanted to do that she thought I wouldn't achieve." He seemed to be thrown off for a brief moment, and I felt like I had won some battle. Then he looked back up at me, and continued as if nothing was wrong.

"Alright Isabella, now, how do you correspond with Tanya currently?"

"Mostly by phone. I know what you're going to say, and it's not weird for her to change phone numbers. Maybe in the midst of planning for Mexico, she just forgot that I don't have her new number. My mother has never taken a vacation like this before."

"You don't think it's a little strange that she decided to take this vacation right after you called her and informed her of your arrest?" He said it so gently, so calmly. I wondered if he had any idea how patronizing he was being. Or how transparent.

"As I explained before, my mother was already planning on making the trip. She just forgot to tell me. Or maybe, she was scared to tell me. We could never really afford trips like that when I was growing up. My roommate thinks she might feel guilty about taking the trip without me."

"So, the last time you had any correspondence with your mother was the last time you spoke on the phone?"

"What counts as correspondence?"

"What else do you have?"

"My mother sent me a birthday present."

"What was her present?" My eyes widened, and immediately I felt myself growing a little pink. The more he stared at me, the more I knew I was blushing. Eventually he seemed to catch on that it was a sensitive subject, leaning forward.

"You must be pretty close to her then, if she sent something you don't feel comfortable sharing." His voice seemed rougher somehow, lower. He cleared his throat. I sighed.

"It's not whatever you're thinking. Just, uh, clothes. And that's not all she sent me."

"What else was in the package? Does your mother usually buy you such personal items?" So I hadn't fooled him. I decided to do my best not to care.

"She only sent me that stuff for me and my boyfriend. And she also sent me a card. And there's another package coming." I knew I was getting a bit defensive in my embarrassment. I tried to take a breath to calm down. He shifted in his seat, and when he spoke again that overly cautious tone was back.

"Your mother knows your boyfriend? Did she introduce the two of you? Is she normally so involved in your romantic relationships?"

"For your information, Michael and I broke up. My mom doesn't know yet, but even though she liked him when I told her we were fighting she told me never to settle." He cleared his throat again.

"Tanya is unaware that you are single? What was in the second package?" I stared at him, unsure which question to answer first. He sighed.

"I apologize, I didn't mean to overwhelm you. What was in the second package?" I shrugged.

"You haven't received it yet?" He asked. I shook my head, but at his disbelieving frown I felt the need to clarify.

"My mother sent this package when she told me she was going to Mexico. It's some of my baby things, birth certificate, things like that. She said it's time for me to have them, now that I'm living on my own." I didn't expect him to frown, or for his eyebrows to sink so low on his face. He gave me a calculating stare, before leaning back in his chair.

"Your mother sent you this package after you told her about the arrest?" He asked, his tone slower, more careful, than ever before.

"Technically, yes. I guess me getting arrested made her worry about me not having them." He nodded.

"When the package arrives, please bring it to the station." He said.

"Excuse me?"

"Bring it to the station, so that I can look through it." He explained carefully. I shook my head.

"No."

"Isabella, I don't think you – "

"I'm not giving you permission to look through it." I said. Edward shook his head slowly.

"Unfortunately Isabella, that package is considered evidence in this case. Any correspondence between you and Tanya, in any form, until we reach a point of clarification or conclusion, is evidence. Would you like to see the warrant?" At this point, I had moved past irritation firmly into anger.

"You wouldn't even know about the package if I hadn't told you about it. You're telling me I don't have rights to my own care package?"

"No. It's a good thing that you told me about it, Isabella." He placed his emphasis on the word good, as if he was teaching me a lesson on ethics. Suddenly, without realizing it, I reached my boiling point.

"Look. I don't know where you get off, but I doubt that a care package with my birth certificate and some baby pictures is going to be admissible in a court of law, even if this whole thing ever went to trial. And it won't! Because neither me nor my mother have done anything wrong!"

"Isabella, it makes sense to be frustrated or upset. This must be a very confusing and difficult situation for you. But if you can work with me, it will make this whole process easier on everyone involved." I wanted to refuse, but something he said threw me off. I frowned, trying to piece out what was weird about what he said. Then it hit me.

"What do you mean by everyone involved?" I asked slowly. His eyes closed in frustration, like I had asked something that he didn't want to answer.

"I wasn't going to tell you this early." He said. I stared at him expectantly.

"Well, as you know there are several stakeholders in this case. Of course there is you. There is Tanya Denali. Now that I am involved, I would love to see this come to a resolution. Then, there are the Swans." My jaw dropped open, and I stared at him eyes wide.

"You, the Swans know? You've talked to those people?"

"Isabella, those people might be your parents. We wouldn't even have re-opened the case at all without contacting them about the possible development."

"You weren't going to tell me, but you've told some strangers that I might be their missing baby?" I asked, hating the fact that I was dangerously close to yelling.

"Isabella," Edward started to try to calm me down, but I held up a hand to stop him.

"You know what? This has been a great time. It truly has. But I'm done here." I stood up as I spoke, straightening myself out before heading for the door.

"Isabella I would prefer it if you and I could go through a few more questions before…" I didn't hear what else he said because the door had already shut behind me. As immature as it was, shutting the door on him felt like a personal victory. As I made my way back to work, I felt just the tiniest bit better.

With the meeting behind me, I was much more productive at work. I dodged Mary's question about how everything went, and focused on getting as much work done as possible. In the back of my head, the fact that the Swans – that mysterious family – had been contacted, really irritated me. But I was still riding high on the shocked look on Edward's face when I stood up and left.


	9. Chapter 8

**A/N: Hey everyone! Sorry for the delay, I just got internet back after some complications. Yesterday, most of my closest friends graduated from their various universities. So, congratulations to everyone who has graduated recently, from school or even just from a stage of your life. I am proud of you! One year left for me :D**

**As usual, reviews make me smile and so do all of you! I own nothing in this story except for my plot. **

* * *

In my attempts to catch up with my work, I ended up leaving the office later. By the time I got home, only Alice was home. She was painting her nails on the couch when I walked in, and she waved with her free hand when she saw me. I waved back, and started making my way to my room.

"I met Ben!" She blurted. I stopped.

"Wait, what?"

"He came over and surprised Angela. She opened the door and he was still in his work clothes and he was like 'I had to see you' and she blushed Bella, actually blushed. And then she wanted to pretend she had stuff to do but like the selfless angel I am I volunteered to do her dish duty and she had nothing else. So she went. But before she went, I got to meet him."

"What did you think?"

"Oh Bella, he was so precious. He's really cute, even though he's not as tall as Angela. And he has the most beautiful eyes. The way he was looking at Angela, they are beyond meant to be. They are going to work out, for sure."

"Oh, he sounds nice."

"Wow Bella, don't get too excited. When did Mike ever show up just because he missed you? Even Jasper doesn't do that very often and we've almost put marriage on the table."

"Sorry Alice, just had a long day."

"Well brighten up! Bella, this guy looked at Angela like she was a goddess. Be happy for her!" Alice stuck her tongue out at me, and in a weird way it did kind of lift my spirit. I was in a better mood as I made my way back to my room. Minutes later, I was comfy in some sweatpants and I came back out to see what I'd do for dinner.

"Know what you want for dinner Alice, or want me to handle something?" I asked. She was still diligently painting.

"Oh, that could be fun! Then I could do your nails." She was staring at my hands with narrowed eyes from her spot on the couch, and I quickly shoved them into my pockets.

"If you want," I said. "What do you want for dinner?"

"Oh, if I still have some shrimp we could do pasta. I've been craving like a linguini or something." I checked, and Alice did have shrimp, so I set about putting things together for a pasta.

"Oh, wait, I have to tell you about this new project at work. Bella, I swear, sometimes I hate my job."

"No you don't."

"No, I guess I don't. But I promise I will hate this project." I let Alice do most of the talking as I cooked. It was easier, for one, but it was also a great distraction. After she painted her nails she dipped her hands and feet in ice water, her sworn secret for making her nails dry faster and last longer, and then helped me finish cooking. When we sat down to eat, Alice wasn't going any slower. We'd moved on from her workplace drama to her and Jasper.

"I know it sounds ridiculous because I know he's afraid of commitment and I knew it when I started dating him. Before he told me even! But Bella, I know we're going to get married one day. I just wish he knew it too."

"Alice, I'm not going to argue with you."

"Then tell me about your day. I know you had to meet the detective. I didn't forget. Was he old and grumpy?"

"No, he was barely older than any of us."

"Oh. Oh man, was he hot?" Alice leaned in, eyes wide. I was going to say no, but I could feel my face heat up. From her smug expression, I knew that I had to be blushing pretty hard.

"He was hot! Tell me about the sexy detective. Was he tall? Did he have any scars? Tattoos? Oh, was he in a sexy uniform?"

"Alice! No, he wasn't in a uniform or anything. I don't know, he had nice eyes."

"You're not blushing like that because of his eyes."

"What do you want to hear? He did have nice eyes and a good jawline and great hair. He was, attractive. But Alice he was an ass."

"Who was an ass?" I hadn't even heard Angela come home, but when she sat down she had a plate of food in her hands.

"The sexy detective Bella's working with." Alice offered, staring me down. Her eyes were narrowed and she was leaning forward on her hands, as if she was the one interrogating me. Angela joined in, staring at me over her plate of pasta.

"What did he do?" Angela asked.

"He's condescending. Ridiculously condescending. Everything he said to me was like he was speaking to some mental patient." I huffed, leaning back in my chair. Already I could feel myself getting frustrated.

"Maybe he was trying to be delicate." Alice offered.

"Alice, you just want him to be nice because he's hot." Angela teased, bumping shoulders with Alice.

"Go ahead Bella, let it out. You're clearly pissed."

"I walk in and I don't know, I didn't expect like a hug or anything but, okay, well actually I might have insulted him a little bit."

"Bella!" "What did you say?" Alice was shaking her head at me, like she couldn't believe I offended an attractive man, and Angela was staring me down like she didn't know whether to scold me or laugh. I shrugged.

"I kind of asked him how he was old enough to be a detective. But to be fair, like, he's really young. And anyways, the next thing he said was like he was talking to a five year old."

"Well?" Alice asked.

"Well what?"

"How old is he?"

"Twenty-eight Alice. And he told me he's solved every case he's worked on but realistically that has to be like what, five cases?"

"You didn't take it easy on this guy, did you Bella?"

"Angela he didn't take it easy on me! He kept talking like, do you remember when we watched your cousin's son for the day and he kept crying? Remember how by the end we said everything in that stupid voice with a big smile on our faces so we wouldn't set him off? He spoke like that. Only everything I said he would try to summarize it and make all these generalizations. Like I would say that we didn't travel much and he would be like 'so your mother didn't let you leave the house?' and things like that. Ugh, just so condescending!" Alice and Angela were staring at me with wide eyes, and I could feel my face getting redder and redder.

"Oh boy." Alice said after a while, to fill the silence. I shook my head.

"It gets better. He basically tricked me into telling him about the package my mom is sending me, and I have to bring it in to the station when it gets here. I can't even open it. He was rubbing the warrant in my face and everything. The only reason he didn't confiscate my birthday present is because it was personal."

"Geez, Bella." Angela shook her head.

"No, wait. Here's the best part. He's already told the Swans that I might be their missing baby. But he wasn't going to tell me. If I hadn't basically figured it out myself, I still wouldn't know. He even told me he wasn't going to tell me. That's when I walked out."

"You what!" Alice's scream was so loud that Angela and I literally scooted away from the table.

"Bella, what, you, what?" She repeated, at a lower decibel.

"I walked out? I'm not under arrest, I'm not a suspect. I wasn't going to sit there with someone who wasn't going to tell me the truth. I think next time I go in I'm going to tell them to assign my case to someone else."

"Oh Bella, don't do that." I looked at Angela in surprise.

"Why not?" I asked, nose wrinkled.

"Look, I know guys like this. He's treating you like that because he thinks you're a girl and your silly female emotions are going to get in the way of things. All you have to do is wait until the next time you see him. If he does it again, just tell him that you're an adult and you'd appreciate it if he would treat you like one. Don't back down!" I looked to Alice, but to my surprise she was nodding.

"Bella I agree, if you get a new detective that's like giving in. Besides, the chance of you getting two attractive detectives is next to none. Even if he's an ass at least he's a cute ass, and you don't know, another detective might be even worse." Alice gave me a concerned smile, tilting her head to the side.

"Look, I'll figure it out the next time I have to see him. I don't even want to think about this anymore. Angela, tell us what you just did with Ben." Seeing the bright smile that took over Angela's face brightened my mood substantially. She looked down, unusually bashful for Angela, before speaking.

"I'm sure Alice told you everything about him showing up, but Bella it was so sweet. He showed up and I opened the door and he was just standing there, smiling. He said he missed me and that he felt like he just had to see me, how could I say no to that? So we just walked around for a while, nothing complicated. We ate street hot dogs and then he took me to this ice cream place that makes custom ice cream sandwiches. It was sweet. He's really sweet." I smiled.

"Good, you deserve someone really sweet." Alice smiled too.

"Today someone said we made a beautiful couple which was weird, because like I don't think about what we look like together because I'm so tall."

"So? I'm a foot shorter than Jasper." Alice rolled her eyes, but Angela shook her head.

"No way, that's different." Angela protested. Alice just rolled her eyes again. Angela turned to look at me staring between the two of them, and laughed.

"Bella calm down. You can't get it you're perfectly average height."

"I'm kind of tall." I said, but then we all burst out laughing. The first to stop was Alice, who slapped a hand down onto the table.

"I remember what I wanted to say earlier. Bella, have you talked to your aunt Jane about this whole thing?" As Angela and I fought to even out our breathing, I shook my head.

"No way."

"Come on Bella, seriously. I think you should."

"Alice, Aunt Jane works in a hospital. She has an overnight shift once a week. I don't need to make her worry for no reason, you know what I mean? This is a problem for me and for my mom. We'll sort this out just the two of us."

"Wait Bella, I see Alice's point. Don't you think she'd want to know?" I shook my head again, and this time I was a bit more adamant when I spoke.

"You guys don't get it. Aunt Jane will freak out if she hears this, seriously. Then she'll want to fly out here to be with me, since mom would never accept the money for the ticket. But that means taking time off work, and that's not fair to ask of her. If it turns into something serious, I can talk to her on the phone at any time. But why freak her out, right?"

"Bella…" Alice began, but then she shrugged. "It's your choice."

"Ugh, Alice don't do that. It's not going to work. It is my choice, and I'm going to stand by it." Alice just shrugged at me again. Angela was quick to change the subject, talking about some new game technology that she had to show us. When we'd all finished eating, we moved in to watch our evening shows while Alice painted my nails. By the time I went to bed that night, I thought that I was ready for anything Edward Cullen could possibly throw at me.

I was beyond wrong.

The next morning, I was running late to work when I couldn't find my keys. It was only after searching everywhere else in our entire apartment that I remembered that I'd still been holding them when I went to the bathroom. Sure enough, they were down at the foot of the toilet where I'd left them, mocking me.

Needless to say, I was already frazzled and nervous when I got to work. As I made my way to my desk everyone was giving me weird stares, some giving me a thumbs up and others shaking their heads at me. I was so sure that they were making fun of me for being late that I didn't consider any other possibility until I noticed someone sitting in my chair.

This someone had crazy, copper hair, bright green eyes, and a huge frown on an otherwise attractive face. He stood up when he saw me approaching, and I saw red.

"Isabella." He greeted me, as if he was speaking to a truant teenager. I shook my head.

"Get out." I said, trying to push past him.

"Isabella I need to speak to you." He said. I turned to stare him down.

"You get out or I'm calling security."

"I am not leaving until we finish our conversation." He said. Without warning I grabbed onto the sleeve of his button up, and pulled him into Mary's office. She looked up, startled.

"Mary, can we have a conference room?" I asked, trying my best not to take my anger out on her. She looked between us.

"Is this Michael?" She asked, confused. I shook my head.

"I'd really rather you didn't handle personal business at work, but if you need – "

"This isn't" Edward went to cut her off, but I elbowed him in the stomach, hard.

"Believe me Mary, this isn't personal. I don't want him here anymore than you do. Can we please have the space?" She nodded, looking between us warily.

"You can have the Bonsai room." She smiled nervously. I nodded, and before Edward could say anything I pulled him back out, and down the hall. Everyone was looking at us as we marched past, and I just knew that come lunchtime I was going to have to make up an excuse for why he was there.

"How did you even get in here?" I asked him quietly.

"I presented my badge and they told me what floor I needed." I fought to keep my emotions in check until we reached the conference room. I opened the door and followed him in, shutting it behind me.

"Isabella, was that necessary?" He said, as soon as we were both in. He had already sat down, making himself comfortable.

"There's no need to sit, this will be brief." I said.

"Actually, I still have a few things I need to discuss." He said, pulling a file folder out of an overstuffed tan leather messenger bag. I shook my head.

"Actually, last night I looked up my rights. I am not a criminal in this case, nor am I a minor, and therefore I don't have to speak to you at all. So I am going to invoke that right and remove myself from this investigation. Now, since I am not a part of your investigation you are trespassing on – on private property and you will leave, immediately. Do not ever, ever come to my place of work with your arrogant, condescending attitude ever again." By time I had finished speaking, Edward's eyebrows had furrowed low above his eyes. He looked confused.

"Why would you want to remove yourself, don't you want to know the truth?"

"Tanya Denali is my mother. That is the truth. Besides, if you're good at your job –"

"That's another thing, what do you mean condescending?" He was leaning towards me in his chair, looking at me like I was speaking a foreign language.

"You have got to be kidding me. You act like – like I'm a six year old having a temper tantrum, and you talk like you're speaking to a little girl. I'm an adult, Edward. Clearly, you're not capable of treating me like one."

"In what way?" He challenged. I could tell he was irritated by the set of his jaw, but it only made me want to keep arguing.

"Well, aside from speaking to me like a child, you have tried to call all of the shots and dictate all of my behaviors. My mom never did that, and I don't need you to do it either."

"I'm sorry if you feel I've been a bit overbearing but –"

"A bit? You came to my place of work, uninvited, with no warning. That's not a bit anything, that's humiliating. I'm going to have to deal with the repercussions of that when you leave, you know. And you had no idea about my workplace dynamics. My boss clearly thought you were a personal guest, which I'm not allowed to have. You could have gotten me fired today, or forced me to tell a whole office of people about my personal business. But you didn't care, you just came storming in here. Same thing with yesterday. Everything out of your mouth was condescending or just plain rude." I was panting by the time I finished saying that, and I knew that I had to be flushed all over. I took a deep breath, and leaned back against the wall, staring at him.

He stared back at me, looking both guilty and a bit hurt. But I refused to feel bad. Even though I realized that some of my anger with him was due to the situation, I also felt he was severely in the wrong.

"I'm sorry." He said after a long time. I scoffed, and turned to leave, but in a second he was out of his chair and he'd grabbed my wrist. I turned to look back at him, to tell him to let go of me, but he beat me to the punch.

"I mean it, I'm sorry. I guess, you're the oldest case I've ever had. Normally its children, some of them babies. I thought I was being, I don't know, calming or something. But I guess, maybe I was trying to assert my authority." He paused, jaw clenched, like apologizing was killing him. But I wasn't going to let him off the hook.

"I don't understand why you wouldn't want to know the truth. But it's not my job to understand. I won't make you answer my questions. But, if we aren't going to be meeting, I need you to promise me that you will bring me any news you get from your mother, including that package, alright? If not for you, then for the sake of the Swans. They deserve an answer too, can we agree on that?"

I wanted to say no just to spite him, but I couldn't. Especially not after telling him to treat me like an adult. Instead, I nodded.

"Great." He said, except neither of us felt great in that moment, and it came out pretty forced.

"Okay, so need me to see you out?" I asked. He shook his head. "I'm fine." So I walked out in front of him and moved back to my desk to finally begin work for the day. I worked through lunch to avoid the gossip, and also because I didn't have much of an appetite, and because of it I was able to go home early enough to miss the end-of-day conversation.

Back at home, the only thing I told Alice and Angela was that Edward and I had come to an agreement.


	10. Chapter 9

**A/N: I've been in kind of a writing funk lately (don't worry, I'm still way ahead in chapters) and I hate being that person that demands reviews but the few I got last week really helped. I promise I'm never looking for something super complicated. Even just a smiley face to know that someone out there is reading this and enjoying this really makes a difference. I'm also sick right now though, and I know that's probably contributing to me not being motivated to write. **

**Shout out to the people who did review - you put a huge smile on my face! As usual, I don't own anything here except my plot :D **

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This is probably the point in my narrative where you are either thinking 1. How did she end up married to that asshole? Or 2. How did he ever fall for her after that irrational argument?

My advice to you is, don't re-watch the movie looking for clues, because you won't find any. Just stick with me on this ride, and I promise you that we will get there in the end.

Three days after coming to that uneasy agreement with Edward, I decided that I had forgiven him. After all, he had apologized, begrudging or not. I felt like I had won, since he agreed that I didn't have to speak to him in the station. Things at work hadn't even been that bad. That Saturday, while Alice spent the day helping Jasper paint his apartment, and Angela attended a work function where I just knew she'd be flirting with Ben, I decided to go to a bookstore.

As I walked around, I found myself in the mystery section browsing titles and descriptions. There were tons of books, some of them with incredibly far-fetched plots. I wandered from mystery into thriller, and from thriller into romance. Each section had wild, out-there, crazy plots for their main characters. More of a math-brain, I had never done much reading outside of the classics. However, I grew more and more curious as I wondered if any book had a plot that was in any way more ridiculous than the situation I was in.

I spent so much time there that by the time I left, I had missed lunch. Torn between a late lunch and waiting it out until dinner, I missed the package in front of our apartment entirely. I only noted its arrival when I ran right into it, tripping over the top and falling sideways into the door. A woman down the hall called out to ask if I was alright, but in my embarrassment I nodded and waved.

The box was flat and wide, but not very tall. I leaned down to pick it up and saw that it was from my mother. My first reaction was joy. I held it as I unlocked my door, leaning into my apartment. I was tempted to shake it, but if it was just a few photos and legal documents I was sure that it wouldn't matter.

I set it down on the kitchen counter while I put my bag down and went to look in the fridge. Aside from learning that I needed to go grocery shopping, I didn't see anything particularly appealing. I turned back to the box on the counter, and that's when I remembered my deal with Edward.

I wanted to rip the box open, see what my mother sent me, decide what I wanted to keep, and then drive the rest over before work. But, I knew that would make me as childish as I told him I wasn't. Instead, I stared at the box, wondering exactly what I was supposed to do. When I couldn't make up my mind, I decided to call him.

This is when I realized that I had never gotten his direct phone number. Instead, I had to look up the number for the Seattle PD Office I had been to. Finding it in my call log on my cell phone, I took a deep breath and hit send.

"Hi, this is Margaret, do you have an appointment with Chief DeMarcus?"

"Who?" I asked.

"Sweetheart, you might have the wrong number, this is a police phone."

"Don't hang up! I'm, this is Isabella Denali. I'm trying to reach Detective Edward Cullen." I said, trying to speak quickly.

"Who?"

"Edward Cullen." I repeated. She was silent for a minute, and I could hear a tapping sound in the background.

"Alright Miss Denali, do you have a pen and paper available? I'm going to give you his direct number."

"Give me a second." I scurried down the hall into my room. I grabbed a pen and some random paper from my desk, sitting down in my desk chair.

"All set. Sorry." I said.

"That's fine m'am. His number is" She repeated it twice before she was sure that I had it right. She asked if she could do anything else, and when I told her that I was all set she told me to have a nice afternoon. I agreed, hung up, and then stared at the number and my phone. I wasn't sure it was the best idea, but I had no other options.

He didn't pick up until the fourth ring. For four, seemingly shrill, never ending ringing noises, I wondered if the woman had given me the wrong number. But then, he answered his phone.

"You've reached Edward!" He said. His tone was so laid back, open, and friendly that I was taken aback. I was silent for a bit too long, because he started

"Wrong num –" "No I don't have the wrong number!" I cut him off. He paused.

"Isabella?" He asked, his voice sharp.

"Uh, yes."

"How did you get this number?" His voice was confused, and slightly accusatory. I could feel myself getting irritated, but I forced myself to stay calm.

"I called the station and they gave it to me." I said. He sighed.

"Sorry, I don't mean to accuse you of anything. Of course you did. This is my personal cell phone number, however. It must have gotten mixed up in the system."

"Oh, I'm sorry." I said, for nothing better to say.

"No, not your fault. Uh, why are you calling? Did something happen?" His tone got more serious, and I could tell he was shifting into detective mode. I sighed.

"Can you give me your professional phone number, so that if something happens again I know what number to call?" He was silent for a while, which surprised me. I wasn't sure what to expect, and I wondered if maybe he had been given a new professional number by the Seattle PD and didn't have it memorized yet. Then he sighed.

"You know what, you can go ahead and just use this number."

"Oh." I said. I hadn't expected that. I thought it was weird of him to offer, but I would have felt even weirder declining.

"My package arrived. From my mother." I said, wanting to move forward with the conversation.

"Great!" I hadn't expected that. "Where are you now?" I hadn't expected that either. The whole conversation was going in an entirely different direction than I could have expected.

"I'm at home." I said, but it came out as more of a question.

"Okay, I'll be there soon, don't open it without me."

"You'll what?" I asked, sure that I had heard him wrong.

"Unless you'd rather drive to the police station, I thought it would be easier if I came to your apartment." He said. Then, as an afterthought "Is that okay?"

"Oh, well, I guess. My address is –" "I know your address. Apartment 33, right?"

"Right." I said, drawing the word out. If Edward realized how creepy the whole interaction was, he didn't say anything. All he said was,

"I will be there in about twenty minutes. Don't open the package without me Isabella."

I didn't. Instead, I scrambled like a madwoman trying to clean up all the visible parts of the apartment. I straightened up the kitchen, tidied up the den, organized everyone's shoes, and in what I thought was a stroke of genius, cleaned up and put away the cosmetics in the bathroom. I had just finished closing the doors to everyone's bedrooms when I heard the knock on our door.

I opened it, and there stood Edward. He was dressed casually, in a white V-neck tee shirt and dark-wash Levi's. He even had Toms on, and I realized then that he definitely hadn't been in the office. I wasn't much better, I realized belatedly. All I was wearing was an old sundress with thin spaghetti straps, my cardigan abandoned to my room in my tidying frenzy.

"Sorry, come in." I said, when I realized I'd been standing, staring at him. I extended my arm, and he moved past me into the apartment, immediately walking towards the box on the counter.

"Is this it?" He asked. I nodded, and then when I realized he couldn't see me by the door I called

"Yeah, that's it."

"Bring scissors." He called.

"You're not opening it." I said, surprising even myself. He turned abruptly, looking at me where I stood by the door.

"Well, you're not going to open it by the door, or without scissors." He said. I knew he was right, and I made my way to the counter. I walked around to the kitchen drawers, and pulled out a pair of scissors. He pushed the box towards me.

"Go ahead."

"Okay, right." I said, just a tiny bit flustered as I cut the box open. Inside was a bit of a mess, which I knew I hadn't helped by tripping over it. Still, I started with the photographs. There were some of me with Tanya and Jane when I was just under a year old.

"I was a really tiny baby, they thought I would be slow for a while" I said, as I showed him the pictures.

"Oh, here's my first Halloween." I said, showing him a picture of me dressed as a cat with a tiny headband and black onesie with a tail.

"See, completely normal." I smiled, as I showed him more and more. It seemed like I'd received the bulk of my pictures from childhood all the way to high school. I didn't show my awkward pre-teen or teenage pictures, but I did show enough pictures from my childhood to prove, in my opinion, that I was a happy and loved. Edward's face stayed stoic.

"That's most of the pictures." I said, once I'd run out of young, cute photos. I set all the rest of them aside, and then pulled out a manila folder. Inside of it was my birth certificate and my social security ID card.

"These are good, which I know for a fact because when you start a bank account they check your social. Also student loans." I smiled eagerly. Edward nodded towards the box, prompting me to pull out the next item. This one was the CD she had attempted to make at once point. Though my mom was nowhere near almost famous, she had managed to talk a DJ who was attracted to her into helping her produce an album. It barely sold, but she was so proud of the CD." He looked at it, then set it down and nodded once more to the box.

"Okay, uh, oh. This is my old blanket from when I was a baby. Look how tiny it is, there's a picture of me and my mom and this blanket, right" I dug through the pile of photos.

"Right here." I pushed it over to him. He looked at it, and then pushed it back to me.

"Is that everything?" He asked. I shook my head.

"Here's the ribbon for when I won first place as a mathlete in eighth grade. I beat all the boys in our school district, my mom was really proud." There was a picture too, but he didn't need to see that.

"So, aside from these documents, is the rest of the box old mementos?" Edward asked. I pushed the box over to him.

"I want to take my time with this. These are my memories, you know? So if you're looking for something in particular you can go ahead." I said, trying to keep my tone light. I realized that watching me look through a box of my old junk was more of a me-Alice-Angela activity than something to do with the man investigating whether or not I was kidnapped.

"Oh, I didn't mean to rush you." He said, pushing the box back towards me.

"No, really, it's fine. There's a couple more ribbons and a baby scrapbook in here. Not exactly exciting. If you know what you'd be looking for you can go ahead." I pushed it back to him. He was about to say something, hands already on the box, when the door opened.

"Or if Bella is home she can cook something because really…" Alice trailed off, looking between me and Edward with wide eyes. Behind her, Jasper was trying to nudge her forward so that he could shut the door.

"Bella, who is this?" Alice asked, smirking. I sighed, looking at Edward and wondering why he had to be attractive. If he'd been fifty and balding, Alice would have connected the dots right away.

"Alice, this is Detective Edward Cullen. Edward, this is my roommate Alice Brandon, and her boyfriend Jasper Whitlock." I let them take care of the hand-shaking while I stared into the box.

There really wasn't as much left as I thought. I pulled out a few more ribbons, and my baby scrapbook. The only thing left, at the bottom, was a bulky, sealed envelope.

"Edward, there's not much left in here. Just some ribbons, the book, and a letter." I looked up, and from the way the three of them were looking at me I knew I had interrupted.

"Sorry." I said.

"Bella, did you know Edward hasn't eaten anything? You called him as he was about to go get lunch." She stared at me pointedly, and I sighed.

"Are you and Jasper hungry too? I might as well make dinner." I said.

"Oh you don't have to." Edward rubbed the back of his neck, pulling his tee shirt tight against his biceps. He really was handsome, I had to admit. Lean and well-toned, he looked like he took care of himself. I looked away from him to see Alice giving me a knowing look, and I quickly glanced towards the fridge.

"No, it's fine Edward. I cook for these people all the time. I think that's the real reason they let me move in. While I'm starting up with this, you can look through those ribbons and the scrapbook. Alice, can you open the envelope at the bottom?"

They both moved at once, Edward leafing through the scrapbook while Alice approached the box and carefully opened the envelope. Meanwhile, I took out some frozen chicken breasts and prepared to thaw them in the microwave.

"Anything you can't eat, Edward?" I asked. He shook his head. I looked through the fridge again, and then through the cabinets.

"Looks like rice." I said, as I pulled out the giant bag of rice I'd bought over a month ago. It would finally come in handy. In the freezer I had a bag of frozen vegetables, and so did Alice. I figured she wouldn't mind, so I took those out to thaw too.

"Bella, there's some keys and a letter. That's it."

"Can you read it?"

"Out loud?"

"No, that's fine, just let me know the highlights." As I spoke, I got the rice going in our rice cooker, and then got the chicken out of the microwave and began marinating it with things from our spice rack.

"You really don't have to cook for me." I jumped at having Edward so close; I hadn't heard him when he walked up. He looked down at me, looking more concerned than I had ever seen him.

"If you looked at me like that before I wouldn't have thought you were condescending." I said, because I have perpetual foot-in-mouth disease. His eyebrows furrowed, but behind him Alice burst out laughing.

"Wow, Bella. Nice. Edward, what she meant to say was that she doesn't mind at all. Bella cooks for us more often than not. Angela and I are decent, but I think she missed her true calling in life."

"She's exaggerating." I told Edward, nudging him out of my way to grab a baking pan for the chicken. I got it into the oven, and then moved to wash my hands.

"Okay, I'm done." Alice announced. In the background I heard the TV flick on, and I wondered when Jasper had wandered over.

"What did it say?" I asked, as I dumped the vegetables into a bowl and began filling it with warm water.

"First, your mom apologized about Mexico. It's exactly like we thought, she feels guilty about being able to afford it now that she doesn't have a daughter. She also said she'll call you again when she's back, and that she deactivated her phone because it won't work while she's there."

"See!" I turned triumphantly towards Edward, who had moved closer to Alice and the letter.

"I'll take that into consideration." He said, and by his tone of voice I could tell that was back in business mode.

"Anyways, she also gave you a key to her storage unit. She says that in the event anything happens she wants you to be able to have access to her things without having to break in."

"Was that everything in the letter?" Edward asked Alice, leaning forward.

"Oh, well. I mean she asked about me and Angela. Well, and Mike but we hate him. She said to mail her your response so it'll be waiting for her when she gets home. Other than that, not really?" Alice looked up at Edward, and I think he realized he was intimidating her because he took a step back and turned to me.

"Do you want to hear the next steps before or after dinner?" He asked. I smiled, both because he had asked and because he'd agreed to stay for dinner. I didn't want to feel like I owed him a meal.

"Tell her now, Bella can't handle suspense!" Jasper called from his spot on the couch, before I could speak up. I blushed, but I couldn't disagree.

"What he said." I muttered. Edward nodded.

"Right, well, now that you got to see everything it's coming into the office with me."

"What?" My face fell.

"Isabella, all of this is evidence." He sighed when I didn't look any happier.

"Hey, a lot of this, including that letter, will probably count as evidence in favor of Tanya Denali. It corroborates your understanding of the events, and might show that she had no clear understanding of her possible charges before she left the country." I nodded.

"Should I go on?" He asked. I nodded again.

"Alright, well uh. At some point you're going to have to open that storage locker for us. We'd normally just break into it but I'm sure you'd rather we didn't." I stared at him.

"The locker is in Massachusetts. That's where she lives." I stared at Edward.

"I'm aware. We can break in if you don't want to make the trip."

"No! No, don't do that. Just, okay, I'll go. Eventually."

"Right, and one more thing I think you should know. The Swans have decided to come to Seattle." I gasped, biting down hard on my lip to stop myself from saying something. Seeing my face, Edward kept speaking.

"It was their decision to make. Like I said before, they are just as invested in this as you are. They would like to meet you. Now, obviously, I cannot make you meet them. But from my personal perspective, I really think that you should. Meeting them does not mean admitting anything." I felt arms wrap around me, and I looked down to see Alice.

"Edward, why don't you go get to know Jasper on the couch." Alice smiled at him, before turning to look at me.

"Bella, sweetheart, are you going to keep it together?" She asked. I nodded. I wasn't upset, just shocked. It had never occurred to me that the Swans would want to meet me in person, nor that it would be my choice. For a second, I regretted confronting Edward. If he had forced me to meet them, I wouldn't feel bad.

"Alright, well, just keep cooking. I'll tell you about my day with Jasper." She said. And she did. While I got everything finished, took it all out, and even while I was plating it, Alice kept me occupied with stories of her day. When Angela got home, looking happier than any work function could have made her, she told me all about her day with Ben. Even as the five of us ate dinner, both of my girls kept me from having to speak directly to Edward.

I didn't talk to him one on one until after he ate, when he headed out. Jasper had tried to convince him to stay longer, but he looked over at me and declined. I helped him pack everything from my mom back into its box, and I got the door for him. He stepped out and turned around, and he looked like he wanted to say something.

Instead, all he said was "Thank you for dinner." I smiled.

"No problem. Keep me updated. Bye."

"Bye." And just like that, he was gone.


	11. Chapter 10

**A/N: I am coming at you from the other side of the world! I'm sure it's not even Saturday yet for some of you, but I wanted to post this before I forgot. After like 18 hours of traveling I have arrived in my home for the summer! I want to thank every single person who reviewed last time. It honestly made a really huge difference for me - both in writing and in just feeling good about this story. I'm still holding onto the last dregs of this illness, but hopefully I can shake it off soon! All that being said, I know you're not here for my author's note - so I'll get on with the chapter!**

**As usual, sadly, I do not in fact own anything here but my plot!**

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At that point, I didn't know how I felt about Edward Cullen. I wasn't angry with him anymore – I didn't feel like I could be after he had apologized and was clearly trying to be nicer. But that put me in the awkward position of realizing how attractive he is. As Alice pointed out barely five minutes after he'd left, Edward was much more attractive than anyone I had dated while she knew me, especially Mike. I didn't tell her that Mike was the hottest guy I had ever dated; I was worried she might have a fit.

Without a reason to dislike him, it was hard to put a name on my relationship with Edward. It felt weird that I had his actual cell phone number, and it was weird to know that I had fed him, even though I had been the one insisting that he ate at our place. I wasn't sure if I had broken some kind of social code, because I wasn't sure what typical investigator/investigatee formality was. Also, I wasn't under investigation either, although everything between me and my mother was subject to search.

Still, when I got a phone call from him early the following Friday, I wasn't sure if it was appropriate to not want to pick up. I decided that it was irresponsible, like skipping a work call, so I put down my coffee and picked up my phone.

"Hello, Edward." I said, opting for formality.

"Hey, Bella, I'm glad I caught you. Is this a good time?" I glanced at the clock. I had to leave early for work, but not before eight. Still, he sounded stressed out. I was sure he wouldn't appreciate sarcasm.

"As good a time as any. Why, is something wrong?" I asked. He sounded like he'd been working for hours already, and I couldn't imagine what could have him so stressed out.

"Okay, good. I met the Swans. They arrived in Seattle Wednesday evening and I spent all day yesterday debriefing them." When I didn't say anything, Edward sighed heavily into the phone.

"That was kind of a bomb, I know, I'm sorry. I don't have a lot of time to make this phone call in, the Chief wanted me to call you when I left last night but I fell asleep as soon as I got home. Then I woke up late. I'm on my way to the station now."

"Ok." I said, confused about why he sounded so stressed. I'd known the Swans were coming for almost a week.

"Oh, I didn't. Ugh. Let me clarify, the Swans want to meet you. Actually, you have to take a DNA test. That is the one thing that the court can force you to do. But they want to meet you before that. Renee Swan says she'll know if you're her daughter when she sees you. They don't want to pay for the test until then." It took me a few seconds to process everything that Edward said.

"Wait, did they, when?" I asked. Suddenly I had a terrible feeling about why he was so stressed out.

"Not today, right?" I asked.

"No. Tomorrow." Edward said. I closed my eyes. This was too much to process on half a mug of coffee.

"I can't say no?" I asked, my voice hesitant and quiet.

"I'm sorry, Isabella."

"Bella." I corrected reflexively.

"Oh, okay. I heard your friends call you that but I wasn't sure…" Edward trailed off.

"Can we get back to this?" I asked.

"Yeah, sorry. You can't deny the DNA test. But you can deny their request to meet them, technically forever. Even after the DNA test if you want, because you're an adult. But uh, but honestly Bella I wouldn't." I was so shocked about the difference it made to hear call me Bella, that I waited too long to speak.

"I'm not trying to tell you what to do! I'm, I know we talked about that. Really, I just, I've met them Bella and they're good people. I know that this has been difficult for you, and that you don't want to be involved, but they would really love to meet you. It really means a lot to them." He sounded so earnest. He was really pleading for this to happen. I told myself that if I could give them peace of mind, even though I was still so sure this would be a misunderstanding, it was my job to make them feel better.

"Okay." I said.

"Really?" He said, sounding genuinely shocked.

"I don't have any plans for tomorrow. I was just going to sleep in. You can tell the chief that I'll meet them, and comply for the DNA test, and then I can put all of this behind me."

"You don't know…" Edward cut himself off, clearing his throat. "Alright, thank you."

"See you tomorrow. What time?"

"Tomorrow afternoon. Two. At the station."

"See you then. Bye."

"Bye, Bella." Edward hung up, and I stared at my phone. Already, I wasn't sure if I had made the right decision. But backing out was not an option. I was sure Edward was already on the phone with the chief letting him know that I had confirmed. So, I decided that I would deal with it.

By the time I left work, I was in a much better mood about the whole thing. I realized that there was a chance Renee Swan would look at me and say "that's not my daughter!" and the Swans would refuse the DNA test and close the case. I thought about looking for the Swans on social media, and trying to make myself look nothing like them, but I realized that was probably crossing a line.

When I told Alice and Angela over dinner, this time a pizza since we'd all refused to cook, even Angela had to admit that it would be pretty funny. We imagined Renee Swan being even blonder than my mom, and refusing to believe that she could have a brunette daughter. We imagined that both of the Swans had fiery red hair, making it obvious that I couldn't be related to them. We imagined them as an interracial couple, who would take one look at lily-white little me and agree that I couldn't be their child. By the time I went to bed, I was almost excited to meet them.

Still, that didn't make the next day any easier. I had forgotten to set an alarm, so I slept in even later than I intended. I didn't wake up until Angela ducked in to say that she was going grocery shopping, saw me asleep, and got me out of bed. She told me that I'd been mumbling something about a man in my sleep, but that this dream man wasn't going to feed me if I didn't give her my grocery money and my list. I made a list quickly, handed her some cash, and tried to decide what to do in the two hours I had left.

After an hour of watching Netflix, for nothing better to do, I let Alice persuade me to help her build her new desk. By the time I needed to start getting ready to leave, I was almost happy to go. The desk had so many small moving parts, that we still had yet to finish more than the main frame. She assured me that this desk was going to revolutionize her life, but I wanted no part in it. She wouldn't even have been building it if she hadn't bet Jasper that she could do it without his help. She could; I just wished she would do it without my help.

I wasn't sure what to wear to meet the Swans, so I decided on a lace dress Alice had talked me into buying. It was somewhat casual and somewhat dressy, a good first impression dress. I packed my bag, put on a little make-up, and then I was off to the station.

Edward greeted me outside the station, which was probably the first thing that put me on edge. He walked in behind me, guiding me past the police desks and others in the office to a hallway I'd never walked down before.

"We don't really have a greeting room area in Seattle, but I think this room works." He said, closer behind me than I'd expected. I looked over my shoulder at him.

"Are they already here?" I asked. He nodded. I stopped moving.

"Can I change my mind?" I asked. He stared at me.

"Is…Bella are you alright?" I nodded, exhaling shakily. All of a sudden this seemed like a very bad idea.

"Let's keep moving." He said, keeping his voice low. He stepped in front of me, and I followed him the rest of the way to the room.

"I'll be in there with you, okay? You won't be alone." He said. I nodded, taking another deep breath. Then, he opened the door.

I noticed the room first. It looked like it had once been an office, but was currently unused. Someone had stuck a few chairs in the room, and a window was letting in a lot of natural sunlight, but other than that the room was pretty bare. It was nothing like the warm, inviting room that movie me walks into when she first meets her family.

Then, I locked eyes with Renee Swan, who stood when she heard me come in. She had hair just like mine – somewhere between curly and wavy, and almost but not quite red. She gasped when our eyes met, and I felt my heart beat pick up.

I looked away from her, and I saw my eyes. They were on the face of a man, a man who looked tired but hopeful, as he saw me. But they were definitely my eyes – the same shape, and the exact same shade of brown that was light in the sunlight but dark indoors. I subconsciously reached for Edward's hand.

I looked away from him, and I saw a third person that I hadn't even noticed. She was younger than me, somewhere between a teenager and an adult still. Her hair was browner than mine. Her eyes were lighter than mine. Her lips were fuller than mine. Other than that, it was like looking into a mirror. I squeezed Edward's hand painfully tight in mine.

"OhmyGod." I said it in a rush, and I wasn't even sure I had spoken it out loud. These people were related to me. They had to be. My brain couldn't process it all fast enough. I stared between the three of them as they stared back at me.

"Oh, Charlie." Renee Swan said, holding onto her husband's hand for support. She even sounded a bit like me.

I was starting to get a head ache. I couldn't handle it. My brain was at war with itself. They had to be related to me. They couldn't possibly be related to me. My mother had kidnapped me. I was betraying my mother. This woman was my mother. My thoughts got faster, and louder, and angrier and suddenly I couldn't breathe. I was staring between them faster, and faster, and faster. I was gasping, literally gasping for air.

"Are you alright? Is she alright?" The girl spoke, first to me then to Edward.

"Calm down. Take a deep breath." I was beyond a deep breath. I was beyond air. It felt like the more I tried to calm myself down, the more I couldn't breathe. I heaved a gasping sob, and then next thing I knew my face was on Edward's shoulder and I was crying. I wasn't sure how it happened. I couldn't breathe. It was too much. It was all too much.

"Is there anything we can do?" The man asked. His voice was low, soothing. I had never had a father, I thought. Or maybe I had always had one. I couldn't remember. I cried harder.

"Bella." Edward cooed.

"That was her name. Mom, that's her name!" The girl sounded like she was on the verge of crying herself. I had barely heard any of them speak and I knew their voices would haunt me.

"Bella, do you want to leave the room?" Edward asked me. I focused on his voice. I nodded into his chest. Then I whispered.

"I don't want them to hate me." Or maybe it wasn't a whisper, because I heard Renee's quiet gasp as I said that, heard her quiet

"We could never." It was too much. I nodded again. I heard Edward tell them that I was having a panic attack, that he was really sorry, and that he would talk to them soon. I didn't hear what they said afterwards, and next thing I knew Edward had an arm around my shoulder and we were walking. I kept my head buried in his shoulder as we walked, just crying. I didn't know why I was crying, and that only made me cry harder, tangling in with everything else in my system that I did not understand. Then, I was sitting and Edward was kneeling in front of me. We made eye contact for a brief moment, before I slid down onto the floor next to him, burying my face in his shoulder once more.

"Bella, can you hear me?" He asked. I nodded. He placed his hand on my back, and began to gently rub circles into my back. I nodded again.

"I would like to hear your voice. Can you do that for me? Can you tell me that you can hear me?"

"I – hear – you" I gasped between every word, but I got it out.

"Good job. Good. Okay, let's take a deep breath. Can you do that with me? Ready, inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale. Okay, I'll keep going. When you feel ready, try to join in." I tried matching my breathing to him, although my exhales still came out more like quiet sobbing.

"Inhale, exhale. Good job. Good job Bella." I could feel my heart again, racing in my chest. My breath hitched, and my breathing started to pick back up.

"Inhale, exhale Bella. Good job. Come on." I tried again, breathing slowly, matching my breaths to his.

"Okay, now let's count to ten together. Can you do that with me? Ready, one, two," I joined him, counting to ten. When we got to ten we started over. And over, and over, and over, slower and slower each time.

"Come on Bella, you can do this. I'm right here with you. Take another deep breath. My heart felt more normal. I was still crying, but I realized that I could breathe again. I took another deep breath and it was less shaky, stronger.

"I am so proud of you." Edward murmured, almost too quietly for me to hear. My breathing had gotten more even. I felt more present. My thoughts were making sense. Even my crying was less frantic, I was beginning to remember where I was.

"Do you want me to take you home? Tell me what you want Bella." Edward said. I took another deep breath, all on my own.

"Can I go home, please?" I asked, my voice soft and pleading.

"Absolutely." He helped me get to my car, and got me into the passenger seat. At this point I was more aware of where I was. Edward didn't say anything as he drove me back to my apartment, and I appreciated that. I felt so tired, it felt like I could sleep for a year. I didn't want to talk.

When we got to my apartment, I had to tell him where to park my car. He helped me out, even though I mumbled that I was fine. He walked with me all the way back up to my door, before handing my keys and my bag, which I hadn't even realized he'd been holding.

"Call me when you feel up to it, okay?" Edward said, quietly enough that nobody else would have heard him. I unlocked my door, and he made to walk away, but I stopped him with a hand on his arm.

"What was that?" I asked him.

"I think you had a panic attack. Have you ever had one before?" He spoke just a bit slowly, calm and soothing. A part of me wondered why he hadn't addressed me that way from the beginning, which is how I knew that I was going to be okay.

"I don't think so." I said. He reached up and patted my shoulder, suddenly awkward.

"Get a lot of sleep tonight. Don't do anything too taxing, trust me. You don't have to tell your roommates either – not if you don't want to. I know that a panic attack is incredibly personal. Give yourself as much time to relax as you need. Just, please give me a call as soon as you feel up to it?" He patted my shoulder again, and then he was off down the hallway. It wasn't until he turned the corner that I realized I hadn't thanked him.

I did end up telling Alice and Angela. With Angela's help, Alice gave me space and let me do my own thing. I went to bed ridiculously early, and slept like a rock until the next morning. Still feeling a bit strange, I took a bubble bath with a bath bomb Alice had convinced me to buy, more thankful for our tub than ever before. Then, after a relaxing breakfast made by Angela, it was time to call Edward.

"Bella?" He definitely seemed surprised.

"Is this a good time?" I thought it would be funny to echo his greeting form yesterday, but the joke felt awkward as I said it.

"How are you feeling?" He asked.

"Alright, thanks to you. That's why I'm calling, actually. I just, thank you. Really. You didn't have to do that and it was so, so, incredible. Honestly. Thank you."

"Oh….yeah…" He said. I didn't mean to put him on the spot, and I wasn't expecting any kind of reaction. I just had to thank him for taking care of me.

"Edward, it really meant a lot to me. You didn't have to take care of me like that, but you did. Don't say anything, I just want you to know that I really appreciated it." I said. Then, after an awkward pause, I asked the question that had been on my mind since I'd woken up.

"How are the Swans?" Edward was quiet for long enough for me to fear the worst, before he said

"They were thrown by your…by yesterday. But they were more worried about you than anything else. They uh, Renee has called me twice asking me if you were okay. I wasn't, I told her I hadn't spoken to you yet."

"Oh."

"They uh, Bella they want to move forward with the DNA test. For obvious reasons." Edward exhaled heavily after he said the last part, and I could just tell that he was about to try to take it back, so I spoke quickly.

"You're right. I, I don't, there's something there. I don't want to think about the implications but there is definitely something going on there. I think that it'll be better, healthier for all of us if we know." I said.

"Can I tell them you said that? If they ask?" Edward asked me.

"Yeah, absolutely." I said. "Talk to you soon Edward. Bye."

"Bye Bella."


	12. Chapter 11

**A/N: So, for positive news, I had a GREAT first week at my internship - and I've still been keeping up with my writing. However, I shed my cough just in time to get food poisoning. Seriously, please send me your well wishes because I have not been able to catch a break! Another huge thank-you to everyone who had reviewed, favorited, or followed this story - but especially those of you who've reviewed! It really means a lot to me, and keeps me motivated. **

**I do not own this story, or these characters. Just my plot 3. **

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If waiting to meet Edward Cullen had me spacey and jittery, waiting to take my DNA test had the exact opposite effect. I was hyper-focused the next Friday. Edward had called me back on Wednesday evening asking if I could stop by quickly on Friday to take the test. I told him I would come once I got off work. Then, I proceeded to work my butt off for all of Friday. I didn't let myself get distracted by any of the things that normally distracted me: not the internet, not my co-workers, not the thought of the weekend, not even hunger. I would have skipped lunch if someone hadn't given me the extra sandwich the deli down the block had made him by mistake.

I was so focused that I even missed the bustle of people getting ready to leave the office. Normally I leave between five and five thirty, but that Friday it was a quarter past six before I even glanced at the clock to realize that I could leave. Then I didn't end up leaving until six thirty, when I was satisfied with the status of the report I was working on. As I walked out, I passed Mary chatting with one of the junior executives.

"Bella, if you keep this up you're going to be moving down here soon!" Mary joked as I walked past. I smiled.

"I'm just really inspired today." I said, walking down and out the door. The thought was intriguing, I'd been with the company for two years at that point, and normally a promotion came in year four. But it wasn't unheard of for people to be promoted earlier, especially if they did exceptional work. Of course, then I remembered where I had to drive to and that line of thought quickly died.

As I drove, I recalled some of the research I'd done on panic attacks. I had decided that it wasn't really a surprise that I'd had one, considering the situation and everything that was going on. I also read about ways to stop them before they started, wanting to be prepared in case it ever became an issue again. I was determined to react normally to whatever the DNA test revealed.

When I walked into the precinct, the woman at the front desk eyed me warily.

"Isabella Denali?" She asked. I nodded. She frowned. "Detective Cullen was waiting for you out here for an hour missy. He expected you around six." I glanced at my watch, and it was almost seven.

"I'm sorry." I said, because there was nothing else to be said.

"Well, he had to go take care of some personal business but he left all of the equipment in his office. Come on." She stood abruptly, and I hurried to follow her past the main entrance and down a hallway. Outside of my panic attack, I realized I had never actually been in Edward's Office.

She leaned into the door to open it, flipping on a light switch near the door. I looked around the room slowly. It was a lot less personal than I had expected, even though by now I had guessed that Edward worked out of wherever his cases came up. The only sign that it was his office was a White Sox poster taped on the wall, and a UPenn mug on his desk. It startled me; I had never even thought to guess where Edward might have gone to school.

"Here it is. Alright, now the instructions are on there. If you can't figure it out, let me know and I can do it for you." The woman startled me out of my thoughts, but I turned to her quickly, with a smile.

"I've got it. Thank you. Should I leave it in here when I'm done, or is there somewhere I should drop it off?"

"You can drop it off with me on the way out." And with that, she was gone and I was alone in Edward's office.

I'd done a buccal swab several times in my time at MIT, both for individual projects and for the two biology classes that I'd taken. It was almost second nature for me to open the kit, set everything up, and begin swiping my cheek. As I did, I looked around. The office really was bare. I fought the urge to shift through his desk, and instead I focused on the White Sox poster. I don't really care about baseball, but you can't live anywhere near Boston without being at least somewhat of a Red Sox fan. I'd never even heard of the White Sox, and I found myself lost in thought about whether there was actually a coalition of different Sox teams across the country.

I realized I'd been standing there rubbing my cheek for a ridiculously long time, so I quickly finished up and made my way back to the front desk.

"Thank you." I smiled at the woman at the desk. She nodded.

"You'll have your results in twenty four hours. Have a nice evening." She said. I nodded, and saw myself out.

By the time I got home, I needed a distraction. All I could think about was the twenty-four hours until I got my results. So, the second I walked in I made a beeline for Alice's room. I knocked first, but when she said come in I barged in. Angela and I had both learned our lesson about that the hard way, it was hard to know when Jasper would or wouldn't be over in the evenings, and they never locked the door. She and Jasper were sitting on the bed, but they both had their clothes on so I was alright.

"What's up Bella?"

"Do you want to go out? Nothing too crazy, just some dancing or something?"

"Are you feeling alright?" Jasper asked. I wasn't sure if he was being genuine or poking fun at me for wanting to be social. I also didn't care.

"Anywhere you want, Alice." I pleaded. She smiled.

"If you just want to dance, I know a place with half priced drinks on Fridays. You have to pay to reserve big tables though, so we'd mostly be standing. But you'll like this place, you can wear sneakers."

"Done." I said, barely letting her finish her sentence. She laughed.

"Want to see if Angela will DD?" She asked.

"I don't mind." Jasper cut in, but Alice shook her head.

"After last time, I'm not taking any chances. Whoever does it needs to live here, so we know we can get in." Jasper rolled his eyes, but he didn't disagree.

"Sure, I'll ask." I said. Angela was in the living room, deep into some game I could never remember the name of. Angela is scary when she plays, unusually silent and almost completely still except for her hands. Luckily she heard me coming, and spoke first.

"What's up Bella?"

"Want to come out with me and Alice?"

"I can't, I have a work thing tomorrow. Not a fun one either."

"We know. Alice thought you might DD? If you want?"

"Yeah, why not. Give me another half hour with this, I need to help my team secure this completely before I can leave. Let's leave at…" She somehow managed to reach out and grab her phone without ever breaking her concentration on the screen. She looked at the time, and tossed it back onto the couch.

"Let's leave at eight thirty? I really can't stay out late otherwise I'd say we should leave later. And just so you know if I'm DDing you and Alice are paying my cover."

"Done! Thank you Angela!" I smiled. I took Alice's comment about the sneakers to heart, but other than that I had fun getting all dressed up. It was exactly the distraction I needed. I wore a dress Angela had made me buy on a dare, a red skater dress with two cutouts in the midriff, and paired it with my gray Toms. Then I went crazy with my makeup, going for dramatic winged liner – which I had to re-do four times – and a bold red lip. I even attempted to curl my hair, although I ended up just curling the front and putting it half-up half-down. Still, by the time we were ready to leave I felt ready for a wild night on the town.

We left in my car, since Jasper hates riding in Angela's beetle and we can't all fit in Alice's car. Alice drives a Porsche. It's an old car; it was brand new in 2000 when her mom got it as a birthday present. But it's still a Porsche. Alice doesn't keep a lot of things that indicate how much her family is worth: her dad being a celebrity plastic surgeon and her mom some kind of Korean celebrity. But she loves the Porsche.

By contrast, I drove a red flatbed truck that I had saved for two summers to buy. It was my first car, and even after getting a job it didn't make sense to me to replace it when it still drove just fine. Alice hates driving it, but Angela loves the truck just as much as I do.

We piled into my car, Angela behind my wheel and next thing I knew we were walking into the club. It was fairly empty, mostly due to the early hour, so we were able to grab one of the free smaller tables on the floor. We all sat down, and Angela and I slid Jasper money for drinks.

He came back quickly, telling us that they would bring it over, and we all sat listening to the music. It was nice. This place was nothing like where we'd gone for my birthday, but I liked it even better because it was so casual. A waitress came back with our drinks, shots, and change, which made me like the place even more. We all did a shot of tequila, except for Angela who began sipping her sprite. Then, I grabbed my Corona. It was very satisfying to watch the lime slip down the neck of the bottle, before I began to drink it.

We waited until the place filled up a bit more to dance, leaving our jackets at the table in hopes of saving it. While Alice and Jasper did their thing, I got to dance with Angela. Neither of us have much rhythm, unlike Alice who dances like she's going pro, so we just had fun going crazy to the music.

When my Corona finished some guy was conveniently there to bring me to the bar to get another one, and I also got Angela another sprite since I felt bad. I danced with him for a while, but when he started getting handsy Angela and I made our way back to our table.

Luckily, it hadn't been snatched up yet, so we sat back down and looked out over the dance floor. I was just about to comment on a group of girls that had to be underage, when Angela choked on her Sprite.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"That's Ben." She whispered, nodding her head out towards the dance floor.

"Is he here with some girl?" I asked indignantly, looking out over everything.

"No! Bella don't be so obvious. No, he's with a group of guy friends, I think. It's him and three other guys. Over there. Green button down." I tried to be more subtle. The guy she was pointing at was cute. He had a very clean cut appearance, and he certainly didn't look short.

"Let's go over there." I said, standing up.

"Okay, I'm not getting you another Corona." Angela joked, pulling me back down. I rolled my eyes.

"Can we at least go dance again?" I asked. She did a quick scan for the guy from before, but he was nowhere in sight.

"Fine. But way, way over there." She said, pointing to the complete opposite side of the room from Ben and his friends.

"Fine." I said. I downed the last of my second Corona, and she downer her sprite, and then we were off.

"I love this song!" I cheered as we walked. I stopped Angela short of her destination to dance with me. A guy tried to dance between us at one point, trying to chat up Angela, but we just stepped around him and kept dancing. Another guy came up behind me, but from Angela's expression I could tell he wasn't cute. Besides, I wasn't in the mood. I just wanted to have fun with my girls. Every so often, Angela would steer us in a different direction, and I knew it was because she thought she'd gotten a peek of Ben.

A couple of songs later we were having a lot of fun. Somehow I'd ended up with my third Corona, which Angela told me was my last Corona. We met up with Alice and Jasper again, and both of them were clearly tipsy and having a great time. I was singing along as we danced. Angela must have been having too much fun, because next thing I knew the green shirt guy slipped an arm around her waist.

Angela turned to tell him off, and then stopped short when she saw it was him.

"Ben! Hey!" She exclaimed, trying a bit too hard to sound casual. To my surprise, he just kissed her on the cheek.

"You can stop avoiding me now." He laughed. I took this as a cue that I should start laughing too, which set Alice and Jasper off. Everyone was laughing except Angela, who looked mortified.

"I wasn't avoiding you…" Angela frowned.

"Ah, I get it. You were avoiding my friends. But there's no need, these are cool guys." It wasn't until he said that, that I noticed his three friends standing behind him. I decided I needed to be more polite.

"Hi, I'm Bella." I said, offering my hand to the one nearest to me. He laughed.

"Is she drunk or just friendly?" He asked Angela, but I answered before she could.

"Probably drunk. Or tipsy." I shrugged. "But still Bella." As they all spoke up I learned all of their names, going around their semicircle. Angela and Ben got into their own private conversation, while I danced with Alice, Jasper, and Ben's friends. Even though we were all having a blast, I was also watching Ben and Angela.

Ben was a good two inches shorter than her, just enough to make it obvious that she was the taller one. Even still, they were an undeniably cute couple. They just looked good with each other, and I kept looking at them. At one point Ben's friends decided to do a round of shots, and I joined them.

When one of them asked Alice what brought us out that night, she told them that I'd been having a rough time and needed a good day. I wasn't drunk enough to tell them the whole story, but I did end up telling them that I was having a hard couple of weeks and needed to let loose. I let them think it was work.

I checked my phone soon after that, and I was surprised to see that it was already almost midnight. It didn't feel like we'd been out for three hours. At that point, one of Ben's friends wanted to sit down, so I ended up walking back with him to our table. Our luck had held, and somehow it was still empty except for our coats. He sat down and got on the phone with his girlfriend, which is when I took out my phone.

To be honest, I should probably be thankful that my first instinct wasn't to call my boss or someone I worked with. Instead, as my mind wandered back to my earlier activity, I had the bright idea to call Edward.

"Bella, is something wrong?" He greeted me.

"I took the buccal swab." I said, cheerily.

"Uh, okay."

"Did you get it?" I asked.

"Well, no. It goes to a lab. Are you alright? Why are you calling so late?" I suddenly recalled the things I had gleaned from his office.

"Wait a minute. How come you didn't tell me you went to Penn? That's an Ivy League School. Good job."

"Uh, thank you. Bella, are you drunk?"

"Not that drunk. I don't need to be arrested again. I don't know what you could tell me that's worse than this time, but I don't want to find out."

"Where are you? Is someone with you?"

"I'm fine. I'm here with Ben's friend. And Angela and Alice are here. And Jasper. And Ben."

"Okay. I don't want to be rude but, why exactly did you call?"

"To tell you about the buccal swab, so you know I did it. And to ask you how many sox there are."

"What? How many in the world?" Edward sounded confused, and I realized how vague my question had been.

"Not like, socks for your feet. Sox. I only know the Red Sox. But you like the White Sox. So how many colors of Sox are there?" Edward burst out laughing.

"I wish I could record this conversation for you. There are only two Sox teams, Bella."

"Okay, great. Now I know. Oh, I should go, I really like this song. But first, do you want to know a secret?"

"Only if it's something you won't regret telling me." Edward cautioned, the laughter in his voice gone. I sighed.

"It's relevant to my situation. I just kind of want to know if you think it's messed up that I can't decide whether I want this test to come out positive or negative. I feel like I'd be wrecked either way, and I just can't make up my mind." Edward was silent for a while, and then he sighed.

"I think you'd be messed up if you didn't feel some kind of turmoil. So how about don't worry what you're feeling and just feel it, especially if you're drunk."

"I'm tipsy at best." I argued. "Goodnight Edward." He snorted, and I could practically see him rolling his eyes.

"Yeah, okay. Goodnight Bella."

I put my phone back in my bag, got back up, and danced. Shortly after my phone call, Angela called it a night and drove us all back to the apartment. I felt lighter and more at peace than I had in a while. When I got to bed, I had a calm, untroubled night's sleep.


	13. Chapter 12

**A/N: I had a good week! Everyone's reviews made me smile, I'm doing well at my internship, I'm *finally* not sick, and my friends and I are planning probably the most epic vacation I will ever take. I especially want to highlight that review part. It really does make a difference to know that people are reading this story and to know what you all like about it. So thank you, to everyone who's been favorite/following, and especially to everyone who's left a review!**

**Sadly, the only thing I own is my plot. **

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And now, for a series of messages.

Sunday, 8:00 A.M.: "Hey Bella, I realize you might not be awake yet. Your DNA results came in, sorry for the delay. If you could come in today that would be great. I want to give you the news and go over the report in person. Give me a call when you wake up."

Sunday, 9:30 A.M.: "Hey Bella, it's Edward. Uh, Detective Cullen. I already went over the results with the Swans, since they got up before you. Give me a call when you get this, I didn't realize you slept in so late."

Sunday, 11:23 A.M.: "Hey again, still Edward. You really uh, either you're sleeping or avoiding me. Anyways I have a lot of things that I have to take care of so it would be very helpful if you would call me when you wake up."

I woke up at around 11:30, and saw the three missed messages. I unplugged my phone, and brought it with me to the kitchen. As soon as I put a pot of coffee on, I called Edward back.

"Are you just waking up?" He answered, incredulous.

"Good morning to you too." I answered.

"Good morning, Bella. Did you listen to my messages?"

"Just the last one."

"Of course. Well uh, your DNA results came in. I'm sorry for the delay, we really were expecting them yesterday. The Swans have already come in and looked at everything, so now it's just you. I'm really hoping you can come in today, I have a lot of things to take care of."

"Give me a minute." I said in response. I set my phone down and moved to pour myself a cup of coffee, while I tried to piece out what he was saying. Did he have to take care of things because he had to close the case, or was he arranging the next stage of his investigation? Did he call them the Swans because he realized they weren't related to me, or just because that's what he was used to calling them? After my first sip of coffee, I picked my phone back up.

"I can come in an hour." I said.

"Oh, that's prompt. Thank you!" Edward breathed a relieved sigh into the phone, and I tried not to worry too much about what that meant.

An hour later, after my coffee, a shower, and some breakfast, Angela and I were on the way to the police station. I figured that I would need the moral support either way. The drive to the station was silent except for the radio. I think Angela didn't know what to say, and I didn't want to jinx anything by saying the wrong thing.

Once again Edward was waiting outside the precinct. If he was surprised at seeing Angela, he didn't show it.

"Good afternoon, ladies." He said. It was weird coming from him, unusually formal, and I think that's the moment I knew it was going to be bad news. My stomach felt heavy like a rock, my heart lurched, and it was like all of the positivity left me at once. I have no idea how she knew, but Angela linked her arm through mine and kept me walking. I wanted to run away.

"How was yesterday for you?" Edward asked as we walked, still somewhat stiff.

"Nobody was hung over, if that's what you mean. I made this one chug about three glasses of water before she slept." Angela answered for me.

"You knew she called me?" Edward asked.

"Yeah, she wasn't being very quiet. Ben's friend thought she was pregnant because she kept talking about tests and results."

"He did?" I asked.

"Yeah, don't worry. We set him straight. We told him you were waiting for a great grandparent to die so you could inherit the family fortune." Normally I would have laughed, but I couldn't shake the gloom.

"Bella, do you want Angela to be in the room when you hear the news?" Edward asked. If I didn't know for sure with his overly polite tone, that sealed the deal. As we stood outside his office, I reached out and grabbed Angela's arm.

"Let's do this." I said, trying and failing to sound brave. Edward opened the door and ushered us in. His office was looking a little more personal. He had a potted plant in the corner, and he had added a nameplate to his desk. Angela and I sat down.

"Band-aid, or"

"You have to give it to her slowly. Bella hates surprises." Angela cut him off, looking at me. I nodded. Edward closed his eyes in thought.

"In order to make this analysis as complete as possible, Charlie and Renee both agreed that they wanted to test you against everyone in the family at once. Would you like me to explain the mechanics of DNA testing?"

"Was it a standard STR test?" I asked. Edward nodded.

"I'm caught up." I said.

"Okay, well, I don't really know how else to…"

"You can just say it." I said, because I knew. I knew what he was going to say.

"Bella, after testing your DNA against Charles, Renee, and Vanessa Swan we know that you are, in fact, the Swans' missing daughter." I knew, and yet it still hurt so much to hear him say it out loud.

"Thank you." I said. Inside, I felt like all of my thoughts had been turned up too loud. Outside, I nodded politely. Outside, I asked,

"Is there anything else that we need to go over today?"

"Do you want the report?" Edward was staring at me with narrowed eyes. I shook my head.

"No, thank you."

"The only thing to do would be to talk about the next steps. But, that's up to the Swans. I do have to tell you that at this point Tanya Denali is under investigation. The minute she returns from Mexico, if she ever returns, she will be brought into custody. But other than that I can't confirm what will happen next."

"Keep me in the loop." I said, standing. Through all of this, Angela was looking at me with a frown. I knew that I wasn't fooling her, I probably wasn't fooling Edward. But I didn't care. I just wanted to leave as quickly as possible.

"Wait, Bella, before you leave…" Edward looked lost as to what he wanted to say. I stared at him.

"Just, are you, let me know how you're doing, alright?" He paused, and then he pulled out a business card and handed it to Angela.

"Just in case." He said. Angela thanked him, and then she stood as well.

"Bye, Angela, Bye Bella." Edward said, still looking straight at me. It was like he was trying to read me, to see what I was thinking. I gave him a tight, empty smile.

"Bye Edward." I said, before I started walking out. I didn't even wait for Angela, though she easily caught up to me.

"Do you want me to drive?" Angela asked. I passed her my keys. The drive back was just as silent as the drive there. We parked, re-entered the building, and walked up to our apartment in complete silence.

"What do you want for lunch?" Angela asked as we walked in.

"Don't worry about me." I said. As she started looking in the drawers for food, I grabbed the bag of apples I'd asked Angela to buy me, and pulled out my phone.

"Hello, you've reached the office of –"

"It's me. It's Isabella. Hey Mary, I just wanted to tell you that I'm taking unpaid leave this week. I'm sorry that this is so last minute, an emergency has come up."

"Do you need anything?"

"Nope. Not a thing. Bye."

"Oh! Alright, see you in a week. Feel free to call me if you need anything Bella. Bye." I hated being rude to Mary, but I was at the end of my strength. Holding my phone in one hand, and apples in the other, I moved into my room. I very carefully put the apples on my desk, plugged in my phone, and locked the door to my room. Then, I fell onto my bed and began to cry.

I felt like I was dying as I lay there, sobbing my eyes out, like my world was coming to an end. I cried, and I cried, and I cried, and until I felt like I was dying of thirst. I grabbed a water bottle from the case I kept in my room, and drank it in one gulp. Then I just lay in my bed staring at the ceiling and fell asleep.

I woke up at about 2 A.M. and ate an apple. It reminded me of the time Tanya had driven us to an apple orchard and let me pick apples for 3 hours straight. I thought of the sacrifices she had to make. Then I remembered that she had taken me from my real family. I remembered the Swans' faces. I cried while I ate that apple, then cried myself back to sleep.

The next morning, both Alice and Angela tried to wake me up for work. I didn't budge, and eventually they both left. Alice came back during her lunch break and tried to get me to come out and eat food, but I ignored her. I must have genuinely been asleep when Angela tried, because she insists she spent her entire lunch break trying to entice me to come out and share her ravioli. I didn't take the bait.

By late afternoon, I had used up all of my tears and about nine water bottles. I lay on my bed, looking at my ceiling, and wondering how my life got out of hand so quickly. When Alice came to the door again in the evening, I opened it long enough to tell her that I had taken off work for the week and not to worry about me. Then I closed the door, locked it, and got back to my pity party.

The next day was more of the same. Alice and Angela were right to worry. I used the bathroom at three in the morning so I wouldn't have to see them, standing under the hot water of the shower for almost an hour. Though I kept chugging water bottles I'd only eaten two more of the apples. Alice screamed through the door that I was starving myself and I knew she was right, but I didn't care. Even Jasper, who can usually talk anyone out of anything, couldn't make me want to leave my room.

"Bella, if you don't come out, we're going to do something drastic." This was their last-ditch attempt to pull me out, and even that didn't work. I ignored them, focusing instead on staring at the wall.

The next morning, I genuinely believed Angela and Alice had moved on with their lives. It made me happier, thinking that at least they could have happy, normal lives even if mine was insane. I was just about to sneak out to use the bathroom again when there was a knock on the door.

"To Alice, Angela, or Jasper I'm sorry. I really am. But I'm not coming out." I called.

"It's Edward. You don't have to come out, you just need to let me in."

"No." I said.

"Try again." Edward said.

"No!" I insisted, a bit louder. I heard the sound of wood scraping something, and I realized he'd slid down to sit in front of my door.

"You think I won't stay here until you come out or let me in, that's up to you." He told me.

"Fine." But suddenly, I had no idea what to do. With Edward sitting out there, all of a sudden crying seemed more dramatic than personal. I stared at the wall.

"If I'm out here for more than twenty-four hours I'm breaking the door down." He said it so matter-of-factly. His tone didn't shift at all. I ignored him.

The longer Edward stayed out there, the angrier I got at him. What right did he have to sit there like he cared about me? He was the one who'd given me the DNA test. That was his fault, and suddenly everything became his fault in my head. He was tied to every bad thing that had happened since my birthday.

Around four PM, the anger had grown bigger than I could contain. Then Edward lit the fuse.

"Are you ready to let me in yet? For someone who complained so much about wanting to be treated like an adult, you sure are acting like one huge, spoiled child right now." That was the flame. I threw the door open, pleased to see that he was still there for me to yell at.

"Let me have it." He said, as soon as he saw my face. I was too angry to wonder how he saw it coming.

"You have no right to be here!" I started with. He didn't say anything.

"No right! I don't care if they invited you here. If I'm the only one home then I get to determine who stays, and you are not welcome." He still didn't respond.

"You don't get to call me childish. Not when all of this comes back to you. If I hadn't met you I would be oblivious to all of this and now I have to deal with this whole situation too? I am not acting like a child. You are insensitive and, and, and" I lost steam a bit, but it didn't deter me.

"How dare you? How dare you bring all this bad news into my life and then just, just sit there and make demands? You brought all of this into my life. This is all because of you! I hate you!" I screamed.

"Do you feel better?" Edward asked. I looked up at him, making eye contact. His eyes stared right back at me, unwavering, green, and intense. He looked like he would eat me if he could, like he was looking at me but also through me. I took a deep breath, and then another one, all while he looked at me.

"Better?" He repeated again. I nodded, looking away from him.

"Let's go sit in your den." He said. Smoothly, as if I hadn't just yelled at him, Edward put an arm around my shoulders and guided me away from the safety of my room.

"Are you still angry?" Edward asked. I nodded.

"Let it out." He said. I shook my head.

"I'm not angry at you. Not really. I'm angry at Tanya. I'm so angry at her right now. But she's my mom. You know? But then, she's not. I can't wrap my head around that. I can't wrap my head around our entire relationship being a lie."

"The whole thing was a lie?"

"Well, I don't know. I don't know Edward. I want to believe that my mom loved me, but she's not even my mom. I need to stop calling her that. Tanya, Tanya, Tanya. I'm sorry I lashed out." Edward shook his head as soon as I started apologizing.

"I provoked you. Don't worry. I expected it. What we need now is a stronger way for you to deal with these emotions. Because I hate to be the bearer of bad news Bella, but it only gets more complicated from here." I looked at him.

"I'm sorry, but that's the truth. You're in for an emotional roller coaster, even if this somehow gets solved relatively quickly." I frowned, taking yet another deep breath.

"Thank you, Edward." I said, trying to put as much meaning into it as possible. Volunteering himself for me to scream at until I felt better was somewhat masochistic, but was undoubtedly one of the nicest things anyone had ever done for me.

"You're welcome." He said. "Do you have any questions for me?"

"What do you think I should do now?"

"Talk to the Swans. Bella that's your family. For me, I don't underestimate family. I think that you are both going through the same thing, and that if you can lean on them you'll be much happier in the end. I know how badly they want to get to know you."

We got silent for a while, as I really contemplated his words. I had never considered before that a positive test would mean that the Swans were my family, and would probably want to know me. It was a strange thought, and one that I didn't want to pursue. So, I asked a different question.

"How did you end up doing this? You're smart and from UPenn, you could do anything that you wanted.

"Exactly." He said, completely surprising me.

"What?"

"Exactly what you said. I can do anything I want, and what I want most in the world is to make sure that when it comes to their children's lives and families, I can do my part to bring people happy endings. I want to make sure that when people are looking for their missing children, they're working with the best."

"Wow." I said.

"What?"

"Nothing, never mind." I said. But inside I was starting to recognize that Edward was one of the most compassionate, kind people that I had ever known.


	14. Chapter 13

**A/N at the end this time. As usual, I don't own any of these characters or this world, just my plot!**

* * *

I took the rest of that awful week to refocus myself and make peace with what I knew. After all, there was no longer any room to escape it. The permanent truth of the matter was that the woman who had raised me for my entire life was not my mother. I now saw what Edward and the police had seen since the beginning.

All of a sudden, I was questioning things about my life that I had never before even thought to question. Everything seemed suspect. The fact that my mom had decided to leave to Mexico did seem suspicious. Still, as much as I was questioning everything, I was hesitant to lay any blame on my mother. It was true that she had appeared in Massachusetts with a baby that was not hers, but I was still looking for a way to find her innocent.

Maybe her cult stole babies and she was just trying to rescue me from that life. Maybe she had saved me from my kidnappers. Maybe she bought me off the street and decided to give me a better life. It just wasn't fathomable to me that my mother had kidnapped me, even if she lied about me being her biological daughter.

That Friday, I agreed to meet Edward. This time, instead of the station, he asked me to meet him in the Starbucks closest to my apartment building. We both ordered, and then we took a seat in the far back corner, away from the other patrons.

"Feeling any better?" He asked, as soon as we were situated. I shrugged.

"I don't feel worse." I said. He nodded.

"How did your talk with Alice and Angela go?" He asked. Before he had left my apartment, with a threat to break down my door for real if I ever did something like that again, he told me I had to apologize to Angela and Alice for scaring them. He told me that Alice had been crying on the phone when she and Angela had called him, because they were scared I was going to do something drastic or that I would starve to death.

"We talked. I apologized, and they said that I didn't need to apologize – that they were just worried about me. I tried to explain to them what was going on in my head. I think I was just trying to escape, or stay in that bubble long enough that nothing bad could ever happen to me again. I don't know if they got it, but I promised I'd never do something like that again, and I mean it."

I felt silly after my confession, but Edward smiled like it was amazing news.

"Good. I'm glad it went well. You deserve that. I was talking to my – uh – to someone and she reminded me again to remember the human aspect of this."

"Your girlfriend?" I asked, and it wasn't until the words left my mouth that I realized how badly I wanted to know. Then, I wondered if Edward was married. He laughed.

"I have not had the kind of life where I can date. The last time I had a girlfriend I was twenty-four. We broke up when I told her I wanted to start my own agency."

"You own an agency?" I asked. Edward sighed, and I couldn't tell whether it was stress or because I was being too nosy. Still, he answered.

"Kind of. Four years ago I thought it would be as simple as quitting my agency in Chicago and letting my reputation there speak for itself. But uh, it hasn't been that easy. Lately I've been pimping myself out to different police stations in Washington State, doing cases for them for a very reduced fee in order to build up my portfolio."

"That sounds like a lot of moving."

"It has its perks. My parents live right outside of Seattle now, so that's great." He looked at me sharply.

"That's enough about me. We're here to speak about you. And I wanted to say that, well, I'm aware that there is a lot on your plate. I don't want you to think that I don't understand how life-changing this is for you. I get it, and as much as I am going to see this case through until the end, I never want you to think that I'm ignoring the impact on your life." The lighthearted mood evaporated instantly. I was quiet for a bit, until I gave him a mumbled

"Thanks." I didn't know how else to react. That seemed to be good enough, because he continued.

"Okay, so last time we spoke officially I told you that I didn't know what the next steps were going to be."

"This is official?"

"Yes."

"Why didn't we meet in your office?"

"It's being painted. Bella, can we please focus?"

"Sorry. What color? No, sorry."

"Tan. But getting back to the next steps. Right now, I'm working on putting together a CSI team who's going to come with us to Massachusetts to examine that storage locker. But it's looking like I might have to find a team of Massachusetts CSI to do it instead. That's part one."

"Us?" I asked. Edward nodded.

"Yeah, that's why we need to talk about this. I know that this is probably not ideal for you with your job, but it's really important that you come with us. For one, if your mother has defected from the country this is legally your property, and we cannot encroach on your property without you being present because you are not under investigation. But also, I think for your peace of mind it's important for you to be there – even if all we find is some old furniture and children's toys." He finished, but I felt like there was something he wasn't saying. He looked above me, rather than meeting my eyes.

"Why do I feel like there's more?" I asked.

"Well, there's a lot we need to talk about. But one thing is your job. I know that you said it might be an issue for you to get time off. I don't want to tell you what to do, but I think you should talk to your boss as soon as you can. You took this week off, and that trip to Massachusetts will be at least four days. You should talk to her and look at your options."

Edward winced as he said the last part, and I understood what he was implying. I needed to consider whether this was the right time for me to have this job. It also explained his impromptu showing of support – he knew he's be asking me to quit work. I nodded.

"I can talk to Mary." I said. I didn't want to. I wanted to tell him to forget it, that it wasn't an option. But I realized that Edward was really trying. And, if he could try then I could, and would, have to try too.

"Okay, good." Edward said, and I was sure he looked relieved, relaxing back into his chair.

"Alright, the next thing. Yesterday I called Jane Denali, and she's going to be flying to Washington State in about two weeks."

"What!" My eyes widened and my mouth dropped open like a dead fish.

"Now that we have this DNA result, we need to begin to gather a profile on Tanya. We need to understand who she was and try to understand where she fits into the story of your kidnapping. Did she kidnap you herself? Did she know you were kidnapped? We need to be able to understand exactly what occurred and if there's more to the story."

"Why didn't she call me? What did she say?" I asked.

"She was very cooperative. She agreed to take extended time off work to be here indefinitely. I asked her not to contact you until she arrived, and I am going to ask you the same thing. In case anything occurs which further complicates this whole situation, we need to make sure that you weren't feeding her any information or vice versa."

"That's ridiculous! She's my Aunt!" I protested. Edward moved like he was going to put a hand on my arm, and then dropped it to the table at the last second.

"Bella, it's to protect both you and your Aunt. There is a lot of liability that you could both be under if one of you says the wrong thing, or if someone even has reason to think that you might have said something. I need you to tell me you can respect that." I frowned.

"Fine." I said. So far, the conversation had been one displeasing thing after another. Suddenly, I was very eager to leave.

"One more thing." Edward said. I huffed, I couldn't help it. I wondered if next he was going to tell me that I had to move out of my apartment and change my name as well.

"Would you be open to trying again, with meeting the Swans? Now that, well, now that everything is on the table?" I was so shocked I could only blink. It hadn't even occurred to me to want to see the Swans, even though it probably should have been my first thought considering they were my mother and my father and my sister.

"Will you be there?" I asked. Edward raised an eyebrow, looking shocked at the question.

"If you want me to be." He said, hesitantly. I nodded. He exhaled.

"Absolutely I'll be there. You can bring Alice or Angela if you want?" I was shaking my head before he even finished.

"No, I'd rather not. I just…" I tried, but I couldn't put what I was feeling into words.

"I'd just rather not." I finished somewhat lamely. Edward nodded.

"Well, that's it for me. They can do any day next week, it's up to you."

"How about Tuesday?" I said. At first, I wanted to say Monday. But then I remembered that I would probably be quitting my job on Monday. I didn't want to deal with two potentially terrible situations in one day.

"Tuesday at six?" He asked. I nodded. It wasn't like it mattered. I was about to be unemployed. The only positive was that I knew I had enough savings to keep paying rent and student loans for a least a few months until hopefully I everything would blow over and I could get another job.

"Is that everything?" I asked. Edward nodded.

"Alright, well, see you Tuesday." I said. Edward looked shocked, but I didn't know why. It wasn't like I had anything else to stick around for.

"Will we meet at your office?" I asked, as I stood.

"Yeah, it should be painted by then." I nodded, and smiled.

"Bye Edward." I said.

"Bye, Bella." I walked out and didn't look back.

The rest of the weekend, I brainstormed what I was going to say to Mary when I walked in. I planned to put in a day of work, and catch her right before I left to quit. I realized that the more professional thing to do would be to put in my two week notice, which I guessed was the reason Edward had set the time so late.

That day, I tried to be the best worker that I could be. I was efficient and focused, ignoring the urge to take a break online or chat with my co-workers. I was tempted, but I wanted to leave the best impression in case I needed a reference when it was time to get a new job. I had the brief hope that I could start over at the company when the time came, but I couldn't imagine that the company would hire me back just like that.

I had planned to walk into Mary's office confidently, and tell her that I was sorry but I needed to put in my two weeks' notice. However, as was the trend in my life, things didn't go the way I planned. Instead, she took one look at me, before I even said anything, and told me to have a seat.

"What happened?" She asked. I was going to avoid the question, but I realized that there was no need to. So I told her.

"I took a DNA test, and it's confirmed. Tanya Denali is not my mother. I'm kidnapped." Mary frowned, a sad compassionate look that made me feel better and worse at the same time.

"And now you've come in here to…" she trailed off and I realized that I was entirely transparent. Still, I sat up straight and tried not to sound miserable.

"I came in here to put in notice." I said. I couldn't say the word quit. It was too much. Mary shook her head, reaching out and grasping my hand over her desk. She gave me a sad smile.

"I'm not going to let you do that, Bella. I'm not going to let you be defeated by your circumstances."

"I don't have a choice. I'm going to have so many things that I have to do. I have to go cross-country for a few days, and who knows what else will come up and what I'll have to do." I said, frowning. I didn't dare hope; I wasn't going to set myself up for disappointment.

"Oh Bella, honey, of course you have a choice. The only time you don't have a choice in anything is if you tell yourself you don't have a choice. Give me a day to come up with a solution, okay? Go home, get a good night's sleep, and I'll talk to you at the end of the day tomorrow. If you don't like my solution, you can always put it in tomorrow. I won't stop you. But don't be defeated." Mary patted my hand soothingly. As she looked at me, I had to fight the urge to be excited. I decided that I would wait and see.

That's what I did. I didn't tell Alice and Angela about my decision to quit, so there was nothing new to tell them. They were already thrown off by my decision to meet with the Swans again alone. I knew if I told them I was quitting my job, they wouldn't understand.

The next morning was more of the same. I got to work on time, and put in another great day of work. I wasn't as laser-focused as the day before, but I was still working hard. By the time I moved in to Mary's office at the end of the day, I was prepared for the worst. I had accepted it.

"Have a seat, Bella." Mary said, as soon as she saw me outside her door. I walked in, taking a seat. It felt just like the day before, and I wondered what the point was of me having to wait an extra day. Then, Mary smiled.

"Do you know that you are consistently one of the best at your job on this floor?" Mary asked me. I was so surprised that I didn't answer, I just stared at her. I loved my job, but I never really compared myself with anyone to wonder if I was better or worse. I knew that Mary had been considering me for advancement, but I thought I was just getting to that place in my time at the company.

"It's funny, when I told my boss that he could be losing one of our best employees to a competitor due to an unfortunate private matter, he saw things my way. So, I was able to come to a deal. We're going to be shifting your projects a little bit, and putting you onto a take-home schedule. What this means is that whenever you'd like to start, you're going to be able to work from home. You can pick up a stack of projects from my office once a week, and drop off the previous week's work. If you're out of state, you can even send it by overnight mail. Now, what do you think?"

Surprisingly, I didn't cry. But, I knew my smile was going from ear to ear. It was the first good news I'd gotten in such a long time, it felt amazing. It was a sudden burst of happiness. I was going to be able to keep my job.

"Yes! Yes, absolutely! That sounds amazing! Thank you! Thank you so much!" I was practically vibrating in my seat with happiness. Mary smiled at me.

"I'm glad you're happy. See what can happen? Never give up on yourself Bella. You always have choices."

"Thank you." I said.

"Now, get going! If you keep putting in overtime I might change my mind about letting you leave the office!" I jumped out of my seat, still smiling.

"See you tomorrow!" I said, and it was the happiest I had ever been to have work.

I held on to that good mood when I drove to the police station. As usual, Edward was standing in front – even though I was ten minutes early. I parked and walked over to him.

"Are they here?" I asked.

"Nice to see you too." I didn't have time for Edward's sarcasm.

"I didn't have to quit my job!" I said, beaming. Edward looked at me like I had two heads.

"You were going to quit?!"

"I," I paused, frowning at him.

"Isn't that what we were talking about? Why are you so surprised?"

"When did we talk about you quitting? I would never tell someone to just quit their job. Is that what you thought I was saying on Friday? To quit?"

"Well, yeah."

"I, no. No, I would never want you to quit your job. If it came to that level we could have made it work."

"Well then, it's not a big deal I guess. I mean, I don't have to quit. Mary and I worked it out, she pulled some strings for me."

"Good." Edward was still recovering from his shock, as he opened the door.

"You're first this time. Do you want me to wait in my office with you, or to bring them in?" He asked.

"You can bring them. I'm fine." I said. I was. He nodded. We walked to his office in silence, and after he let me in he disappeared to wait for them and I looked around.

His office was much nicer. The tan made the room feel more lived in than the stark white walls from before. There was a picture of him in the UPenn stadium with a group of other, excited people. He looked a lot younger, his face softer, but his eyes were exactly the same. He also had more White Sox gear on the walls, and I had to guess that he was more of a baseball fan that I had first expected.

My thoughts were interrupted when the door opened, and then I was face to face with my sister. We stared at each other for a while, and then I shook myself out of it.

"Uh, hi." I said. As she walked in, Charlie and Renee arrived with Edward behind them.

"Hi, everyone." I said. I didn't know what to call them.

"Hi." Renee Swan was a beautiful woman. It was weird to think that I was descended from her. I caught myself wondering if I would look that young when I was her age. She looked even younger than Tanya, and I knew they had to be at least of comparable age, if she wasn't older.

"Everyone have a seat." I tried not to look too relieved when Edward took over. The seats in his office were arranged in somewhat of a circle, and I took the seat closest to the door. Edward sat next to me on my left, and Vanessa was on my right.

"Alright. So, this is going to be awkward. I think if we can all acknowledge that, it would be helpful." Edward said. I nodded reflexively, and so did everyone else. It was weird, and I decided not to think about it.

"Now, how about this. Why don't we go around and let everyone ask one question. I know everyone is going to have a lot of questions for each other, so let's get them answered. If you have anything you feel like you want to say, go ahead and say that too. But let's try to keep it to one question at a time. Bella, would you like to go first?" I swallowed hard, but I was alright. I didn't feel any of the panic I'd felt before, even if I felt a bit jittery.

"I just" I swallowed again. "I don't really have any questions. I guess, what do all of you do?" There was an awkward pause as they all looked between each other, trying to decide what to say. Then Charlie cleared his throat.

"I'm the Chief of Police in Forks, Washington. It's a pretty tiny town. When you," he cleared his throat "When everything happened, we decided to move. That's actually how I got the job." He didn't say anything else, he just looked to his wife. Renee sighed, then smiled.

"I teach kindergarten in Forks. It's actually, it took me a long time to feel comfortable in a school again. It was really hard to see other people with their children, even after we moved. Having Vanessa really helped. I don't think, I don't want it to sound like we replaced you. I'm sorry, I don't know how to talk about this." She looked so nervous, and I realized that as awkward as this was for me this must have been a thousand times worse for her and Charlie. So I gave her a small smile.

"Don't worry about how something sounds. Just say how you feel." I said. I didn't want them to hold something back just because they were scared of how I would feel. I wasn't selfish enough to think that the entire meeting was for me.

"Go ahead baby." Renee said, nodding to Vanessa. She smiled at me.

"I go to Wash-U." Clearly, Renee was the talkative one in the family.

"Alright, now do you have a question for Bella?" Immediately Vanessa and Charlie looked to Renee. If she noticed, she didn't react. She hesitated, but then asked

"What's your middle name?" Of all the things I thought she might ask me, that had been entirely unexpected.

"Sasha. After my grand" I stopped myself. "After Tanya's mother. She died when they were in their early twenties. Their dad, Vasily, died while they were in high school." I wasn't going to refer to Tanya as my mother in front of my biological mother. It felt wrong, and rude. It also felt like I was betraying my mother, but I thought I could live with that if it meant not hurting them. They'd been hurt enough.

"It was Marie. Isabella Marie." Renee said, and then she was tearing up. Vanessa moved to help her, but she held up a hand.

"I'm fine baby." She said, taking a minute to calm herself down. "I just, I wanted to know." She said. I nodded. I could understand that.

"Bella?" Edward nodded towards me.

"What's Forks like? Actually, what was it like growing up there Vanessa?" I turned and directed my question to her. She wrinkled her nose.

"Call me Nessie, please." Then she smiled. "I love Forks. I mean, it's home. It's all I've known, you know? I don't want to be insensitive or anything but mom and dad are great parents. And it's such a small town, you know everybody. I've always been the Chief's daughter, I've always had friends on the reservation. That's actually how I met my boyfriend, Jake. It rains all the time in Forks, the sun is almost never out for more than a few days in a row, but growing up in such a close-knit community was amazing." I nodded. I wasn't sure how to feel. I tried to picture that as my life, but I couldn't. But I was glad that she was happy.

"How was it growing up with Tanya?" Nessie asked, before Edward could even speak. Renee sucked in a breath, and Charlie looked like he was about to say something, but I rushed to speak.

"Honestly, I don't want to be insensitive either but I can't lie. Tanya was a great mom. She was always there for me, you know? I know it wasn't easy for her as a single mom, but she never made me feel like I was a burden. She always encouraged me to follow all of my dreams. Even now, even knowing what I know, I can't, I can't say anything else you know? She was. She was always just there for me."

The room was quiet after that. I stared at the floor, not wanting to see them get upset.

"I'm glad." Charlie said. I looked up at him quickly.

"No, I am. Renee and I never stopped hoping you were alive and happy out there somewhere Bella, even when we knew it was very unlikely. So hearing that you were looked after and happy after all these years, all I can be is glad that we found you." It was so simple, and he said it so matter-of-factly, that something shifted in me. I think I had been waiting for them to say something bad about Tanya, and to feel torn between defending her and admitting the truth. Hearing him say something different was really disarming.

From that point the conversation shifted into safer topics. I told them about Alice and Angela, about my college years, and about my job. They told me about life in Forks, about what they'd done in Seattle thus far, and Nessie told me a bit about her boyfriend. I told them about Mike, and all of them applauded me for getting him out of my life. Renee told me a story that Nessie had clearly heard one too many times, about an ex-boyfriend named Phil who wanted her to move all across the country with him as a sports reporter and broke up with her when she said she'd rather live in one place. I heard about Charlie and Renee's wedding, and about their day-to-day lives at their jobs. It was seven-thirty when we called it a night.

We didn't hug, or anything like that. But we all agreed that we wanted to talk more, and just keep talking. By the time we left, the awkwardness was mostly gone. For the first time in a long while, when I went home I had nothing to tell Alice and Angela but good news.

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**A/N: Super long chapter (for me at least) but really sets the groundwork for a few plot points that are coming up. I know a lot of you are waiting to find out what's going to happen with Tanya, and it looks like you're going to start getting some answers soon! **

**For those of you who want to know more about me as a writer, be sure to check out my fanfic blog! I just posted about 2 new story ideas, and I'd be curious to know who'd like to see a little Darkward in the future - I've never had an idea for a vamp story until now. **

**Anyways, hope you all enjoyed the update! Thanks as usual for all of the kindness in your favs, follows, and reviews. I especially love all the questions I've gotten! See you next Saturday! **


	15. Chapter 14

**A/N: Surprise! This week something incredible happened. Someone recommended this story (a real angel) and now so many of you have Favorited and followed not only the story but me, as an author! I am so incredibly touched, that I couldn't wait until Saturday to post. So there will be another post on Saturday, but I had to post something extra today! To everybody new, welcome and thank you so much for your support. To everybody who's been here for a while, thank you for continuing to follow this story and these characters, it means a lot to me. **

**That being said, please, please, please review! If every person following this reviewed, there'd be almost 300 reviews on this story. It would mean a lot to me to actually get that feedback from the people who are reading this! **

I don't own these characters or this world, just my plot!

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It was two weeks before I heard anything from Edward again. I'd thought about calling him myself, but I figured that if there was anything that I needed to know he'd keep me updated. Besides, I didn't need Alice bothering me any more than she already was.

When I had come back from the station to tell them about my good day, Alice had "casually" mentioned that if Edward and I were going to date we needed to communicate better. I told her that I had no idea what she was talking about, and I didn't. Yes, I realized that he was a very compassionate, caring person. It didn't mean that I liked him. Even if he was probably the most attractive man I had ever met. I told her all of this, and she just rolled her eyes at me. Even Angela telling her to back off had no effect. Thus, Edward and I had no correspondence until he called me as I was out the door for work.

"Hello? Bella!" His voice was sharp, urgent.

"Hi, Mary. I'm on my way." I said, as I grabbed my keys and my bag and walked out the door. Alice gave me a weird look, but I just kept moving. I didn't want to give her any ammo.

"Bella?" He sounded more concerned; I tried to go a little faster.

"Hold on one second." I said, as I made my way down the hall. Alice had notoriously good hearing when you didn't want her to. I considered myself safe when I started down the stairs.

"You're not in danger, are you?" He was on high alert.

"No, sorry. I uh, that was for Alice's benefit. Don't ask. What's going on?"

"We just made one of the biggest breakthroughs in this case. I'm really sorry to do this, but can you get here as soon as possible?" I stopped on the stairs.

"Wait, now?"

"I'm sorry Bella, but this is really big. I'm here with Renee and Charlie right now and we want you to know everything firsthand."

"Okay, give me like half an hour." I said.

I called Mary in the car on my way to the office.

"Hi Mary. Would it be possible for me to pick up my projects and take them home today?" I asked.

"Wow! Hi Isabella. Um, okay, that was the deal. Do you mind if I ask why? Are you set to leave?"

"Not quite yet." I said. "I would tell you more if I knew more, but we're both in the dark. I just know I need to come in to the station."

"Alright, well, your projects will be on your desk when you get here. I hope everything is alright."

"Thank you, Mary."

"Bye Bella."

"Bye." I hung up, and concentrated on driving as quickly as I could within the speed limit. I didn't want to get pulled over on my way to the station.

When I got to work, I pulled up in five minute parking, and I was truly in and out in five minutes, something I think was a personal record. I pulled into the parking lot of the station exactly thirty-three minutes after I'd ended Edward's call. To my surprise, he wasn't waiting for me outside. But I made my way back to his office.

When I opened the door, I was frozen in shock. Edward sat behind his desk, and Charlie and Renee sat in front of it. But they were not alone. Next to them, looking concerned, was my Aunt Jane.

"Bella!" She stood, just as I stepped forward, and then we were hugging.

"Oh my poor girl. Are you alright? Oh, Bella." She was patting my back and hugging me the way only she and Tanya knew how. It felt like the best hug I'd ever gotten. It wasn't until Edward cleared his throat that I even remembered where we were. I stepped back reluctantly, and Jane grabbed my hand as we took a seat in front of Edward's desk.

"What's going on?" I asked, looking between everyone. Edward pushed a folder towards me that was sitting in front of Charlie and Renee. In it, were pictures of Jane and Tanya in their mid-twenties.

"We figured out how Tanya, where she fits in all this." Renee said. I looked at her.

"You knew her?" I asked. That meant she wasn't innocent, I realized. I felt my mood sink.

"Thanks to Jane and these pictures. I remember when I met her." I couldn't read Renee's voice at all. She sounded almost detached.

"Right after you were born, we were in the grocery market in Pullman. A lot of people loved you when you were a baby. You were very cute, you had those big brown eyes just like Charlie, and they absolutely sparkled in the sun. She was so sad. She was with these people, they were all wearing these bright red clothes. Then she saw you and she absolutely lit up. I let, I let her hold you, and then they had to leave. Then," Renee broke off. Charlie moved like he was going to speak, but Renee shook her head.

"She came to the house. We were looking for a babysitter for you for when you reached six months and I went back to work. But you were just three months old. She came because she said she remembered you. Then barely a week later she called to tell me that her, uh, her coven leader decided they had to go back to Montana. That was it. She saw you twice." Renee looked lost, I realized. b

I breathed out hard, clutching Jane's hand tighter. I was surprised when she spoke up next.

"I never even knew Tanya went to Washington. She joined the cult right out of High School, they were recruiting girls in our area back then. I never knew the details, we stopped talking for a while. It got worse when I graduated and moved to Mass. Next thing I knew she was calling me telling me she had a child and needed to leave. I always assumed they knocked her up and she wanted out." Jane looked so sad, and so lost.

Charlie patted her on the shoulder, and then she lost it. Jane was crying, and I immediately put my arms around her. She cried into my shoulder.

"I'm sorry. I know this isn't about me and I am so sorry. But this is, this is awful." Jane cried.

"I'm so sorry." She said again, as she tried to pull herself together. Nobody spoke.

"Do you think you can tell her what you told us, about Massachusetts?" I glanced at Edward. His tone was so detached and professional, and so different from who he had been when I'd had a breakdown.

"Absolutely." If Jane noticed, she didn't say anything.

"Um, okay. Well, a lot of people who don't work in medicine don't know this, but you can get your child's information registered with the government at any time as long as you have their birth certificate. So she told them about the cult, and she brought a certificate of home birth, and that was that. So you have two birth certificates and two social security numbers."

"What does that mean, for me?" I looked straight to Edward. He sighed.

"Well, I know I'm going to sound like a broken record, but you've done nothing wrong Bella. So, you're going to have to go to make some decisions. What will probably happen is that your first social security number will be stricken, and you'll just keep the one that you know."

"Okay." I said. He still sounded so reserved. I got the feeling there was something else he wasn't saying, but I decided that I had to trust him.

"So, what happens now?" I asked. Jane sighed, but it was Edward who answered me.

"If Tanya comes back to the United States, she will be immediately arrested for your kidnapping. Either way there will be a trial, but her fleeing the country will be seen as an admittance of guilt. However, even with this coincidence there still isn't necessarily enough proof to say that she kidnapped you. A member of her cult could have kidnapped you, and she could have been trying to save you, or anything else."

I nodded. At that point, nobody needed to say anything. I knew that it was very unlikely that Tanya wouldn't be convicted, especially since she'd clearly fled the country.

"Anything else?" I asked, placing the emphasis on "anything." I looked straight at Edward.

"Can I have a minute with Bella alone please?" Edward sounded the most genuine I'd heard him sound since I walked in.

"Absolutely." "Sure." Jane and Charlie spoke at the same time, and then everyone awkwardly stood and walked out. When the door shut, I looked at Edward. I was going to say something to tell him off for being so weird, but then against my wishes I remembered what Alice had said.

"Can you explain why you were being so, not you?" I asked. Edward leaned back in his chair and sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. It was the first time I had seen him ever look visibly frustrated. Then he sat up, and just looked at me.

"You trust me, right?" He said. He sounded so vulnerable, it instantly put me on edge.

"Of course." I said, and I realized it was true.

"I don't want to offend you, but something about Jane rubs me the wrong way. I just feel like she didn't tell me the complete truth. I just want you to be careful, alright? I," he paused, and looked me in the eye.

"I really care about you Bella. I just don't want this to be any worse for you." I took a deep breath.

"Okay." I said, Alice's voice still ringing in my ears. And I was immediately happy that I did. Edward visibly relaxed, the tension literally melting from his shoulders. I realized how scared he must have been to say it, and I knew he did because he was looking out for me.

"Thank you, for telling me what you think." I said.

"But you're going to listen to me?" He leaned forward. I nodded. I didn't think I had anything to worry about from Jane. She was living in Massachusetts when I was born, and had never met me until Tanya moved with me. But, that didn't mean I had nothing to worry about in general, and I knew that too. Edward smiled, and stood.

"Let's go." I stood up with him. Edward surprised me with a hug, pulling me in close. It was almost embarrassing how much I needed it.

Later that night, Alice and Angela surprised me. When I was in the middle of working on a project, Angela came behind me and grabbed me around the middle while Alice took my stuff. They half-dragged me to my room and then Alice dumped some clothes on me.

"Change fast, Bella!" She winked at me, and then they were gone. The outfit was nice, but not super fancy. In other words, it gave me no clues.

"Are you ready to go?" Angela knocked on the door barely ten minutes later. I had just finished putting my hair up.

"Two seconds." I said, quickly sliding some bobby pins in and walking out.

"Let's go!" Alice handed me a purse, and then we were in Angela's car. To my surprise we ended up at a restaurant. I'd expected that they were taking me out, but it was nice. I was even more surprised when the waitress led us to a table, and there was Jane.

"Hi Bella." She smiled.

"I hope I'm not going to overwhelm you." She said. I shook my head.

"Of course not!" I protested. "How are you? How was your flight?" I asked.

"It was fine. I forgot how stressful the cross-country flight can be, but you know I made it work." Gone was her sadness from before. This was my Aunt: calm, cool, and way more collected than my mom could ever be, but just as loving. She put me at ease immediately, and I slid right in next to her.

"Alright, so I don't want to talk about what's going on any more." Jane said, shaking her head.

"Catch me up on what's going on your lives. Any new men Angela?" Though my friends didn't know my Aunt Jane as well as they knew my mother, they'd spoken to her enough to be comfortable with her. She always asked about our lives, she said it made her feel young.

"Angela has a boyfriend!" Alice exclaimed, sticking her tongue out playfully at Angela. Angela rolled her eyes.

"His name is Ben. And he's not, I mean, we haven't made it official yet. But he's really great." She was beaming again.

"Besides, I'm boring. Alice put the m word on the table with Jasper and Bella likes Edward."

"I do not!" I protested immediately, but I felt my face heating up and I knew what they were going to say.

"Aww, she's blushing." Jane smiled. "Well, I liked him. I approve. He seems like the type that will take care of you." Jane laughed. I was surprised, with how detached he'd been I wouldn't have thought that she'd like him.

"I don't like him." I said again, more firmly, and then I looked to Alice.

"Yeah, I think I'm wearing down Jasper's fear of marriage. He's the one for me. So I know he'll get there."

"That's beautiful, Alice." Jane leaned in, and placed a hand on Alice's shoulder.

"Have faith." She said, and then she winked.

"What about in your life, Jane?" Angela asked. She smiled.

"I've been dating guys here and there. But I think I resigned myself to a single life a long time ago."

"Alright!" Angela cheered. Jane smiled.

"Thanks for the support. Now, what about your work lives?"

As we continued speaking, I was able to relax more and more. I felt the tension of the day easing away from me. We ate, we chatted, and I had so much fun.

Later, in bed, I realized why. It was all so normal. I was eating a regular dinner with 3 of my favorite women in the world, having a regular conversation. I had missed that. So in a way, I'm really glad that in that moment I had no idea what was coming next.


	16. Chapter 15

**A/N: Thank you, as always, for joining me on this journey. And special thanks to everyone who favorites, follows, and reviews! On we go!**

**Unfortunately I do not own these characters or this world, just my plot. **

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I knew to expect a phone call from Edward soon, but I hadn't expected it the following morning. I was still sipping my morning coffee when he called. But at that point, it was almost expected that Edward would surprise me. I picked up immediately.

"Hey Edward."

"Bella, I hope you've packed your bags." Edward said. That was certainly a surprise.

"What?"

"I got the team. Half Seattle PD, half of a team over there. But we only have them for a week. We fly out on May 3rd and we'll be flying back on the 11th. Now I have something to talk to you about."

"Wait, stop. Can we talk about that first? The 3rd is in five days."

"I know. That's what it is. You knew this was coming, right?"

"I mean, yeah. I guess. So, May 3rd. Do I have to buy a flight?"

"Well, that's what I need to talk to you about. I don't think you should have to pay for this. But, the department doesn't entirely agree with me. So we came to a compromise, but I wanted to okay it with you."

"Uh, okay?" I said. I wasn't sure what that could mean.

"So, here's the thing. They bought our tickets, but they said everyone has to share hotel rooms, no individual rooms. And there's no female officers coming from the Seattle office. So, if you want I can give you the hotel name and you can book your own room. Or you can share…with me."

"Oh." I said, but my voice climbed several octaves and I knew that he knew that I was uncomfortable.

"I'm really sorry. We would have separate beds, so we wouldn't be sharing or anything. But the numbers just kind of worked out to be pretty even and they said they weren't going to pay for an extra room." I nodded.

"Well, alright. That's fine." I said. I was still a bit shrill, but I meant it.

"You don't want to book your own room?" He asked. I shook my head.

"No. I mean, we're both adults. I think we can handle it." That came out more confidently, even though internally I was just thinking about all of the ways things could easily go wrong.

"I agree." He said. "Our flight leaves at eleven."

"Alright, what do we do there for a week?" I asked.

"Well, we'll be going through your storage locker. You'll be asked to be available in case we need you to identify something or open anything else. If we get bogged down in something you might get a chance to see Massachusetts. Other than that, it's probably going to be pretty boring."

"Alright." I said. That was that. When I got home I kept doing work until Alice and Angela got home. I thought about telling them, but then I decided I'd tell them later.

That night, I dreamt about Edward for the first time, in about all of the ways you would expect. This may sound like a lie, but it was the first time I had even considered him in that way. I woke up feeling relaxed, horny, and guilty. I didn't tell Alice and Angela the next day either.

In fact, I was taking extra steps to avoid telling them. I was still having my morning coffee and getting ready every day, so they didn't know I was working from home. I don't know what would have happened, but what did happen is that Alice got sick. She came out with her nose running, her eyes watering, and sat next to me.

"Bella, when you leave can you grab some cough syrup for me?" She asked, before letting out the most disgusting hacking cough. I sighed.

"Working late?" She asked. "I can ask Angela."

"I'm not going to work." I said.

"Oh, you have a day off?" She asked. I sighed.

"I've been working from home." She frowned as soon as I spoke.

"Why?"

"Well, I'm leaving to go to Mass." I said. I expected Alice to take it badly, but I didn't expect what she did.

"Angela!" She yelled. Angela came running out of her room, towel still wrapped around her hair.

"Are you alright?" She asked. Alice shook her head.

"Bella has something she'd like to say." She said.

"I've been working from home." I explained to Angela.

"Yeah. Because?"

"Because I'm leaving to go to Massachusetts." I said.

"Which you didn't tell us because?"

"Edward and I are sharing a room."

"What!" Alice screamed so loudly that I thought for sure someone was going to come running.

"Okay, so that's why I didn't want to tell you." I said. Alice looked at me with wide eyes.

"Did you tell him you like him?" She asked.

"Alice, I don't like him." But as I spoke, I remembered my dream and I knew I was blushing.

"What happened?" Angela asked, seeing me turning red.

"I may have, in my sleep…" I started, but I didn't need to finish. Angela frowned and Alice's face lit up.

"I swear you like him. Why won't you just admit it?" Alice laughed. Angela rolled her eyes.

"I don't need to hear about this. I have to leave soon." The mood died a bit, and Alice looked put out. But as she walked away, Angela turned briefly.

"So just out of curiosity, do you think he sleeps naked?" I groaned.

Every day was more of the same, especially with Alice sick. I insisted that dream or not, I knew myself and I didn't have feelings for Edward. Even if I dreamt about him twice more. I argued that I knew when I liked Mike right away. Alice just argued that I didn't understand myself and that my "terrible" track record didn't count.

On May 3rd I met Edward and the other guys in the team at the gate. They were all really nice, funny guys, which made me feel a little better. It was weird seeing Edward in real life again, and I hated that he was even more attractive than my imagination. If he thought it was weird that I didn't sit next to him he didn't show it. He seemed much more relaxed than I had ever seen him, chilling with the guys. He spoke the most to a guy named Masen, the two of them seeming like old friends.

When we got on the plane it was me, Edward, and a man named Brady. I took the middle seat so that the guys didn't have to pretend to be nice, and then I immediately regretted it. Even with the armrest between us, I suddenly felt much too close to Edward.

"You alright Bella?" He leaned in to ask me, resting his hand on top of mine. Even though I was nervous because of him, his touch calmed me down.

"I'm fine." I said, looking over towards him. We made eye contact, and I felt myself blushing again. I broke our eye contact only to glance at his mouth, which was even worse. I made myself look away, smiling at the seat in front of me. I closed my eyes.

"I didn't sleep very well." I lied. "I think I'll try to make up some sleep on the flight."

"You're not scared of planes, are you?" He asked. His hand was still on top of mine, and he started to rub his fingers back and forth softly. It felt good, better than I wanted to admit.

"No." I said. He didn't need to know that this was the third flight I ever made in my life, not counting any flights I made before I could remember. The flight wasn't making me nervous.

"Well, alright. Here, I can move the armrest out of the way. You might sleep better that way. Brady, do you mind lifting yours up?"

Before I could protest, I felt both of them folding the armrests up, which only made things more complicated. I didn't want to scoot closer to Brady, who I didn't know, but I also didn't want to scoot over to Edward. With no armrests there was nothing marking my space. I didn't move.

By the time the plane actually took off, I realized that I was going to have a hard time falling asleep in that middle seat. But it was too late to do anything about it. I lay there with my eyes closed, until the flight attendant came by with the drink cart. I "got up" and asked for something, hoping it would give me something to do.

"Trouble sleeping?" Edward asked, giving me that same concerned face all furrowed eyebrows and frowning.

I shrugged. "I guess I'm not as tired as I thought," before taking a sip of my drink and looking past him out the window. We were set to arrive shortly after 7 their time, which I realized made sleeping a bad idea anyways.

"Also, since it'll be pretty late when we get there, maybe it's a good thing that I stay awake." He was looking at me strangely, but I ignored it. I pulled out my phone, put some headphones in, and pretended that was an interesting way to spend five hours.

Eventually, we did land. None of us has checked any bags, so we were good to go as soon as we stepped off the plane. The hotel had a shuttle, and we all piled into it with our luggage and were off.

I wondered why nobody was speaking to each other, and Edward explained that everyone was getting mentally ready for the next day. We'd be meeting the other team at breakfast the next morning and immediately going to the storage unit. Because I was coming, they didn't need a warrant to search the unit. Then I found out that the contents of my box were being moved to "a secure location" and that's where they'd be going through everything. It all sounded so dramatic.

When we got to the hotel, I was so tired that I honestly forgot for a second that Edward and I were sharing the room.

"Alright Mr. and Mrs. Delfiglio, you have a half-suite with two full beds, is that correct?" The woman at the counter asked, when Edward and I finally got to the front of the check-in line.

"What?" I said, and then I realized my mistake. Edward had told me that we'd be checking in under false names. Luckily, the woman behind the counter misinterpreted my reaction.

"I'm sorry m'am, did you two want me to move you to a room with a Queen? It would be a little pricier." I was blushing at my mistake, but this time I used it to my advantage, leaning in.

"No, that's fine. I didn't realize it would cost more." I said quietly, as if it was private. The woman frowned.

"I could have facilities come push your beds together. Or how about a room with one full? They have less of a view…" I shook my head.

"You know what. I'm going to enjoy the room that he booked us. And hey, two beds is just twice the fun, right?" I winked, took the room keys, and walked away before I could say anything else ridiculous.

Edward followed me, his expression once again difficult to read. I wanted to ask if that was a skill that they were taught or if he was just like that: good at making his face complacent and fairly emotionless. Then I decided I didn't want to know.

We walked to the room in complete silence. I let us in, and it was a nice room. I was half surprised that they didn't put us all up in a motel, but this was a fairly nice hotel. There were the two beds, and a clean bathroom, and even a little patio.

"What do you want to do for dinner?" Edward asked, as soon as we sat down.

"I'm not very hungry." I lied. "Plus, you probably want to catch up with your team, make sure everyone is ready for tomorrow."

"Bella, really, are you alright?" Edward took a few steps forward, so he was standing right in front of me. He was staring into my eyes like he was trying to see my thoughts. I smiled.

"I'm a little tired, maybe a little nervous for tomorrow, but other than that I really am fine." I said. It wasn't entirely a lie. I was nervous for the next day, just for more complicated reasons that I let on.

As soon as Edward left, I pulled out phone and did a google search. I do this really interesting thing that didn't make it into the movies, where I talk in my sleep. When I was younger, Tanya used to think it was adorable. When I got to college freshman year, my roommate used to try to get me to answer questions. Then, I got a single, and I haven't had a roommate since.

I don't do it every night. Sometimes I go months without doing it, but sometimes I'm talking every night. Mike used to think it was cute, mostly because I would say his name in the middle of the night. But I had no idea what I would say with Edward in the room. My recent trend of dreaming about him didn't help much either. If I woke up hot and sweaty after moaning in my sleep, my only other option was to pretend that I had the flu. If that combined with me saying anything about him, I knew I would never live it down.

Google wasn't helpful either. Every source kept saying that there was no cure other than a sleep study, which I didn't have time for. I took my phone with me in search of chicken nuggets again, and I continued to look everything up, with no solution. By the time I got back to the hotel, I didn't know what to do.

I walked in to Edward, shirtless, sitting on the bed by the windows with a laptop.

"You alright?" He asked, when he saw my shocked expression.

"Yup. I'm just going to get ready for bed." I said. I grabbed my bag and locked myself in the bathroom. Edward was much more attractive than he had any right to be. I just hoped that he'd missed me blushing. I took a long shower trying to relax myself, before putting on my pajamas. I checked from several angles to make sure that I was fully covered in my tank pajama set, before walking out.

"I'm going to turn in." I said, putting my bag down and jumping onto my bed. I moved over to the top to slide under the blankets.

"I think I'm going to take a shower and then join you. In going to sleep." Edward's voice was hoarse, and I wondered if he'd been hydrated enough on the plane.

"Goodnight, Edward." I sighed.

"Goodnight, Bella." He said. That was that.

The next morning, I woke up to Edward calling my name. He was already dressed in his button down and black slacks, looking like he was heading to the office. I tried to discretely make sure I was presentable before I sat up.

"Hey, I'm going to make a breakfast run for everyone. I'm probably going to do bagels, is there anything you want in particular?" He asked.

"Oh! Yes, I want a large iced caramel coffee from Dunks. Um, Dunkin Donuts. Please. Seriously I'll give you the cash myself. Everyone in Seattle drinks Starbucks but I miss Dunks. And if you go there for bagels they have great bagels and donuts." I smiled. He nodded.

"Alright, Dunkin Donuts works. I'll probably be back in twenty minutes, and we're going to eat on the go. Is that enough time?" Of course it wasn't.

"Sure." I said, instead. He didn't seem to be acting strangely, other than his professional Edward mode. But I had to know for sure.

"Hey, sometimes I talk in my sleep. I hope I didn't bother you…" I said. Edward shook his head.

"Nope. If you talked, I didn't notice." I smiled, relieved.

Somehow, I did manage to get ready in twenty minutes, and we left. We drove in two SUVs. I rode with Edward, Brady, and Masen. It was easy to see that they were Edward's friends, beyond just being coworkers. As they joked around, I read over Tanya's letter on my own for the first time, especially the part about the storage unit. With new understanding, it did seem suspicious. Everything seemed suspicious. I wondered what we'd find there.

The short answer is: a lot of stuff. Only Edward and Masen came up with me when I opened the unit, so we wouldn't seem weird. The storage unit was much bigger than I had expected. It had our two old couches stacked on top of each other, our old fridge, and just stacks and stacks of boxes. I moved to open one, but Edward asked that I didn't, so I stood back. Since nothing was overtly addressed to me, I stood back as they began loading up a cart with boxes.

I walked down with them, and then I became a kind of door person. I let people in and out as the men moved things back and forth. One of the women on the Mass team, Leah, was right in it with the guys. She looked like she could be a model, tall and thin with long, thick hair, but I could tell from her demeanor that she was a total tomboy. The other female officer, Kim, stayed and talked to me.

There were only five officers from the Mass team, and Kim confided in me that she'd had a crush on one of them, Jared, since she'd started in their office. She was a really easygoing, friendly person – which was somewhat of a contrast to Leah who'd barely looked at me as she shook my hand. Kim was pretty sure Jared liked Leah, apparently most of the guys in their office had a little thing for her, but Kim wasn't even upset about it. She was nice to talk to.

They got most of the things loaded up into everyone's cars on the first go. Kim offered to stay behind with me while they drove everything off to the secure location, but I told her not to worry about it. I unpacked my backpack and got started on my take-home work on my laptop. It was an hour before they got back, which wasn't a surprise. Even during the day, traffic in and out of the city could turn a twenty minute drive into a forty minute drive. An hour to get there, unload the stuff, and drive back was actually pretty quick.

When they came back in, they got the last few things. The Seattle team had only brought one car back, so I rode in the back with my stuff in the Mass car. I don't know what I expected, but the actual action of the police work was boring. The space looked like a giant empty warehouse, and there were tarps laid out over the entire floor. My boxes were spread out, and the team started sorting everything by what was in the boxes. Kim and Phil from Mass, and Seth and Brady from Seattle were the note takers. I sat in a chair in the corner doing work.

Halfway through the day, they sent me on a lunch run since I knew the area. Nobody had any allergies, so I picked up some Thai food from a cheap place by an apartment we'd lived in at one point, and brought it back. They at in shifts, two or three people eating at a time, carefully, in my little corner. In that way I got to chat with everyone at least a little bit.

Abruptly at five thirty they wrapped it up, and then Kim, Phil, Seth, and Brady began photographing everything to catalog what they'd done so far and how it all looked – in case anything happened. Then, they walked me though and asked me to see if anything stood out to me, but it all just looked like stuff.

After a dinner at a buffet diner, which I couldn't get out of, we went back to the room. I'd surprised myself which how much work I'd gotten done, so I decided I didn't need to do work that evening. Instead, Seth, Brady, and Masen infiltrated our room and we watched a movie. I fell asleep before it was even over.

The next three days were exactly the same. Despite the initial excitement over me sharing a room with Edward, it was pretty boring. He always had some of the guys over until I fell asleep, and when I woke up he'd be dressed and out the door. It almost felt like he was avoiding me, but I knew he was just trying to give me space.

The fifth day was the first time they found something interesting. Tanya had a box just full of old papers and letters. There was a letter in there that Tanya had written begging Jane to leave her job at the hospital and come to "the coven" with her. What this letter demonstrated, was that Jane had worked in the hospital in Montana that had later issued me a false birth certificate. It suggested that Tanya may have had a contact at the hospital through Jane.

I didn't understand why that was a big deal, but it was big enough that everyone was working with a new fervor. That day, someone said that there was way too much stuff Tanya's storage unit. We went and visited her apartment, where her landlord confirmed for me and Edward that she had moved out abruptly, three days after our second phone call. He said she'd sold the furniture to other tenants in the building, and we guessed that whatever she hadn't sold was what she'd left in the storage unit.

The next day, as they unpacked the final boxes, something caught my eye. Tanya had saved my graduation box. When I had graduated from middle school, I had to make a speech. I hated public speaking, and so she'd bought me a little box and told me to lock all of my worries and fears inside of it. I made it through the speech, and since then the box had always meant a lot to her.

"Can I see that?" I asked. It was a puzzle box, so even though it looked like it needed a key to open it you actually only needed to understand the puzzle. I worked quickly, moving the familiar pieces around until the box opened. Inside was a letter.

In it, Tanya made a complete confession. It was a handwritten apology to me, for taking me away from my parents. She wrote that she had seen me as a beacon of light in the darkest part of her life, and that she couldn't help needing to have me. She said that not being able to babysit for me because of her coven leader was what made her realize, finally, that she had lost control of her life. She said that I had saved her, and that she needed to have me because she knew that as long as she had me she could never be taken advantage of again.

The letter was vague about the mechanics, but it was a confession of guilt nonetheless. Everyone viewed it as a huge triumph, and I wasn't sure what to feel about it. She signed the letter by telling me how much she loved me and would miss me, and I cried. I cried because as much as I was scared of the situation, as much as I knew what she'd done was wrong, I missed my mother. Knowing how much I had meant to her, it was too difficult to process.

Edward immediately brought me back to the hotel, letting the team work without him. He sat with me on my bed as I cried, rubbing my back and telling me that everything was going to be alright. As we sat there, with him looking after me, I realized that Alice was right. I was ridiculous. I already couldn't picture my life without Edward in it, could not think of one person that I would rather have looking after me in that moment. It was inconvenient, and despite what Alice was thinking it wasn't a good thing, but it was true. I definitely, absolutely, had feelings for Edward.


	17. Chapter 16

**A/N: Hey guys! Sorry for the delay on this. Strange combination of internet issues and last night being a train wreck for me. But I'm here now, and excited to share more of this with you! Thank you to everyone who reads this story, especially for the favorites, follows, and reviews. You all make my day a little brighter. I've gotten a few reviews with people asking if I have Beta, and I don't. So, if anyone is interested and an actual Beta on this site - basically someone who can explain how this whole thing works - please let me know! **

**I don't own this world or these characters, but boy am I having fun with this plot! **

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That last day, it was rough saying goodbye to everyone. Thanks to me, there was official proof that Tanya had kidnapped me. After reading the letter, they contacted the hospital where Jane had once worked. They confirmed that Jane had been in Montana visiting old friends around the time that I was kidnapped, and that she had made a few trips to the hospital to visit with some of her old co-workers and some of her long-time patients. That, coupled with the letter, was enough to bring Jane into custody. When we flew back to Seattle, Jane would be questioned by Edward.

It was Kim's idea that we all go out to eat one last dinner together, as our flight was leaving at six the next morning. They took us to Bertucci's, one of my favorite restaurants, and they billed it as a work expense so everything was free. Everyone checked up on me in some way, though most of the men simply patted my back and told me I'd be alright. Only Edward was hovering, as he had been all day. Every so often we'd lock eyes and I knew he was trying to see if I was okay. It made me feel safer.

For most of the guys, I gave them a handshake or a hug and thanked them for helping. Leah was a handshake person, though she gave me the first smile I'd seen on her face all week. Kim was a hug person, and she added me on social media and told me to keep in touch. I wished her luck with Jared when he was out of earshot, and she playfully crossed her fingers and told me she needed all the luck she could get.

That night, I dreamt that I was introducing Edward to Tanya and Jane as my new boyfriend. Mom was impressed that he went to Penn, saying that he needed to be smart to date me. Jane congratulated him on our engagement, and suddenly we both had huge diamond rings. Then, Edward's ring started going off like a police siren, and he moved me behind his back.

"Tanya, Jane, you're under arrest. Bella's coming with me, forever."

"Edward, don't arrest them, they're my family!"

"What about us?" I turned and the Swans were there. Renee hugged Edward, and told him that he could marry me if he saved me. Nessie asked if he thought he was good enough to marry her sister.

"I want to leave." I told Edward, dream me seemingly very calm about the situation. He grabbed my hand, and then we just ran away until my family, both of them, faded out of sight. He kissed me, and it was just starting to get raunchier when I was jostled awake. Real Edward was standing over my bed, and I immediately knew why.

"What did I say?" I asked, hopping that I hadn't said anything embarrassing. It was still dark in the room, and I couldn't see his expression from where he stood. I knew he wouldn't be able to see my face either, so I let myself examine his body from where I lay. He really was beautiful, sculpted chest, toned arms, a flat, hard stomach with a just-visible six pack, and a muscled V peeking out over the band of his pajama pants.

"You kept saying my name. Then something about running. Then you screamed and that's why I woke you up." He said, his voice was scratchy and low with sleep, and it was incredibly sexy. Especially coming out of the dream that I'd been having.

"Sorry." I said, but my voice was all breathy which wasn't helping the situation at hand at all. Edward closed his eyes, and took a deep breath. I could see his ab muscles flexing as he breathed. It was all so distracting.

"Goodnight, Bella." He said, in that same, low tone. He abruptly turned and walked back over to his bed, and he lay down with his back to me. I wondered if he could feel the tension in the room, or if I had just pissed him off, but I couldn't exactly ask. Instead, I said nothing. If it happened again, he didn't wake me up.

It felt like I had just fallen asleep when Edward woke me up to go home. I had brought business clothes for my last day, because I knew I would be driving straight to the office to drop everything off. To my surprise, I had actually gotten through everything – even though Mary had expected it to keep me occupied for at least another few days as I got home. I'd called her the morning previous, and she told me to drop it off and enjoy a couple of free days before they'd have the next few things I needed to do.

That time, I actually was tired. Without even meaning too, there between Edward and Masen, I fell asleep. When I woke up, my head was on Edward's shoulder, and he'd slid his arm behind my back. I moved, and I felt him start to withdraw his arm, so I settled back down.

"Aw, you two are adorable." I heard a woman's voice, probably a flight attendant. I just kept my eyes closed.

"Aren't they?" Masen laughed. I don't know how Edward reacted, but he didn't say anything and I took that as a good sign.

At the airport, I hugged everyone on the team as I said goodbye. When I got to Masen and Edward, they were chatting.

"You still driving?" He asked, just as I walked up.

"I don't want to interrupt." I said, when they both looked at me. Masen rolled his eyes. He was pretty tall, a little taller than Edward, with light hazel eyes.

"You're not. Edward's too tired to drive and I'd rather make it back to our apartment in one piece. But he's too stubborn to admit it. You know how he is by now I'm sure, he's always got to be in charge." I tried not to laugh, but I couldn't help my small smile.

"You guys live together?" I asked, instead. Masen got a huge, mischievous smile on his face.

"Yeah. Ed didn't open up to you? He roped most of us into doing this with him as a favor. Of course, once we met you we understood why. You're great, definitely worth helping." He winked at Edward, who looked incredibly annoyed.

"He knows Brady from college, and he and Seth are gym buddies. Then Brady and Collin live together so Brady roped Collin in. Garrett just wanted to come, I guess."

"You guys were a great team, so he did a good job." I smiled at Masen.

"You can drive if you want to." Edward said out of the blue. Masen laughed, draping an arm over my shoulder.

"Don't be a stranger Bella. You're welcome over at our place any time, especially if Edward says you're not." I turned and hugged him, and he hugged me back. Then he took the keys from Edward and grabbed their bags.

"I'll meet you there." He said to Edward. As soon we made eye contact, I hugged him.

"I feel like I'm constantly thanking you, but I guess that's because you're always there for me. So thanks, I really appreciate that."

"I'm just doing my job, Bella." He said, a bit stiffly. I let him go immediately, but I tried to pretend that didn't hurt a bit.

"I know. But you're good at what you do." I smiled, and then I picked up my bag.

"I'm off, I'll see you when there's a new development." I said cheerily.

"Wait! I'll walk with you." Edward moved to take my bag, but I shook my head.

"You don't have to." I said. He smiled.

"We're going the same way. Besides, there's something I wanted to tell you." We started walking.

"The Swans had to go back. Vanessa is still around because she's in school, but the Swans went back to Forks. They were hoping you might want to come visit them."

"That would be fine." I said.

"Awesome, we can go this weekend." Edward said. I stopped moving.

"We?" I asked. He nodded, suddenly all lighthearted.

"It doesn't make sense for you to drive out there alone, especially since I know the way. We can leave Saturday morning." I thought back to Masen's words, and I knew there was no need to argue with him. It would be all semantics, because I knew he'd already decided that he was coming with me.

"Sure." We got into the elevator.

"What floor did you park on?"

"I'm on three."

"Mase and I were on two. But I can walk you –"

"Edward don't be ridiculous!" I said, a bit more sharply than I intended. I looked up and I could see him start to close off, and I sighed internally.

"See you bright and early on Saturday!" I beamed, as the elevator stopped at my floor.

"See you, Bella." He said.

When I got home, both of my girls were waiting for me. It was just past eight, on a Monday, but they looked wide awake and concerned.

"Edward called us." Alice explained as I gave them strange looks. Angela elbowed her, and then came forward and hugged me.

"How was your trip?" She asked, politely. Then when I didn't say anything, she sighed.

"Bella, all Edward said was that you might be stressed out when you got back. He didn't say what happened. But we'd like to know."

"My, Tanya definitely kidnapped me. And then there was something that means Aunt Jane might have falsified my birth certificate, so now she's in custody. And I don't know how I feel about it because I'm not happy but I feel so guilty being sad." Alice and Angela exchanged a look, and then Alice came up and slipped her arm through mine.

"Bella, we were thinking about it, and have you considered talking to someone? Like a professional?" I shook my head.

"I don't know if I'd feel comfortable talking to someone else about this, you know? I can barely handle talking to you guys and Mary."

"Think about it?" Angela said. I appreciated that they didn't push.

"I'm going to go drop off these files at work. But we should grab dinner out tonight, my treat, and I'll tell you guys how the week went. Sound good?" I said. They both agreed, giving me big hugs as we all went our separate ways.

After our talk, neither Angela nor Alice brought up me talking to a therapist again, but I knew they wanted to from the way they looked at me whenever I brought up anything I was feeling. I ended up caving on Thursday and seeking out more work, and took home another file of projects which I attacked immediately with gusto.

When I took a break, I decided that I had to go visit Jane. I knew she wouldn't want me to see her in jail, but I had to talk to her. To apologize.

Instead of behind a glass window, like I'd imagined, they let us sit together in a room with guards behind her. Jane's face lit up when we hugged, before we sat down. She still looked the same – long blonde hair that my mom was always a bit jealous of, bright eyes, sunny smile. We looked nothing alike, I realized briefly, but I couldn't dwell on that with her in the room.

"How are you doing?" I asked, wincing. I knew how she was doing, and I knew it wasn't exactly roses and sunshine for her. Still, she smiled.

"I have a good lawyer. Apparently your mother hired me one with some of her money, which I guess means she's not planning on coming back." She frowned and looked lost for a second, and then smiled again.

"Do you want updates on the case? Or do you want to not talk about that?" I looked at the clock. We only got twenty minutes.

"Have they told you what you're going to be charged with?" I asked, frowning. She sighed, her eyes sliding closed for the briefest of moments.

"Yes. I'm going to be charged with forging your birth certificate. And I recently found out that the prosecutor wants to put me on trial for the physical kidnapping as well. He thinks," And her mask crumpled. She was tearing up, and looking out the window not at me. I hated that I couldn't just give her a hug, but there were rules.

"I am so, so sorry." I said, and that made her look at me really quickly.

"Isabella, none of this is your fault. You were, and still are, the pride and joy of mine and Tanya's lives. Do you understand me? I would go to prison for the rest of my life for you." I looked in her eyes, and I saw that she meant it. She really meant it. It only made me feel guiltier. Still, I smiled for her.

I offered to help her post bail, but it had been set really high in case of her running like Tanya, and she told me not to worry about it. I told her about the fun parts of Mass, about Kim's crush on Jared and on being able to rib the Seattle gang for not loving Dunks coffee. The time ended all too soon, and before I knew it I was being escorted out as I promised that I would visit again soon.

When I got home, I cooked a huge dinner, which Jasper and Ben were invited to. Alice asked me why I hadn't invited Edward or Masen, but I just shrugged off the question. I had already admitted to her that I liked him, I wasn't going to admit what I secretly suspected. Based on the way he'd been acting, I was pretty sure Edward knew that I liked him. And he was not amused.

It made meeting him outside on Saturday weird. We left at nine so that we'd arrive around noon, just in time for lunch. A phone call from Renee let me know that I could look forward to a tour of Forks and LaPush, and then some fish fry for dinner. It was finals week for Nessie so she was staying on her campus, but Renee let me know that she would've come if she could've. I told her I understood.

The car ride with Edward was somewhat awkward. I tried to give him space by listening to music and looking out the window. He would try to start a conversation, but they fizzled quickly. Eventually, after we'd driven past the sign that announced "Forks, Washington" he turned to me one last time. It was raining pretty heavily by then, hard enough that I had to take my headphones out entirely to decipher what he was saying.

"Are you upset with me? You seem off. You can let me know if I'm still coming across badly."

"No! You're not." I insisted. Then I paused. "I'm just trying to psych myself up for this visit." I said, before putting my headphones back in. A bit of distance seemed better than putting either myself or Edward in an awkward position.

We pulled up in front of a small, brown house. It was nice, homey looking. It was bigger than anywhere I had ever lived with Tanya, but it wasn't by any means a mansion. Renee stood behind the screen.

"Come on in!" She welcomed us, waving us in. "Get out of the rain!" We did as we were told, running forward out of the rain into the house immediately.

"We'll see if it dies down before the tour." She said. "Charlie!" He came down the stairs quickly, and smiled when he saw me and Edward.

"Glad you're here." He said, and that was that. While we waited for the rain to die down, Renee showed us around the house. My favorite part was seeing Vanesaa's purple bedroom. I'd loved purple when I was little, and childhood me would have envied her room. Then, Renee showed Edward and me some pictures. She didn't show any pictures of me, even though I knew based on Nessie's albums she must have had at least an album full. Seeing Renee look so proudly through Nessie's albums made my heart hurt. She lit up when I told her things like that Nessie and I looked almost exactly alike from what I looked like at seven and her photos. I promised myself then that I would bring her copies of some of the pictures Tanya had sent me, as soon as I could get them from Edward's investigation.

We did take a tour of Forks, but by the time we got back it was absolutely pouring. Around six PM Charlie announced to us that there was no way that we'd be able to drive safely back to Seattle, and Edward agreed. They offered for us to stay with them, me in Vanessa's bedroom and Edward in the guest room. We agreed.

It was honestly a lot more fun than I had expected. Charlie and Renee were well balanced, where I could already see that she was a bit flighty and out there, he was calm and down to Earth. I could see myself in them, as much as that scared me. After the fish fry, which was way better than I had expected, we all just relaxed. Everyone turned in around ten.

That night, I had another dream. I was sitting on the couch next to Nessie watching TV. I somehow just knew that I was back in high school.

"Bella, you have to take this seriously, it's your senior year." I turned, and Renee stood behind me.

"Mom, I told you, I want to go to MIT."

"Oh, Bella that's so far. But alright."

"Where's Daddy?" Nessie asked.

"Scared to be a freshman, Nessie?" I asked her. She smiled.

"No way! Nobody is going to mess with me. Not when they know who my big sister is." She said, and then we both started laughing.

Charlie came down the stairs then, in full police uniform.

"See you after work girls." Nessie and I smiled at Renee.

Then, I woke up. Someone was knocking at the door.

"Bella, it's time to go." I immediately shot out of bed, throwing my hair up quickly in a bun and straightening out my clothes and the bed as fast as possible. I'd set the alarm on my phone for nine, but I remembered Edward had wanted to leave at eight.

Renee and Charlie saw us off with a scone each, which I devoured in the car to keep from having to talk. But eventually, Edward got it out of me.

"You alright? You sounded like you were tossing and turning in there." He said. I frowned. I didn't want to say it, but I knew I had to say it to someone.

"I feel really guilty. All of the time. Last night I dreamt that Charlie and Renee were always my parents, which is so messed up. I love Tanya. I know what she did is illegal and wrong, but she gave me the best life. And what did I do? I got arrested and now she's fled the country permanently, and my Aunt Jane who has fixed every cut, scrape, any injury I've ever had, is going to go to prison. It's my fault. And I'm just so tired of feeling like everything bad that has happened is my fault." I don't think Edward had been prepared for my speech. He took a very deep breath before saying

"Firstly, I want to say that you should not feel guilty. Bella, have you thought about seeing a therapist?"

"Why does everyone keep saying that?" Edward blinked in shock at my tone, and I tried to calm myself down a bit.

"I don't want to talk to some stranger." I said, in a more normal voice. Edward shook his head, never even taking his eyes off the road.

"Well, then who do you want to talk to. Someone who knows you? Your roommates seem like great women, but they know Tanya and Jane, they'll be just as conflicted as you. This is hardly something appropriate to speak to a work acquaintance about. It would be cruel to talk to the Swans about this. Who does that leave? I want to talk to you and help you Bella, but that's not what I am trained and qualified to do." He exhaled heavily, and I was surprised by how worked up he was getting. It seemed like he'd been waiting a while to say something.

"A therapist isn't a stranger. They're someone who is qualified and trained to help you. Bella I really hate how much this is weighing on you. I know you don't want to talk to me about it, and that's fine. I would never make you. And I can't make you talk to a therapist. But I really think that if you could you would find that it would help you make peace with this and at least understand your thoughts." I wanted to argue that it wasn't weighing on me, that I was handling it just fine. But then I thought about it from Edward's perspective.

Since Edward had known me I had blown up at him (though I still think it was somewhat deserved), had a panic attack, gotten in a fight with a roommate (which I wasn't sure he knew about), and locked myself in my room for days. And I hadn't spoken to him about my feelings, even though that had more to do with my feelings for him than my feelings on the case.

I looked at him. He was gripping the steering wheel so hard his knuckles were turning white. I realized that this was really important to him. I thought about Alice and Angela, and their concerned glances back and forth. I sighed.

"Okay."

"Really!" He turned so fast that I didn't know how he hadn't swung us off the road.

"I will meet with a therapist once. If I like it, I'll keep going. If I hate it, I won't. Is that fair?" I said.

"Great! That's great. I have a few people in mind." He paused, looking at me.

"I have a few people in mind if you want." He amended.

"That would be nice. Let me know." I said.

We didn't really speak much for the rest of the drive, but I felt much better. When he dropped me back off outside my apartment, I leaned in and hugged him before I could change my mind.

"Thank you so much, Edward." I said, softly. We made eye contact, and he gave me a brilliant smile.

"Thank you for listening to me, Bella."


	18. Chapter 17

**A/N: Super early post today because I'm off on a little weekend trip. Thank you, as always, to everyone who favs, follows, and reviews! Hope you all enjoy. **

**I do not own this world or these characters, just my plot :D**

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You know how they say things can always go from bad to worse?

With Edward busy on the case, tracking down a few leads that he'd gotten from the storage unit, he didn't have time to set up my appointment with a therapist quite yet. He also didn't have time to meet with me one on one, which I was both bummed about and thankful for. I wanted to see him, to be around him, as much as I could. But it was difficult once I realized that I had feelings for him. I didn't want to say anything, but every time he did something that was kind, or caring, it made me fall just a little bit more.

I was still working from home, mostly because it was easier for them to put my desk in storage than to have a desk that was unoccupied half the time. Mary told everyone that I was dealing with some personal issues but that I was still an employee, and to my surprise nobody pried. Some days I would hang out in the office for up to an hour, grabbing lunch with coworkers or getting updates on people's lives. Other days I was in and out in ten minutes.

Alice and Angela certainly didn't mind the change. I was cooking and cleaning more than ever. I had never really considered myself a domestic person. I learned how to cook well and clean well at a young age because when Tanya had to work a lot of jobs I wanted to make sure she didn't have to spend any extra effort cooking or cleaning. She always told me that I didn't have to, but I always responded that I wanted to. At home, this meant that most days I made some kind of elaborate dinner, and Jasper and Ben were always invited. Alice always tried to get me to invite Edward, threatening to do it herself, but for the most part things were just calm.

I also had more free time to keep up with Kim, and surprisingly, Masen. I became that person who posted pictures of food all over the internet, especially my Facebook and my Pinterest board of things I cooked and recipes I wanted to try. Kim would comment about flying to Seattle for dinner, and we chatted a few times about her slow progress on the Jared front. Masen liked every single food picture I posted on Facebook, and asked me when he was invited to dinner. Angela added him as well, just to be able to bother him about leaving her roommate alone and cooking his own dinner. She told me that I had to invite him, but I knew I couldn't invite him and not Edward.

All this to say, things were getting to a new semblance of normal. So when Alice called me in the middle of the day one day, I didn't think anything of it. I was working on a project, so I hit ignore. Then she called again. Worried she might be in trouble, I picked up.

"Alice, are you alright?" I asked.

"Bella! Bella oh my god, put on channel 5."

"Alice, I was working, I'm sure you can catch me up."

"Bella put on the television now!" Alice sounded nearly hysterical, so I put on channel 5. On screen, a blonde anchorwoman was speaking. They were showing a picture of a DNA strand, but I couldn't hear her. I raised the volume.

"…that fateful evening. DNA analysis has in fact confirmed, that she was their missing daughter. Now the twenty-three year old Isabella is caught in one of the most prolific kidnapping cases ever documented in United States history."

I watched in horror as one of my childhood pictures showed up onscreen.

"Accomplished student, college graduate, now residing in Seattle. Dan, what are the odds of all this?" The screen moved to a dark-skinned anchor, with gleaming white teeth.

"Well Barbara, I've got to tell you the odds are ridiculously low. You might be looking at one in a trillion odds. Now, the person who alerted the station didn't have a lot to say about Miss Isabella. But we do know some things which really make her case such a unique one. She was kidnapped as a baby, but due to her father's diligence her fingerprints were registered."

"That is true Dan, it is very important for people to do that for their kids. My sons are both registered, and after hearing this story I have never been more thankful."

"Oh absolutely Barbara. Not enough Americans are registering their kids. But that's just the tip of the iceberg. Isabella was kidnapped as a baby. Her kidnapper was in a cult when it happened, and the prosecution thinks she got her sister to do the legwork. Her sister was a nurse in the hospital where Isabella's false birth records came from, and using those records her kidnapper was able to get Isabella a new social security number. She might be the only person in the country who has two of those!"

"But what is really tragic is the way this all played out. Tanya raises Isabella to be clean as a whistle. By all accounts, she's had a good life. She graduated from MIT. She works somewhere in the city. In fact, it was a night of a little too much fun that had them brought in for disorderly conduct, which is how this whole thing started. And Dan, now Tanya's fled the country and left her little sister Jane to take the brunt of the fall. I mean, what do you make of this?"

"Oh I can't say Barbara. This case is too wild, if it hadn't come from such a reputable source, I almost wouldn't believe it. But our source, who wished to remain unidentified, felt that this is the kind of news that our network should be covering. For more on the Isabella kidnapping case, tune in at nine."

Just like that, they moved onto a fun piece about kittens as if my dirty laundry hadn't been aired on live television. I stared at the screen in shock.

"Bella?" I hadn't even realized Alice was still on the phone.

"This will blow over, right?" I asked Alice. She didn't say anything. We both knew what that meant.

Within 24 hours the piece had gone from being covered by one network to being covered by every local network. The day after the first piece had aired I had picked up enough work to last a week. I vowed not to leave the apartment.

Edward called me at the 48 hour mark, asking me if I had been approached yet. I told him that I hadn't left since I picked up my work, and he told me to ask Alice and Angela if they wanted an escort. I asked them, but they laughed it off, saying that nobody knew who they were. Within another 48 hours of that, the news had gone national. Even E! and TMZ had something to say about it. Then suddenly, the new focus was getting an interview with me. Whoever the secret source was had gone suddenly quiet, and it seemed like the news was searching through every person named Isabella.

Then, Channel 7 found out Jane's last name, and suddenly it was as simple as looking up Isabella Denali. And then everything really went to hell.

On Friday morning there was a knock on the door as all of us were getting ready. Angela looked through the peephole and turned suddenly.

"It's a camera!" She announced worriedly. None of us moved.

"What do we do?" Alice asked, just as the person knocked again.

"Isabella, is Isabella home? This is the Channel 5 news, we just want to talk to you really quickly, hear your side of the story. It's only a few questions."

"I'm calling Edward" I whisper-screamed, dialing him. He picked up on the second ring.

"What happened?" He asked.

"The news is outside my door!" I was really fighting to stay quiet, because all I wanted was to scream. I was extremely uncomfortable.

"Don't leave, none of you leave. Masen and I are on our way!" Edward said, sounding unusually frantic. He hung up.

"Edward said none of us should leave." I told the girls. Angela was looking out the window.

"Bella, come see this." She said. Alice and I both ran over to the window, peeking out. There were three news vans parked outside our building. Two frantic news people seemed to be pushing every button on the call box trying to get let in.

"Should I tell Edward to come in through the back?" I asked.

"He'll figure it out. I'm calling in sick." Angela said.

"Don't do that! Edward and Masen will get you guys out of here just fine." I said.

"We're not leaving you here by yourself, are you crazy?" Alice swatted my arm. "What if they come inside and you can't get them out, and you have to lock yourself in your room? What if they harass you until you say something you regret? Absolutely not." Alice insisted.

While they made their phone calls, I looked out the window. I was watching up until I heard more knocking.

"Bella, it's us!" Edward yelled through the door. Alice opened it, and Edward made a beeline straight towards me.

"Are you alright?" He asked, putting both hands on my shoulders and surveying me like he was going to see some sign of damage.

"He means all of you." I heard Masen say behind him, but I don't think Edward even heard that.

"I'm fine. We're all fine. Just a little freaked out." I said. It was weird, Edward seemed so tense that it was pushing me to feel calmer.

"I'm Masen." Masen said, with a pointed cough. Edward let go of me, and turned around.

"Sorry ladies. Alice, Angela, meet Masen. I've known him since I was eight and I just can't get rid of him."

"You followed me to Washington, Edward. Plus I was born first so you'll always be following me."

"I'm you 2.0" Edward responded, and I had a feeling they'd had this conversation a lot before. I smiled, it was nice to see Edward goof around, release some tension. I could tell that Masen was doing it on purpose to calm him down.

"Alright, so who's Alice and who's Angela?" Masen asked. Everybody got introduced to each other, and then we all sat down in the den.

"Who gets to be the bearer of bad news?" Masen asked Edward. Masen sat between Alice and Angela on the big couch, while Edward sat next to me on the loveseat. I definitely didn't mind how close he was. His being there was distracting me a bit, though with the craziness of everything going on it was definitely a welcome distraction. I told myself I was reacting that strongly because I hadn't spoken to him face to face in almost two weeks. Edward sighed, breaking me out of my thoughts.

"So, here's the deal. We can order the news stations not to come here, but that's just going to raise an issue because the tabloids are going to want pictures of you. We can remove Isabella from the apartment, but that puts the two of you at risk because people might become more desperate to get an interview with her if they never see you. So, what's best is if you all, temporarily, move out." The apartment got dead quiet. Then, my phone rang.

"It's Mary." I told everyone, before I picked it up.

"Hi Mary." I said.

"Well Bella, I guess the cat's out of the bag." Mary sighed.

"You mean the news?" I asked.

"Among other things. Apparently someone accosted Siobhan as she was getting out of her car and asked her what floor Isabella works on. Now, nobody can get into the building because it's private property, you know this. And I told the entire floor that if someone tells the news that you work on this floor they are immediately fired, to which I am glad to tell you there was a resounding round of applause. But Bella, I'm not sure it's safe for you to come in. Do you have anyone who can pick up and drop off your work for you?" I burst out laughing. Everyone stared at me in concern.

"Bella, Bella are you alright?" Mary asked over the phone.

"What is my life?" I said. "I can't be at home, I can't go to work, I have two mothers and two social security numbers. Okay, Mary, I'll work something out. I'll let you know. Thank you for looking out for me."

"Alright." She sounded reluctant to get off the phone, but she hung up.

"They're at your work?" Edward sounded much calmer than he had the first time.

"One problem at a time please? Edward, I have nowhere to live."

"Yeah, what do you mean move out?" Angela leaned forward. Masen took over.

"If these people keep showing up and harassing you ladies and you keep not speaking up, they'll just get hungrier. But if they keep showing up and they never see you, they'll just move on. They shouldn't harass anyone at work, especially since there are hundreds of employees in that building a lot of whom have never even met Bella, let alone know what floor she works on. But just in case Bella, I agree with what I assume your boss told you? You should avoid that building too."

"Let's start with Alice." I said. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat.

"Can I say something first? I know what everyone is thinking, that I'm going to go live with Jasper. But we could also just find a new place to live together, temporarily."

"That relies too much on the discretion of your temporary landlord." Masen shook his head.

"I can tell that the three of you are excellent friends. But you're going to have to split up. I'm assuming that Jasper is your boyfriend?"

"Yeah, I'll call him when this is over."

"Alright, so, Bella, Angela, who's next."

"Angela can live with Ben!" Alice perked up a bit. Both Angela and I stared at her.

"What?" "Uh, Alice…"

"Is Ben your boyfriend?" Masen asked.

"Yeah, but we just started dating. That's a bit, intense…" Angela said. I nodded, but Alice shook her head.

"It's not permanent Angela. This whole thing could blow over in like a month. I'll bet Ben would be willing to live with his beautiful, sexy girlfriend for a month. Plus you don't have to actually live together. You could stay at Ben's apartment and sleep on his couch. Or, well, he'd give you his bed and he'd probably sleep on the couch."

"Alice…"

"Call him Angela. Right now. The worst he could say is no." Then, moving so fast that I almost didn't see her move, Alice snatched Angela's phone from where it was sitting on the coffee table.

"You don't know my password."

"Please. Six Seven Two Five. Try harder, Angela." Alice scoffed as she scrolled through and dialed Ben's number.

"Hey Ben, it's Alice." That's when Angela grabbed her phone back, reaching over a bemused Masen, before standing up.

"Hey, no it's me now. Uh, so, everything hit the fan today with Bella and the news people and they're basically stalking our apartment."

"No, Ben no you don't have to come over here. What would you even do? Yeah that's why I called in today, your dad told you that?"

"Well actually there is something you can do to help, which is kind of why I'm calling. Uh, so we have to move out of the apartment for a while and…"

"Really? You don't mind? No, I mean yes of course I want to. I am not! Ben, oh God stop. No we are not." I had no idea what he was saying, but Angela's smile was absolutely glowing and it was great to see. Masen tapped her on the leg, and she seemed to come back to the present.

"Oh, uh hey Ben, I have to go. I'll call you later. Yes, I'm glad. Okay, okay bye Ben." Angela hung up the phone, and sat back down. She looked at Alice, who was giving her a knowing look, and rolled her eyes.

"I can stay with Ben." She smiled. Then everyone looked to me.

"The only person I can think to live with is Mike." I said, wincing.

"What?" "Bella are you crazy?" Edward cleared his throat.

"This is your ex-boyfriend Mike?" He asked. I nodded.

"I can't live with anyone from work, and I don't know anyone else well enough to live with them."

"Bella, the only way you'll even get to stay with Mike is if you beg him to take you back, and you know he'll make you beg. He's such a, a condescending dick. Let me talk to Jasper, I'm sure you could crash on his couch."

"Or Ben!" Angela jumped in.

"Guys, I'm not going to crash with you and your boyfriends. Besides, I know you don't like Mike but I'm sure he would be reasonable."

"I'd say you could stay with us Bella, but that would cross a line because we're working on your case. If only we knew some other people in the city." I glanced over at Masen, and he was staring Edward down hard core. I looked over at Edward, and I could literally see when the lightbulb went off in his head. His whole face lit up.

"You can stay with my parents! They have two guest bedrooms, you'd even have a choice. I know that they'd love to have you, hold on." And before I could blink, Edward was on the phone.

"Wait," I said, but he was already talking. I looked to Angela, who shrugged, and to Alice, who was giving me a thumbs up. Masen was hovering over Edward's shoulder.

"Hi, mom!" He called into the phone.

"It's your best bet, Bella. You are not, absolutely not, living with Michael Newton." Angela told me.

Done was done. Edward moved us all quickly. By the end of the day, we were all packed up. At around eight P.M. he and Masen began escorting us out one by one. Angela was first. He'd told Ben where to park to pick her up. I watched out the window, but just like I never saw Edward and Masen arrive I never saw them nor Angela as they left. Next was Alice, with both Masen and Edward dragging a suitcase for her in addition to the suitcase she was pulling. Then, it was me.

That was the day that I found out that my building had a service entrance, one I had never even seen before. We went out past a bunch of cleaning materials, and the door opened to an empty block. Masen and Edward brought me to Edward's car, and we all hopped in; I opted to sit in the back.

We drove for almost an hour. His parents technically lived right outside of Seattle, not in the city. Their house was beautiful, and huge considering they'd moved out here after Edward was already not living at home. He explained that his mom was an interior decorator, and had wanted the space to design a whole house.

The second we got to the door, it opened. A beautiful older woman, with caramel hair and warm, green eyes opened the door. She hugged Edward, hugged Masen, and then to my surprise pulled me into a hug.

"Bella, it is so nice to meet you." She held me out by my shoulders, just like Edward would, and looked over me. Then we were hugging again.

"Oh, I am so sorry about everything. But you are absolutely welcome here. Edward, Masen, bring her suitcases to the downstairs guest room."

"Come, have you had dinner?" She was just so nice. Despite myself I felt relaxed.

"My husband won't get back until late tonight, they had a meeting. I can throw something together."

"Actually, if you have some things I'd love to put something together for you. As a thank you."

"You don't have to do that, you're our guest."

"Let her cook, mom!" Masen yelled from upstairs. She looked at me, smiling.

"If you really want to." She said. I nodded. That's how my relationship with the Cullens began.

Masen was psyched that I finally cooked for him, and everyone, including Dr. Cullen, was raving. Dr. Cullen was just as attractive as his wife, his beautiful blonde hair peppered with streaks of gray at his temples. Edward and Masen spent the night, but they left the next morning and it was just me.

The next day I got up early and made breakfast for everyone, and then after they thanked me I retreated to my room. The room was beautiful, with a Queen bed and huge, fluffy throw pillows. I put my things away in the closet and got to work. I vowed that as long as I was infringing on Edward's space I would be the perfect guest: clean, helpful, and invisible as possible.


	19. Chapter 18

**A/N at the end. But I do not own this world or these characters, just my plot. **

* * *

We quickly worked out the logistics of my work situation. Edward and Masen volunteered to pick up and drop off my work projects. Edward drove my car over to his parents' house so that I could use it, though I was trying to avoid traveling to my neighborhood.

I also tried my hardest to be a great guest. I did even more cooking than I had been at home, making breakfast every morning and dinner if Esme was going to be at work late. I kept the kitchen as clean as possible, and if I had a little time I would sweep or dust the other communal areas of the house. She kept saying that I didn't have to do anything, but I just wanted to be positive that I wouldn't be a burden.

Even with the cooking and the cleaning, I had a lot of free time. With Angela's encouragement, I finally took myself to visit the Swans again. Without Edward it felt even more intimate. I begrudgingly had to admit that I liked them. Charlie was very mellow and not very talkative, but he was a really good listener and I could feel how much he cared. Renee was much more talkative, especially when she was nervous.

I also went to visit Nessie, who was staying in Seattle for an internship. That's how I found out that, like me, she was a business major. We talked about her coursework and her internship, and before I knew it we had spent three hours talking.

Three days later we got lunch together, and I found out that we both loved rainy days and rain boots. We both had ex-boyfriends named Mike, we both were unfortunate dancers, and we both were the "good girls" in high school albeit for very different reasons. It was a lot easier for me to relate to Nessie because there weren't any expectations between myself and Nessie. I knew she was my sister, but it was just like making a new friend. By the third time we hung out, this time getting dinner at her favorite Italian place, I felt like we'd known each other for years.

Amidst all this, Edward was checking in on me almost daily to make sure that I was alright, and when he couldn't talk he had Masen call me. In the first two weeks that I stayed at his parent's house, he came over four times. Granted, Esme told me that Edward always came by for Sunday dinner, but it was another thing entirely to see him on a Tuesday and a Friday.

On the third Sunday, Edward asked if he could talk to me. So, after we ate his mom's lasagna, we moved down to their den.

"Do you want good news first or bad news first?" Edward asked, once we sat down. He seemed unusually fidgety and I knew that the bad news was bad.

"What's the bad news?" I asked. He sighed.

"We found out who was leaking the information about you. It was a woman working for the prosecution. She's been fired, but unfortunately that just made her more vindictive and now she's released even more details about Tanya fleeing the country and about Jane and the press is back on the hunt. So it's….not going away."

"Oh." I said. Edward moved closer to me on the couch, putting his hand on my shoulder.

"I've already talked to Alice and Angela about it. They're doing okay. I just don't want you to feel like you're trapped."

"I don't know how I feel. It's just like every day there's something new and bigger and more disruptive. I haven't even seen my, seen Jane since I moved out. I don't know how much of this she's hearing and having to deal with. I feel bad that my roommates are kicked out of home because of me, Alice's mom is threatening to buy her a new place which is stressing her out. I met with the Swans again and I don't even know how I feel about that. I just kind of, I don't know." I said.

"Well then let's go to the good news. I found someone for you to talk to that I really think you'll like."

"Yeah, great." I said.

"Bella, I know that you're…reluctant to do this. But I think you're going to really like Kate. And she's excited to get to know you, because she thinks you're really strong for having to deal with this."

"Alright." I said. Edward looked a little disappointed by my lack of enthusiasm, so I tried to smile.

"Well, she wants to meet you this week. She's willing to clear her schedule for you. So when would you like to meet her?"

"Tomorrow." I said. Edward brightened up a bit.

"Really? I can call her right now." He leaned in even closer, and I lost my battle not to glance down at his mouth. I was still trying hard to get over my crush, but I knew I was fighting a losing battle. I made myself stand up, breaking out of his grasp and smiling.

"Awesome. Yeah, you go ahead and call her and I'll just, I'm going to go" Edward grabbed my hand, cutting me off.

"Bella, you don't have to meet with her tomorrow if you don't want to. I know that you're not fond of the idea."

"Edward, I want to meet with her. I really, really appreciate you setting it up for me." I sighed, but sat back down.

"You are like my rock in this whole thing, you know? I'm, I know we got off on the wrong foot, but you aren't overbearing, you're not pushing, you just care. And I really need that, and I really appreciate how much you've done to make sure that I'm okay. Even if it is your job. You're good at it."

"Bella…" Edward leaned in again, looking like he wanted to say something, but he didn't. He just stared at me looking somewhat pleased and somewhat guilty. For the first time, I felt like my internal turmoil might not be one sided. Then we heard a quiet gasp, and we turned to see Esme coming down the stairs.

"Sorry." She said, sounding incredibly apologetic. "I bumped my hip…" She said somewhat lamely. She was staring at us so intently it was hard to read. I looked at Edward, but he was staring at his mom with his blank, unemotional face again. She came the rest of the way down the stairs and sighed.

"Bella, I just came down here to ask you if you wanted me to put anything in the laundry for you?"

"Oh, no, I'm fine. I can do my own laundry if you just show me where it is. Actually, if you need to do something else with your time I wouldn't mind doing everyone's laundry. I have nothing but time." And I wanted to get away from Edward before I did something I regretted.

"Bella you don't have to do that." Esme sighed.

"That's fine!" I said. "I'll grab my things now!" I walked into my room, grabbing my laundry.

"Do you have everything in the laundry room?" I asked, as I came out with my hamper.

"Yes." Esme sighed again, looking resigned.

"Great!" I said, heading up the stairs, leaving Edward and Esme behind.

The next day, I was regretting my insistence on meeting with the therapist so immediately. I vividly remembered all of my reasons for not wanting to meet with a therapist. I was silent in the entire ride over with Edward. He dropped me off outside her building, and told me he'd see me when my appointment was over. While I was in there, he would be dropping off my work and picking up my new projects. I'd already gotten some Facebook messages from some of my co-workers about how attractive Edward was, but it didn't bother me. I knew that most of them would leave him alone, and if he did want to date one of my coworkers I couldn't exactly stop him.

That's what occupied my thoughts as I sat in the waiting room waiting for the woman behind the desk to call my name. When she finally did, at two exactly, I stood up.

"She's in the third office on the right. You're going to love Kate." The woman behind the desk smiled.

I walked down the hallway, wondering why it was so long. The third office on the right was clearly labeled: Katrina Eleazar. I knocked.

"Come on in, Bella." She called. I was startled by her informal tone, but I walked in. Kate was a lot younger than I had expected. I would guess that she was in her mid-thirties, and she was beautiful. She had long blonde hair and large, steel gray eyes. She was even dressed somewhat casually, a nice blouse paired with jeans. She was smiling as I walked in, standing with her hand outstretched.

"Hi! I'm Kate." I shook her hand. "I'm Bella." I said.

"Have a seat, Bella!" I did, and she sat down on the other side of her desk. She just looked at me for a few seconds, as if she was taking stock of me. She never stopped looking at me, and it was vaguely off-putting. Then she spoke out of the blue.

"Why did you come today? Please be honest, don't say what you think I want to hear." I couldn't help frowning.

"My friends think it will be good for me. They're concerned about me because they feel like, I don't know, like I don't have a good release for what I'm feeling."

"Do you disagree with them?" Kate asked.

"I'm not, I don't know. I mean, I guess not? But I'm not sure how this is going to help. No offense. I'm sure you're good at your job." To my surprise, Kate laughed.

"Well, that's easy enough. How about this. Don't worry about whether or not this is going to help. Let's just have a conversation, can we do that?"

"Alright." I said I wasn't going to say no; it would make for a very awkward hour.

"What are you doing at work?" I blinked at her. I hadn't expected the question.

"Well, I'm actually working more effectively now that I'm working from home. I've been handling some minor account work for sets of different clients. Right now isn't a very busy season for us so I'm mostly fact-checking accounts, and second-checking the numbers. It's actually pretty fun, because most of it is basic calculations but whenever I find an error I get to re-do the entire report until I find out what caused it, which is great practice for if I get promoted."

"How long have you been working there?"

"I've been here for about a year and a half, almost two. I really love it!"

"That's good. I'm glad you like your job. How has that changed since this whole thing began?" Kate sounded genuinely curious.

"I used to work in the office. My boss Mary has actually been really good about this whole thing. She was the first person I told besides my roommates, and she's been really accommodating. But still, sometimes I miss the office even if I do work from home. Especially now, because of all this stupid press I can't even go in once a week and say hi."

"Is that what you miss most?"

"I miss things being normal. I like normal. I liked just being able to go in to work and chat over lunch and do my work and go home to my apartment where I lived with my roommates and call my mother on the phone when I needed her. It's not, it's not fair." I said. Kate nodded, and I prepared myself for her to give me advice. Instead, she changed the subject.

"Tell me about your friends that wanted you to come here."

"That's my roommates and Edward."

"Tell me about them."

"Okay, well Alice is really short and Angela is really tall and I'm in the middle so we always say that we're something for everyone. I think that would describe our personalities too. Alice is really bubbly and she can be kind of in your face, but you know she means well. She gives really good advice and she is such an optimist it's crazy. Then Angela is way more laid back than Alice, kind of a tomboy a little bit. But she cares too, just in a different way. She's more likely to take action, and tell you the truth even when you don't want to hear it. And when they agree on something you know that it's important, which is why I'm here."

"So what about Edward?" Kate asked. I bit my lip. I didn't want to talk about him in case she could tell I liked him. That felt way too personal. Instead, I tried to keep it general.

"I don't know if it's weird that I consider him a friend, but I do. You know, he's been really helpful throughout this whole thing. He's good at his job."

"That's why you're friends?" Kate asked. I nodded.

"Why did Alice think you should come here?"

"It's a lot of things I think I did." I said. "I think I've been freaking them out."

"Like what? If you feel comfortable talking about it." Kate said. I looked at her, and she really seemed to mean it. She seemed like if I said I felt uncomfortable we would change the subject. So I kept going.

"I've been kind of a mess. I had a panic attack which has never happened to me before. I know I've had a short fuse, and I freaked out on Angela when she told me to consider the truth. I don't know. I feel like I don't know how I'm supposed to deal with all of this. It's just like another blow every single day."

"What are some of the blows?"

"Since the first thing with my fingerprints. Finding out they were a match. Seeing the Swans and realizing that they were my real family. Realizing my mom kidnapped me. Then I had Jane in my corner, and now she's under arrest for all of these things. And I know that I should be glad that someone who does something illegal is punished but all they ever did was love me my whole life. But I like the Swans. And then I feel like that's a betrayal to my mom. But Tanya's not my mom. And then this whole thing with the press. I can't go home and I can't be at work and I can't handle it. I can't, it's too much too fast."

I didn't even realize I felt like that until I said it out loud. Kate nodded, looking at me.

"What have you done to deal with that?"

"Nothing? I didn't even know, I've never been able to say it like that."

"Okay, well, do you think that might be part of why you feel overwhelmed?"

"That's the word. Overwhelmed. This is so overwhelming. And yeah, I feel like I don't have a second to even take a breath sometimes."

"What do you think you could do to take a breath?"

"I wish I could just get away from it. Honestly. And I think a small part of me thought that maybe living at Edward's parents' house I might be able to, but I don't feel at home there."

"Why do you think that is?"

"I can't believe they would just take a stranger into their home, just because Edward asked them to. And I think that they must love him a lot for them to do that. But I feel like I have to thank them because it's not their fault that my life went to hell. And, I don't know, I don't know what else."

"Okay. Let's talk about that overwhelmed feeling. Since you can't escape, what else might make you feel less overwhelmed?"

"I don't know. I miss being able to just go do little stuff."

"You know Bella, I don't think the press are coming the streets of Seattle."

"What does that mean?"

"Have you ever considered doing those things that you miss somewhere else in the city, or in other areas of Washington?"

"Well, no." I said, but as I thought about it I didn't see why not. Nobody was looking for me where the Cullens lived. I could have been going grocery shopping, or walking around, but instead I had trapped myself in the house.

"I guess I could be getting out more. But I never, I guess I didn't consider that."

"What else do you like to do to unwind?"

"I miss building things. In college I built a bike by hand. And I once helped an ex build a motorcycle. I think maybe I'd like to do something like that. And I once said I'd give my truck a new engine, maybe I could do that."

"That's, unique. I'll be honest, I wasn't expecting that. But it sounds like fun." Kate laughed a bit.

"I know it sounds like a strange habit, but I got into it at MIT and it's fun. And I think, I think that I need to have fun."

"Hey Bella." Kate leaned forward, smiling at me.

"I know, and I can tell that the past few months have been hard on you. Because they would be hard on anyone. But you absolutely can and should be doing things that make you happy. So I'm glad you figured that out."

I looked at Kate, and paused. I felt so relaxed, and I didn't know the last time I'd felt like that.

"You're really different than I'd expected." I said. "This, I mean, this was really helpful."

"I'm glad."

So, Kate and I kept talking. She just kept asking me questions, letting me get deeper and deeper into my problems. But it was somehow really cathartic. All I had to do was talk. And when I said something that was really bad, something that I didn't know how to deal with it, she always made the solution seem simple. Before I knew it, our hour was up.

"Bella, before you go, can you write down three things that you want to do this week? They can be as simple or as complex as you want. That's it. I hope, you will make an appointment to see me again when you leave. But I won't be offended if you don't. Either way, put your three things somewhere visible and try to achieve all of them. In a week, just ask yourself if it made a difference."

"Alright." I said. "I can do that." And I did. And on my way out, I made that appointment.

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**A/N: Two things. 1. I'm sorry that it wasn't Mike who blabbed, or Tanya, or any of your other theories. But I really enjoyed reading them! And honestly, it got me thinking about some things...**

**2\. I am so happy you get to see Kate! I feel like I've read very few stories, fanfic or not, where a therapist is a real character, but I love Kate and I hope you'll all love seeing their dynamic. **

**That's it! Hope you enjoyed. And I hope you don't hate me for that E/B _almost_ moment that I snuck in there - but I can't make it that easy! See you next Saturday. **


	20. Chapter 19

**A/N: I'm sorry if there are more issues than usual, going through a bit of a rough spot. Still, I hope you enjoy! As usual thank you to all of you for all of your kind words, favorites, and support :D **

**I do not own this world or these characters just my plot. **

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Although I'd wanted to add renovating my engine to my list, Kate had encouraged me to start small. So, the next morning I got up, got in my car, and went grocery shopping. By now, you all know how much I love to cook. So it should be no surprise that grocery shopping is my favorite kind of shopping. Armed with a recipe that I wanted to try, I visited the three nearest grocery stores to the Cullen home.

I was so genuinely excited to try cooking something new for fun that I took over the whole kitchen. I started cooking in the early afternoon, and I was just putting the finishing touches on everything by the time Esme got home. I had figured out by then that Carlisle had to work late typically on Wednesdays and Fridays. So I thought she might like to try what I made. What I hadn't expected was for Esme to come into the kitchen, see me, and sigh. I instantly felt guilty, wondering if I'd taken up too much space.

"What are we having for lunch?" She asked. I frowned.

"You don't have to if you don't want to. I just, I wanted to try out something new. I really like to cook but it's been a while since I cooked something just for the fun of it just for me."

"That's why you did this?" Esme asked, head tilted.

"Yeah. I'm sorry to take over your kitchen, but…" I stopped talking when Esme started shaking her head.

"What are we having?" She asked again, this time with a small smile. As I explained to her what I'd made, I fixed her plate and mine.

"Bella, can we talk?" She asked. I nodded, and made to go start cleaning up the kitchen. Esme stopped me by placing a hand on my shoulder, and nodding to the table. So I sat, trying not to think of how the grease would dry and dirty up her kitchen.

"Bella, do you feel uncomfortable here?" Esme asked. I didn't know how to answer her question.

"You and Carlisle are great hosts. I'm sorry if I seem unappreciative." I said. Esme gave me a wry smile.

"That's just it Bella. You're so appreciative. I feel like every time I see you, you're cooking or cleaning or doing our laundry. Bella, you understand that we don't expect that of you right? Neither me, Carlisle, nor Edward would ever expect you to do that for us."

"I just, really appreciate you taking me in. I mean, you did that based off of Edward's word. For all you knew I could be bratty, or emotionally unstable, and you just made me welcome. I feel like I'm intruding." I tried to laugh it off, but I knew Esme saw through it. She sighed.

"Come with me. Bring your plate, come." She stood with her plate, and I followed her into the den.

"Have a seat." She said. I sat on the couch. She put her plate on an end table, and grabbed a photo album bringing it over. She opened it up, and there was baby Edward. He was blonde as a baby, and his eyes were closer to Carlisle's blue than Esme's green. Esme smoothed her hand over the page, and then she turned to me with a small smile.

"Bella, when Edward told us the first time what you were going through, I couldn't imagine that. I told him to let me know if there was anything that I could do to make this easier for you, to tell me. And he did. But Bella, I don't want you to feel like you have to earn your place here, or like we're doing you a favor. Carlisle and I want you to be here, and we want you to feel like this is somewhere that you can feel safe and cared for. I know it's not your home, but you're walking on eggshells like you don't belong and I just want you to know that you do. You're not going to scare us out of letting you stay here. You're not taking advantage of us. You're not unwelcome, or unwanted. We want you to make yourself comfortable."

"Okay." I said. Esme turned back to the book. I sat with Esme, as she flipped through literally almost one hundred pictures of Edward in that album alone. Every single one had a story, and she remembered every single one. Esme almost forced me to let her in, but when I did I found that I really liked her. I could definitely see where Edward got his compassion from.

After that meal, I did try to be more involved in their family dynamic and I stopped trying as hard. I still cooked breakfast in the mornings for something to do, but I left it buffet style for people to pick what they wanted. When I ate other meals with Carlisle and Esme, I actually had more than just a polite conversation. I talked to them about what Kate had told me to do, and Esme actually helped me do the second thing on my list which was to see a movie.

It was weird going out to the movies with Edward's mother, but she made it feel less awkward. When the girl behind the ticket counter mistook her for my mother she winked at me and we laughed about it in line for concessions. She didn't care that I got chicken tenders instead of popcorn, and we laughed at all of the same parts of the movie. It felt like something I would have done with Tanya, but couldn't yet see myself doing with Renee. It was nice.

In order to work with my hands, I'd decided to begin by fixing up an old bicycle. On his day off, Carlisle helped me find a bike store that sold parts, and even had a few bikes in need of serious repair. We bought the necessary stuff and I finished the first round of serous repairs over the first three days. Every night Carlisle came home, he asked me about my progress with the bike and then would take a look at it, even if he got home really late.

Throughout all of that Edward was checking in. He called me the first five days after my appointment with Kate to ask how I was feeling, check in on my progress with the list, and just to talk. When I told him I'd seen his baby pictures I could tell he was embarrassed by how long he was silent and how many times he had to clear his throat before talking. He didn't talk about the case, which I appreciated, and instead we would talk about his college days versus mine, random hobbies, and the state of his parents.

Angela and Alice were both happily settled in, too. Alice and Jasper were, according to Angela who saw them more frequently, nauseating now that they lived together. Angela, according to Alice, was really and truly falling hard for Ben. After talking to Kate, I tried to really internalize the positives in their lives, instead of immediately looking for a negative. It was very freeing.

Exactly one week from the first appointment, I had a second appointment with Kate. That time, I was more prepared for what to expect. I walked in, ready to let her know about my week and the progress I'd made. I walked right in, and Kate was smiling just as brightly as the week before.

"You look a lot happier!" She greeted me. I smiled.

"I feel a lot happier." I said.

"Good. I'm glad. What's going on?'

"I got everything done on my list. Everything. I went grocery shopping and I made the best authentic French breakfast you have ever had. It was amazing! I went to the movies with Esme too. We actually had this really good talk and I feel a lot more comfortable now. I even got to work on the bike with Carlisle."

"How do you think getting closer to Edward's family is going to affect your relationships with your biological parents?" I was floored.

"Uh," I said. Kate paused, looking at me, waiting for me to say something.

"I'm not, I didn't think of it like that." I said.

"I know that was probably a push. I don't want to stop your progress or your happiness at all Bella. But I want to make sure that you're not evading your life, just taking control of it. We'll come back to that. How has work been this week?"

"I thought I wouldn't be as productive as I have been. But I'm still getting a lot done. I just feel, I don't know, more in control?"

"You know Bella, that's really good. I'm glad." We talked about the good in my life a little bit longer. Then, Kate steered the conversation back to what she'd said before.

"Can we revisit your relationship with the Cullens?" I sighed.

"I don't, it was nice to be part of a family dynamic."

"Do you feel like you can't do that with the Swans?"

"It's not that I can't do that. It's just, I don't know. I feel so bad for them. And there's still a lot of, I feel really guilty still. I want to like them but then I feel like I'm betraying Tanya and Jane. And even right now I feel like I'm betraying them by not saying my mom and my aunt but I know that I shouldn't because they're not."

"Okay, first of all Bella. You can call them whatever you want. There is no should, or shouldn't in your situation. You're not doing anything right or wrong."

"Then that makes me feel guilty about the Swans. I hate that I can't think of Renee as my mother or Charlie as my dad. I mean, I never even had a dad. Now suddenly there's this man and I don't even know how to build that relationship. And then this week with the Cullens…" I didn't want to finish. I should have known that Kate would press.

"Did something happen this week? You don't have to say it, remember, we can change the subject at any time."

"This week I was thinking about how Esme's life would have been if someone had taken Edward. She has stacks of photo albums of him. Edward might actually be the love of her life, not in a creepy way but just, she really loves her son. And Carlisle, just in the way he talks about Edward. They're just such loving people. And sometimes when I'm with them I think of how absolutely life-ending it would be for them if Edward went missing, even now."

"Have you talked about this with the Swans?" Kate asked, leaning forward. She spoke so softly I almost didn't hear the question.

"No. We never bring it up. We act like we're strangers and we never talk about anything except the present and the future."

"Is that something you want to change?"

"No? Yes? I don't know. I know it's going to hurt. I don't know if I can talk about that with them. I don't know if I can talk about her with them, not even Jane. I visit Jane and we don't talk about them even though she knows it's all out in the open. And I visit the Swans and we don't talk about Jane in prison, or my, or Tanya being on the loose. But I feel like it's on me. Like they're waiting for me to bring it up. And I can't bring it up. I just can't."

"Do you know why you feel like that?"

"No."

"Alright." And that was that. We moved on to a new topic. When I left, instead of giving me a new list of three things, Kate just told me to make sure I wasn't trying to swing too far in the opposite direction and escape the real world. I didn't feel as optimistic as the first time, but I still made another appointment.

That Sunday, Edward brought Masen along for the Sunday brunch. Masen was very present and goofy as usual, but Edward was distant and not very present. Every so often he would check his phone, and he was so fidgety that his mother asked him if he needed to leave. He insisted that he didn't, but his behavior didn't stop.

I figured that he would want to talk to me, that I had more bad news coming, but to my surprise he wanted to talk to Esme. Instead, it was Masen who came down to chill with me. For nothing else to do I put on the television. He'd called to check up on me the day before, so he was pretty caught up. I was surprised when he turned to me suddenly.

"What do you think of Edward?" He asked, head tilted. He looked more serious than I was used to Masen being.

"I think he's a really great person. Very caring and really intelligent. Uh," I was trying not to gush, so I stopped myself.

"That's it?" Masen asked, eyes narrowed.

"I mean, he's really dedicated. He's very take-charge and he's a good listener. And he can be a very calming presence." Masen nodded.

"You don't think he's overbearing?" He asked. I shrugged.

"He cares. He can be kind of a lot sometimes, but from that first day I confronted him he's done his best to make me feel, I don't know, better. That says a lot, I think." Masen stared me down some more, and then shrugged.

"You're a really hard person to read, do you know that?" He asked. I had no idea what that meant.

"I think my roommates would disagree with you. Alice can read me like a book, and even Angela knows me pretty well." Masen shook his head.

"Girls." He said, and that was that. He didn't speak again. Even when Edward came down, sitting alone in the armchair rather than joining us on the couch, he didn't mention our strange conversation.

Two days later, I was getting dressed to go on "an adventure." Nessie had called me out of the blue telling me that she got a random Tuesday off her internship and she wanted me to meet some of her friends. She said that her boyfriend had an adventurous job and her roommate was absolutely wild, and she warned me to expect anything. I was excited.

Rather than me driving to the city, Nessie and her friends hopped in her boyfriend's car and drove to the Cullen house. I was wearing my most flexible jeans and a loose tee shirt, a throwback to my college days. Esme was home, so she sat with me waiting for them to arrive.

They pulled into the driveway a few minutes late, and Nessie hopped out of the car before it even stopped moving.

"Can I use your bathroom?" She asked Esme, as she rushed to the door.

"Sure, there's one downstairs. First door on the left." She was off. Behind her, a woman and a man got out of the car. The man was much taller than Nessie, who was at least an inch taller than me. He looked like he was a few inches taller than Edward even, but easygoing. He had dark russet tanned skin, and his hair was really long. He looked like what I would have expected when she said he was Native American.

The woman, however, was nothing like I had expected. She looked closer to my age than Nessie's age, and seemed very put together. She had very curly black hair, and wide blue eyes. She walked up first, and he followed slowly.

"Hi, I'm Bella." I said, when they reached where Esme and I stood. "This is Esme."

"You look a lot alike. I'm Jake." He thrust a hand out at us, and I shook it warily.

"Jake has no tact. I'm Elizabeth, but you can call me Lizzie." She smiled, rolling her eyes at him.

"Come in." Esme offered, but just then Nessie came running back out the door.

"Let's go! Thank you for your bathroom." She said. She surprised Esme with a quick hug, and then she was halfway to the car before anyone reacted.

"Wish me luck" I whispered to Esme, before walking down to the car. Nessie was already sitting shotgun, so I slid into the back with Lizzie.

From that point on, everything was a blur. First, we stopped by the repair shop that Jake apparently co-owned with his dad. It was a lot nicer than I would have expected, and I could tell that Jake was really proud of it. He'd been taking business classes online to learn how to manage it better, and he was even working on ways to make it grow.

Then, we stopped by "the studio." Though Lizzie worked as a secretary for a financial firm, confirming my suspicion that she was older than Nessie, her true passion was art. In addition to the apartment she lived in with Nessie she owned a small flat that was about 60% open art space, where she made some really incredible pieces. I wondered why she wasn't trying to sell them, but Nessie told me that Lizzie just did it for fun. That was just Lizzie.

She was definitely as wild as Nessie had claimed. While we were in her studio she had us all make live art. She ran down to a convenience store about bought a hundred water balloons. We each got 25 to fill up with paint colors that we like, and then she blindfolded us and herself and we all threw them at a huge piece of canvas fabric she hung on the wall. It was messy, and we all ended up with paint on us, but it was also fun. I surprised myself with how much I enjoyed throwing the balloons. Lizzie told me what when it dried I could have it. It was a really interesting, vibrant finished product, and I was really touched. I had no idea what I would do with a wall-sized canvas, but it was still really sweet.

Then, we just randomly explored the area around Lizzie's apartment. It was the longest I had been in the city since everything had started, and while I liked the Cullens' home I had missed the vibrancy. Based on Edward's reports and the news, which I was watching every day, part of me thought that I would be accosted on the street the second I set foot in Seattle. But, everything was oddly normal. I'd been avoiding the entirety of Seattle but I was fine. Nobody even recognized me or Nessie.

We had so much fun, that on impulse I decided to return the favor. That night, we went to dinner with Alice, Angela, Jasper, and Ben. Alice had bugged me when I called her, telling me to invite Edward and Masen, but I thought that was weird. They were professionals, I reminded her. Besides, Edward had sounded stressed the last few times we spoke. I was sure he wouldn't have a lot of time.

The meal just felt so normal. It felt like what I'd imagined having a sister would be like. The more time I spent with Nessie, the more we seemed to have in common. We're very different, but we're also a lot alike. When we left, Angela and Jasper both privately told me that it was easy to tell that Nessie and I were sisters. When Jake dropped me back off, he told Nessie and me the same thing.

It was great.


	21. Chapter 20

**A/N: Please just remember that you do, in fact like me as a writer after you read this. I love you all, especially those of you who fav/follow and extra especially those of you who review, even though I know you're gonna come after me with pitchforks. So...enjoy?**

**I do not own this world or these characters, just my plot.**

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June came and went. I spent more time with Nessie, stopped avoiding the city in its entirety, and kept working on my bike. By the end of the month, Edward no longer felt the need to talk to me about if I was okay. Instead, when he called we just talked.

It was great to get to talk to him just about everyday things. When he came to the house he'd help me with the bike, or just chat. I felt like we were talking about everything, including my therapy with Kate. I was beyond trying not to fall for Edward, I decided it was too hard. Instead, I just accepted that it was inevitable. I liked him, and it wasn't going to go away. I'd decided it wasn't the worst thing in the world. At the very least, I believed we could be friends.

So, when Edward called me into his office, I was really surprised. He wouldn't tell me anything except that the Swans would be there and that it wouldn't be him conducting the meeting. He was a bit short, a bit brusque, and I resisted the urge to call Masen and ask him to tell me what was going on. Instead, I came to the office when he told me to.

I was not expecting the news people to be outside of the station when I arrived. After convincing myself that it was okay to get into the city a bit, it felt like I was right back at square one. They completely blocked the door to the station, and there were photographers and news people with cameras in my face.

"Isabella where have you been?"

"Is it true that you are still in contact with Tanya Denali?"

"Isabella what are you hiding from the media?"

"Bella!" I heard Edward somewhere in the fray, but for the life of me I couldn't figure out how to get to him. Then, I felt a strong arm around my shoulder.

"I've got you Bella." It was Charlie. I breathed a sigh of relief.

"Isabella, Charles, does this mean your father-daughter bond is growing? Have you found common ground?" Charlie did what I couldn't. With me in one arm and Renee in another, he literally barreled us through the crowd.

I heard people yelling for photographers and cameramen to "get that family photo" but Charlie didn't stop moving until he was handing me off to Edward. They got Renee and me inside and then they shut the door firmly behind us.

"To my office." Edward said. Even with an arm around my waist from getting me inside Edward still seemed more distant than usual. I wasn't sure what to make of it until we got into his office. I didn't recognize the woman sitting on his desk. But she had a smirk on her face as we walked in and sat down and I immediately didn't trust her.

"Hi, nice to see all of you." Edward sat down, his mask still in place, and it made me mistrust this woman even more.

"I'm Elle Didyme, one of the lawyers for the prosecution. You can call me Didyme, don't feel rude, everyone does. Let me tell you Miss Isabella, you are very difficult to get in contact with." She was beaming at me like we were going to be the best of friends but I had no idea why. I shrugged. Her demeanor, plus Edward, immediately put me on edge. When I didn't say anything she nodded.

"Moving forward, as you all know our first court date is coming up. I need to know what everyone is going to say for their opening statement on the stand."

"I'm not taking the stand. So can I leave?" I said. I didn't mean to say the last part, but it definitely wasn't the first time my mouth got me in trouble. Didyme narrowed her eyes, and behind her Edward closed his eyes and sighed. It was his reaction more than anything else that told me I was in trouble.

"I suppose that's understandable that you feel conflicted. But Isabella, this is one of the women that took you from your family. You have nothing to say?"

"This is the woman who made sure I was okay every time I fell down. She looked over every scrape, every cut, every bump. She helped us out any time we had hard times. She took care of me my whole life." As I spoke, Didyme raised her eyebrows.

"Wow. I didn't expect you to be so sentimental." Didyme laughed as she spoke, and I saw red. But before I could say anything, Edward coughed and spoke up.

"Didyme."

"Yes Edward?" I didn't like the way she looked at him either. She tossed her deep black hair over her shoulder and stared him down like a lioness.

"I think that maybe you should explain the court process a little more." He said. Despite the fact that he seemed more reserved than I ever heard him, including when he spoke to Jane, she smiled at him.

"Well, Bella, Charlie, Renee. I would of course love to help you all craft your statements. Your testimony will be neither for the defense nor the prosecution, I'm sorry if I didn't make it clear."

I hadn't told her to call me Bella, and I resented her for doing it. Somehow Renee sensed my tension, because she lay her hand on my shoulder.

"We always planned to speak to Bella when the time came and see how she felt about it."

"Excuse me?" Didyme asked.

"Was that not clear?" Charlie asked. There was an edge in his voice, and I appreciated that he seemed to dislike Didyme like I did.

"I'm, I just have trouble understanding what you'd be thinking about. I understand why Bella might be sentimental, but I mean, this is the person who most likely took your baby all those years ago. If she hadn't been arrested, you might have never known your whole life that your daughter was a few hours' drive away from you."

"That's true. But we don't know Jane or Tanya. We don't know why they did what they did. We know Bella, and despite the fact that she's tried to spare our feelings, we know how much she loves them. And we don't blame her for that. But we're not going to help put away the people who were her family without at least talking to her." Renee said, rubbing my shoulder with her hand. I looked at them, but I didn't know what to say.

"That's, I mean I understand of course but don't you think…" Didyme stopped in open mouth stare like she couldn't believe what we were saying. Edward cleared his throat again.

"Maybe we should give them time to talk?" Edward said. Didyme beamed again.

"Absolutely, let's go outside." She was all smiles again, as if he'd invited her to bed. I decided at that moment that I didn't like her. At all. Then I realized that I had other priorities.

"How are you doing?" Renee asked me, as soon as the door clicked shut. I shook my head.

"I did not see this coming, at all. I think I'm in shock."

"You didn't know?" Charlie asked.

"Did you?" Charlie and Renee exchanged a look, but it was Renee who answered.

"Edward called us about a week ago to say that the prosecution might be contacting us soon for our testimony. But we didn't think they'd drag us all in here at once. I'm surprised he didn't tell you." Not more surprised than I was. But I didn't want to say anything I would regret, so I just shrugged. Renee took that as a sign to continue.

"What do you think?" Renee asked. I just looked between them.

"Did you really mean that?" I asked. It was obvious that they meant it, but I couldn't believe it. "Wouldn't you want to say something on the stand?"

"Bella, okay we need to talk to you. I think we've all been putting this conversation off. But Charlie and I have spoken about it. We know that you don't want to talk about them because you don't want to hurt our feelings. But as much as we love you, and we love you so, so incredibly much, we don't, we weren't there when you were growing up. We missed that. And I can be honest it makes me really, really want to hate Tanya Denali. But I can't, because she kept you safe and you're alive because of her. I can get to know you for the rest of my life because of her. Because of both of them. And more importantly I can't hate them because I know how much they mean to you. So I don't know what to do, and Charlie and I don't know the right thing any more than you do." I felt myself tearing up.

"Okay." My voice wavered.

"What would you want us to do?" Charlie asked.

"I can't." I said. I knew what I wanted but I couldn't make myself say it.

"Go ahead." Renee said, moving closer and rubbing my back.

"I don't want you to speak. But I can't ask you. I can't."

"Then we won't." Charlie said with an air of finality. Then I was crying. I threw my arms around Renee, and she rubbed my back as I cried. Charlie scooted closer, and then he was with both of us. And the three of us just sat together as I cried. In that moment, despite all of the conversation and the meetings and the pleasantries, I felt more related to Charlie and Renee than ever before. I think that was the first moment that I thought of them as my parents.

Of course, with a knock on the door Didyme ruined the moment.

"One second." Renee said. She looked down at me and wiped away my tears, and we sat up. Didyme took that one second seriously, barging in with an irritated Edward walking in behind her. I could tell that he was irritated from the way he was smiling, the corners of his eyes tight and the clench in his jaw that I knew meant he was clenching his teeth.

"Did you work it out?" Didyme was all smiles. "Are we good to go?"

"We've decided not to give a statement." Renee smiled at Didyme. Didyme raised her eyebrows and got the sourest look on her face.

"I am so sorry, but this is ridiculous. I don't, how are you going to not testify? You are, this case is about you. She took your child. I can't believe you."

"That is enough." Charlie didn't raise his voice, but he was firm. Didyme looked taken aback. She frowned, and then straightened herself out and stood tall.

"I am so sorry for getting emotional." Didmye was all smiles again, all tossing her hair.

"I think I just get very into my job. I love my job. And I really genuinely do believe that people who commit crimes should be punished. But I can also appreciate why you might not feel the same in this situation as I do." She smiled, and for a brief moment I thought that maybe I had misjudged her. Then she turned to Edward.

"I guess your testimony will have to be enough Edward. Makes my life more difficult but I guess it makes the case more fun." She practically coed at him. She immediately looked at me and even though I know that this is ridiculous, I still can't help feeling like she to be purposefully vindictive. She was smirking as stepped back towards the door.

"Now that I have all this time, I should meet again and re-strategize with the other lawyers on the team. I'll see myself out Edward." She breezed out of the room, leaving silence in her wake. Edward took one look at my shocked face and slumped back in his chair, pinching the bridge of his nose so hard it looked like he might break it. Charlie spoke first.

"Edward, it's a tough job being a detective son. Renee, we'd better get going. Bella, we're going to have dinner with Vanessa tonight if you'd like to join us. I know this is last minute."

"Yeah, sure." I said, still in shock. Renee rubbed my back as she and Charlie left the room. She looked like she wanted to say something, but instead she surprised me by kissing the top of my head as she walked out.

"We'll call you when we figure out where we're going and when." She said, and then they were gone. Immediately Edward was out of his chair, in Renee's abandoned seat, and was trying to make eye contact with me. I looked past him, and then turned so he was only getting my profile.

"Bella." He sounded so nervous.

"Why?" I asked, still staring out straight ahead.

"Bella, it's part of my job. I have to testify to what's happened since I took on the case. It's my job. I'm sorry." I started shaking my head before he even finished speaking.

"I find that very hard to believe." I said.

"Bella, I wouldn't lie to you." He said. I shook my head again.

"It doesn't matter." I said.

"Really?" He sounded so incredulous and hopeful, and I knew that he was getting his hopes up. I turned to look at him.

"You've spoken to me every day this week and you couldn't find the time to tell me that, that woman was going to come in here and ask me to testify? You couldn't tell me that you had to testify?" I really wanted him to say something that was going to make me feel better, but I knew when he winced that he wouldn't.

"Bella, I…" He trailed off with a heavy sigh.

"Can you just tell me why you didn't tell me?" I asked. I was surprising myself. I thought that I would be hurt, or emotional, but I was calm. It hurt me that Edward was upset, but he had really hurt me first.

"I didn't think that Didyme would do this with you in the room. I didn't think she'd want you here. And I thought, I don't know, I thought that with things with Kate going well that I didn't need to bring it up because it was going to hurt you."

"Okay. So you thought that finding out the day of the trial after I trusted Renee and Charlie" I couldn't bring myself to say 'and you' "was preferable to hearing it on the phone and having time to adjust?"

"Bella, I was just trying to look out for you." Edward sighed, and then he was pinching his nose again. I shook my head.

"Edward" I didn't make it much farther. I didn't know what to say. I wasn't even angry at that point, just a little disappointed and a lot hurt.

"This whole time I thought that we were, you don't have to take baby steps around me. It's not your job. I am going through something difficult but I'm an adult. And I thought that we were friends, that you understood that. But you're still just trying to protect me from everything. You're terrible at it, but boy you won't stop trying."

"Bella of course we're friends but that doesn't mean I can't try to keep things from being any more difficult on you. It is my job."

"Edward, being friends means you don't get to decide what's too difficult for me. Anyways it's a moot point. You don't have to worry about me anymore."

"I'm not just going to stop." He said. I shrugged.

"Well, then you can worry by yourself. Since there's nothing new in the case and I'm not testifying, there's no reason for you to contact me, right? So I'm done, I guess. I'll see you on Sunday for dinner." I stood then, pulling my hand out of Edward's grasp when he tried to grab me.

"Bella, this is my job." Edward said again. I nodded.

"I get that Edward. Testifying is your job. I'm your job. And I'm telling you that I'm alright and that this part of your job is done. So bye." I walked out. He followed me all the way through the precinct. Every time I had to stop moving he would try to say something but I ignored him.

"Bella, you can't just shut me out." He said when we got to my car. I looked at him then.

"Actually, Edward, I can. I can shut you out, I can handle hearing the truth without dissolving into an emotional mess, and I can take care of myself. You're off the hook, congrats." I got into my car before I could lose my resolve. I didn't look at him, so I have no idea if he stood outside or went back in. I've never asked.

I'm sure Edward called his mother because when I got back to the house Esme asked me if I wanted to talk. I thanked her, but I told her that I was fine. In a strange way, I was. To me, it was simple.

I had let myself become too attached to Edward. I was letting myself fall for him, even though I knew that he didn't return my feelings, because at least we were friends. But that day, it was impossible to me that Edward considered us friends. I saw everything that he was doing to try to protect me, to keep me in the dark, as proof that I was just a job to him. He thought it was his job to protect me and all of the phone calls, him stopping by, all of it was a part of his job. He'd basically said so himself. Once I made that connection, it was easy for me to see that I needed to go cold turkey and force myself to let go of him for good.

The saying is always easier than the doing. The next day, Edward called me nine times. I ignored him every time, even when the phone went off at dinner and I knew Esme saw that it was him. She didn't say anything, and neither did I. On Sunday, I had cooked an elaborate dinner. I thought of saying that I was sick, but I decided that hiding away wasn't really getting over it. Instead, I was polite but I didn't elaborate on anything that I said and I definitely didn't speak to him first. When he asked to talk to me privately I reminded him that he was off the hook and told him to enjoy the time with his parents, and then I went to my room to do work.

On Monday Masen called me, and I couldn't bring myself not to pick up. He barely said hello before he launched into a whole long explanation of why it was unfair for me to be mad at Edward about his job. I let him get it all out, and then I corrected him.

"I'm not mad at Edward for testifying. I'm not mad at Edward at all." I said.

"Bullshit. You're acting mad." He said. Masen had never sworn at me before, so I could tell he was getting upset. I tried to explain.

"Masen, I really care about Edward, as a person. You know? He really cares about me, as a job. And I get that, because I am his job. But I thought we were friends too, and a friend wouldn't have let me be blindsided like that. So he's off the hook. I can't, there's no line for me between what he is and what he's supposed to be and I don't like living in the middle. He's never going to get over that need to look out for me because of work, and I can't live with that. I can't handle being treated like a child or like I'm made out of glass, even if that is his job. So I guess, that's not his job anymore."

"Bella." Masen sounded like there was something he wanted to say. I heard his steady, even breathing.

"I'm not going to be able to convince you that you're misreading things, am I?" He said.

"Masen, I know you and Edward are friends. Tell me honestly, if it was you in my boat, and he knew that you, him, and your parents were going to be asked to testify in court. If he knew, and he had to know, how absolutely opposed to the idea you'd be, and he knew that he was going to have to do it anyways. Wouldn't he have told you? Wouldn't you have had a conversation about it before some girl who was practically foaming at the mouth for him asked for your testimony?"

Masen sounded so defeated when he said "Yes."

"But Bella, that's different." He was pleading, but I knew I was right.

"I know, Masen. It is. Because you two are friends. And I'm his responsibility." It was all clear as day to me, and I took Masen's silence to mean that it was clear to him too. I changed the topic, and I wasn't surprised when the next day Masen didn't call me back.


	22. Chapter 21

**A/N: Nothing to say, really. Let's just get on with this! Love you all so much for your kind words, conspiracy theories, favs and follows :D **

**Unfortunately for my student fees, I do not own any part of Twilight, just my plot. **

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For two weeks, I thought that I was getting over it. I really did. I thought that I had moved on from everything that happened and I was ready to start anew. At first, Alice and Angela had both been on my side. Five days in Angela told me that refusing to even talk to him on the phone meant that I wasn't moving on I was just avoiding him. Then she asked me if I was cutting him out because I was upset with him, or because I was upset about Didyme. Nine days in Alice tried to convince me that I had seriously freaked him out, and told me that if I really didn't want to talk to him I should at least speak to him in a professional setting and explain why. She said that I was misreading the situation. By the time even Alice was questioning me I wondered if I had overreacted, but I told them both not to worry about me and not to worry about him.

In the meantime, while I was evaluating my decisions, I called Renee and we had a long conversation about what had happened with Didyme that ended with me taking back what I said about them testifying. I figured that if Edward was testifying, the Swans deserved it as well. This was partially driven by Kate as well, who reminded me that this was probably an important part of their healing process. I didn't want to hold them back from that just because it would make me uncomfortable. From the relief in Renee's voice by the end of our conversation, I knew I'd done the right thing.

Mid-July my work load was just starting to die down as the seasons finished transitioning. However, as an interior designer Esme's work load was picking up as all of the couples with June weddings started having their dream homes renovated. It meant that she was keeping as unusual hours as her husband. She was in and out all the time, so much so that I'd taken to making her cold lunches in the fridge so that she'd have something quick to grab. Of course she told me I didn't have to, but I was concerned. The more I got to know Carlisle and Esme genuinely, as people, the more I liked them.

I was working on putting the finishing touches on a bacon club with chicken breast and homemade spicy mayo when I heard the front door open quietly.

"Esme I'm in the kitchen your sandwich is almost done!" I called. When she didn't say anything, I knew she'd been trying to sneak in and out.

"I mean it, you need to eat real food you can't just" I stopped speaking as Edward rounded the corner.

"Oh, sorry. I thought you were your mom. Esme's not home." I said, continuing with her sandwich.

"I'm not here to talk to my mom."

"Your dad is at work too." I said, as I sliced the sandwich in half.

"I'm not here for my parents. Bella, can you at least look at me?"

"Sorry Edward, did something come up with the case?" I asked, turning my back to him as I looked for a Tupperware container. I didn't hear him move, but then Edward was behind me. He reached into the cabinet above me and pulled out a container before slamming it onto the counter.

"Bella, I'm serious." He said. So I looked at him. I looked up at him and I immediately wished I hadn't. Even looking bad he looked great. He had bags under his eyes like he hadn't been sleeping, but his jaw, his eyes, his hair, everything about him was still incredible. I realized that Alice and Angela were right to say I was kidding myself thinking I was over him.

"What would you like to say?" I asked, trying to keep my voice steady. I wanted to tell him to leave and I wanted to kiss him and I wanted to go back to having his attention even if it was for work. He was so close too, close enough that I had to look up to talk to him.

"I don't get why, I just don't get it. This whole thing. It's not fair Bella. This is my job, I can't change that. And I can't, I won't quit my job."

"Edward nobody is asking you to quit your job." My voice was maybe a bit too sharp, but I was still keeping my cool for the most part.

"Really? Because I have to do one thing that you don't like and you completely shut me out of your life."

"That's not why, Edward. And honestly, I don't think you're capable of understanding why." I said, shrugging.

"What possible other reason?" He didn't sound too angry, mostly confused.

"I'm just done with having you babysit me all the time for work. There is nothing left here. I promise you I'm not hiding any more secret parents. So I let you off the hook. That's it."

"But we're, friends." He paused just slightly before the word friends, stepping even closer to me.

"Are we? Edward, how did I end up living here?" I asked him.

"The paparazzi" He said. I shook my head.

"Specifically, this house."

"I offered." He said. I shook my head again.

"You decided. Because that's your job. And that's, I mean, that is your job Edward. But…" Edward sighed.

"Bella, I know I can be pushy sometimes…" He trailed off when he saw me frown, and I realized that we needed to have this conversation.

"It's not, I mean, that's you. I get that. But Edward, it's a lot to deal with. You're good at what you do. I don't want this to be a job critique or anything. It's just, a lot."

"Bella, I am listening to you. I really am. But I'm not going to apologize for caring about you."

"And you don't have to! That's your job, Edward. I get that. But I can't keep feeling like – thinking that we're friends Edward. It's, I relied on you a lot. That's not healthy for me."

"Bella, you can count on me. I'm here for you. This whole thing doesn't make sense."

"Edward, it's like what you said the other day. What I'm dealing with, that's not your job. It's bigger than your job. And I went to Kate and Kate is amazing and she's really helped me just like you said. But I can't keep putting all of that on you because one day you're going to have a new case and you're going to have to care about somebody else and I can't just rely on you until then."

"And finding out I had to testify made you think that?" Edward looked so lost. I knew I was doing a terrible job of explaining, but I couldn't think of how to say it any simpler.

"Edward, if Alice or Angela had done what you did, I could have talked it out with them because we're friends. But I can't fault you for making the decision that you made because it's work. You made a judgment call and I wish you would have made a different one but I overreacted. At first, maybe I was mad. But that just made me realize that I was too emotionally invested and I knew that I needed to back off and let you focus on the other, more important parts of your job."

"So Alice and Angela have the right to talk it out with you, but you're just going to stay mad at me and nothing I could do would change that? You won't even, Bella you haven't talked to me in weeks. Even when I'm here. You won't even tell me why you're mad!" He looked so upset, and I knew that I was seriously messing up my explanation.

"Edward that's what I'm trying to tell you! I don't need to forgive you because I'm not mad at you. That would be like getting angry at, I don't know, the UPS guy for being late. If a friend stands you up that's one thing. But the UPS guy is just doing his job. He's not personally invested, right? Sometimes he's going to make a mistake and that's life! I just needed to realize that because I couldn't make that distinction. I made it personal and I really, ugh this is embarrassing, I relied on you, you know? And I shouldn't have." Edward stared at me for a long time.

"Bella, I'm not the UPS guy. I care about you, you know that right? I mean, I really care about you." He was begging me with his eyes, but I didn't know what he wanted.

"Edward, you've made it very clear that all of this, me, is your job. I respect that. But I can't live like that. I need it to be real." That was the most vulnerable I could get. I refused to tell him that I'd developed a crush on him, even though I knew that he would understand it then. I knew that if he knew he would back off, and give me space. But I refused to give up that last piece of my dignity. I knew I couldn't tell him that, have him agree that he needed to back off of me, and then be alright.

"Fuck, Masen." He said under his breath. I knew I wasn't supposed to hear, and I wondered if Masen had said something to him.

"Masen and I talked about this, on the phone." I told him. He nodded.

"Right, and Masen told me that you somehow thought that we, that you and me, aren't really friends. And I told him that he was being ridiculous and that he must have misunderstood you."

"Edward, we're not friends." I said again. He cut me off.

"Then what exactly are we, Bella? I call you every single day of my life unless I have an issue. I know your other friends. We've talked –"

"About me! We talk all of the time about me. That's not a friendship. You have to call me, to make sure I'm aright, to check up on me, to see where my head is. That's called a responsibility Edward." I looked away from him then. The eye contact was too intense and I was afraid I was going to say something about my feelings that I would regret. I could feel myself tearing up, and I absolutely refused to cry over this.

"You think I've spent hours on the phone with you because of my job?" He was leaning down towards me as he spoke, making me make eye contact. Without warning he lifted me up and dropped me on the counter, holding on to my forearms to steady me. He dropped his hands to either side of me and made eye contact with me again.

"You're thorough." I shrugged, still trying to look away.

"Isabella. I call you because I really care about you. Because we are friends."

"A friend doesn't keep things like that from someone, Edward." I said, and I realized I was more upset than I initially thought by the way my voice wavered. Immediately he put one of his hands on mine, and he looked so concerned. It was too much.

"Fine, you wanted the truth. Do you know how much I care about you Edward? Not because I have to, not because it's my job to keep track of you and how you're doing, but just because I want to know. It's too much, it's too hard to keep caring about you like that and then being reminded constantly that this is your job. I know I'm your job Edward, but I'm a real person with real feelings and if I keep investing them in this friendship that's not a friendship I'm going to get really, really hurt."

"Bella, I still don't, why aren't we friends? We were, I thought we had a great relationship going. What turned that over all of a sudden?"

"If we were friends you would have told me. Don't get that look on your face. If I was Masen, even if you hadn't known him for most of your life, you would have sat me down and told me everything. But you didn't Edward because you see me as your job and you keep trying to protect me. Edward, I am not a child and I'm really trying to look out for myself here. I can't live with being your friend in the interim until I'm your responsibility again."

"Stop saying that! What does that even mean, you're my responsibility? Bella, I care about you as a friend. As a person. I don't know how else I'm going to have to tell you." He squeezed my hand as he spoke, his hand completely encasing mine.

"It means that at the end of the day your job is the reason you care so much, even though you don't want to admit it! And now I yelled, so congratulations I'm hysterical and now you get to swoop in and solve me."

"That's what you really think? You think that I care this much about you, that I call you and check in on you and told you to go to Kate and brought you to live with my parents because I want to do well at my job?" Edward closed his eyes, looking like he was at war with himself. I had nowhere to go, trapped by his stance and the one hand that was still holding onto mine. He opened his eyes and stared into my eyes so deeply that I couldn't look away. He took another step towards my perch on the counter, and suddenly he was much too close for friends, but he didn't notice.

"You're right about one thing. I absolutely don't feel the same way about Masen that I do about you."

"Because you guys are friends." I cut in.

"Because I have never, ever, ever worried about Masen like I worry about you. I wake up every morning and I wonder if when I call you I'm going to hear that you're having a good day because that'll make me feel happy just knowing that you're doing alright. I could've fucked up that reporter outside your door, and the only reason I didn't is because I had to get into your apartment to make sure with my own eyes that you were okay. I brought you to the place that I feel the safest and the happiest because I needed to know that the people you were with were going to take care of you and I made up excuses for why I needed to visit every few days just so I had some stupid reason to see you in person." He paused, taking a deep breath and looking down at me, but I wasn't going to stop him. I could tell he'd been holding it in for a long time.

"And then I fucked up, and I know I did Bella. I know I should have told you about testifying and I am sorry but Didyme called for me to arrange this meeting with no warning and I thought that maybe, even though I knew you'd be mad, I could fix it afterwards. And then you didn't talk to me for what has been two of the shittiest weeks I've ever had." He paused to get his breath, but when I inhaled to speak he beat me to the punch, moving his other hand so that both of my hands were in his. He was looking at me so intently that I bit my lip, and he kept glancing down at my mouth the more he spoke.

"The worst part is Masen knows how I feel about you, and how I care way more than I should, and he told me that you thought that I only cared about you because of my job and I told him that he had to have misunderstood. Because how was it not ridiculously obvious that I care about you way more than I should? Way, way more than what's appropriate for this case or any other case. If anything, I keep trying to tell myself that this needs to stay a job because Bella I…I really can't…" and then he was kissing me. It happened so quickly that I almost wasn't sure it was happening. But it was.

I felt him start to pull back, so I panicked. I threaded my hands through his hair and pulled him back into me, and he groaned into my mouth. I wanted to stop him, ask him what was going on, but instead I just kept kissing him. Edward moved his hands to my sides, and then to my waist, before sliding them to my back and pulling us closer together. I gasped at the motion and he used it as the opportunity to deepen the kiss. Then he abruptly took a step back.

"Bella, I can't" I cut him off by grabbing his shirt.

"Explain later" I said, before I kissed him again. We stayed like that for a long time, feverishly kissing. I knew, logically, that I should be talking to him. I knew that I should be telling him that he needed to explain to me what was going on, not that it was difficult to put the pieces together. I knew that I needed to apologize, or demand an apology, or something. But we weren't stopping. He shifted even closer to me, and his hands began to wander, first down, then up, up, up. Just as he was about to make contact the front door opened. I felt like a high scholar again, frozen with Edward's hands just under my breasts and feeling guilty. He immediately helped me down off the counter, and then carefully put his mom's sandwich in the Tupperware. For my part, I tried to pull myself together to deal with Esme as I began slicing an apple.

"Bella, are you home?" She called.

"Edward and I are in the kitchen." I said, deciding to pretend that everything was normal. In a way it was. No clothes had been removed, nothing about our appearance indicated that Edward had even been here for more than a few minutes. I glanced at the clock, and I was startled to see that almost an hour had passed since Edward had first come over.

"Bella, you don't have to keep making me lunch. I promise you that I can throw something together." Esme said as she came around the corner. She walked over to Edward first, making him lean down so she could kiss him on the cheek, and then she grabbed the sandwich from him.

"Did you buy a rotisserie?" She asked, peering at the sandwich.

"Yeah, but I'm using the rest for pasta. For myself, I promise, but if you or Carlisle want anything rather than making an entire second dinner, you're more than welcome to eat with me."

"Edward, are you going to be joining us for dinner?" Esme asked. Her voice had taken on a different quality, and from the way she was glancing between me and Edward I could tell she'd just realized it was strange.

"Yeah, Bella and I have a lot that we need to talk about." He glanced at me, and I was surprised to see how nervous he looked.

"Did you apologize?" Esme asked him. His eyes widened.

"Mom you don't even know what happened. Maybe Bella owed me an apology."

"We're working it out." I told Esme, because it was true. Even though it was obvious that my crush on Edward had to be at least partially mutual it didn't explain everything that had happened. Edward leaned down to kiss his mom on the cheek.

"Mom I have to go back to work, but I'll see you later for dinner." As he spoke I finished slicing the apple and handed it to her.

"I was going to cube some cheese but I'm sure you'd say that's too much, right? Here, eat because I know you're going to be running out of here any minute now. Come on Edward, I'll walk you out." Edward followed me out of the kitchen towards the front door, but when we'd passed his mom's line of sight he grabbed my wrist to stop me. Just having him holding onto me after kissing him was enough to make me blush, and I realized with horror that I must have been blushing when his mom walked into the kitchen.

"Don't shut me out again, okay? Are we really going to talk after dinner?" Edward asked. I took my hand back, but I nodded.

"We're really going to talk." I said. He smiled as he left.

Several hours later, I had to make good on that promise. Without even saying anything, Edward followed me down to the den as soon as dinner was over. We set on the couch, facing each other.

"Edward…" I didn't know what else to say. Even after thinking it through, even after considering everything from the lens of Edward having feelings for me, I still didn't get some of it.

"Why didn't you just tell me?" I asked. Edward leaned back in the couch.

"Honestly? I knew you would be upset. I knew that you probably weren't going to testify, and I knew that you would be hurt that I was. And we were getting along and, I mean I like you Bella. Way more than I should. I shouldn't care that something is going to hurt your feelings because first and foremost it's my job to tell you, but I didn't want to hurt you so I just put it off. If I knew that Didyme was going to ask you to testify, I would have told you sooner, but I thought I had more time. It's not, I care about you a lot." He punctuated this by making eye contact with me again, and I really tried to see his point of view.

"Why not just tell me that?" I said.

"Bella, I didn't mean to kiss you. I shouldn't have. Not because I didn't want to, but because it's my job not to. I'm not going to say that I didn't suspect that you might like me back, because I did. But we can't, this can't be a thing Bella. Not until your case ends."

"Okay." I said.

"I'm really sorry. Believe me, I'm really sorry. Because I do like you, Bella. And I keep worrying about you and keep trying to remind myself to back off and let you breathe. But me working on your case is blurring the lines because I just want to protect you from all of this. So we can't."

I had to fight not to smile. I understood the reality, which was that nothing was going to happen. It made sense that nothing was going to happen. Edward was right, we couldn't just do whatever we wanted because there would be consequences for our actions. But still, it was incredibly gratifying and flattering to hear that Edward liked me. I couldn't not get excited.

"Edward, I get it. I'm not upset, I get it. I agree with you, this is not the time." I said, even though what I really wanted to do was yank him into my room and continue where we'd left off. Edward still looked concerned, and displeased. I scooted closer to him, and gave him a very careful hug.

"Thank you for caring about me. And if the feelings are still there when everything is over then you just gave me something else to look forward to at the end of this case." Edward hugged me back, leaning close to my ear to whisper.

"When everything is over Bella, you won't be able to keep me away." He kissed my cheek, then stood.

"I'm going to head home. I'll call you tomorrow." I was more right about needing something to look forward to than I knew.


	23. Chapter 22

**A/N at the end this time. And I have checked but sadly I still do not own Twilight or its beautiful world, just my plot.**

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Things progressed.

I won't pretend to understand all of the facets of the case, or why they needed to occur. First, they interviewed me and the Swans, even though we weren't going to testify in court. They needed official statements about our understanding of what had happened. I tried my best to work with the man interviewing me, knowing that my alternative was to speak to Didyme. If anything, knowing how Edward felt about me made me dislike her more, because she was so obviously into him. I didn't ask him if he was interested in her, but it made me like him more to know that he thought she was manipulative and condescending.

Edward and I both agreed that he needed to keep me updated on the case even if he thought it would be difficult for me to hear, so I was the first to find out that the hospital in Montana confirmed that Jane had been in Montana when I had been kidnapped, which was after Tanya had already left the area. Jane had never been spotted in Washington, but they all said that she'd been talking about Tanya's daughter already even though according to her testimony she didn't know until after her trip.

It was all hearsay and rumors, nothing concrete, but it was enough to make me curious. Until that point, I hadn't considered the role Jane had played in my kidnapping. I believed that she knew that Tanya had kidnapped me and helped cover for her. I even believed that maybe she had gotten my fake birth certificate so that Tanya could get me a social security number. But after hearing Edward's news, I knew I needed to talk to someone about my suspicions.

Edward was out automatically, because of his involvement in the case. That also left Masen out, because even though I'd come to see Masen as my friend I didn't want him telling Edward I was asking questions. Alice was out because she was so optimistic that she would try to sugarcoat what she thought to put a positive spin on it. Angela was out because I already knew she thought that Jane and Tanya were both equally guilty. The only other person I was close enough to was Nessie, who I was still hanging out with once a week even though her internship was kicking her butt. That left Kate, who was becoming the guardian of all of my secrets.

I was a few minutes late to our Wednesday appointment the Wednesday after Edward had told me about Jane. The receptionist was frowning at me as I arrived, and told me to head right in. Kate was sitting at her desk, her hair piled up on her head, and sighed at me.

"Five more minutes and this session would have been canceled." She told me, in a mock-warning tone. It was the policy of her office, but I knew that even if I had been late Kate probably would have still let me in. I still felt bad though.

"I'm sorry, the traffic was awful today." I said.

"That's alright, it happens. How was your week?"

"I got some news that I don't know how to digest. I finally finished building my bike! Alice thinks Jasper might be warming up to the marriage thing, Edward told me a woman in my office is engaged and invites me to her wedding, and Angela is celebrating her first major fight with Ben."

"Celebrating?"

"She thinks it's a good sign that they had a huge fight and didn't break up."

"Uh, alright. Well, we'll get to your big news in a minute. Why the relationship-themed update this week?" I hadn't even realized that until she'd asked. I shrugged, even though I knew what she was going to say.

"Try harder, Bella."

"I really don't know. I already told you about, well what happened with me and Edward." Kate had taken one look at me that week and told me it was obvious that we had made up. It all came spilling out of me, just like it did when Alice, Angela and I had gone to the movies. I talked so much before the movie started that I still had a full bag of popcorn, and I'd talked to Kate about every possible facet of my emotions.

"Okay, and it's been a week since then. You've had more time to think about it. Has anything changed?"

"I know we talked about how I'm oversimplifying my feelings. And how I need to be careful that I don't put too much of my expectations on me or on him. But, I don't know, it feels weird. It's not harder than I expected, but it's a strange feeling. I know he likes me, for a fact. And he knows I like him. But we can't be involved. That's nothing new." Kate looked at me for a moment.

"How are you dealing with that? The strangeness?"

"We're friends. I'm trying not to touch him because that makes it feel so much worse. We don't talk about it either, like at all. It's like we're avoiding each other but we see each other every day. But Kate, I don't mind waiting, even though it's difficult. He's worth it."

"Okay."

"Really?"

"Bella, you don't need me to approve what you're thinking or feeling. If that's how you feel, then okay. I can tell you've thought about it, which is the important part. I just want to make sure you're thinking through these things."

"Alright." I said.

"Okay, tell me your news."

"I think Jane kidnapped me. Like actually kidnapped me from my, from Charlie and Renee."

"Okay." Kate nodded.

"It's just, I can't keep thinking about this. It's constantly on my mind, you know?"

"I mean, Bella, the only way you're going to know is if you ask Jane." Kate gave me a hard look over her desk. It was her "this conversation is over" look. I'd gotten a few times, but never so early in a conversation. For the rest of our time I was a bit disengaged, trying to figure out why she cut me off so quickly.

When I left, I drove around for a bit. I still had no idea why Kate had dismissed me so quickly. Confused, I thought more about her response. Theoretically, Kate was right. I knew that on a logical level the only way I was going to know for sure was if Jane told me. But any confession that she made during our meeting would be recorded and could be used as evidence.

I thought about this as I went back to my room in Carlisle and Esme's home, and as I got caught up on work. I'd slacked a bit over the course of the week, but even though I knew that I was working at a quicker rate than I had in the office, I still felt the need to match the new pace I'd been setting. It was strange, I actually enjoyed my work more when it was something that I could work on to distract myself from my life.

Still, when Angela called me I took the much needed break.

"How was therapy?" Angela asked as soon as I picked up.

"Hi Angela."

"Sorry, hey Bella."

"It was good, you know, it was, well, not really. Not today."

"Oh, I wasn't expecting an answer. I think this is the first time you have said anything about Kate other than telling us how she's a miracle worker."

"Kate is great. She really is. I mean, I think I'm about as happy as I can possibly be about all of this, and that's Kate. But today just wasn't very helpful."

"Oh, why?"

"I know what you think about this Angela, but I'm just starting to, I think Jane did. I think she actually kidnapped me, physically. And that's, I mean, I know that knowing the truth won't solve all my problems. But I feel like I just have to know." Angela was silent, and I knew that she was biting her tongue. She finally said

"What did Kate say that wasn't helpful?"

"She said that the only way I would know is if I asked her."

"But you can't…" Angela trailed off.

"I know." I said.

"Wait. Okay, wait. I think, Bella, you can't ask right? Because she can't tell you the answer out loud. But she can kind of tell you. I mean, can't she tell you another way?"

"Angela, you're not making sense."

"Bella, remember like right after you moved in with me and Alice you told us about Jane? You guys did that thing when you didn't want your mom, when you didn't want Tanya to know what you were talking about?"

"Yes? Yes! Wait, Angela you're a genius!"

"Just, be careful with that Bella."

"I know, but Angela you're brilliant. Seriously. What did you call me about?"

"When was the last time you spoke to Alice?"

"Like two days ago. I miss you guys. It's still weird not seeing you every day."

"Yeah, I know, I agree. But, and you can't tell her I said anything, I think she and Jasper had a fight."

"What?" Alice and Jasper only ever have bad fights. They rarely disagree, and when they do it's always catastrophic. Jasper is very immediately confrontational, which never mixes well with Alice.

"I went over there to see if I could catch her before work and she had a bunch of blankets and stuff set up on the couch. And you know that's Alice because she needs like a million blankets at night. But she just chatted it up like everything was okay so I didn't ask. I just, was wondering if you knew anything."

"She didn't say anything last time I talked to her. Alice always brings these things up, Angela. It has to be something else. Maybe someone's crashing at their place?"

"Like who, Bella? I know Alice tells us everything, but I'm just worried. It always takes a toll on her when they fight, even though they always get through it."

"If she tells me anything, I'll call you." I said.

"Same. Bye Bella."

"Bye." With that, I hung up. Part of me wanted to call Alice immediately, but I knew that even if I asked her point-blank Alice would only tell me if she was ready to talk.

Instead, I made an appointment to go see Jane.

Admittedly, it had been a while since I had last seen my Aunt. Though I'd been calling her, it was still strange and uncomfortable to see her. She didn't have enough money to post what I thought was a ridiculously high bail, and she wouldn't accept any of my money either.

When I saw her, she looked so tired. I instantly felt guilty. I gave her a good, long hug the second I saw her until one of the guards cleared his throat in a not-so-subtle reminder for me to back off. I did, and the two of us sat down.

"I've missed you, Bella." She said, and I instantly felt my anxiety rise. Suddenly, I felt incredibly neglectful.

"I'm really sorry, I should be visiting more."

"It's alright, Bella. Darling, I don't ever want you to feel bad about any of this. I can wish about the situation as much as I want to but Tanya made this bed. Not you." It was weird to hear her pin it on my mom. The two of them had always been a team. But I knew, especially with a case that was still being discussed weekly on the news, that she had to throw her sister under the bus.

"How have you been, Bella?"

"I've been good, I guess. Kate, my therapist that I told you about, has really been helping me. I'm not as all over the place as I was, I don't think."

"You sound happier. No, don't make that face. Bella, I really hope you don't think I'm sitting in here wanting you to be miserable. When you're happy, I'm happy. That's all I want. I love you."

"I love you too." I said, grabbing both of her hands.

"Have you, do they tell you what the new developments are?" I asked. Jane nodded.

"If you mean do I know they're trying to pin everything on me, then yes. But Bella, I don't want you to worry about that, alright? That's not your concern, your concern is getting to know your birth parents and pretending you don't like Edward." I blushed, I could feel it instantly.

"Oh, is there something you're not telling me? I can't believe my Baby Bell is holding back information from me."

"You haven't called me that for years!" I said, squeezing her hands. She smiled.

"I guess I've been thinking of you and how you were back then a lot recently." It was as if she'd given me the perfect transition to avoid suspicion. I knew I had to leap on the opportunity.

"Do you remember that game we invented when you were babysitting and something happened that we needed to keep from mom?" Jane tilted her head, and for a second I thought she didn't get it.

"Not really." She said, but then I felt it. She folded her finger on her right hand back and tapped my palm. That meant yes, she remembered.

"Oh, well, that's too bad." I said, fighting to keep nerves out of my voice. I wanted to be as relaxed as possible.

"I think the case is making me sentimental too." I said. "But it's strange, because, I mean, it's hard to have so much of my past feel so up in the air. I would never, ever, blame or resent you for my past. I just wish I could have had both." I was half-saying it to make things seem like we were having a normal conversation, but I also wanted Jane to know how I felt before she answered the question.

"I appreciate that, so much Bella. I love you, and even though you would have every right to resent me and your mother, I am selfish enough to be glad that you don't." I took a deep breath, which I hoped seemed like an emotional moment. Then I said it.

"I just can't believe all of the new things that Edward told me. All of the developments in the case? I can't believe them, you know. I can't believe they're trying to pin everything on you." Jane was still for so long that I thought she maybe didn't pick up my question. But then, as I saw tears welling up in her eyes, I felt her stroke my palm once again. Yes.

"But it doesn't matter, like I said. I love you and I know you and mom loved me and kept me safe my whole life that's what's more important." I said. I meant it. But inside my head was reeling, and part of my wanted to run, or cry, or do something.

Jane had kidnapped me. My Aunt Jane who made sure that I was always looked after and safe and happy, had climbed into a strangers' home and taken their baby across the country to her sister. I didn't know how to feel. I couldn't even ask her to explain, because it would take just one wrong person overhearing and everything could be in serious trouble.

"Bella, I think that maybe you need to process what…Edward told you before we can talk about it. Can you do that for me?"

"You're kicking me out?" I hated how my voice rose in pitch. Jane shook her head.

"No Bella, never. I want you to stay. But as your aunt I need to look out for you. Now, can your therapist make an appointment for you ASAP?" Jane asked. I nodded.

"Good. That's someone who you can talk to about how you're feeling" by which I knew she meant that Kate was the only person who wouldn't tell the prosecution. Even though I knew that neither Alice nor Angela was that invested, I didn't want to put them in a position to feel like they knew too much.

"Now, one more thing?"

"Alright."

"I know you know that your mother loves you, Isabella. I know that you know that somewhere out there my sister is sitting alone, wondering where her baby is and if she'll do well without you. But Bella, that's not something that you need to worry about. I know you ignore me when I say this, but us being here is not that bad. It's worth it." She paused, and I was surprised to see my Aunt Jane tearing up.

"Bella, I would do everything all over again exactly the same because it led me to you. You were our dream, and you have been the light of my life. Truly. And Bella that goes for your mom as well. Please, please always remember that Tanya loves you more than anything. She loves you more than life itself, and she always will. Even if she's continents away."

Then I was tearing up too, and we sat together holding hands and crying softly for a few minutes. When I started to get tired, I stood up.

"Time to go?" Jane asked, though her tears. I nodded.

"How could I have ever had a life without my beautiful genius?" She asked. We got one more hug, so we took it. As we did, Jane kissed me on my cheek.

"We love you Bella, and that made this all worth it. I hope you talk to your therapist this week, like you said you would." I smiled.

"I will."

I went directly home after visiting Jane, and in the comfort and safety of the guest bedroom I dialed in.

"Yes this is Isabella. No, I actually would like to make another appointment, for as soon as possible. Tomorrow? Yes, that's perfect. Thank you." I didn't like Kate's receptionist, and I was glad to get off the phone with her. More important in my mind was my excitement over the fact that I would be living up to the promise I made my aunt, and the knowledge that somewhere out there Tanya was still loved me.

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**A/N: Because I know that some of you are going to be upset with Bella, I just want to say something. Some of the things that Jane says to Bella in this chapter are very emotionally predatory. In my head she is not doing this on purpose, though some of you may have a different opinion. But please to everyone reading this remember that you do not owe anybody anything for loving you, and it is not okay if someone makes you feel that way.**


	24. Chapter 23

**A/N: Hey everyone! I'm back at school, which should (hopefully) mean I get back on a consistent writing schedule. A lot of you are going to disagree with Bella in this chapter but hopefully you'll get a better insight into her head and at least you can understand where she is and where she needs to be. Thank you for your reviews, they mean everything to me. Sorry it took me so long to respond this time, I was traveling. **

**I don't own this world or these characters, just my plot. **

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By the time I got into Kate's office the next day, I felt like I had made my peace with what Jane had told me. In a strange way, her quiet revelation left me feeling very fortunate. I still didn't know Jane's reasons behind everything she did, except for love for her sister. But it was that all-consuming, unflinchingly loyal love that I had grown up with that empowered me to feel like I could take on the world.

When I walked into Kate's office, I think she expected me to be a wreck. She had a large box of tissues sitting on her desk, and she never displays tissues unless she thinks someone will really need them. But I came in with a smile on my face, and I think it threw her for a loop.

"Did you think more about what I said?" Kate asked, looking at me warily as I sat down.

"I did one better. I got an answer." Kate nodded, still looking at me like she was waiting for the shoe to drop.

"Okay, you don't have to tell me what happened. But, I am a bit concerned by your lack of emotion."

"I just, I mean, yes. Yes Jane was the one who kidnapped me. But getting the answer wasn't as important as I thought it was."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I think what I needed was just to know that she was willing to give me the truth. That's always been my relationship with my mom and with Jane. Honest." Kate sighed at my words, eyes closed like she was bracing herself for something.

"We're back to calling her your mother?" She asked. I blinked, I hadn't even realized I'd said that.

"I mean…" I trailed off, not sure what to say.

"What did you and Jane talk about?" Kate asked, brushing some of her hair back where it had escaped her ponytail.

"I talked about the developments with everything. I found a way to ask her, and she gave me an answer. But Kate, she looked so, devastated. She looked like she thought I was going to hate her. And she just kept reminding me how much she and my mom, both, love me. It was really comforting to think about that, to think about Tanya somewhere out in the world missing me."

Kate closed her eyes, taking deep breaths. When she opened them, I knew I wasn't going to like what she had to say.

"Bella, I know that you have a very strong emotional bond with Jane and with Tanya. Of course you do. If you didn't, there would be something wrong with you. But it concerns me that you are drawing your comfort right now from the two of them."

"Why?"

"Because, for one thing they are not going to be in your life for much longer. They need to go to prison. But also Bella, because I don't want you caring about them to eclipse you being able to process what they did."

"I'm processing it just fine." I said, a bit too quickly.

"That's my point, Bella. I don't want you to get defensive about them. To me that suggests that you aren't really considering the truth of the situation or the ramifications of it. At some point Bella we're going to have to start working towards you being able to let them go."

"Why? You just said that it isn't your job to make me feel a certain way, Kate."

"I'm not trying to make you feel anything, Bella. I just want to make sure that you're considering the truth."

"I know that what they did was wrong but it's not like they were abusive parents. Jane and Tanya loved me, and they really took care of me." Kate frowned as I spoke.

"Okay, maybe today is not the day for this conversation. On a different note, how is your restoration project coming?"

"Nessie's boyfriend Jake is a mechanic, and he might be willing to let us both help him restore some motorcycles. Neither of us knows how to ride them, but Nessie is willing to give it a try if I am."

"Alright, so you're still cultivating a relationship with your sister?"

"Yeah. Absolutely."

"What about your parents?" Kate only ever used the word parents when she was trying to prod me into opening up. Suddenly, I wasn't having it.

"Can you not Kate, please? Yesterday was a good thing for me."

"You don't want to answer the question?"

"I don't want you to call them my parents."

"What do you want to call them?"

"See? Don't do that. I shouldn't have to feel bad for being – I can't just suddenly erase Tanya and Jane from my mind."

"Okay, Bella."

"No, it's not okay. I'm just tired of feeling so conflicted. If I was adopted, nobody would ever say that Tanya and Jane weren't my real parents, even if I did meet my birth parents. I just, I'm not ready and I don't want to try to figure that all out. I can't. Not while Jane might go to prison. That's what I need to focus on."

"Alright." I could tell that Kate didn't agree. She was frowning, but she didn't say anything else.

"What are you worried about, with Jane going to prison?"

"I know that she doesn't want me to feel guilty. I know that realistically, this isn't my fault. But I think part of me still feels like if I had just kept it together that night I would never have had to deal with this."

"Isabella, do you really think that – especially with your sister living here too – this whole thing would have never come to light in any other way?"

"Maybe not in a way that would end with people going to prison!"

"Is that what's upsetting you? The thought of Jane going to prison? Or is it finding out at all?"

"I don't" I knew there was no point saying I didn't know, because Kate would just keep me talking. So I took a second to think about it, really think about it. Kate let me think, waiting patiently as though I wasn't taking forever to speak.

"It's both. But in different ways. I liked my life, and it's really difficult trying to figure out how I should feel about everything, and how I do feel about everything. This has made my life more complicated in so many ways. It's not just finding out. It's the trial, moving out of my apartment, Edward, trying to start a relationship with all these people. I feel like every time I think I know how I feel about something, I'm completely wrong."

I paused, the tissues on Kate's desk looking a lot better than when I first sat down.

"But also, I hate that Jane is going to be on trial. And I hate that I hate it. And I hate it even more because it's so public. Do you know what I found out yesterday? Because I'm an adult, the press will be allowed in the trial room. So either I can not go to avoid the press, and leave Jane completely alone, or I can go and be absolutely mobbed by the press. And I know that if I go and support Jane it's going to come across badly, but if I go and I don't support Jane I can't live with myself. But I don't side against the Swans just because I don't want Jane to go to prison. Nothing I can do will win." I said.

"Do you have an idea of what might make it easier?"

"Banning all press from the room."

"I'm not sure that's within my power or your power, although you can ask Edward. Anything else you can think of?"

"Sending two of me to the court room to support Jane and the Swans."

"Why do you feel you need to publically declare a side?"

"Because I have to?" I said.

"No. You can show up with your friends by your side, sit in the room away from both parties, and not say a word. Nobody can make your thoughts or your intentions public unless you share them."

"But I don't want anyone to put words in my mouth. And I think the real problem is that I feel like I need to pick a side."

As was typical with me and Kate, I didn't realize I felt that way until I said it out loud.

We talked about that, to both of our frustration, for the rest of our hour. Kate tried to get me to think about why I felt the need to pick a side, but I just talked around in circles until I didn't want to talk any more. Without knowing why I felt like that, I didn't know how I wanted to handle it. And unfortunately, as Kate and I agreed, I was never getting my old life back. As much as I wanted to make it all go away, I had to work to build a new normal. But until everything settled down, it was clear that I wasn't in a place to build a new normal. I left Kate's office feeling decidedly more dejected than when I entered.

On my way back to the Cullen's house, I decided to drop by Jasper's. I knew Alice would be on her way back when I arrived, but I needed to talk to someone. When I got to his place I parked and stood outside, feeling like a weirdo. Some older woman took pity on me and let me in, so I stood outside Jasper's apartment waiting for one of them to get home.

Jasper was first, and he looked at me curiously as he let me in.

"You could have called." He said, sounding unusually hurt.

"I was fine waiting it out." I said, trying not to look at him funny. Obviously it didn't work, because he ran a hand over his face.

"Look, I know Alice tells you guys everything – so if you have something to say –"

"She didn't tell us anything! About, whatever." I said, cutting him off with a shake of my head. Whatever was going on, I didn't want him to feel obligated to say anything.

"Bella, am I a terrible person for not believing in marriage? Marrying my dad destroyed my mom. It left her bitter, and lonely, and she felt trapped with him. I know I can spend the rest of my life with Alice but if things change I don't ever want one of us to feel like we can't get out of it because we're married. I'm not, I don't think that's crazy." His voice got heated, and I felt so uncomfortable. It was the most vulnerable I had ever seen Jasper, and I knew I was not in a place to handle it. Still, I tried to pull myself together and approach it how I thought Kate would.

"So you think Alice isn't capable of loving you forever?" I asked, and then winced at how bad that sounded.

"I think everyone thinks that they're capable. They think that they know. My last serious girlfriend before Alice thought that she knew we were meant to be and then we broke up because we grew apart. And I feel so much more strongly for Alice than I felt for her, but that just means that if one of us feels like it's not worth it the other person would be devastated. Adding a marriage to that complicates everything."

"Okay, well, what about the opposite side? I mean, you need to put a lot of hard work into any relationship but at least with a marriage it's like you're both promising to try? I don't know, Jasper. Why don't you talk to Alice about this?"

"I tried to, but it came out wrong and it came across like I was saying we weren't meant to be and I don't know how to fix that."

"Can you tell her that you think it's meant to be even if you never get married?"

"She won't agree."

"It might still be nice to know if that's how you feel. I – well yeah." I was cut off by the sound of a key in the lock, and Jasper got up and made his way to the bedroom as the door opened. Alice walked in with a smile on her face, and when she saw me it brightened.

"Bella!" She dropped her bag by the door and practically ran to give me a hug.

"How have you been? I feel like I haven't talked to you in forever."

"I talked to Jasper." I blurted. She sighed.

"Let me guess, he's in the room." She said, rolling her eyes. She didn't look upset which confused me. She pulled me over to the couch, and we both took a seat.

"Bella, for once I think Jasper is taking a fight harder than me. He thinks this marriage thing is going to be a deal breaker, and it's really not. Not right now. And I think once he realizes that, it's not going to be as scary to him. But he has to work through that by himself." She shrugged, and I wanted to pinch myself. Not to say that Alice is ever over-dramatic, but she has a flair for drama and I knew marriage was a big deal for her. She laughed at the look on my face.

"You can partly thank Cynthia. I called her after we fought and asked her what to do, and she asked me if I would leave Jasper if he told me point blank that he was never, ever going to marry me. Not as a blow off, not as an idea, but like if that was how our fight had ended and he absolutely meant it. And I think once I realized that the answer was no, really and honestly no, not hypothetically but in real life, I stopped worrying about it."

"Does he know that?" I asked. Alice rolled her eyes again.

"No. He's avoiding the topic. There's stuff he needs to work through and I can't do that for him. It's crazy. We haven't had sex in like five days." I shook my head, but inside I felt relieved. Alice was clearly doing a lot better than Jasper, and I appreciated that she was trying to give him space. It was a lot different to her usual approach of dealing with issues or conflicts.

"Anyways, you didn't come here to talk about my boyfriend. What's going on?" As I told her about my talk with Kate, the mood of the room fell dramatically. Alice sighed.

"We need Angela here for this." She said, when I was done. "What! Don't look at me like that. She's going to disagree with me and then we can all have a conversation about it. That's a lot more helpful than just getting my opinion." And then she was on the phone calling Angela.

"Hey, can you do dinner tonight? Bella's pick." I blinked at her, and she waved me away.

"Come on Ang, it's like a serious dinner. Bella needs to talk. Yeah, no you know how she is. No this is definitely a both of us type of conversation." I scowled at her mention of me, but Alice just stuck her tongue out at me.

"Where do you want to eat?" She asked, barely even moving the phone away from her mouth.

"Can we do that burger place?" Alice made a face, but she nodded.

"Burgers." She said, and I could hear Angela's excited "Yes!" It made me feel a bit better.

Twenty minutes later, I pulled into the parking lot behind Alice, and we got a table as we waited for Angela. After we ordered, Alice giving the waitress the most complicated salad order ever, I filled Angela in.

"Let's say it on three." Angela said, looking at Alice. "One, two"

"I agree with Kate." "I agree with Bella."

"You go first Alice." Angela smiled.

"Well, I mean I get it. I think it's unfair to call them your parents if you're trying to have a relationship with your real parents. But other than that, I mean they did raise you. I think trying to let go of them like that relationship never existed is just going to make you feel worse."

"That's not what Kate was saying, I don't think." Angela cut in.

"I think she just means that you're not going to ever have any peace or feel any better if you act like that's a relationship that you are still cultivating. I mean, we don't know what's going to happen with Jane. But if Tanya ever comes back to the US she is going to be arrested. They committed a serious crime. And you need to be able to accept that and let go of needing them in your life so that you can move forward with your life where it is right now."

Both of them looked at me, and I shrugged.

"I thought this would help, but I don't want to talk about it anymore. Angela, how's Ben?"

So, for the rest of our dinner, we talked relationships. Angela talked about how she still hadn't told anyone she worked with that she was dating Ben, even though he didn't work with them or anything, in case they thought it was favoritism. But, he'd been bugging her about when he was going to get to meet her family. I knew the fact that they were even talking about that was pretty serious, because Angela typically never wanted to introduce anyone to her family.

Alice recapped enough of what was going on to clue Angela in, but again she was seemingly entirely unbothered about Jasper. It was a weird mix for their relationship, but I had to trust that Alice knew what she was doing. When we all went our separate ways, Angela stopped me with a hand on my arm.

"Bella, I know you guys are trying to stay professional or whatever, but maybe this is something to talk to Edward about." She said. I smiled and nodded, but later I really thought about it.

As I got ready for bed, saying goodnight to Carlisle and Esme, I sent him a text asking to meet him in his office to talk. He texted me back almost immediately, saying I could come in any time after noon.


	25. Chapter 24

**A/N At the end this time. I do not own Twilight, or I would not be living on campus this year. **

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I drove up to the police station at about half past noon the next day, relieved to see that no press were around. The biggest question was about where I'd disappeared to, and some of the more fanatical tabloids were reporting that I was secretly living with Tanya. But it was a ghost town at the station.

I let myself in, getting the all-clear that Edward wasn't busy before walking down to his office. In the time since I'd last been there nothing had changed on the outside. I knocked twice, and he opened the door. Immediately Edward pulled me into his office, shut the door, closed the blinds on the door window, and pulled me into a hug. He let out one long, tired breath.

"If I never have to talk to Didyme again it'll be too soon. She's like a viper. She's trying to get me to beef up my testimony to make it more incriminating, but nothing she's done is outright or illegal so I can't call her on it." He exhaled again, before leading me to the desk. I wasn't used to Edward touching me so much, so I let myself enjoy it. I knew I should probably say something, but I didn't exactly want him to let go.

"I just needed to get that out. What do you need?" Edward asked, looking over me. Suddenly, it seemed like an incredibly bad idea to be there with him in his office. I wanted to say I needed him, but for once my thoughts stayed in my head where they belonged. Instead I took a step back, and to his credit Edward let me go.

"I was talking to Kate, and then to Alice and Angela. And I guess I just wanted to get your input too, on whether or not you think I'm holding on to Tanya and Jane too tightly, and if I need to start letting them go?"

"Yeah. If that's what Kate said, I agree with her." It was so blunt, so honest, that I felt almost a bit winded. I sat down quickly in one of the chairs.

"Oh." I exhaled heavily. He looked at me warily, frowning.

"Sorry, that was probably – I could have said that better." He moved to sit on the edge of his desk, in front of me.

"No, I appreciate your honesty" I said shaking my head. "But I disagree."

"I figured." Something about the expression on his face, like he was rolling his eyes internally, put me a bit on edge.

"I can't just disregard Tanya and Jane. They raised me. They're the reason I'm where I am today, in all of the good ways and in all of the bad ways. And whether or not it should have happened, it did happen. I was kidnapped. I did grow up as a Denali. That's a part of me."

"That's a part of your past, yes. But that doesn't mean you need to drag it with you as baggage for the rest of your life."

"But that's my point. How would you feel if someone called Carlisle and Esme your baggage? This whole situation sucks. But they're – they're not my biological parents but they are my parents. Or not, that's not the right word. But they raised me." Edward made a face when I talked about his parents, but that was the point. I needed him to actually see it my way.

"Bella, that's not the same thing."

"Why? Tomorrow, you could find out that you were adopted – or, or anything. All I'm trying to say is that you wouldn't suddenly feel differently about them. And I doubt you could just let go of all of the good memories, all of the things they did for you, everything."

"I don't think that's what Kate wants you to let go of. But Bella, you can't have Jane and Tanya back. Not the way you had them before. Even if Jane's verdict is innocent and she's released, you'll still know that she's not your aunt. You'll still be that girl. So you – you just, it's really important for you to be able to leave those memories in the past and move forward with your life. With Charlie and Renee Swan who love you."

"Okay, first, they're not replacement parents. That's definitely not how this is going to go. Charlie and Renee aren't going to fill the spot left by Tanya and Jane. They have their own spot." I stood up, jabbing him in the chest with my finger. He grabbed onto my hand, moving it out of range.

"Bella, that's not what I was trying to say." He frowned at me, still holding tight to my hand like he was afraid I was going to hit him.

"But that's what it feels like! It kind of feels like everyone expects me to move on with my brand new, old, whatever with the Swans as if they're just going to pick up the parent stick and keep running. I can't do that."

Edward opened his mouth to say something, closed it, and then sighed. He scrubbed his free hand over his face, and suddenly I was really aware of how close we were to each other. I got distracted by looking over his face; it took me a minute to make eye contact and realize he was watching me stare at him.

"Bella, I don't expect you to do that. I just want to feel confident that the life you're living right now is – Bella, I really need you to stop looking at me like that."

"Like what?"

"You know." He said. I did know. I shook my head.

"Like you don't remember why this can't happen." I was pretty openly staring at his lips at this point, as he spoke. He was still holding onto my hand, squeezing pretty tightly.

"No, I remember." I said finally, because there was no use lying.

"You can keep going. The life I'm living? Go on."

"I just don't want you to get bogged down in the past when you still have the entire rest of your life ahead of you. It's not about forgetting about them, just, don't hold on to them and drag them forward with you either."

"I disagree." I said, looking down at where our hands sat on the table next to him.

"I don't think I'm holding on too much." I moved our hands to sit on his upper thigh.

"What started this whole thing?"

"I was calling Tanya my mom again. But I couldn't help it. I went to see Jane and she just kept reminding me how much she loves me and how much my – how much Tanya loves me. It's a lot to process." I was rubbing our hands up and down his leg, and watching myself do it.

"Wait, say that again?" Edward's voice was lower, rougher. I looked up, and he was looking at our hands too, at me really.

"I'm sorry." I said, and before he could ask why I leaned up and kissed him. I wish I could say that it was frantic, that we were throwing caution to the wind, but it wasn't. It was very deliberate, slow, and probably a bit needy on my end. We had already acknowledged that it was a bad idea. We were very clearly doing it anyways.

Edward groaned, low and deep in his throat. I pulled back to kiss his jaw, then right near his ear and down his neck. I kissed a spot by his pulse point and he grabbed me by the ass and pulled me in closer to him, so I was standing right between his legs. He gave me a good squeeze before he brought one hand back up and around, and this time he didn't hesitate to cup my breast. He was still holding me close to him, and he leaned down to whisper in my ear.

"This has to be it, Bella. Really." I combatted his words by sucking hard on his pulse point, causing him to curse under his breath and squeeze me tighter.

"You're not going to make this easy for me."

"I –" I started to respond, but I was cut off by a knock on his door. It was worse than Esme coming home, like an immediate bucket of cold water was dumped on us as we sprang apart. Edward cleared his throat a few times, and I let myself fall back into the seat.

"Who is it?" He asked, and I couldn't decide if his voice sounded normal enough. I looked at his neck guiltily, and though the bruise was just starting to discolor I knew I'd have left him with a pretty noticeable hickey. I felt dumb and guilty especially as the door opened, Edward jumping to his feet.

Didyme breezed in, and I tried not to look at her and focus on not blushing.

"Oh, Bella, lovely to see you." To her credit she sounded genuine, even though I still didn't like her calling me by my nickname.

"You know, I hope I'm not overstepping to say that you look so much like your sister it's ridiculous." I looked up at her and smiled as believably as I could.

"Thank you." I said. If she noticed the tension between me and Edward, or in the room, she didn't let it show. She walked over to us, to where Edward was now leaning on the side of his desk.

"I hope you don't mind me popping in for a quick second Edward, just trying to make sure that I've considered every angle of your statement as best as possible. Again, we just can't believe how reserved your language is – are you sure this is the way you're going to say it on the stand?"

"I'm pretty sure, yes." She sighed, laying a hand on his arm.

"Alright, well then everyone is coming up with some questions, so we'll be in touch within the next two days."

"I know, that's what you told me when we had our meeting this morning." There was a bit of an edge in Edward's voice which was making it harder for me to remember why I'd let go of him in the first place. Especially when Didyme ran her fingers across his neck where my lips had been minutes ago.

"Looks like you have some kind of a bruise. I didn't notice earlier, does it hurt?" Edward coughed, grabbing Didyme's hand and removing it from his neck.

"I was messing around and things went a little too far. I guess Masen got the best of me." When Didyme wasn't looking he quickly raised an eyebrow at me. I shrugged apologetically, and then she was speaking again.

"Anyways, I hope I didn't bother you. My team just really, really wants to be sure." She beamed at him. Didyme was not unattractive, especially youthful for her mid-thirties. But Edward was completely unaffected.

"I mean, you kind of interrupted something important but I'm sure that wasn't your intention." She looked between me and Edward like she was just noticing that I was there, and then her eyes widened. It looked incredibly insincere and I wanted to tell her she wasn't fooling anyone, but I could be polite.

"I apologize. I'll get out of your hair." She smiled and walked out of the room, closing the door behind her. Then Edward looked at me.

"Bella…" He trailed off. I looked at him.

"Technically, aren't you already off my case? I know you have to testify, but everything is wrapped up, right?" I knew I had to look slightly pathetic I was so desperate for him to say yes. He shook his head.

"I'm on the case until Jane's verdict is reached."

"Oh, okay. No."

"Huh?" He asked. I shook my head.

"That's not going to work. I'm sorry, that's not going to work." I was joking, but he didn't as much as smile, looking pensive and a bit troubled instead. When he didn't say anything, I walked back over to him, grasping his hands. As I looked around the room, at what he'd set up, I realized why it was a hard decision for him.

"I don't really mean that. I was completely joking. I'm not trying to be insensitive. I know that if you go off the case it hurts your agency."

"Actually no." Edward rubbed a hand across his neck, and the tips of his ears darkened a bit.

"What do you mean no?" I asked.

"Well, it turns out that all of the press on this case isn't entirely a terrible thing for my agency. I've been speaking to a few other detectives who are interested in working with me now that I have kind of a name. Masen's looking to get into detective work – though I'd never start him off on a case this big. But I also have two other guys that I'd like to work with who have more experience."

"Wow…" I said.

"Sorry I didn't tell you, I wasn't trying to keep it a secret or anything, it just didn't come up. And I was kind of scared that if I admitted that I had an out, I'd do something really irresponsible."

I smiled.

"I think we're past that point. So tell me, is it really an option for you to call up one of those detectives?" He paused for a long time and I could tell he was really thinking about it. Then he looked at me.

"You're going to like Sam." I smiled and leaned in, sliding my arms around his waist to his back, and pulling myself closer to him. But he was the one who moved first, kissing my forehead.

"We're not off the hook yet. When I bring Sam in, see if he wants to do this, see if everything works out, then we can talk about this. Not yet." I frowned, but I nodded.

"Alright, then I'm really looking forward to meeting Sam."

Two days later, I was pulling up to actually meet Sam. This time, my luck wasn't as solid. There was a news van parked outside of the station, and when the cameraman caught sight of me he sprang to his feet with the camera, cuing up the anchorman who was eating a sandwich.

"Isabella. Isabella. Any new developments on the case? Nobody knows what to make of your silence and sources report that you've been visiting Jane in prison. Are you team Denali?" I knew that I would be upset with myself later, but I had to speak up.

"It's really sick that all of you are preying on me during the worst, most stressful and upsetting time in my life just to satisfy some sadistic curiosity." I said as I entered the building, letting the door slam behind me. I didn't look back, just walked straight to Edward's office. It was strange that he wasn't waiting for me outside, but I figured he was with Sam. When I got to the office, I knocked.

"Come in." That wasn't Edward's voice. I walked in hesitantly.

Edward was sitting behind his desk, but leaning on the side of it was a tall man with dark bronzed skin and shoulder length black hair. He stuck out a hand as I walked in.

"So, you're the reason I am now employed by Cullen over here?" He said. I looked between him and Edward, warily.

"He needed to know." Edward said, letting me grasp the situation without drawing out the explanation. I felt my face get slightly warm, but I reached out and shook his hand.

"I'm Bella." I said. Sam smiled.

"Sam. Nice to meet you." He laughed a bit as he said it, giving my hand one last firm shake before letting go.

"Now, what do you want to know about me that's going to make this transition easier?" He asked.

"Why do you want to work with Edward?" I asked. Sam laughed again.

"Great, to the point. I like that. We're going to get along. Your boy is a good man, and he's done a lot by himself. I'm pretty impressed, when I was his age I hadn't even decided to get into detective work yet. He already has his specialization, and a good head on his shoulders. With more detectives with a connection to Washington police departments, which I have, I think he's got a good shot. And I like working missing persons' cases, but I'm more adult focused than Cullen. He told me about how he dealt with you in the beginning."

I looked to Edward again, who wasn't meeting my eye. I couldn't tell if he felt guilty or embarrassed, but I was learning too much from Sam to pause and tell Edward that he didn't need to feel either.

"So you think you guys have a good shot?" I asked. Sam laughed again.

"Edward's already making waves for having to deal with Didyme. Everyone knows what she's like, even with married guys." It hadn't occurred to me that Didyme didn't want Edward specifically, but it made sense. Sam misunderstood the look on my face and held up his hands.

"Not gonna work on me either. I've been married to the love of my life for five years." There was his ring, shining.

"Still, she can be pretty persuasive when she wants to be. It's her specialty, pushing things without breaking the rules. Sometimes I think she enjoys it more than she likes putting people in prison." He sneered, and I realized that apparently disliking Didyme wasn't an uncommon experience. It made me like Sam more.

"So, I knew you had to be pretty special because not only was he not fazed by her but he's actually giving someone else the case."

"I like him." I said to Edward, winking. Then I turned to Sam again.

"So what exactly are you responsible for at this point?"

"I know it probably doesn't seem like it but Edward does a lot of back-end things to attempt to piece together what happened. I'm going to be taking over that job, so I'll probably meet with Jane and with the Swans and read over Edward's notes to familiarize myself. Edward will still have to appear in court because of his expertise and what he's already done, but most of the questioning will come to me. Where you're concerned, the only interaction we really have to have is if something comes up and I have some questions. Which reminds me, can you write down how you want to be contacted?"

"Oh, sure." I said, writing down my cell number. Sam gave me his professional number, and I programmed it into my phone. I knew that Sam was coming into it at a very different time when I was much more agreeable, but the difference between Sam and Edward was obvious. Hearing Sam describe his responsibilities, I felt bad for ever believing that Edward's concern about me was because of his job.

"Well, apparently I have an office to set up." Sam straightened up and smiled. Edward stood too, slapping him on the back before Sam walked out of the room. Before he stepped outside, he turned around and faced us.

"You're officially off the hook Cullen. Enjoy your girl." He winked as he stepped out. I turned to face Edward but before I had even turned completely around his lips were on mine and his arms were around me in possibly the most intense kiss I'd ever received in my life. When he pulled back he was panting.

"I'll see you at dinner tonight Bella." There was so much promise in his eyes that I almost didn't make it back to my car in one piece. It took me another few seconds before I caught my breath enough to drive home.

* * *

**A/N: Disclaimer I am like the least sexy person you will ever meet and that probably reflects in any of my attempts to write anything remotely sexy so I apologize if this came across as more awkward than alluring - it's something I'm working on. Any and all feedback is welcome. I also really want to apologize for not posting last weekend. Being back has been crazy, not at all calm like I had expected. But things are settling down and I am getting back on track, I promise. Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed – I didn't get to respond to all of you like I normally do but I love reading your thoughts and I hope you keep sending them!**


	26. Chapter 25

Despite having a green light, Edward and I did not immediately jump into our relationship. For the first two weeks, he was busy transitioning Sam. Apparently Sam's quip that I didn't know what all Edward had to do wasn't a joke, because they were constantly busy. We said that once everything was settled we would have "the conversation" and then move forward from there.

When he finally felt confident that Sam was settled, Edward told me that he was going to come stay at his parents' for a few days so to take a break from all of the work before he had to start looking for his next case. It hadn't even occurred to me that Edward didn't have the luxury of just being done when he wasn't working with me, although it made sense. It made me feel kind of bad, as even though I was still working it was all work that I could do whenever I felt like it – as long as it got done.

Still I was excited for him to come stay with us at the house. He hadn't told his parents why he was handing over the case, and they hadn't asked. I thought that Esme might have suspected that something was up but neither of them said anything about it at all. I was looking forward to the first week of September.

The first wrench in our plan was that Esme found out that Masen had the week off and invited him to come stay at the house while Edward stayed. She said that it would be fun to have both boys at home. Since none of the three of us could think of a valid reason for Masen to refuse we just had to grin and bear it. To his credit, even Masen knew how awkward it would be with him there. He promised to leave us alone as much as possible.

In the end though, Masen's presence ended up being the least of our problems. Two days before Edward and Masen were supposed to come to the house, the judge for the case announced the court date, and everything went crazy.

I woke up that morning to my phone going off and someone knocking on my door.

"Bella, sweetheart, please wake up. I think my son is going to pinch his nose off of his face if he can't reach you soon."

"What's going on?" I asked, as I sat up. "You can come in." I clearly hadn't been very aware, because it wasn't Esme but Carlisle that walked in. I barely had a second to be self-conscious before I noticed the look on his face. Seeing Carlisle worried was jarring. I scrambled out of bed, thankful that I'd slept in sweatpants rather than bare-legged under my tee shirt.

"Okay, I'm sorry, what's going on?" I said, reaching for my phone.

"It has something to do with the case. Edward was outside and being mobbed by reporters when he called me, but if you call him back he should be inside by now."

"Wait, reporters at…okay, yeah. I'll call him back." Glancing at my phone, I had six missed calls starting at seven in the morning. I immediately dialed him back, glancing again at Carlisle. He seemed to be unsure of whether he was supposed to stay or leave, hovering just inside my doorway.

"Hello, Bella?" Edward picked up. I could hear Sam's voice in the background, speaking with someone.

"Hey Edward, what's –" "We have a court date!" Edward cut me off.

"Okay?" I asked, wondering what the fuss was about.

"The judge moved the case way, way up ahead of projections. The first date is going to be September 15th. Are my parents still home?"

"I'm here with your dad."

"Great. Okay, tell him I won't be coming home. I need to – there's no way Sam can take over this case within the next two weeks. So he's working on a new development that we have up in northern Washington and I'm going to have to see this through."

Remember how I hate surprises? This did nothing to make that better. And as Edward kept speaking, the punches kept coming.

"Charlie and Renee are coming back to Seattle for the case and Didyme wants to talk to them without you there so I really think you should call them." My mind was racing, I didn't even know how to process everything that he was saying.

"Bella are you still with me?"

"Is that it?" I asked, trying to sound put together. Carlisle took a hesitant step closer to me, and I knew that I must have sounded as bad as I felt.

"Look, Bella I'm sorry about, this week and dumping this on you so suddenly. But I have to go. I have a lot of things that I have to do now. I know that we have to talk, but now isn't an ideal time."

"Okay." I said.

"Okay good, Bye Bella." He hung up before I could say anything back and I was left standing in shock.

"Are you alright?" Carlisle asked. I stared at him, still trying to process everything.

"They uh, they moved up the trial date. It's in two weeks. Edward doesn't think Sam can handle transitioning the case and everything so Sam's working on, I don't know, but Edward's not coming here anymore." There was a long pause, then Carlisle frowned and walked over to me.

"I'm sorry sweetheart. I know how much you were looking forward to this week." I didn't know how to take that sentence, but I decided to just take the sympathy. Carlisle tentatively held his arms open for a hug, which I accepted. He smelled kind of like Edward – like they used different colognes but the underlying smell was almost the same. It was so comforting I was genuinely surprised. I relaxed a bit.

"I have to leave for the hospital, but please call me if you need anything, alright? Or Esme. I know she's better at these things than me but we both care about you Bella." I nodded, and as Edward walked out of the room, my phone rang again. I looked down to see Masen on the phone.

"Edward just called me."

"Yeah, it's crazy, right? But you should still come. I'm sure Esme would still love to have you." I said, trying to keep my voice light. Masen sighed.

"No dummy, I mean he called me about that too. But he called to ask me to make sure you were okay." I frowned.

"Masen, at some point you're going to have to stop being a go-between for me and Edward. And I'm not saying it's all his fault either, but talking to you about Edward is not really the same thing as talking to Edward. And we're pretty bad at that, clearly."

"What do you want me to tell him then?" Masen asked. I shrugged, then I remembered he couldn't see me.

"Nothing." I said. "Don't like, purposely not speak to him or anything but if he asks how I am, maybe remind him that he can send a text even if he can't call, and that like, he can't avoid a fight by not talking to me."

"Is it going to be a fight?" Masen asked, but by his tone I could tell he was asking for himself, not for Edward.

"Well, that depends on if he takes your advice." I said. Masen laughed.

"Literally every time I talk to you I'm glad he met you."

"Well, I'm glad I met him so I can have you as a friend. Which is why I think you should still come stay with us."

"Fine, you wore me down. I definitely wasn't planning on coming for your gourmet dinners and the company of three of my favorite people in the world, but what you said just now sealed the deal." He laughed, but I was touched. It was nice to be one of his favorite people, even if he was kidding around. My phone beeped loudly in my ear, and I looked down.

"Hold on, I have a call coming in." I said to Masen. I thought it would be Alice or Angela, maybe Esme, or maybe even Edward. Instead, it was Renee Swan.

"Masen, I have to go. Bye." I said.

"Bye Bella." He said, not asking questions. I hung up on him, and picked up Renee's call.

"Hello?"

"Hi Bella."

"Guess you got the news this morning." Renee laughed, but it was a very humorless laugh. I knew how she felt.

"Yeah, I'm still trying to process it."

"I hope it didn't throw too much of a wrench in your plans." I paused, unsure if I'd talked about Edward and Masen coming to stay the last time I'd talked to Charlie and Renee. I had only made the trek out to Forks one other time, and in the interim we'd mostly been speaking on the phone. But it didn't matter. I didn't mind if Renee and Charlie knew that Edward and I were involved nearly as much as I minded if Esme and Carlisle knew.

"Well, Edward and Masen were supposed to come stay at the house this week, but now Edward's back on the case and everything is so confused. I don't know what's going on."

"Oh, that stinks, I'm sorry. Were you going to do anything with Alice or Angela?"

"Not really, we didn't have anything planned."

"Oh wow, not even a little dinner?"

"Um, no?" I thought about it. Renee was right, it had been a while since the three of us had all met in person.

"Oh, I just would have thought, well, I suppose if Edward was supposed to be there. Tell me if I'm being too nosy, but something is going on there right?"

"I, yes. He was going, we were going to give things a try once he handed over the case. But then this happened and he thinks it's too much for Sam so he's taking everything over. So that's, it wouldn't be ethical I guess."

"Oh, but he could still celebrate your birthday."

"What?"

"Your birthday. He should still come over. If he comes with Masen, it's not like there's anything wrong with that."

"What are you, I don't know what you're talking about."

"The court case, it's two days after your birthday. So I thought that maybe, do you not do much for your birthday?"

"My birthday is in March." I said, but with a sinking feeling I realized that this wasn't true. I heard a loud clattering sound, and then Renee was back.

"Bella, your birthday is, it's not in March. You were born on September 13th. What, you celebrated your birthday in March?"

"Yeah. I always, March 16th. That's, does that day hold any kind of significance for you?"

"No. I mean, by March 16th you were already gone. You were, it was February 9th."

"So I'm, I'm, oh God. Oh my God."

"Bella?"

"No, it makes sense. I was, oh man, I was developmentally behind for so long as a child. That's six months. I've, I've been celebrating the wrong birthday my entire life."

"Bella, I'm so sorry. If I knew that you didn't know, I wouldn't have just sprung that on you."

"No it's, I, I guess I keep thinking that there aren't any more surprises left here. But they just keep coming."

"I can't, I am so sorry."

"No, I'm, I'm happy to know. It just, it's so weird." Renee was silent for a long time, enough for me to think that maybe something had happened to her. Then she sighed.

"Please feel free to say no. But can we, I mean, do you want to celebrate with us?" My first thought was yes, then no, then I wasn't sure. I didn't have anything particularly important going on September 13th, but I didn't want to make a hasty decision. In that moment, I wished I could discuss it with Kate.

Even though I had talked it over with Alice and Angela multiple times, I still felt uncomfortable with what Kate had said. It kept me from seeking her out, even though nearly a month had passed since the argument. She'd sent me one email telling me that I was always welcome if I wanted to talk, and that was it.

"Yes. I'd like that." I finally said.

"Oh. Thank you." Renee's voice was so happy I could almost feel her happiness through the phone. It clearly meant a lot to her, and that made me happy. I hoped that at least it would be fun.

Two days later, Masen arrived at the Cullen home. I was the only one home, but he seemed excited enough as he barreled in, giving me a huge hug before moving into the house.

"Lemme put my bag down, then we can eat whatever that is." He called, already moving in towards the stairs.

"How do you know that's for you?" I asked, even though it totally was. At one point Edward had mentioned that Masen liked ravioli, so I'd spent the morning hand-pressing ravioli squares rather than working on fact-checking an account. I had four different types of fillings and multiple sauces. I meant it to be for him and for Edward, so it was way too much, but I figured that the rest would be a nice surprise for Esme for lunch – and possibly even Carlisle at his clinic if I got around to it.

Masen just laughed, taking the stairs three at a time in his hurry. He wasn't kidding; I had barely made my way back to the ravioli before he came in.

"Holy shit." He said. I looked over my shoulder, and he looked sheepish.

"Sorry. Hey, out of curiosity, you wouldn't want to ditch Cullen and marry me, would you?" He asked, moving forward to the ravioli bar like he was in a trance.

"Where did you find this much ravioli?"

"I made it." I said, trying not to laugh. He rolled his eyes at me.

"Yeah, obviously. But where did you buy it from. And what kind is it?"

"That one's four cheese, this is beef, this one is butternut squash, and this one is sausage. And I literally made them. From scratch."

"Please marry me." He said, eyes wide. I nudged him with my shoulder.

"I might have to, if it takes any longer for this case to end." Masen shrugged.

"Edward is being an idiot. He's too stubborn for his own good. Can I eat?" I had to laugh.

"Go for it." He really went for it. I made myself a plate and went to finally get started on my latest assignment. While I worked he relaxed, which really means he talked. Still, it was nice to have the company.

I was working more slowly than normal, so I gave up around noon and began putting food together for Esme. Masen was doing his best to eat for two grown men, grazing every so often, but there was still enough for Esme and Carlisle. I left Esme ravioli in a Tupperware and a note telling her to take whatever pasta sauce she wanted, and I put together something for Carlisle.

On the way to the clinic, driven by a chatty Masen, I looked at me and Edward's text history. All he'd written was "I'm sorry." But he send it four times. I didn't know what to say. I didn't want to call him, and I didn't have a good response to his texts. I finally just texted back "Ok" for nothing else to say, and he hadn't texted back since. After giving the ravioli to a very appreciative Carlisle, we went back to the house and Masen helped me with a beef stew for dinner.

That night, I couldn't help thinking about what it would have been like if Edward was there. I called Renee and asked her if I could bring people to my birthday, and she said the more the merrier, so I called Alice and Angela to invite them. Then I caught Masen before he went to bed and invited him too. I thought about inviting Edward, but I knew he'd be busy so close to the court date and I didn't want to hear him say no.

The next day I got up ridiculously early to make quiche, and then I told myself I had to actually be productive with work. I locked myself away in my room and got to work, trying my best to be as productive as possible. Unlike most of my other accounts, this one was always meticulously done. It may sound weird to say that I resented that someone else was good at their job, but it made it tedious to check everything knowing that there wouldn't be a mistake. I had to force myself to be hyper-focused anyways because I was more likely to miss something since I assumed there would be no mistakes.

I was so focused, Masen had to come remind me it was lunchtime. He laughed as I put some leftover ravioli together for Esme first before asking what he wanted.

"You know you don't have to do that, right?" He asked. I sighed.

"I know that Esme would never make me do this, but it's what I can do to help out. I want to make sure that she's eating." Masen shook his head at me, smiling so big I thought he would burst out laughing any second.

"That's fine. But it's September. Esme's big push officially ended yesterday. She's been home all day."

"Oh!" I tried to play it off, but I knew I had to be turning at least a bit red.

"Well, never mind then." I said.

"I'll take it!" Masen offered, grinning. I handed him the already-packed ravioli and made myself a sandwich.

"Hard at work?" He asked. I nodded, as I brought my plate down the stairs.

"As much as it pains me to say this, don't worry about dinner then. I can throw something together with Esme. It won't be five star menu quality, but it'll be edible."

It's a mark of how busy and distracted I was that all I said was "Okay, sure," as I kept on moving down the stairs.

It ended up being a blessing that he said that, as on the second-to-last page of the "perfect" report I found an error that ended up being a bit of an Easter egg hunt, as I tried to track down where he could have possibly gotten his numbers from. When I heard the knock on the door, I was halfway through re-doing the calculations on page seven.

"Masen, I think I might just skip dinner tonight." The knocking continued.

"It's not locked." I called, still flipping through.

"Masen, I get that I need a break but I really thought I would finish this tonight and the thought of having to wake up –"

"Bella will you please look at me?" I looked up at the sound of his voice. There was Edward, standing in my doorway, looking sheepish.

"Hey." He said, when I looked up.

"Oh! Hi!" I said, smiling.

"What brings you around these parts?" I said, going for a cowboy accent. It came out horribly, and both of us winced. Still, he came forward and sat on the edge of my bed.

"Sam called me an idiot. He told me that I was being obsessively hands-on and that I needed to back off and let him finish the job. He told me that I was giving up the case for the right reasons, and that I didn't need to worry about him being able to do his job."

"Okay." I said, carefully. I didn't want to assume anything from what he was saying.

"Uh, and Masen talked to me. And he was, you were right. I can't just push off talking to you. It's, I uh, I'm not good at prioritizing sometimes. And I'm not always the best communicator. But you're a priority Bella and I should have made that clear. Anyways, I'm taking my week off. My bag is already upstairs. But I get it if you don't want to talk right now."

I wanted to throw down my work and say screw it. I wanted to have the talk immediately. But it wasn't the time. I stood up, and stood on my toes, and pulled him down for a long kiss.

"I'm happy you're here." I said, because I was. "But we need to have our talk tomorrow."

"I can do that." Edward smiled, and then left. When it was dinner time he brought me down a plate, and came back in an hour to take the empty plate away. But he gave me space to finish what I was working on. I went to bed late, so I let myself sleep in and let everyone fend for themselves for breakfast. I left the room around eleven, and outside in the den Edward and Masen were playing some kind of video game.

I left them to it, grabbing some food from the kitchen before sitting in the den to watch them. But as soon as they noticed my presence Edward paused the game.

"Leave." He told Masen, before moving over to join me on the couch. Masen burst out laughing and flipped Edward off, but he did make his way upstairs.

"So…" He started, but I didn't want to draw it out.

"What are we? To you?"

"I want you to be my girlfriend." He said, just as blunt.

"Okay." I said, smiling. He stared at me.

"Okay as in yes? Or okay as in 'okay glad to know'?" I shook my head at him.

"We really need to talk about this whole communicating thing. Because we're not really, we're not good at it. Either of us."

"Okay, but will you answer my question?" He asked, looking less confident. I smiled.

"Yes. But we really need to talk about" I was cut off as Edward leaned over to kiss me.

"We need to talk it out!" I said, scooting back from him.

"Celebrate first." He gave me a real smile, crooked and dazzling, and I almost lost my train of thought. But then Masen called down the stairs

"Bella's right!" Edward immediately leaned away and before I knew it he'd whipped a pillow at him which Masen just dodged. Masen laughed as he ran back up the stairs.

"Fine." He sighed. So we talked. We talked about how I needed to work on letting him explain himself and not thinking the worst, and he needed to work on actually explaining himself better. We talked about how he couldn't protect me from everything, and I couldn't blame him for the decisions he made if I wasn't willing to be honest about how I felt. Then the three of us spent the day together, me in Edward's lap and everything feeling exactly how it should be.

Resolving things with Edward made me feel like I had to fix things with Kate. I called her office and made an appointment for a few days later. Walking in, I expected her to be upset. But she wouldn't let me apologize. She said that she had been pushing me pretty hard and that it was fine for me to decide that I needed a break. When I told her about the birthday party, about my birthday, and about Edward, she said that we had enough to talk about without worrying about my relationship with Tanya and Jane just yet.


	27. Chapter 26

**A/N: Hey everyone! Two weeks in a row? I know it's been a while since I was consistent, but all I can say is that looking for a job is tough and I'm busier than I thought I would be. I loved reading all of your responses to E+B getting together – hopefully you'll have just as much to say about this one.**

**I do not own this world or these characters - just my plot.**

* * *

I had needed to talk to Kate much more than I realized. She helped me re-think several things about my life. We talked about how I was starting to stagnate again, trapping myself in the house for no reason. So, she gave me some new challenges. For work, she challenged me to take over bringing my things to my office again. She said that if reporters were an issue I could always re-evaluate, but that most likely it had died down enough for me to handle it. With Edward, she said that we also needed to make sure not to take things too quickly – and that we really didn't know each other as a couple at all. She challenged me to make sure that our relationship was a two-way street, and not just him trying to take care of me. She also challenged me to start calling Renee and Charlie my parents. She said I already called Nessie my sister, and that this was the logical next step.

When I visited work to drop things off, there was nobody unusual outside. Most of the commotion came when I got back to my floor. Everyone was so happy to see me and made such a big fuss that Mary came out of her office. When she saw me she crossed the room to hug me, which turned into a kind of silly group hug. I really needed it. She asked me when I thought I would be coming back into the office, and I told her that I hoped to get back in after the case was settled – as long as the press didn't pick back up. I realized that more productive or not, I missed the joy of being able to go into the office and see my coworkers. I was eager to get back to it.

Some days after that, Alice and Angela drove to the Cullen's home for our road trip to Forks. Masen insisted we take his car, a monster-sized SUV, and I had to admit that it was comfortable. Angela took the front seat so that Edward could sit next to me, and we were torn between our own conversation and laughing at poor Ben sitting next to Jasper and Alice in the back.

By the time we got to the house Masen (and probably Ben) was sick of all the couples. We all spilled out of the car, and even Angela was rolling her eyes as we walked to the door.

It wasn't until the door opened and Lizzie stood smiling at me, that I realized that all of the spheres of my life hadn't connected. Alice and Angela had met Lizzie and Jake once, and had met Nessie a few times, but they didn't know Charlie or Renee. Edward knew all of the Swans, but had never met Jake or Lizzie. And Masen, Jasper, and Ben, I realized, had yet to meet anyone unless Masen met the Swans one day at work.

"Hey Lizzie." I said.

"Happy Birthday!" She said, grabbing me in an enthusiastic hug. This time, her hair was a soft, almost platinum blonde.

"Hey everyone, come in." She said once she let me go. She pushed the door open behind her, and everyone walked in.

"Your parents are in the kitchen." Lizzie said, already starting to walk away. It was so simple and straightforward when she said it, like it was just a given or a matter of fact. It helped me relax, even though I saw Angela and Alice exchange a look.

"Wait, Lizzie, this is Masen, and this is Jasper, Alice's boyfriend, and Ben, Angela's boyfriend, and this is Edward, my boyfriend." Lizzie turned and smiled, extending a hand to Edward.

"Nice to meet you, boyfriends. Nice to meet you, Masen." She shook their hands one by one, smiling.

Everyone else was in the kitchen. Nessie sat on Jake's lap at the table, Renee was unwrapping something on the counter, and Charlie was hovering. When we walked in, everyone looked towards us.

"Hi." Renee was the first to speak, smiling. I took a deep breath, and then moved forward.

"Renee, Charlie, these are my friends Masen, Alice, Jasper, Ben, and Angela. Guys, these are my parents, Renee and Charlie." The room paused for a second, and then Renee let out a small squeak. She looked like she was about to cry, covering her mouth with one hand and waving at us with the other.

"Don't mind me. Alice, Angela, Jasper, Ben, Masen, it is so nice to meet all of you."

"Nice to meet Bella's friends." Charlie smiled, and went around and shook everyone's hands. And after Renee composed herself she gave everyone a hug.

It was strange to celebrate my birthday there. Calling them my parents out loud had been anti-climactic for me, internally. I realized that mentally, I really had started to think of Charlie and Renee as my parents even though I was fighting it. Renee would check in with me every so often to make sure I was alright, just a phone call two or three times a week, and she always put Charlie on to say something even though he was nowhere near as talkative. Kate was right – it was about time that I bit the bullet and started using the word.

At the same time, it was like a dam broke for Renee. Charlie didn't change, although I could tell that I'd made him happy by the smile in his eyes. But Renee was practically beside herself with happiness. The whole day she made a fuss over everyone. She'd baked a cake for me by hand, frosted it and everything, which Nessie told me was a big deal because she wasn't very domestic at all. They'd also bought a few bottles of champagne, which Nessie sipped smugly since even though she had been 21 for a few months, apparently Charlie still wasn't comfortable seeing her drink. If Renee wasn't asking someone if they were comfortable, she was getting them more of something, or sitting next to me and Edward.

The only person who left my side less than Renee was Edward, who stuck to me the whole day to make sure that I was okay. I remembered what Kate had said, but in reality it was difficult to know how to make the change. Things between me and Edward were going really well, in my opinion. I felt we'd transitioned very easily to dating. While he was still in the early stages of trying to find a new case, he had a lot of free time. He would come over in the evenings, and we'd just talk. I didn't want to break what we had by getting on his case about being overprotective when nothing was wrong.

After a while, all of our conversations at the party kind of died down to individual conversations between couples. Charlie was saying something to Renee that had her smiling from ear to ear, and from the not-so-convert glances our way I knew they were talking about Edward and me. Alice and Jasper were talking to Jake and Nessie about something or other; Alice and Nessie had formed a pretty strong bond over their shared love of all of the designer things Alice had failed to make me love. Angela and Ben sat with them, but it was clear that the two of them were in their own little world. To my surprise, Masen and Lizzie had linked up at some point and were sitting to the side having their own conversation. It was kind of nice; I really liked Masen and I really liked Elizabeth, and although I never would have put them together I couldn't help hoping they worked out.

We didn't end up leaving the house until late. Around 6 we ordered a bunch of pizzas, popped yet another bottle, and settled down to watch some reality singing competition and laugh at the auditions. Then, Nessie insisted that everyone sing the birthday song to me again so that she could record it. Except, while they were singing Charlie and Renee surprised me with a beautiful pair of earrings and a necklace. Apparently, this was the cue to present me with a bunch of gifts.

Nessie and Jake got me a giant assortment of flavored chocolates, which are definitely a guilty pleasure. Ben and Jasper teamed up to get me a giant stuffed bear – I had no idea how I had missed them sneaking it into the car – wearing a T-Shirt that said "Bella's Bear." Angela and Alice told me that my present from them was coming soon, and to get excited – not budging even when I whined about how much I hated surprises. Lizzie's gift made everyone in the room go quiet. She'd painted a portrait of Nessie and I that was so hyper-realistic it almost looked like a photograph. She was so into alternative forms of art that I hadn't even realized that Lizzie was such a talented portrait artist. At the looks on everyone's faces she winked, and told Renee to expect something even better for Christmas.

Edward waited to give me my gift until we all arrived back at the Cullen home, hours later. As everyone piled back into their cars, he told Masen that he was going to stay the night, and then helped me carry all of my gifts in. Inside, even though it was late, Esme and Carlisle presented me with a lovely bouquet of flowers and wished me a happy birthday before going to bed – though not before fawning over my new portrait. From the way that they didn't react at all to his staying, I figured that he must have clued them in.

Then, when it was just Edward and I, he led me up to his room. Because I lived downstairs, it was rare that I went upstairs at all. I had never really been in Edward's room. It definitely looked lived-in, despite the fact that it wasn't exactly a childhood room. It was modern, with sleek, dark furniture and cream colored walls. He had some work things scattered on his desk – which I noticed was glass topped and had to pause to investigate – and though by no means a full closet he had an assortment of professional and leisure clothes put away. He had never struck me as a messy person, but seeing the room confirmed that between the two of us Edward was far neater.

He pulled me over to the bed and told me to close my eyes, ignoring my protests. When I opened them, he handed me a jar and an envelope. I took the jar first. It was a simple glass jar, but it was emitting a pretty, soft blue light. When I opened it, I saw that the culprit was a small blue lightbulb attached to the lid. Edward sat next to me, putting the envelope on his lap and taking the jar back.

"You can turn it on and off like this." He demonstrated, before handing it back to me. "Read the lid." He said. I closed the jar again, and looked at the lid.

"Reasons why Isabella can survive anything." I read it out loud, then looked up at him. He was staring at me so intensely I almost forgot how to breathe.

"There's a hundred and seventeen. That's how many I got to before I figured I should stop. I just thought that with everything life has thrown at you, maybe it'd be nice to have a reminder. You don't have to read them all now."

"I want to see some of them." I pulled out four of them, passing the jar back to him to unroll the papers. He'd written them by hand, and the thought of him hand writing 117 nice things about me almost made me a bit teary eyed.

"Isabella is ridiculously strong mentally and emotionally." Edward reached over and took the other 3 papers, winking at me.

"Isabella is the most beautiful woman inside and out. Isabella is courageous. Isabella is not afraid to stand up for herself." He smiled and put them back in the jar, and then leaned over and kissed me. I had to set the jar down on the bed to make sure that I didn't drop it, as I threaded my fingers through his hair and pulled him closer to me. Kissing Edward is like nobody I've ever kissed before. Everything about him is just a bit intense including his kisses. Every kiss is like it's the last time he's going to see you, gentle but insistent and all-consuming. I slid my hands down and rested my arms around his neck as he pulled me closer. Then, he abruptly pulled away, leaving me panting.

"Wait, okay, open this." He said, smiling at me and handing me the envelope. I was still reeling from the kiss, and he laughed a bit as I fumbled to open it. Inside the envelope I pulled out two tickets to see the Seattle Symphony perform Fantasia at Benaroya hall. I love Benaroya, and before everything I had joked to Alice and Angela that one day I was going to see the symphony just to dress up and go to a beautiful building. But I would never have forked over the money to do it on my own.

I looked up at Edward, and I had absolutely no idea what to say. He was smiling at me, looking like the cat that got the canary. I was speechless.

"Edward…" He shrugged.

"You know, I'm your boyfriend, and we've never been on a real date. I want to fix that."

"This is a lot for a first date."

"It's an investment in my future. You, Isabella, are absolutely worth it." Then we were kissing again. We moved, carefully, from sitting on the edge of the bed to laying, my gifts laid out next to us. Then, Edward rolled us over so that I was laying on my back and he hovered over me. I pulled back,

"Edward, be careful, I don't want to smash my jar."

"I'll make you another one." It was the most insistent he had ever been. We stayed like that for a long time, eventually slowing down to small, closed-mouth kisses. He rolled off of me onto his back, and we lay there for a beat. I waited for him to move back over, or roll me over, or anything. Instead, he sat up.

"Your jar survived." He said, in a light, teasing tone that was somewhat ruined by how low and rough his voice had gotten.

"Great." I said, mostly because there wasn't anything else to say. I readjusted my shirt self-consciously, reaching through to readjust my bra as well.

"It's getting late, we should probably get to sleep. Let me walk you down." Getting late was an understatement, it was almost three in the morning. I was really confused. Edward had to be as turned on as I was – I'd felt the evidence pressing against me even as he tried to keep his weight off me. But he acted like we'd stayed up playing cards. I picked up the jar and handed him the envelope.

"You hold on to these, I don't want to lose them." I said. He smiled, pulling me in for a quick kiss before taking the envelope and putting it in a desk drawer. He grasped my hand in his, and led me all the way downstairs. When I opened my door he stopped, leaning on the door frame. He tugged me closer to him and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me in for one last long kiss. His hands slid down to my ass and he pulled me, almost roughly, into him. Just as quickly he broke off the kiss, resting his forehead against mine.

"Happy Birthday Bella." He smiled at me. I was a bit frustrated, and more than a bit turned on, but there was no way I could avoid returning that smile.

"Goodnight." He said, kissing me on my forehead before sliding his hands back up to my low back.

"Goodnight, Edward." I said. Then just like that he was gone. I'm sure I don't even have to tell you what my dreams were like that night.

I didn't have too much time to dwell on whatever was going through Edward's mind, however. Two days later, I was driving to the courtroom for the first day of Jane's trial. Everyone had told me, repeatedly, that I didn't need to go if I didn't want to – especially because I wasn't testifying. But I had to be there. As bad as it would be to watch Jane getting harassed by lawyers, I was sure nothing could be worse than waiting to hear the summary on the daily news.

I had to fight my way through reporters when I arrived, all of them frantic to know what I wanted to happen. I sat with Charlie and Renee, all of us in the front row behind the prosecution, but none of us were happy. It was a really difficult day for all of us, and Jane wasn't even on the stand yet. I hadn't prepared myself mentally for hearing all of the details of my life being explained to perfect strangers.

Jane was pleading Not Guilty, and part of me felt sick not saying anything, but I didn't want to see her go to prison either. Edward's gift ended up being useful after all. I'd stuck it in my bag on a whim, and when the court went on recess in the middle of the day, I went to the bathroom and read five of them to myself, imagining Edward telling me that I was tenacious, independent, genuine, inspiring, and unstoppable.

Then, I sat in the room as Didyme presented the signs of mental instability and unhealthy emotional attachment. Sam had told me that the prosecution would most likely attempt to frame my familial relationship with Jane and Tanya as unhealthy for both me and them – especially if I chose not to testify. Hearing what he'd said had made me doubt my choice for the first time in a long time. I hadn't considered that my not saying anything was worse than me speaking up.

The more Didyme spoke, the more uncomfortable I got. She was good with her words, confident, and charmingly convincing. By the time the first day had wrapped, I felt incredibly unsettled. The next court date wasn't for a week, which was a relief because I was barely holding on to my emotions.

It was worse walking out through the press. People were shouting questions at me left and right.

"Isabella, do you feel that the prosecution insinuated that you are mentally unstable?"

"Isabella, do you agree that Tanya and Jane are obsessed with you?"

"Isabella, was your childhood as happy as the defense made it seem?"

"Isabella, does your refusal to testify mean you condone kidnapping?"

I just pushed through, with help from Charlie. My parents walked me to my car, I hugged them goodbye, and then I drove straight to the library. It was something I'd arranged with Edward. He met me in the romance section, snuck me out, and brought me back to his apartment – just in case someone was following me. It didn't seem like it but he thought we couldn't be too careful, and after walking through a crowd of screaming reporters I agreed with him.

"We should probably wait a couple of hours before I take you back." He said, once we were safely in his kitchen without incident. I really liked Edward and Masen's two-bedroom. It was clear that Esme had given them a helping hand, because everything was masculine but still very aesthetically appealing. They had a lot of muted colors, with touches of vivid green that Edward denied was an homage to his eyes.

"Are you excited for the show tomorrow night?" I asked, because I was curious and because I really, really did not want to talk about the trial.

"Absolutely." Edward snaked his arms around my waist slowly, sensually, before leaning down to kiss me.

"I'm excited to see the snippets of the film with live music. And I'm already imagining how beautiful your excitement is going to be when you hear the music live for the first time." He leaned back in, kissing me, hands already sliding down to cup my ass. I moved up against him, sliding my hands under his shirt to feel his abs.

Twenty minutes later he was messing with the clasp of my bra while simultaneously steering me towards his room. Once he got it unclasped and got the door closed, he had me shitless in what felt like seconds. Then he was everywhere, hands and mouth, with me barely hanging on for the ride.

I got my hands under his shirt, and he pulled it off and leaned down for another searing kiss, pressing his chest into mine. The skin-to-skin contact was amazing, and as he moved away from my mouth to kiss a trail down my neck I was barely keeping up. He rolled us over, so that I was straddling his lap. I began to kiss a trail down his chest, but when I moved my hands to his belt he stopped me, covering my hands with his.

"Bella, stop." I froze completely, looking up at him. He didn't look like I had crossed a line, and from what I could feel pressing against my inner thigh it seemed like he was into it. I was confused as hell, but he slid his hands up my back and attempted to lower his face back to my neck like nothing had happened. I moved away.

"Are, is something wrong?" I asked. If he didn't have a condom, I definitely had a few in my purse.

"No." He tried again, and again I moved back.

"Edward, seriously, what's wrong?" He huffed, and his warm breath spilled across my neck. I fought the urge to just lean into him and move on.

"Nothing, I just don't want to take advantage of you."

"Wait, what?" I leaned away from him, and then scooted all the way off the bed.

"Bella, I don't want you to be mad at me." He said. I turned to look at him, raised eyebrow.

"I'm not mad I – you just said that you don't want to have sex with me."

"That is not what I said." Hearing his frustration, mixed in with that low, rough voice, was not helping me. I was standing in his room topless, and I felt incredibly vulnerable and defensive. I did a sweep of the room with my eyes, looking for where he'd dropped my bra.

"Oh, okay. You don't want to take advantage of me. Which is a fancy way of saying you don't want to sleep with me."

"It means I want the first time that we have sex to be one hundred percent because you want to sleep with me, not because you just had a rough day." My face dropped instantly, and I gave up on my bra, grabbing my tee shirt and pulling it on.

"Fuck." Edward said under his breath. I turned to him.

"That's what you really think? That I'm, what, trying to use your dick as a way to make myself feel better?" His hand dropped to his thigh, and he balled it up into a tight fist.

"No. I just, Bella I feel like we'll both feel better if we wait until the trial is over. Until that chapter of our lives has closed."

"The chapter of our lives where I meet you and fall for you? Oh, okay." I said, arms crossed. Edward stood then, his abs tensing distractingly.

"Can you please come here?" He said, holding his arms out. When I didn't budge he walked towards me, standing in front of me and resting his hands on my hips, his thumbs grazing the skin under my shirt. I wanted to be angry and pull away, but I was too horny and it was too distracting.

"Meeting you is probably the best thing that has ever happened to me, bar none. I really mean that; I don't think you can understand how much I care about you. I really want to do this right with you Bella. I can't afford to mess this up, because I can't afford to lose you when I just got you. So maybe it's me who's not ready. But I just want to wait until there's nothing else going on in our relationship except for the two of us."

"Okay." I didn't know how else I could respond to that.

"You're really not going to hold a grudge?"

"If that's how you feel, I guess I'm going to live with it." I caved, I totally caved. But I figured if it was important to him it was going to have to be important to me too.


	28. Chapter 27

**A/N: So, the dust has settled on what was probably one of the craziest months of my life, and I have come out the other side alive! I am so sorry for taking a month-long hiatus with no warning. This semester has been incredibly overwhelming for me, but I can practically SEE graduation from here. And, I am juggling some job offers which makes me so excited (and anxious) I could scream. Still, as I move out of the hectic and into the calm, I am trying to get back onto a regular posting schedule. Here's hoping! **

**The only thing I own here is my plot.**

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On Friday, I tried to focus on my work, but all I could think about was my upcoming date with Edward. Of course I was excited to see the live music, especially in the hall. And I was even a bit excited to get dressed up and go out. But mostly, I was excited to do something with Edward that had nothing to do with everything else going on in my life.

Spending a day reflecting on what he'd said, I kind of understood his point of view. My relationship with Edward was largely defined up until that point by the fact that he was taking care of me throughout the case. It would be nice to have a part of our relationship to look forward when everything settled. Besides, I had more important things to worry about.

Around 1 PM, I had given up on accomplishing everything and I'd decided to treat myself to a nice, long bath. Edward's bedroom upstairs had a huge tub, and I was sure he wouldn't mind if I used it. I didn't have any bubble bath, but I still filled it up with piping hot water, and settled in. I was just starting to get comfortable when my phone buzzed.

I picked it up, and saw that I had a text message from Mike.

To be clear, throughout this whole process Michael had not contacted me once. I hadn't necessarily expected him to, not after I broke up with him, but a small part of me was upset that he hadn't even reached out when I was hounded by the press. So getting a text from him out of the blue was surprising. The text just said "Can we talk?" and then "Check your email."

In my email, Mike had written me a long letter that, I guess, was supposed to be an apology. He started off by saying that obviously he would not have acted the way that he did if he understood the intensity of the situation. He then stated that I had to admit that I handled the situation poorly, though he did not blame me considering what I was going through. He said that he was hurt that I did not reach out to him when things got serious, considering what we had. He said a lot of things about our relationship, and that he still "cared for" me, and regardless of us entering a romantic relationship or not, he wanted to meet to see how I was doing.

Reading his so-called apology made me realize, once and for all, that Mike and I really just weren't good for each other. It was incredibly self-centered, and while part of it was really sweet, he never fully took the blame for anything that happened between us. Everything always made its way back to being my fault.

Still, I could appreciate him wanting to check up on me, so I texted him back and asked if he could meet me at the Starbucks by the police station at 3:00. I figured that I could hear him out, tell him that things really were over, and then sneak Edward a coffee under the guise of visiting Sam.

I got there five minutes after 3:00, and he was already frowning and fidgety. But when he saw me, Mike walked up immediately and pulled me into a hug. It was strange. It certainly felt more than friendly, but he didn't push any boundaries.

"I got your usual." He said, taking my hand and leading me back to the table.

"Thank you." I said, as I took a seat.

"Alright, so you've read my email?" He asked. Two tables over, some girl with curly, light brown hair was checking him out. I had to hold in a laugh.

"Yes, I read it. And I uh, I appreciated hearing your thoughts." I said, mostly to be polite.

"Good. I'm glad. I want to know what you thought. What do you think?"

"About…" I trialed off. I had said everything I needed to say when I broke up with him. Granted, it wasn't the most eloquent moment of my life, but I hadn't changed my mind.

"About us." He said. I couldn't help squirming just a bit.

"I mean, there is no us anymore. It's good to hear from you Michael, and it's really nice of you to check in with how I'm doing, but that doesn't mean we're getting into anything."

"But we could. I think both of us learned a lot from what went wrong. You were emotionally compromised and I shouldn't have made light of that."

"Michael that's not, you know that's not the only thing, right? I just don't think it would be a good idea. I don't think we're really very compatible."

"Okay." He sat back, nodding. I was surprised. I'd expected an argument.

"Well, how have you been?" He asked, smiling.

"I don't know. It's, I've been all over the place. It's been really hard. But everyone has been really helping me through."

"Good. I'm glad."

"How have you been, Michael?"

"I've been well. Hey, what if we go out to dinner tonight? Not as anything more than friends, but just to catch up."

"Oh, I can't tonight Michael."

"Do you and the girls have plans?" He laughed. I shook my head.

"No, I'm going to the symphony!" I couldn't help it, I was excited and it just came out.

"With who?" Mike sat forward, eyes narrowed. "On a date?"

"Yes." I had nothing to hide.

"With who?"

"Mike, that's not really any of your business."

"I can ask, as a friend."

"Michael." I tried to keep my smile up. He forced a laugh.

"Come on, just tell me."

"His name is Edward." I said. "Look, I think I should be heading out." I started to stand, and he grabbed my hand.

"No, stay. I didn't mean to make you upset."

"No, it's also getting kind of late."

"How long have you been dating this guy? And don't say it's not that long, those tickets are expensive."

"Michael, please just let it go."

"Bella, I really am just curious. Is he your boyfriend, or just a guy you're dating?"

"Does it matter?"

"It matters to me. Just tell me, Bella. It's me. It's not like I'm going to get mad at you. I can be adult about this."

"Okay, yes, he's my boyfriend." Mike let go of me.

"Alright Bella, thanks. That's all I wanted, your honesty. I do consider us friends, Bella, and I hope you do too." I couldn't bring myself to say yes, so I just smiled, before standing and walking back out to my car. With how strange he was acting I didn't want to run the risk of Mike trying to follow me to the station or to the Cullens, so I went to a salon near Jasper's place to get my nails done. It wasn't quite as relaxing as my bath would have been, but I came out with beautiful nails and eyebrows.

A few hours later, Edward was escorting me out of his car to the symphony.

Seeing Edward in a suit made me want to take back every single thing I had said or thought about it making sense for us not to have sex. He looked godly. The suit made him look taller, and emphasized his broad shoulders. He hadn't shaved, and something about his evening shadow made him look even manlier. In the car, I had to literally fight not to lean over and distract him while he was driving.

We walked in, past other beautifully dressed couples on the sidewalk, and I started looking for an usher. But he surprised me when he pulled me into one of the side corners of the lobby.

"Isabella, do you know how beautiful you are?" He asked, his voice low. He leaned down, kissing me once on the lips before leaning to whisper in my ear.

"This was a really bad idea. I don't know how I'm supposed to sit next to you all night looking like that and not sleep with you later. I'm sorry, I know this is unfair, but it is ridiculous how badly I want you." Then he was kissing me for real. He slid his hands down my back and pulled me closer to him, leaving me gasping as he moved to kissing my neck. I shifted just a bit and I felt him twitch in his pants, growing harder against my stomach.

"Edward." I breathed out, quieter than a moan. He stopped, against my wishes, resting his chin on my head.

"Let's go sit down." He said.

"Edward." It was a complaint. He smiled at me, then shook his head.

"I still stand by what I said, Bella. But you are so, so hard to resist." He emphasized the hard, and I knew that it wasn't an accident.

"Let's go find our seats." That distracted me a bit. I was actually excited to see the symphony.

We had amazing seats, right at the front of the balcony. When we sat down, Edward grabbed my hand in his and rested it on his thigh.

"You're going to be blown away." He smiled at me. And I was. It's difficult to describe how amazing the symphony was, especially if you've never been to one. Everything was so charged with life, the music felt like it was its own living thing. Some of the songs were accompanied by scenes projected on a large screen, but I just got caught up in the music.

Well, the music and Edward. Watching him listen to the music was an experience in itself. He was clearly, thoroughly enjoying himself. When the music changed tempo, or volume, or changed at all in a way that he liked, Edward's eyes would light up. His joy was almost overwhelming as he listened to the music. And when he really liked something he would turn to me, beaming, to see if I was enjoying it too – and I couldn't help but smile back. Even though we weren't saying much, it felt like I was learning about a whole new side of Edward. It felt like he was vulnerable. It was exhilarating.

When we left, I almost felt drunk I was so happy. I was holding on to Edward's arm as we filed out with the crowd.

"Where to now?" He asked me, leaning down, as we passed through the lobby.

"Let's go to your apartment and I can cook us something?"

"We barely have groceries." Edward admitted, grinning.

"Try me." There was a commotion happening outside the building, but I was too wrapped up in Edward to care, as we stepped outside. Well, I was, until I heard a scream.

"It's her!" I looked up into a nightmare. Four adult men with cameras were running towards Edward and I. He looked up just a second after me, and then immediately pushed me behind his back.

"Bella, reach into my jacket pocket and call speed dial 3." Edward whispered over his shoulder at me. I reached somewhat awkwardly around him and grabbed his phone.

"What's your password?" I asked.

"2352." He said. I typed it in, and then dialed 3.

"Edward?" A voice I didn't recognize asked, just as the men reached us. They immediately began taking pictures of us.

"Stand down, this is a police order." He said, but they completely ignored him.

"Isabella, is it true that this man is your boyfriend?" "Isabella, are you dating a police officer?"

"This is Isabella Swan. I'm with Edward at the Seattle Symphony Orchestra performance."

"Is there a problem m'am?" The voice asked.

"Bella, tell them to dispatch 3 cars to this location."

"Edward says for you to dispatch 3 cars to this location."

"Alright, confirmed. ETA 4 minutes on the first car." The voice hung up, and I slipped Edward's phone into my purse.

"Seattle PD, stand down!" Edward yelled again. A news van came tearing around the corner, and then people were getting out with video cameras. Edward put an arm around my shoulders, pulling me to his side and trying to bring us back into the building.

"Get that picture!" One of the men yelled, trailing us. They weren't exactly chasing us, but they pursued us.

"Bella, Edward, this is the Channel 5 News. Is it true that you two have pursued a relationship in the midst of this case? Sources confirm that you are her boyfriend, correct? Did this relationship begin due to Isabella's court case? Are you dating? Do her parents know?"

"Bella, hand me my phone." Edward was speaking quietly. Other symphony guests were standing watching all of this happen, making it difficult for us to get back into the building.

"Seattle PD, clear a path immediately." Edward yelled, and people began scrambling to get out of his way. When he brought me inside, everyone stopped outside, still yelling questions at us. Edward's phone rang.

"Hello? Yes, we are both inside. It appears we are both the targets. It's complicated. Ok. Ok I can do that. Alright, coming out in 2." As soon as he hung up Edward began moving us towards the theater. He brought us into the floor of the theater, and immediately began moving us down the aisle. When we got to the stage he put his hands on my waist.

"Jump." I jumped, and he lifted me up to get onto the stage, and then hauled himself up behind me.

"Alright, this way." Backstage, stunned security men tried to stop him, but Edward shook his head.

"Seattle PD. This is police business, stand down." They seemed so confused it was easy to get past them. He looked around, and seemed to see what he was looking for, because he led us further backstage. Then, he stopped at a door and opened it up. There was a ramp, and parked at the foot of the ramp was a car.

"This one's for you, Bella." He said. I grabbed on to his arm.

"I'm not going without you." I said, looking up at him. He frowned.

"You have nothing to be afraid of."

"Edward, I'm not afraid, we need to talk. Did you hear what they were saying? They know about, they know we're dating. They know you're my boyfriend."

"I know." He said, looking to the car. His eyebrows furrowed, and I could tell he was thinking. Then he slid an arm around my waist and led us to the car. He tapped on the window.

"Call off one of the other cars. We're both going to my apartment, alright?" Without waiting for an answer, he opened the back door and motioned for me to get in. I did, and he slid in after me and slammed the door shut.

"The other car is going to pull over anyone they suspect of following us." He explained, as another car pulled in. The officer in front started up our car, and we were off. We sat in a silence, both of us processing what had just happened. Edward was the first to break the silence.

"Bella, are you alright?" he asked. I paused to think about it, then turned to face him.

"That was really crazy. But can we, I want to talk about the symphony. Because that was one of the most beautiful things that I've seen in my life."

"I love the symphony." Edward gave a small smile. I smiled back.

"I know. And I like that I know that about you. And I am so, so glad I got to experience that with you. You were, it was incredible."

"I was incredible, huh?" He teased. I nudged his shoulder. "You are pretty incredible." I said, leaning to kiss him on the cheek before looking out the window. I hadn't been in a cop car since the day they took the three of us to be booked, and I barely remembered that. Aside from the barred, tinted windows it was kind of cool, almost comfortable.

"What was your favorite part?" Edward asked, and both of us started to let go of what had happened. By the time we got back to his apartment, with no incidents, I could almost pretend it was in my imagination.

"Probably not a good idea to go grocery shopping tonight, but I have ice cream. Masen used to work at Coldstone so if you ask he'll whip up something great."

"Hey, we're good, right?" I asked. I didn't want Edward to pull back from me, not because of the symphony. Edward sighed.

"I'm not letting you go, if that's what you mean. But we need to talk about what happened. When we get upstairs." The elevator ride up to his floor was spent in silence. When we opened his door, to my surprise, Masen was sitting in front of the TV. He looked over to us.

"Guess the shit hit the fan." I looked between Edward and Masen.

"When did you even have time to tell him?" I asked. Edward opened his mouth to say something but Masen beat him to it.

"He didn't. The television did. Apparently, an anonymous tip revealed that Isabella could be found this evening taking her mind off of the case on a romantic trip to the symphony with her boyfriend. Reporters were shocked to discover that her boyfriend is none other than former investigator Edward Cullen." He spoke in a flat, chipper voice, mocking whatever newscaster he'd apparently heard it from.

"It's already on the news?" I sighed. Edward slid his arm around my shoulder, and kissed the top of my head.

"I'm sorry." He whispered. I shook my head.

"Don't be. Tonight was actually the best night of my life. And it's not done yet. Come on." I grabbed his hand, nodded to Masen, and pulled Edward towards his bedroom.

"Bella." It was half a question, half a warning. I shook my head.

"I'm not going to have sex with you Detective Cullen. But you look entirely too good in that suit."

"Oh, really?" Edward was looking at me like he was trying to figure me out.

"Yeah, it needs to come off." I said, pausing in front of his door to slide my hands up under his suit jacket and slide it off his shoulders. He reached behind me and opened the door, then slid his jacket off and dropped it behind me, before picking me up bridal style.

"I could say the same for you." He said, dropping me onto his bed.

"I can go first." I said, getting up on my knees and turning so he could access my zipper. But when I didn't feel anything, I turned to face him. Edward stood, eyes hooded, looking at me like he wanted to devour me. But he wasn't.

"What's wrong?" I asked. He shook his head.

"You are incredible, do you know that? Not just, I mean you're obviously beautiful. But you're really, really okay with what just happened?" I gave a small smile.

"In the car I decided something. This whole thing is going to suck. And I talk about this with Kate all the time but, I don't know, this made it make sense like, if I keep waiting for things to just magically be perfect in my life I'm going to be unhappy for a long time. Edward, I had the most incredible night with you. That's it. All of the other crap that happened will still be happening tomorrow. And I –"

I didn't get a chance to say much more because in one motion Edward grabbed me in his arms and he was kissing me like his life depended on it. And no I didn't sleep with him, even though a huge part of me wanted to ignore all logic and dive right in. But waking up the next morning with Edward looking at me like I was a goddess, with clothes on, was pretty incredible.

Unfortunately, I was right about our problems not going away. The media wasn't on a manhunt for me or Edward, but there was a lot of speculation about our relationship. It seems like everyone in America had to have an opinion. Jane even collect called me from jail to tell me that she was happy for me, because her and some other inmates had seen the news. It was crazy.

In an attempt to give me some distance, Angela and Alice gave me my birthday present. They booked us a cabin upstate and one week later the three of us, along with Lizzie and Nessie, spent an entire weekend completely cut off. There were no phones allowed – although we all brought them in case of an emergency. No televisions, no computers, nothing but peace. We went hiking, Nessie taught us all how to fish courtesy of Charlie, and we lay out in the sun as much as we could under the treetops.

Mostly, we talked. We talked about Alice and Jasper, and how she was starting to wonder if she was really committing to living the rest of her life with Jasper and not married to him. We talked about how Angela worried that she was falling too hard too fast with Ben. We talked about Nessie not knowing what was going to happen with Jake when she graduated. We talked about Lizzie not wanting to admit that she had a crush on Masen even though it was obvious. We talked about me and Edward, and our date, and everything I was feeling about dating him.

But we also talked about the case. Alice apologized for pushing me and Edward so much, and admitted that it was her way of trying to break me out of the funk I was in. Angela admitted that it made her look at Jane and Tanya really differently, and that it made her feel guilty as my friend. Lizzie and Nessie shed more light on their side of the process. I found out that Nessie had so desperately hoped that I was the missing daughter, because of how much it weighed on our parents when she was growing up, that she had been the one who pushed for the DNA test. Then, I spoke to them about what had been weighing the heaviest on my mind, which I hadn't admitted aloud until that evening in the cabin. We talked it out, and I came to a decision.

On Sunday afternoon, when we turned on our phones for the first time for the long drive home, I called Sam. I told him to notify all of the lawyers that I had changed my mind. I was going to testify.


	29. Chapter 28

**A/N: I'm really, honestly, sorry. All I can say to you is that this school year has been nothing like what I might have imagined. I chose to write an Honors Thesis and 117 pages later I realize now what a huge commitment that was – it took up all of my creative energy so that even when I would sit down to write all I could think about was my thesis subject. But the good news is, I have 2 months free before I start work in August, and I plan to make sure that this story is as close to finished as possible by then. I'm sorry for going MIA, because I hate when people do that, too. But I'm committed to finishing this and hopefully you're all still in it with me to get to the end.**

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Sam was not happy with me when I arrived, but not for the reasons I suspected. When he ushered me into the station the next morning Edward was nowhere to be seen, but I didn't have time to dwell on that as Sam sat me down and started questioning me about what I wanted to say.

We spent over 3 hours with Sam asking me different questions about my childhood, my adulthood, strange, obscure things about my life. He was typing away as I spoke, and every so often he would ask me to slow down, or repeat things, so that he could type them. By the time we were done, I was sure Sam had to know almost as much about my life as I did. Then, he told me that he had emailed me everything that we had discussed, and I had the next 24 hours to turn it into one statement, no longer than ten pages single spaced. At the incredulous look on my face he apologized, but told me that since I had decided to testify after the beginning of the case, my statement had to be submitted as quickly as possible. He told me that Renee, who had agreed to testify after I agreed to testify, was going through the same process.

The next afternoon, exhausted, I brought him my statement. He read through it while I sat looking at him, both of us in complete silence. When he was done reading, he looked to me.

"This is really everything you want to say? You know you cannot change this, once I send it in."

"It is." I said, and that was that. He told me to hold on, that the lawyers would be in contact with me on both sides to speak to me and seek clarification on my statement. He told me that the judge would have to decide whether to admit my testimony, and that of the Swans, and then once that was settled if we were admitted we could be given a court date.

The next morning, I got a call at 5 AM. I assumed it was one of the lawyers, so I picked up immediately.

"This is Isabella" I mumbled.

"Hello? Isabella? This is Della from MajorHouse publishing? We are a romance publishing firm and we wondered if you were open to selling the rights to your story for a romance novel?"

"Excuse me?" I was still half awake.

"We don't need a decision now, but if you ever did want to see your story come to life in a novel, you know that you can trust us. Call us back and let us know."

"Alright I will, thank you," I said, before hanging up. I put my phone on silent, and went back to sleep.

I woke up at nine, to seven missed calls. All of them were from various companies asking to buy the rights to my story. One was a magazine, three more books, two movie studios, and a comic book company. I was confused, until I turned on the news.

"I mean, I've had a few classes with Vanessa and she and her sister look so similar. I just think it's so tragic, and romantic. I would love to meet Isabella and Edward." The girl looked perky, with curly hair and a huge smile. The newscaster nodded at her, before turning to face the camera.

"Miss Makenna Nutley is just one of several women across the country who are desperate to learn more about kidnap victim Isabella. In light of the new information coming out about her romantic relationship with investigator Edward Cullen, some are calling this the romance to end all romances. Back to you Dale." I turned the volume up, as I heard footsteps behind me. I turned to see Esme coming down the stairs, but she didn't say anything, just sat down.

"From tragic victim to romantic heroine? Many women seem to be convinced that this has turned into some sort of fairytale for Miss Isabella. Brielle, what do you think?"

"Oh, don't get me into any trouble Dale. But I do have to say, it's kind of romantic, isn't it? I mean, can we replay that clip."

I watched as Edward and I came outside. I hadn't even realized someone had been filming us. But even though it was upsetting, it was fascinating to see. Edward and I just looked so happy. He looked dashing, of course, in his suit. And I looked good on camera, not great but not ugly either, and I looked so much happier than I had realized. And then the first shout, and him literally pushing me behind his back, then the clip stopped.

"Ok, tell me that's not sweet. You can tell they care a lot about each other. I mean, I'm not sure if I look at my husband that way anymore, but young love is just so sweet. And the idea that she found that because of this case, it is such an amazing love story." I flipped the channel at that point, still aware of Esme sitting near me and not saying anything. It was a morning talk show, and they were in the middle of discussing the exact same thing.

"I mean, you can see that clearly something was going on. Look at how protective he is of her." They were just running a bunch of short pictures and clips of us – Edward escorting us into the station, to my car, and then us outside the symphony.

"I wish I could find a man like that. That has to be a silver lining for sure." I reached to turn off the TV, but the next thing one of the hosts said made me pause.

"Do you think there's any truth to the rumors of a movie or a book coming out?"

"Oh, don't be bad. You know I'm not supposed to blab. But I will say this. I know that she has been approached by several companies at this point, and many of them are claiming to already be in first stage negotiations. We'll have to see if –" I turned the TV off and looked to Esme.

"I'm not. In negotiations to sell my story, I mean." Esme shook her head.

"Even if you were, I wouldn't be upset with you Bella. I am aware that you and Edward are dating, and I promise you if either Carlisle or I disapproved you would not be living in this house." She smiled to soften the blow of her words, before looking back at the television.

"Actually, I'm surprised you're not considering it." Esme said, speaking softly. I knew she was trying to be gentle, but her words still caught me off guard.

"Really?"

"I mean, this case took a lot away from you, from the Swans, everyone. It might be, I don't know, cathartic to tell your story your way."

"Oh." She looked at me.

"I'm not saying you should or shouldn't, just giving my opinion. Don't mind me." Esme excused herself, as if she was nervous that she'd overstepped, but I couldn't help pondering her words. I was still thinking about them three days later when I arrived in Kate's office.

"You were early today." She said, with a small smile, once we'd both settled down. I knew she was teasing me because normally I arrived just barely on time.

"I had a lot I wanted to talk about." I shrugged, and she smiled.

"Alright, well, annoying questions first. How was your weekend?"

"Actually, I think I really needed this weekend. I uh, I decided to testify." Kate sat back, looking at me with wide eyes.

"Really?" It was the first time I had ever gotten such a strong reaction from Kate, who seemed genuinely shocked.

"Yes?" It came out as a question, and I think that's what snapped her back into it.

"I'm sorry, ignore me, I'm just surprised. I wasn't expecting that. Do you want to say why?"

"I want the chance to tell my story how I see it. I know that everyone is going to have an opinion and they're going to try to put words in my mouth. But I want to get the chance to put everything on the record."

"Bella, what will you do if they ask you about Jane and Tanya? About the kidnapping?" I paused. I hadn't thought they would have any reason to ask me, so I hadn't even considered it. But I knew what I had to do. This was about me telling the truth, the way I remembered it.

"If they ask me point blank if Jane was the one who physically kidnapped me, I won't lie." I said, and that was it. I had no idea what I would say, or how. But I knew that I didn't want to lie on the stand. I wasn't willing to do that. Kate was silent for a bit, writing some things down, before looking back up at me.

"What else did you want to talk about?" She asked. So I told her about my weekend with my friends more in depth, and then I told her about the book and movie companies that had called me.

Kate was surprisingly open to the idea. Part of me had expected her to tell me it was a bad idea, but she said if I wanted her opinion, she thought it might be cathartic – just like Esme had said. She reminded me to keep in mind that they would probably be most interested in the romance aspect of the story, and to have a clear idea of what I would want to get out of a project before signing my name on the dotted line. Then, we both discussed how it would be good for me to wait until the trial was over to decide, and she reminded me that I didn't have to commit to anything right away.

Later, Edward and I were hiding in the library again. Though the news presence still wasn't as much as it had been in the beginning, it had definitely picked up. The library was discreet, and had free wifi, so the two of us sat towards the back: him doing research into new leads and me working on a new account. Except, it was more like him looking for new leads and me watching him use the computer.

"Don't you have to be done with that paperwork by the end of the day so you can email it to Mary?" He spoke without looking away from the computer.

"You're very distracting." I said, though I did glance back at my own screen.

"I offered to work at another table." He sounded so serious, but when I looked up he was smiling.

"What did you do while I was with Kate?" I asked. He shrugged.

"This, but in my office. I found a case that Masen wants to work on, about a woman who went missing but was last seen with her ex-boyfriend. Friends say they may have been planning to flee the state together, and the man hasn't turned up to work for a week. Now we're investigating leads for me to work on."

"Anything interesting?" I asked, but Edward just shrugged again.

"What did you and Kate talk about?"

"A lot of things. Me testifying. My weekend the girls. Uh, all of the companies that have been calling me."

"Yeah, Dad and I were talking about that yesterday. He said that I should hold out on a movie until they get someone famous like Brad Pitt to play me."

"Brad Pitt is ancient. You can do better than that. And there's no guarantee I would do a movie, or a book, or anything else."

"But do you want to?" He looked away from the screen then, his eyes smiling as we made eye contact.

"I don't know, I don't have to decide right now."

"But?"

"But if I did do something, I think I'd want to do a movie." When I said that, his eyebrows rose nearly to his hairline.

"Really? Why a movie?" I had his full attention.

"This is going to sound dumb."

"I still want to hear it." I couldn't look at him, so I looked back to my screen as I started talking.

"Movies have happy endings. And I think that's what I want. There's no guarantee that this will have a happy ending in real life – I don't think that any ending would make me happy at this point. But movies always have happy endings." I looked back over at him, just in time for him to lean in and kiss me. It was a sweet kiss, and when he pulled back he pulled me into a hug.

"That's not dumb at all, Bella." He said, and just like that I felt a little bit better.

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**A/N: Yeah, another one. To everyone who messaged me or reviewed asking if I was continuing this, I also owe all of you an apology for not responding. I wanted to be 100% sure that I could re-commit before giving anyone false hope in an answer. But thank you for reaching out – I saved all of those in my email inbox as motivation to keep working on this story.**


	30. Chapter 29

**A/N: Sorry this took so long guys! For whatever reason, FFN isn't letting me upload any of my documents. I tried to fix the problem for a while, but I think I just have to accept that I'm going to have to cop + paste. Anyways, I really love this chapter since this was one of the big plot points that drove this story for me - and you'll see what I mean by the time we're done! As usual, thank you all for your kind reviews, they really do motivate me! And hopefully now that I've accepted the copy/paste fate, we'll be back on a regular schedule.**

**I am not SM and I do not own Twilight, but please, enjoy. **

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My life became the trial.

Every morning, I would wake up, and how I felt depended on if it was a court day or not a court day. If it was not a court day, I would meet up with Edward, or Alice, or Angela, to talk about everything that happened. I tried to avoid places where people might be looking for me, especially because rumors were flying about me being "confirmed" to do a project with several different companies. I was beginning not to mind, and it still wasn't as bad as when the whole process began, but it still caught me by surprise when someone would try to snap a pic of me and Edward at Starbucks.

He was more upset about it than I was, which was hilarious all things considered. Apparently, he'd had a lot of people requesting him specifically for cases that were completely out of his jurisdiction. One Tuesday we'd had an hour long conversation about a mother who he was sure had her daughter "kidnapped" in hopes that he'd fall for her – based on how many pictures and accolades she'd showed off rather than answering his case questions. Apparently, when he'd mentioned getting the state police involved the daughter had mysteriously reappeared the next day.

Court days, though, were a completely different story. I always sat with my parents, and interestingly enough it was Esme who helped me stop feeling bad about what the press was saying. She reminded me that if I needed my parents to get through what was going on, nobody had a right to make me feel bad for that.

The second trial date, Jane took the stand for the first time. It was hard to see her on the stand. She'd lost weight since the last time I'd visited her, but it was the sadness in her eyes that hurt. It was Didyme's partner that interrogated her on the prosecution side, and I was grateful. He didn't pull any punches either, but there was something about the way Didyme spoke that was just worse.

The third trial was the Swans, Sam, and Edward. Edward didn't sit with us that day, which was rough. I completely understood why, but it unsettled me and I think it unsettled my parents too. Nessie was questioned the least, because she hadn't been born when everything went down. Both the defense and the prosecution asked my parents – especially Renee – what felt like hundreds of questions about meeting Tanya, the before, and the after. They asked if she had scouted out our house's floor plan. They asked if she had gone to the bathroom when she was in the house. They asked if she'd asked inappropriate questions about me.

The Defense, Edward had explained to me later, was banking on the fact that it would be very difficult for Jane to have kidnapped me if Tanya hadn't given her detailed information about our home and my parents' schedule with me. The Prosecution, on the other hand, was banking on the fact that this was a premeditated crime by Tanya, who had done all of this work to ensure that Jane would be prepared to kidnap me. Both of them had asked if the Swans had noticed any behavior that might have been a stakeout of the house, either Jane, Tanya, or someone they hired, but the answer was no.

Sam presented all of the facts of the case, and then he was questioned about them. It turned out, there were a lot of things I hadn't realized. There were things that were documented in my possessions, for example, that I didn't even remember. At one point all of my pictures drawn of my family were me, Tanya, and Jane. On all of my old school records Jane and Tanya were both listed as my parents. There were photos from mini trips I'd gone on where I lived with Jane for a while – things I remembered but didn't really. The prosecution suggested that Jane and Tanya co-parented me – a motive for Jane to kidnap me.

Edward was asked to speak about his interactions with Jane, and even though I couldn't fault him for his honesty, it was difficult to hear him describe Jane as someone who seemed manipulative and dishonest. He also said that it was clear that she cared a lot about me, but Didyme brushed past that quickly and focused on the negatives.

All-in-all, I needed those in between days to try and recuperate and gain back a semblance of normality. I visited Kate a day or two after every court date, just to try and process it all. By the end of the second trial, I was already dreading my appearance in court. When that day came, I felt woefully unprepared.

By the time I got into the car with Esme, who refused to let me drive myself to the trial with how nervous I seemed, I was physically shaking.

The night before, I had a nightmare that Didyme asked me who kidnapped me, point blank. I told her that it was Jane, and immediately Jane was dragged to the front of the room, crying out that I'd betrayed her, and immediately put into a prison cell right before my eyes. The judge sentenced her to life and she and the cell disappeared forever. Then Tanya appeared and told me that I'd betrayed our family.

In the car ride over, I regretted telling Kate she didn't have to come. I said I could hold it together until at least the next day, when our appointment was scheduled, but I started to wonder if I was kidding myself.

When we pulled up, it was almost like I couldn't even see the press. Seth, who I barely remembered from our time in Boston, was the one to walk me in. I was numb; it felt like I was blacking out.

I hardly noticed sitting down next to my parents, though Renee hugged me close when I sat down. I was transfixed on everything going on at the front of the room.

My first real moment of clarity was while I was being sworn in. I was going to be questioned by the prosecution first, and I locked eyes with Didyme. To my surprise, I didn't see triumph, or happiness, or pride, or anything that I thought I would see in her eyes. She just looked sad, like she was sorry for me. It was the most human she'd ever looked. That, more than anything, is what calmed me down.

"Miss Isabella, your statement please." Edward had warned me that, because my identity was technically in question, I would be addressed formally by my first name. But it still felt strange to hear the judge speak. I nodded, and began.

"My name is Isabella. Until very recently, I believed that my name was Isabella Denali. I believed that I was the biological daughter of Tanya Denali and an unknown man, and niece to Jane Denali. Early on the morning after what I believed to be my twenty-third birthday, on March seventeenth of this year, my roommates Alice Brandon, Angela Weber, and I were brought in to the station based on a noise complaint and a charge of public intoxication. We were brought in to booking, where I was fingerprinted. My fingerprints were a match to those of a child that had gone missing twenty-two years previously, also named Isabella. In the following months I came to discover that Tanya Denali and Jane Denali were not my biological relatives, but instead I had been kidnapped from Charles and Renee Swan when I was an infant." I paused, taking a breath, before going into the other things Sam had cautioned me to include.

"When the initial police investigation began, I called Tanya, who I then believed was my mother, complaining about the situation. It has become clear that she took this opportunity to flee. I met Charles and Renee, as well as my younger sister Vanessa, in April. Upon meeting them I began to suspect that there was some truth to the situation, which was then confirmed with a DNA test. At this point, it became clear that an investigation would be conducted. Attempts to contact Tanya Denali failed. However, she mailed me access to old items from my childhood. An investigation of these was enough to call Jane Denali in for questioning, at which point discrepancies between her stated account, Tanya's stated account, and the events as described by other 3rd parties involved at the time led to her arrest. Thank you."

"Prosecution may take the stand."

"Miss Isabella" I felt like a preschool teacher looking down at Didyme as she walked up. Now, her game face was on.

"Why did you choose to omit your psychiatric appointments from your record?" I hadn't expected that question, and certainly not as a first question. I swallowed, and paused to think.

"I didn't see it as relevant to the case." I tried to make my voice firm, strong, like Sam had told me.

"Were you seeking psychiatric help before the case began?"

"No."

"Was this help brought on due to the case?"

"Yes."

"In what way did you see it as irrelevant?"

"Discovering that I was kidnapped took a great emotional and mental toll, however me dealing with those emotions will not have any effect on the outcome of this case, which is to determine Jane's guilt in my kidnapping and not if I was hurt. I would hope it is obvious that this was a traumatic discovery for me, regardless of where blame is placed." Sam had also prepared me to separate my emotions from the case, and make them not the main focus. Didyme moved on to other topics.

She asked me to recall particular incidents that teachers had described. At one point I had gotten hurt at school and Tanya had refused to let me go to the hospital, calling Jane to treat it instead. While I was living with Jane, she'd lost me once at a super market and had refused to let the store call the police – waiting it out until I was found. It was all things I didn't remember, but she used it to make it sound like Jane and Tanya were paranoid. She also questioned me about never getting a passport and never wanting to leave the country, and tried to make it seem like it was an idea planted by Tanya and Jane. Then, we got to my present-day interactions.

"How many times have you visited Jane in jail?"

"I am unsure. However, I believe it has been six times, total."

"The record confirms that it has been seven times. What do you discuss when you visit?"

"I check up on her, see how she is doing. We mostly discuss my thoughts and feelings."

"Why do you continue to visit her?"

"Though I harbor mixed feelings about this reality, Jane Denali is still someone who I feel an attachment towards, and knew for the majority of my life."

"Has she ever asked you to speak on her behalf, or defend her?"

"No."

"Has she ever asked you to use certain words in telling your side of the story?"

"No."

"Has she ever asked for your discretion in keeping certain information about your childhood private?"

"No."

"In your opinion, who is responsible for your kidnapping?"

"Objection!" It was the only time I had ever heard the defense lawyer yell.

"Objection your honor. This is speculative information and will not contribute to the case at hand."

"Objection sustained. Miss Didyme, please constrain your questions to factual inquiries." Nobody seemed to notice how quickly my pulse had picked up, or that I was shaking on the stand. Everyone was focused on Didyme's frown, as she was clearly upset at being denied her question.

"Permission to proceed?"

"Granted."

After that, Didyme stayed away from questions about my opinions, and asked me more questions about my dealings with Jane and Tanya. She asked a lot of questions about my initial move to Washington and my mother's hesitance, and if Jane was hesitant as well. By the time she was done with me, I was mentally exhausted. Still, I held my head up high. After she was done questioning me, the judge called a thirty minute recess.

Sam had advised me not to speak with anyone during the recess, because that could be used by either side to discredit me. Instead, I sat in the front row of the courtroom and tried to pull myself together. I hadn't brought Edward's gift that day because I didn't want anything to seem suspicious, but I was regretting that choice just a bit in light of how unsettled and drained I felt. Surprisingly, I wasn't very hungry at all. Alice and Angela came that day, along with Jasper, and though I didn't sit with them either, it was nice to turn back and see them smiling at me – Angela giving me a thumbs up whenever she caught my eye.

By comparison, the defense questioning was much easier for me to handle. I knew that they were trying to paint Tanya and Jane as ordinary people who'd made a rash, impulsive decision. I didn't agree with that as absolutely as I once had, but it made it easier to answer their questions about the happy moments in my childhood. Where Didyme had made Tanya and Jane seem obsessed with keeping me in Massachusetts, the defense made it seem like the normal reactions of a single mother. Many of the questions had little to do with me personally, and not once did they ask a question that called for my opinion.

The whole time I was on the bench, I tried not to look directly at Jane. For one, Sam had told me to address most of my questions to the jury. The jury, which featured three single mothers and seven women out of the twelve total, seemed sympathetic as they listened to me. One had even given a small smile when the objection was sustained. But, I also avoided looking at Jane because I knew it would be uncomfortable. I hadn't thought they would place her in the room while I was testifying, and I wondered what it felt like for her.

As soon as the day was over, Edward swept me up in his arms. He kissed me in the middle of the hallway with all of the flashes going off, and told me that he was proud of me for getting through it all with poise. Renee and Charlie were next, with Renee crying and kissing my forehead over and over, and even Charlie looking a bit emotional. Then Nessie, Angela, and Alice all pulled me into the middle of another long hug. It was exactly what I had needed from all of them, and it made me feel a lot more grounded. But, it also made me aware of one more thing I needed to do.

Two days later, I pulled up once again to visit Jane. I just wanted to check in with her one last time, before the final verdict was reached. I had no idea what would happen, but I needed to make my peace with it.

This time, when I walked in, Jane made no move to hug me. Instead, she just nodded to the seat across from her.

"I have to tell you something, Bella." She said, looking more through me than at me. Immediately I was on edge, trying to get her to make eye contact. When I finally succeeded, she sighed so hard I thought she would collapse. I realized, too late, that she was trying her best not to cry.

"Bella, I love you, so much." She said, then she looked up to the ceiling.

"This morning I called my defense attorney and told them that I wanted to change my plea to guilty. They're working it through with the prosecution right now, to see what kind of a deal they can come to. There will probably be an additional court date added so that I can revise my testimony."

I sat there in a shocked silence. I had too many questions to try and ask any of them, so instead I stared at her staring at the ceiling. I glanced to the guard in the corner of the room, who to his credit seemed completely nonplussed.

"I think that this is what needs to happen, for me to be able to settle my conscious."

"Okay." I said. She glanced at me sharply.

"No, Bella, I don't like that tone."

"I just, I want you to tell the truth. But it's difficult. I'm worried about you."

"Bella you don't have to worry about me, honestly." I opened my mouth to protest, and she shook her head at me.

"No. Really." She sighed, leaning back in her chair.

"Do you remember once you asked me why I had never joined the cult? You were around eleven, and you asked me why I had escaped but Tanya hadn't?" I nodded, slowly.

"You told me that you were different people, and that was that."

"That was a lie. The reason that I didn't join was because right around that time, I met a man named Alec." She exhaled heavily again, her body curling up, and I knew this wasn't going to be a good story. I wanted to tell her she didn't have to tell me, but part of me felt like I deserved to know. So I didn't say anything, just waited for her to collect herself.

"Alec was older than me, a senior when I was a sophomore. When I was a senior, right when people were starting to fall in with the recruiters, he came back. When everything fell to pieces, Alec was there for me. Bella, he was my life." She paused again.

"We didn't start a romantic relationship until I went out to Massachusetts. He'd already graduated and moved out there. I think when I made the decision to move is when we really decided that whatever was going on between us was worth pursuing. But I knew I loved him before that. I – he was – nobody understood me like Alec." She paused again, looking through me once more.

"Alec hated Tanya. He hated her because he thought she was weak for succumbing to them. He loved me and he hated my sister, so I saw her less. So she fell in really deep with them because I wasn't there for her. But I couldn't blame Alec either. We were free. And I didn't see how bad things had gotten for Tanya but maybe I didn't want to."

"Her being in a cult was not your fault." I said softly, but Jane shook her head.

"It wasn't, but I was the only family she had left and I was on the other side of the country barely speaking to her." She smiled sadly.

"Anyways, Alec proposed. He proposed after we'd been living together for two years, and I was so happy that of course I said yes. Alec wanted it all, he wanted beautiful blonde babies and white picket fences. His parents were out of the picture – his dad had left when he was younger and his mom was an addict. I always thought that's why he hated Tanya, because he projected his anger at his mother on her. To him, it was a reason that we were the same. We both had family we couldn't count on." She paused for longer after that, and I knew that the bad part was coming next. I saw it in the way she adjusted her sitting, the way her breathing picked up.

"We knew we could afford a baby or a wedding, and I didn't want to get married without my sister there. So we decided to just go for it with the baby, until one of us could convince the other about Tanya. And Alec, he was, impatient. When I didn't get pregnant in the first three months, he took me to the doctor. And that's where." Her voice hitched, and I wasn't sure if she was done or if there was more she wanted to say.

"That's where I found out that I was barren. That I could never, ever have a baby." I had never heard this. Never had Jane told me this.

"I wouldn't have voluntarily told Alec, but he was right there in the room. That first night, he didn't speak to me, didn't even touch me. I was devastated, and he built a wall between us. I cried myself to sleep and he just lay there. But it took him two days to actually tell me that he could never love me, and never marry me if I was broken." I opened my mouth to protest but she cut me off.

"It took me years, Bella, years to make peace with that. But I didn't have years. I had two days. That's what Alec gave me to figure out my situation and get out of his house. He took the ring back. And he told me that he felt betrayed by me, by my body. So I was devastated, losing my mind. It was too many blows back to back. And then Tanya called me. She called me and told me that she wanted to leave the cult." Jane paused again, and her eyes refocused on me.

"She told me that she wanted to leave the cult because of you. That she had seen you and she knew that she needed you to do it. She told me that when she took you, you would be our baby. And I'm ashamed of this Bella, really ashamed, but part of me thought that if I had you maybe you would be a miracle. Maybe you could fix everything. So I came up with a plan. I was devastated, and scared, and I had a plan."

"Tanya came back here, and moved in with me, and we got her a job as a waitress where her hours were opposite from my hours. She told them she'd just had a baby and needed the night hours, and that when you were a little older she'd bring you by. And I, obviously, went to Montana. I got the birth certificate and made up a random date. I seduced one of the doctors and got him drunk enough to sign it. And I drove myself down to Pullman, Washington and climbed through a window to steal a baby." I thought she'd be done, but she wasn't.

"It was, it is, the craziest thing I'd ever done. I had to sneak out of Montana with you, terrified that someone would stop me and ask why I – who clearly was not a mother – had a baby. But nobody did. Everyone left us alone. And you were Bella, you were everything Tanya said you were. You felt like my little miracle as I held you. And I'm so sorry. Because I should have known better. But I'm also not sorry, because without you I don't know if I'd have survived Alec. But you gave me, Tanya, both of us, something more to focus on. And we loved you, and we love you, so, so much."

The room was completely silent. I'm sure even the guard was stunned by everything Jane had just admitted. Then, finally, Jane spoke again.

"Bella, I'm sorry for what I did, but I also need you to know that I would kidnap you a thousand times over again, even if it meant going to prison for the rest of my life. You're my miracle. But this chapter of your life is closed, and that's why I have to turn myself in. Tanya and I had you on borrowed time, I understand that now, and now it's time for you to be with your real family. But I love you, Bella. That will never change."

"I love you too." I said, but it felt final. Something changed. Knowing the full story, I did see Jane differently. I saw the compassion, but underneath her pain, for the first time, I saw a hint of insanity. It scared me, just a bit, and I left the room feeling more unsettled than when I came. I also felt guiltier than ever before.


	31. Chapter 30

**A/N: I have no idea why, but this is one of the chapters that caused that huge hiatus, so I hope you all enjoy it.**

**I don't own this world or these characters, just my plot.**

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Three days later, the world once again erupted. Jane confessed her part in the crime of kidnapping in the most dramatic way possible: a press conference. The one that they show at the beginning of the film. Afterwards, it became one of the most shocking public confessions to be made. At the time, I didn't see it coming. I knew that she was going to confess, knew that the lawyers were already in the know about the situation. But when I walked out of the prison after hearing about Alec, I had no idea what she planned to do.

Sam had called me later that night, to warn me that the conference was happening, but ultimately he needn't have bothered. It was breaking news first thing the next morning on every single channel and every single paper that she would be making an announcement. I understood why – she'd previously refused to make any statements on the case.

Sam and Edward had both advised me that it wouldn't be wise for me to be there, and I agreed. Instead, I drove up to Forks and watched with the Swans. Even Nessie drove up from school to sit and watch it with us. Jane came out in that red dress, her hair curled and Nessie and I grabbed each other's hands on the couch. As she stepped up to the podium, we all waited with baited breath. She pulled out a piece of paper, and I noticed that her hands were shaking. My stomach dropped.

"You are all here waiting to hear what I have to say, on the matter of my being wrongly accused as a kidnapper." She paused, drawing in a deep breath.

"Instead, you are going to hear a confession. Twenty-three years ago I, Jane Denali, kidnapped the baby Isabella Swan from her home and used my position as a nurse to have her legally registered as the daughter of my sister, Tanya Denali." Immediately there was a flurry of action as news people scrambled. People in the audience were genuinely shocked, and people began to shout questions. But I wasn't paying too much attention to them.

Instead I watched as Charlie, normally an impenetrable force, began coughing violently in shock. I watched as Renee choked out a gasp that turned into open sobbing. I watched as Charlie got himself together and grabbed Renee, pulling her tenderly onto his lap and rubbing her back. And I felt as Nessie leaned into me, sliding her arms around my middle and squeezing hard, burying her face in my shoulder. I grabbed her back; by the time the room had calmed down enough for Jane to continue speaking I was the only one who was still really watching.

"I am telling you all now, because I finally got the courage to admit this to one of the only people that truly matters in this case, Isabella. Once I was able to confess to her, I was ready to tell the world. And –" Jane paused, looking out into the sea of cameras.

"And yet, I wasn't able to speak to the only other people that matter. Charles and Renee Swan. I am not going to apologize, because I cannot ask for your forgiveness. What we did, Tanya and I, occurred in a time of immense vulnerability for the both of us. In Isabella, Tanya saw the courage to finally leave the cult that was controlling her life. You all know this. What you don't know – what I can only attempt to explain – is what I got out of having Isabella." She took another deep breath, her hands gripping the podium so hard her knuckles were white.

"At the same time that I found out that I would never have a child, and that the love of my life could not accept this about me, my sister finally opened her eyes to the conditions she was living under. She said that she needed this baby, and I felt that I needed a baby too. That maybe this baby was a miracle, just like Tanya was so sure she was. Against any sort of judgment at all, I flew across the country to perform one of the most deplorable crimes a person can commit. For that, I am truly sorry." She wiped a tear away from her eye, and the cameras went crazy.

"What I am not sorry for, however. What I will never apologize for, is having Isabella in my life. From the second I saw her, picked her up, she became my everything. Isabella saved me and my sister before she was even a year old. She made Tanya respectable, hardworking, and diligent. She let me live out a dream. She was our miracle."

"To Charles and Renee Swan, I know you would have loved Isabella every bit as much as Tanya and I did. And I am so sorry that we, that I, robbed you of the opportunity to watch her grow into the incredible woman that she is. But I cannot apologize for taking her, and I cannot ask your forgiveness from something that I will never regret." Jane was actively wiping tears away from her big blue eyes. Renee was crying, Charlie's face was turning red, and Nessie's grip around me was almost painful even though she'd turned her face back to the screen. But I just sat there like a stone.

"I am going to prison, and if Tanya hadn't fled the country she would be too. But Bella, darling, raising you was absolutely the best thing I've ever done. I love you." Jane unclenched the podium, stepped back, and immediately began walking away. She moved so briskly that the guard standing next to her had to fight to keep up. Reporters were yelling questions at her and there were even angry people with signs trying to block her path. But Jane moved through it as if she didn't notice any of it. Even when someone threw a sign at her, just narrowly missing her head, she walked calmly on. Meanwhile, in the living room, everything was quiet.

"How're you doing over there?" Charlie broke the silence, looking over at me. I shrugged.

"I don't know." Nessie was still burrowed into me, still holding me close.

"Sweetheart, are you alright?" I shrugged again, not sure what to say.

"Bella?" Renee asked again, looking at me with concern.

"I just, I feel so...bad."

"I know, that must be hard to hear."

"I feel like a bad daughter. To both…to all of you. Because I want to be fully angry with Jane, but I'm not. And the fact that I'm not makes me feel like I'm letting you down. But the fact that I want to be angry makes me feel like I'm betraying them. I just feel really guilty, all of the time, because I feel like it's been so long that I should have this all together in my head by now."

"Oh…oh Bella, I'm, I am so sorry." Renee frowned at me from the couch.

"You don't owe me an apology, at all."

"No, if you're feeling like that, I think we do. I, none of us wanted to put you in that kind of position. Bella, we understand that this is hard for you."

"But it's hard for everyone! That's what I don't want, I don't want you to apologize like this is somehow only happening to me."

"Do you need space?" Nessie asked, letting go of me.

"What? No, I, that's not what I'm saying. Ness, Mom, I…see that's it exactly. You are my mom. But every time I say that I feel like I'm betraying her, and then every time I don't say it I feel like I'm betraying you."

"Bella, maybe you should have some space. If this is really so difficult for you, don't you think that not seeing any of us, not Jane, not us, just getting away from it all, might make you feel better?" Nessie asked. She was hugging her knees to her chest, looking at me like I was a wild animal who was going to bolt at any minute. I felt like one, restless and out of control.

"No. It won't." I said, shaking my head. "You're my family. I need you."

"But –"

"Vanessa." Charlie jumped in to cut Nessie off. "She says that's not what she wants, so let's let it go."

So we did.

Well, kind of. Two days later, I had to bring it up in my meeting with Kate. I tried to run through the whole thing as quickly as possible, but as usual there was no speeding past Kate. As soon as I finished speaking, she leaned back in her chair and stared me down across her desk.

"Do you agree with Vanessa? Bella, you have to think about yourself right now. The Swans love you, I know you know that, but if being around them is making your life difficult that's okay."

"That's the problem. I want to be around them. I really do. The problem is Tanya, and the space she's filling in my head. I feel like she's never going to go away, you know? She's always going to be there. I never even got to say any of this to her like I can to Jane. She's just gone."

After a long pause, Kate slowly opened one of her desk drawers and pulled out a notepad. She slid it across the table towards me, along with a pen, and then folded her hands together.

"What is it you want to say to her, Bella?"

"I don't know. Goodbye? Why? I just have so many questions. I get why Jane did what she did but I have no idea why Tanya did."

"Write that all down. As a letter, or a speech, or bullet points. Write down all of the things you want to say to her."

"That won't help. I'm never going to get an answer from her. I can't send it to her."

"Then don't focus on your questions. Tell her how you're feeling right now. All of the confusion, the guilt, tell Tanya those things. If you're sad, if you're angry, if you miss her, if you want her to stay away. You don't have to tell me. Or anybody else. I know it's not the same as talking in person Bella, but you never know. One day she might come back. And you might want her to know."

"Do you think she would? Come back?" I had to ask.

"I don't know. It wouldn't be advisable, and someone in a sound mental state probably wouldn't. But I have no idea where she is right now physically, mentally, or emotionally. Instead of worrying about it Bella, the letter will hopefully give you somewhere to channel your feelings."

"Okay." We talked about some of the things I could do with my letters, and then about the Swans, and then about work, and finally Kate brought up the press again.

"Have you thought any more about the press situation?"

"I haven't been thinking about it, with the trial, it's all tied together. I think Edward has it worse. They don't know where he lives or anything, and they're not crazy enough to bother him at work, but they ask him so many awful things about us. It's exactly what he was trying to avoid, people saying things about him and his job. Nobody believes it, most people think he's a hero and he's getting a lot of jobs, but some people are still saying it."

"It's not bothering you?"

"Honestly, until now I hadn't even thought about it. I mean, the biggest thing on my mind is how they found out. The only people who knew about it were Masen, Alice and Jasper, Angela and Ben, Jane, my family, and his family. Uh, Sam I guess, and I'm sure some of the cops suspected and people I worked with. But still, I don't know, the whole thing was weird all day. I never even got to tell Edward about running into…" Suddenly, I remembered.

"Oh my God."

"Bella?"

"I saw Michael that day. He called me, and I met up with him, and it was weird. And he was so pushy about details about me, and Edward, and Benaroya. Oh my God, Kate."

"Bella, you suspect that Michael is the one who alerted the press?"

"No. I know it was him. I'm going to kill him."

"Bella, even if the signs point to him, I want to caution you not to do anything rash."

"I won't. Can we, let's talk about something else. I can handle Mike."

"Alright."

My time was almost up anyways. But as soon as I got out I called Edward. He picked up on the fourth ring, sighing into the phone.

"Bella, are you alright? Now is not a great time."

"Edward it was Mike who told the press to find us at the symphony. I'm almost positive." He went completely silent. I waited, and just when I was about to ask him if he was still there he spoke.

"Please go to my apartment, I want to talk about this as soon as I come home."

"Okay."

An hour later he stalked in.

"I didn't know you were still in contact with Mike." Edward said, and even though he was trying to sound nonchalant I realized he was upset.

"We're not. He messaged me that day and I thought it would be harmless to talk to him. But he got really, I don't know, interested in my plans for the day. It was so inconsequential in the grand scheme of that day, I didn't even realize it was the same day until I was talking to Kate."

"Huh." He grunted.

"Are you upset?" I asked, then winced. "Wait, no obviously. I mean, about Mike."

"Bella, of course I am. I don't understand why he would want to do something like that to you. I know you didn't break up on the best of terms but it didn't seem like he would be that vengeful. That's pretty disgusting of him."

"Oh." I hadn't realized he was upset on my behalf, and it made me feel better and worse. I should have expected it by then, but I was surprised at his concern on my behalf. But it also made me feel really stupid for trusting Mike. He looked over at me and shook his head.

"I would love to punch that asshole. Who does something like that?"

"Yeah well, that makes two of us." I said, leaning back.

"He tried to call me a couple of times after his stupid apology, and if he calls again maybe I'll pick up to tell him where he can get off."

"You should let me." Edward was clearly joking, but his statement got me thinking.

"You deserve to be able to talk to him, actually. It's not just my life, this whole thing made everything harder for you too."

"Ha, no thank you. Bella, the best thing you can do to someone like Mike is ignore him. Besides, in my opinion he played his trump card too early. If he wanted to achieve anything by telling this information, all he did was piss me off. We're still together. If anything, maybe I should call him and thank him for the boost in my business." Edward shrugged.

"You're still upset, though." I said.

"Bella, I'm going to be upset that someone deliberately tried to hurt you. And from your tone of voice on the phone, I thought you sounded a lot more upset than you were. But otherwise, I don't care." I stood up, going to stand between his legs.

"Edward?"

"Yeah?" He slid his arms around my thighs, holding me in a weird hug, before pulling me down to straddle him.

"I am really lucky to have you in my life." He spoke before I could. Then, without waiting for my reply, he leaned in to kiss me.


	32. Chapter 31

**A/N: Ok I'm going to get really real with you guys for a second. I've been having pretty bad medical issues (nothing life-threatening just uncomfortable) and we finally found out what was causing it, except now the issue is that the drug I was using to treat it had a serious side effect. I promise, the actual reason I'm ill is 100% not a big deal, but it did kind of shake up my writing schedule. That being said, now that I'm hopefully going to be put on a better drug and have the whole issue cleared up, I'm making this my top priority for July. Right now this story is going to be 49 chapters plus the epilogue, so there are 19 chapters left! Hopefully you all stick around to read them!**

**Thank you to everyone who has followed and favorited, and an especially big thank you to all of you who review! As usual, I don't own this world or these characters, just my plot.**

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After discussing it with Kate, with Mary, and with my girls, I realized that I was ready to get back to the office. According to Mary I was still on track to be promoted early, and due to the work I'd done in the face of my situation she said it was even more likely. So, I moved to a 3 day a week commitment. That way, I had 2 days off a week for court appearances or just for personal time, but 3 days a week I came to work. It was a rough adjustment, getting used to working with other people and stopping at regular times for lunch or some break-room chats. But I had missed everyone more than I realized, and I was excited to get back to my old routine.

Alice and Angela had updates too. Alice and Jasper had reached some sort of impasse about the marriage conversation, and Alice was unusually quiet about it. She said that she was happy, and he was happy, and that's all that mattered. Angela and Ben were also getting more and more serious, even though she wouldn't admit it. She barely called him her boyfriend, but she'd gone to two work functions with him as her date and whenever we made couple plans he was always included.

The trial and work ate up most of my time, and I tried to divide the rest of it evenly between Edward, my friends, and the Swans. Edward was easy, he came over so often his parents joked that he might as well move back in. I'd gotten used to living with the Cullens, especially having Esme to talk to. We didn't have dramatic heart to hearts, but when I needed to talk to her she was always there. In his own way, Carlisle was too. I liked them, and even though it probably should have felt weird to be living with my boyfriend's parents, it never did.

Alice, Angela, and I made ourselves stick to a once a week friend date. Sometimes we brought the guys, once Nessie, Jake, Masen, and Lizzie tagged along, but most of the time it was just the three of us. We wouldn't talk about the trial, or about getting married, just about work drama and anything else that came up. Even though the press was less focused on Edward and me after Jane's confession, it was still a lot more attention than I was used to. When the 3 of us got together, it was just relaxing.

The strangest was the Swans. Of course, Nessie and I got along great. She was burning the candle at both ends with her last year of school, trying to be a great student and a great girlfriend and a great daughter and sister and so many other things, so we mostly spoke on the phone when she needed a break. But Renee, Charlie, and I fell into a strange relationship. In retrospect I think they were trying to give me a little bit of space because of how guilty I was feeling, but I didn't get it at the time and I was a bit clingy. We sat together in court for every single date, all of us watching and waiting to see what was going to happen.

With everything going on, in the days leading up to the sentencing date my head was all over the place. Nobody could get me out of the funk I was in. I was looking forward to the case being over, but I was nervous about what it would mean. The morning before, I woke up at 6 AM to Edward knocking on my door.

"Bella? I'm sorry, I know it's early, but I wanted to catch you before I had to go to work. Are you awake?"

"Huh?"

"Can you get up for a second? I promise I'll leave soon." I rolled out of bed, threw my hair into a ponytail, and opened the door.

"Good morning." Edward smiled, pulling me in for a hug.

"Good morning."

"Were you asleep? Don't you have to get to work too?"

"Not until nine. I normally sleep until seven."

"Sorry." I looked up from the hug to see Edward fighting a smile. I elbowed him in the stomach, but he only laughed at me.

"It's not funny. That's a whole hour of sleep."

"Okay, I'm sorry. Wanna come upstairs? I feel kind of weird standing outside the door like this."

"Ugh, fine. Let me brush my teeth."

"Okay, are you going to make breakfast?"

"Don't push it, Edward." I rolled my eyes as I went to quickly use the bathroom, and then I made my way upstairs.

"You look really cute when you wake up." Edward pulled me into a hug as soon as I was up the stairs.

"Nobody looks cute when they wake up. But thank you." I kissed his chin, then took a step back.

"Why are you here so early?"

"Are you feeling alright about tomorrow?" I shrugged.

"I don't know. No matter what happens, someone I care about is going to prison. And no matter what the verdict is, I'm going to feel guilty if I'm happy she's in prison for a long time, and I'm going to feel guilty if I'm happy she's in prison for a short time. There's no winning."

"I'm sorry. Are you excited for work?"

"That's not going to work."

"What? I'm just asking you a question, are you excited?" Edward stepped forward, dragging his hands up my sides.

"You're not going to distract me from it. And you don't have to. I'm fine."

"Hmm?" Edward hummed, before leaning down to kiss me. He pulled me up against him, but he was definitely taking his time. His lips were so soft, and there was nothing urgent about it. No pushing, no fighting, just a little bit of tongue. It was like he had all of the time in the world. Next thing I knew, his phone was going off.

"Mmm" He sighed into my mouth, before pulling away. I glanced at his phone, and had to hold in a laugh.

"Did you really set an alarm?"

"I could kiss you Bella, just kiss you, for hours, never mind the other things I want to do with you. I had to set an alarm, Masen is expecting me. We're working on a joint-case to get his feet wet."

"You didn't have to come over here, you know. I'll be fine. I have work to distract me."

"I wanted to. I wanted to see you. And now that I know you're okay, I should head out. Tell my mom I said hey?"

"Yeah, absolutely. Bye Edward." I leaned up to give him one last kiss, but as I started to move away he caught my hand.

"You're sure you're alright?" I smiled, rolling my eyes a little to tease him.

"I'm positive. Go, dig up some clues or something."

"Dinner tonight?" He asked. I nodded.

"Now get out of here." I gave him a little shove. He laughed, holding his hands up in surrender.

"Fine. Fine. I'll see you later." He made his way to the door, and I made my way back down to my room.

When I walked in, I had barely flopped back into my bed when my phone started ringing. Sure that it was Edward calling back to bug me some more, I didn't even check my phone, I just picked up.

"Hey, did you forget something?"

"Bella?" I froze. It had been months, but I placed that voice instantly.

"Bella, darling, can you hear me?"

"Mom?"

"Oh my God, Bella, are you alright?"

"Mom, is that, what are you, where are you? Mom, where are you?" Suddenly I was on the verge of tears, and I didn't even know how I got there. I couldn't sort through any of my feelings. Part of me felt happy, and part of me felt incredibly scared.

"Bella, I know I shouldn't be calling you. But I had to. I had to hear your voice. Bella, I am so sorry."

"Mom."

"No, please let me get this out. I am so, so, sorry you are going through this without me. I never, ever wanted this to happen to you and it's my fault and I am so sorry. So if you're mad at me, and if you hate me, I completely understand."

"I don't hate you, mom. I just, I don't get it. I don't get any of it, why didn't you tell me? Maybe I could've…"

"Bella, have you met your parents? I've seen some of the pictures, it seems like you're close, but I know that the papers can lie." It was weird, to hear her call them my parents so casually.

"I, yes, we are. Close I mean."

"Good! Good, that's, they deserve that. They deserve to have you back, Bella. Can you tell me about them darling? Are they good to you?"

"I, yes of course they are. Mom they're, Renee and Charlie are so, I don't even know how to describe it. I didn't know it could feel like that with anyone, and they should feel like strangers but they don't. Somehow, they don't. And I have a sister mom and she's, Vanessa is the best. We're so alike, it's weird. You can just look at her and you know we're sisters."

"Okay, that's good. What do they do? Is Charlie still a cop?"

"Yeah, he's chief of police Mom. And Renee teaches kindergarten and she loves it. And all of her kids love her so much. She's taking a sabbatical right now because of the trial and everything, and her kids from last year made her cards and made me cards. Two moms got her flowers. She's, Mom they're really great people."

"Of course they are Bella, they're your family. And anyone who made you has to be amazing. Now, tell me, is this boy, Edward, are you really dating him?"

"Yes. Oh Mom, you would love Edward so much. He's so giving, and sweet. He's a really strong person, and he's stubborn, but he listens to me. Not like Mike, he really listens to me. He's been my rock through this whole thing. I don't know if – even with Alice and Angela – I don't know if I could have gotten through this without him."

"Good. Then he's what you deserve. How are my girls? Any headway with Jasper?"

"Not yet, I think they've agreed to stop talking about it. Alice is getting restless though, I think she's looking for something new in her life, like when she got her haircut. And Angela has a new guy. His name is Ben and he's so into her, if they break up it's only going to be because of her because I swear Ben would marry Angela today." Tanya laughed, and I realized how much calmer I felt. It almost felt like I was having one of our usual catch-up chats. I almost forgot that she was somewhere out in hiding. That thought brought me back down to earth.

"Jane's verdict is announced tomorrow." She sucked in a deep breath, and I knew that I'd brought her back down to earth too.

"I know." She admitted quietly, and then she sighed.

"Bella, whatever happens tomorrow, can you please tell Jane how sorry I am? I could have taken her with me. I know she had a different view of this situation than I did, but even still I could have taken Jane with me. And I didn't, because I thought she'd be safe. I left my sister there and now she has to go to prison by herself. Please tell her that I'm sorry, Bella. Even if she doesn't want to hear it."

"I don't think she's mad at you."

"She should be. You both should be, Bella. And I feel selfish for even calling you, and for asking you to face Jane because I can't. I love you, darling. But you weren't mine to keep." She paused, and I let her catch up to her thoughts. When she started talking about Jane, her voice lost the cheery tone she'd had. She sounded really upset, and part of me was really scared for her.

"Bella I really want you to forget me and get to know the Swans. I know that's so crazy of me to ask, because if it wasn't for me you would know them. And the selfish part of me wants you to never love them, but that's not fair. You need, I won't be there. You think you're grown up but there are so many things you have left to experience and I'm not going to be there. Someone has to be. And they deserve that. Don't, I don't want or expect you to promise me that Bella. But I know you, and I don't want you to feel guilty about loving them. You should love them. They're your parents, and I'm…" She took a deep shuddering breath.

"I'm not. I have loved you, and raised you, as best as I knew how Bella. But I'm not your parent. And if this is how it had to happen, maybe this is how you were meant to get them back."

"Mom…"

"No, Bella. I have to let go of you. And you have to let go of me, too. And that's why I've called, is to say I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you so much Bella, but this is goodbye. Not for forever, I hope not, but for a long, long time."

"Mom! You're not going to, are you, you're not going to do something crazy are you?" She was half-crying into the phone. The irony of asking if she would do something crazy was not lost on me, but I was really worried. I felt myself panicking, something I hadn't experienced for months.

"No! No, Bella, no. I'm okay. I promise. There is nothing wrong with me. But I can't call. It's not safe for me and it's not fair to you. You need a new life without me in it, for real. That's why I called, really. Not because I'm going to do something drastic, but I feel like you deserve to say goodbye."

I didn't know what to say to that. Part of me wanted to get the letters I'd written with Kate and read them all out to her, but I didn't see the point. Tanya sighed.

"Bella, do you want me to come back and turn myself in?" Her voice was so quiet, and so sad.

"What?"

"I could. It would be difficult, but I could come back and turn myself in to the police. If that's what you wanted."

"Don't ask me that!" I had never, even in my teen years, ever yelled at her that hard. I heard stirrings upstairs, and I realized Esme must have heard me scream, but I couldn't stop.

"That is so unfair! How can you, how, no. You can't ask me that question." I quieted myself down the best that I could, but I realized that I was quickly slipping into a panic attack. I tried to count down, like I'd practiced in Kate's office, but then Tanya was speaking again, and crying.

"I am so sorry. I shouldn't have, I am so sorry. Bella I, I just want to do what's right. I don't know what's the right thing to do any more. I never wanted this to happen, I just wanted to love you, and I don't know what I need to do to make this better for you. I am so, so sorry. I love you, and I'm sorry. I –" She cut off, and I heard a shifting noise in the background on her end.

"Bella, I have to go darling. I love you." I didn't realize I was crying until one of my tears fell off my chin onto my chest. All I could feel was me gasping. It felt like I was quickly running out of air

"Bella, I love you." She said it a bit more urgently, pleading.

"I love you too, mom." I choked out, and then the line cut. Just like that, we were separated. That was the last time I spoke to Tanya Denali.

A few seconds later, Esme opened my door. Later, she told me she'd been knocking but all she heard was me crying. She immediately sat down next to me on the bed, and pulled me into a hug. She rubbed my back until I calmed myself down enough to speak.

"Edward." I said, "Edward and Sam."

"They're both on their way, sweetheart. What happened?" I was still gasping, but I was starting to feel better. Still, I didn't know how to say it in a way that wouldn't be alarming, so I just shook my head.

"Let's go upstairs." Esme said eventually, when my breathing slowed down. I nodded, and the two of us walked upstairs. We sat down, but I felt too restless. I stood up, and started pulling out ingredients for a quiche. I was just mixing the wet ingredients for a pie crust when Edward and Sam practically ran in the front door.

"Bella, what happened?" It was Sam who spoke; Edward was too busy pulling me into a hug. I looked up, between Sam, Edward, and Esme, and then for a brief second I let myself relax into Edward's hug. Then I stepped back, and looked at Sam.

"Tanya just called me. She called me to say goodbye."


	33. Chapter 32

**A/N: I honestly don't have a good explanation for why this is late. I'm really sorry. I'm working on it, I promise. **

**I don't own this world or these characters, just my plot. **

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What I expected was for Edward to pull me into another hug and ask how I was feeling. I expected Sam to ask me some questions about the nature of the phone call. I expected to finish making my quiche, and have a conversation about the phone call over breakfast. I expected to make a therapy appointment with Kate after the longest workday ever. Instead, Sam and Edward exploded into action.

Sam immediately reached forward and grabbed my phone out of my hands, and he was out the door in five seconds flat. I could hear the sirens. Edward was hustling me towards the door as well, and next thing I knew he was literally strapping me into his car before sliding in and we were off.

"Edward, what's going on?" I asked, His jaw was clenched, and he was gripping the steering wheel so hard his hands were losing color.

"Bella, just, give me a minute." He said. I knew he wasn't angry with me, I knew him better than that, but he looked furious. So, I didn't say anything until we pulled into the station.

"Edward, what's going on?" I asked again, as he hopped out of his car and moved around to open my door. He shook his head, wordlessly holding a hand out to me. I took it, and he led me into an office where Sam was already sitting with two police officers and my cell phone. Edward kissed me on the head, and then left, his mouth firmly sealed.

"Sam?" I asked, he gestured for me to slide into a seat.

"We're trying to get a tap on the phone." Sam told me, as he and the officers messed around with my phone and the machinery around the table.

"What?"

"Your phone. We're trying to see if we can find out where the call came from."

"Definitely a burner phone." One of the officers added.

"Looks like it's not from the States at all." Sam muttered. I couldn't see what they were doing from where I sat, but I was irritated.

"Don't you have to ask my permission to tap my phone?" I asked.

"No." The other officer didn't even look up as they answered me.

"Oh. Well, do you need me to be here? Can I go…" I wasn't even sure where I wanted to go, but I needed a minute to process what was going on.

"I need to tell work I'm going to be late." I added.

"Sorry, Bella, but you can't leave. Hutchkins, page someone to notify Edward to call into her workplace."

"Um, okay." I said. I have no idea how long it was that they tapped my phone. I wasn't wearing real clothes, I hadn't even brushed my teeth.

I didn't get to work until 1 PM, and I was irritable for the rest of the day. Even my chattiest work friends gave me a wide berth. By the time my day was almost done I was slamming the computer as I typed and had finished less than an hour's worth of work. When Edward texted that he was parked by the door, I decided everything could wait till the next day.

I was still a bit upset when I slammed the door as I got in the car, leaning back in the seat eyes closed.

"Rough day?" Edward asked, as he pulled out the car.

"How was your day?"

"We got a lead on a missing person's case – the one I've been working on with Masen – and he's really excited about it. He's going up to investigate when his shift is over because he, apparently, can't wait until tomorrow. Some guy saw something fishy at a gas station and wrote down the plate number and then –" I let his voice wash over me for the drive back. To my surprise, we didn't go to his apartment but instead to the house.

"So basically I'm going to let him talk to the guy and see if he can find anything else out." Edward was still on the subject as we walked in to the house, immediately heading into the kitchen.

"Feel better?" he asked, I shrugged.

"Alright, so really, how was your day?"

"Frustrating. The whole thing was just frustrating."

"I know that couldn't have been easy."

"I still kind of can't believe the whole thing." I sighed. Edward pulled me into a hug, rubbing my back soothingly.

"I know. I can't believe that she would have called."

"What? No. I mean, I can't believe she called, but I really can't believe everything else."

"Everything else?" I had to pull back up to look at Edward, but his confusion seemed genuine. He was squinting down at me, eyebrows furrowed, and I had to fight not to frown up at him.

"Sam held me hostage for hours." I couldn't help speaking slowly, not to be condescending but because I genuinely didn't understand how he missed out on the obvious.

"Oh!" He snorted, then immediately looked down at me with a guilty smile.

"We're trying to find her. Isn't that what you want?" He asked. I frowned, his attitude not exactly making me feel any calmer. When he saw me frown he clammed up – it was like I could see him getting defensive.

"Bella, you were on the phone with a wanted criminal. That was our only lead. Of course Sam was going to need some time to make sure there was no possible way to find her."

"I get that. But if you're going to yank me out of bed in my pajamas, I just would've at least expected some warning."

"None of us had warning that Tanya was going to call, Bella. We all reacted how protocol dictates."

"I wasn't even allowed to contact my place of work!"

"Bella, I don't want to argue about this. Sam was focused on taking care of the issue at hand. Your convenience can't be his first priority."

"I don't see why I had to be there, Edward. That's all. I'm not saying Sam didn't do what he was supposed to do. But sitting in a room for hours where nobody will tell you what's going on? In pajamas?"

"What if Tanya had called back, Bella? What if she was lying about what she said to you, about going away? It wasn't just about keeping you in the dark for the sake of it Bella there's an element of protection. And if he had gotten through to Tanya what do you think – that he'd pick up and say 'Hi I'm Sam' and she wouldn't hang up instantly?"

"Maybe I hadn't thought about all of that Edward, sure. But all of that could have been explained to me."

"By who? It was a tense situation – everyone who could be involved was doing something." Edward released his nose and turned to look at me.

"Look, I'm sorry it put you in a bad mood and I'm sorry you don't get why it had to happen but I'm not sorry about how any of us handled the situation, Bella."

"Yeah, I can see that."

"Bella, you're not actually upset with me, are you?" Edward put both hands on my shoulders and bent down to stare me in the eyes, but I shrugged him off.

"I'm not trying to pick a fight or get upset over nothing Edward, I just…" I didn't have anything else to say, so I just shrugged.

"Is this a fight then? Do you want me to leave?" I still didn't have a response, so I shrugged again, and he huffed.

"I'm sorry you're mad." He said, standing.

"I think I just need some time to get over it. I know it doesn't make sense to you but today was just, for me it was just a lot." I said. He nodded, and walked out of the kitchen. When I heard the front door open, I wasn't surprised he chose to leave. I felt bad, but I was irritated enough to know that I needed space.

I was still in a bad mood a few hours later at dinner. We had leftovers of something Esme had made. She and Carlisle were chatting, and I could tell they were trying to include me, but I was just out of it. I wasn't too surprised when Esme asked if we could talk after dinner.

We went down to the living room area and sat down on opposite ends of the couch.

"Are you upset about this morning?" One thing I really appreciate about Esme is that she won't beat around the bush if she's concerned. I nodded, then sighed.

"I understand that there are certain protocols that have to be followed and choices that are made for my safety. I think sometimes, because of how I felt about everything back when all of this started, people think I'm still opposed to this whole thing and I'm not. I just, wanted to be in the loop. I think – I've gone through a lot and I think I've cooperated when I know what's going on. I just wanted to know."

"Of course." Esme responded almost immediately. "I, I understand where you're coming from. And then I understand where Edward is coming from too because he's so protective. I, he gets that from his dad. Carlisle saved me, you know. And Edward, I think when he was younger he picked up on that, how protective Carlisle is of the people he loves and Edward is the same way. And then with his job…sometimes, you're going to need to remind him that you're an adult, Bella. He doesn't – you are already aware of the bad things in the world. He doesn't need to keep you safe from them." Esme laughed self-consciously.

"Thank you."

"Oh, don't mind me, I'm still his mom. I'm probably more than a little biased. You know pregnancy wasn't easy for me and Carlisle and we decided to stop at one, so we both probably were a little protective too, maybe overprotective a little bit." I smiled as she looked down.

"Edward is one of the most caring people I've ever met in my life, and determined, and driven. I don't doubt that for a second. I'm frustrated, but this really helped me see things from his perspective. Thank you."

Esme smiled, and then just like that we were talking about one of her new clients. No awkwardness, no lingering.

I didn't have too much time to be upset with Edward anyways, because the next day I was getting up to hear the verdict about Jane. The morning of the sentencing, Alice and Angela picked me up. They hadn't come to every trial, but despite the fact that it was a Wednesday they took off work to be with me. Even Esme was coming when she left a morning consultation with a client.

Alice spoke about lighthearted things the entire drive over, trying to keep my mind off of it. I know I must have seemed so out of it, gazing out the window silently. But I couldn't contain my thoughts. For the first time since the whole thing had started it was coming to an end, except that I hadn't really processed that it would be over. It hit me hard on the drive, that everything was done, the final verdict was about to be read, and everything that had happened to me would be final.

Everything else about what happened is documented in all of the footage that was taken that day. We pulled up in Angela's car with me crouched down in the back, but the second we started walking up to the courthouse cameras were on us. Angela and Alice flanking my side, walking up to the courthouse, looked so different. Alice was all smiles, still trying to keep everything light, while Angela had a no-nonsense frown and was all business. I looked like a zombie, but to be fair I felt like a zombie. I didn't even hear the questions the reporters were yelling at me.

My girls shepherded me into the courtroom, and my family took over from there. I didn't see Nessie until her arms were around me, followed by my Mom. As we walked forward to the front of the courtroom in a big huddle, I felt a little bit better.

We sat there in a row, all of us together, me sitting between my mom and Nessie. Alice, Angela, and Jasper sat to Nessie's left, and to Renee's right was Charlie, Jake, and Liz. As the judge began to speak, everything was a blur. I'm not going to re-hash the whole day. If you've watched the movie I know you've seen the highlights. If not, it's all over the internet. In real life, I didn't really pay attention. I knew Jane was going to be sentenced to something, most likely. Sam had told me that as soon as she had changed her verdict. Instead, I stared at her.

With everything still turning around in my mind, I had so many conflicting feelings. I wanted to tell her that Tanya had called me. I wanted to ask her if she was okay. But at the same time, a growing part of me wanted to never see her again. To start my life over and put it all behind me.

After everything that I went through, the months of worrying, therapy, guilt, and having my life completely upturned, I thought that the final verdict reading would be an impactful moment. But if anything, the reading was almost anti-climactic. After closing arguments from each set of lawyers, the jury left for their final deliberation.

During the recess, I didn't move a muscle. I was very aware of the huge throng of reporters just outside the room, and I had no energy to deal with it. Everyone went to grab food except Renee and I, and the two of us sat in the courtroom next to each other. They took Jane away during the recess, but for most of the time in the room I sat staring at the empty bench. It wasn't until Charlie handed me a sandwich that I looked away.

When everyone came back, the judge didn't waste any time. He announced what ended up being one of the most controversial verdicts of its age. Jane Denali was found guilty of kidnapping a minor. However, due to my positive upbringing, she was sentenced to 20 years in prison, the minimum sentence, with a chance of parole after 10 years for good behavior.

As soon as the verdict was read there was an uproar. People have asked me what I think about all of the people who came to the trial, but the truth is I don't know or care who they were. I know some of them were press and paparazzi in disguise, some of them were children's rights group activists, some of them were random people who had free time and were curious. I know some people clapped when her verdict was read, others were immediately upset. I know the judge had to call for order in the court. But in that moment the only thing I focused on was Jane. Her face fell forward, and I couldn't tell if it was sadness or relief. The prison guards stood her up and walked her out, and just like that she was gone. It was over.

As soon as she was out of our sight, Renee and I stood. Charlie put his arm around Renee's waist, rubbed my back, and then began to shepherd us out. People kept trying to get our attention, some yelling, some actually grabbing on to me. Jasper and Jake stood on the fringes of our group and kind of kept people at bay while the rest of us tried our best just to keep our heads down and stay together. When we finally got out of the room there were even more people. A huge crowd stood in the lobby of the courtroom, and even when I shut my eyes I saw the flashing.

All of a sudden, I was pulled into a familiar hug.

"Masen, where did you come from?"

"Guys, come this way. You're not getting out the front." He addressed our whole group. I opened my eyes just a bit to see Liz grasp his hand then I closed them and we walked. Under Masen's arm I was still clinging tightly to Renee's hand, which I didn't even realize until I saw it on the news later.

We walked for what felt like an eternity before Masen leaned down to whisper "your boy wants to see you Bella, but he doesn't know if you're still mad." I shook my head, and then seconds later Edward pulled me into his arms. I could hear the camera flashes going off, but I just burrowed in closer.

"Bella, this is going to be rough. Where do you – are you crying? Are you alright?" I didn't realize that I was crying until he pointed it out, and I furiously tried to wipe the tears away. I opened my eyes and looked around at my loved ones. My parents and my sister were there. Alice and Angela were there along with Jasper. Masen stood there with Liz and Jake. Behind Masen Esme gave me a sad smile when we made eye contact.

Eventually, we all went our separate ways in a multitude of police vehicles. I ended up going to Forks with my family and Edward, but by the time we got there, I was numb. I spent the rest of the day in bed, sometimes with Renee and Nessie and sometimes just with Edward, but the next morning Edward made me get up. He drove me back to his parents' house, and early that evening, he took me to Kate's.

It took five seconds of Kate looking at me and not saying anything before I finally, really let myself cry. She pushed the tissues over to me and let me get it out of my system. I cried and I cried, and Kate didn't say anything until I was able to pull myself together.

"Do you feel better?" She asked, and I nodded. Then shrugged.

"Kind of. I just…I feel kind of ridiculous."

"Why?"

"I want to be angry at Jane. Isn't that messed up? I want to think that she's getting what she deserved. But I can't, I just feel so…helpless. I feel like…I wish I could have prevented that. She's going to prison. For at least ten years. That's…her whole life is over and it hurts. It hurts to think of her like that. I wish I could've stopped this somehow. I want to know my mom and my dad. But I wish I didn't have to lose Jane to do it. But I don't know what to feel. I don't know how to make myself okay with this."

"Bella, if you were able to flip your feelings about Jane and Tanya just like that, I'd have to evaluate you for a personality disorder. You spent almost your entire life developing a relationship with them. It's alright to worry about what's going to happen to Jane."

"I know that. I know I shouldn't try to control it or decide what I should feel and what I think I should be going through. Especially since what she told me, why she did it, it was so…I'm not some special snowflake. I'm not, I wasn't a miracle. I was just a baby. I was just a regular baby. I didn't ask for any of this."

"Bella, what you are working through is really complex. The rose colored glasses are off, and you know now that Jane and Tanya projected a lot of their insecurities onto you. That obsession was not normal, and their behavior was not acceptable, and it can be hard to accept that reality and still accept the relationship you have with them. Even with Jane going to prison, those feelings aren't going to prison with her. But Bella, you don't need to have one without the other. Don't try to force yourself out of loving or caring about them, and don't try to force yourself into accepting their actions and reasonable or acceptable. Be where you are."

So, that's what I tried to do.


	34. Chapter 33

**A/N: Hey guys! It has been a loooong time, and I am so sorry for that. Between health issues, traveling every 3-4 weeks for work, and the general strains of adulthood, I wasn't writing this the way I needed to be. But then something happened in the new year, and I got a rush of inspiration. My muse is back! So, we'll be getting back to regular updates, every Saturday.**

**I hope you guys enjoy this Chapter. This is kind of the beginning of what I think of as "Act 2" of this story in some ways. As usual I don't own these characters or this world, just my plot.**

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I didn't realize how true the saying "Life goes on" is until I had to wake up two days after the final verdict was read and get myself to work. I didn't particularly want to go. I would have much preferred to continue wallowing in bed, but life doesn't work that way.

I went to work, came back to the house, went to work, came back to the house, and it wasn't until 5 days post-trial that I realized that I was aimless because I hadn't spoken to Edward. I tried to balance my guilt at not calling him with wondering why he hadn't called me, but eventually I gave in and on my drive back from work I called him at the station.

"Super busy Bella, can't talk." He answered immediately, shocking me. I blinked.

"Oh, okay. I'll call you later." I barely got the words out before he hung up. With nothing to do, I decided to drive to Alice's. I had bumped into her running some files to her floor at work, and she looked bored, so I figured she would want to talk.

Luckily, because I had to turn around, by the time I got there she was already home. She buzzed me in, and the two of us sat at the kitchen table.

"What brings you by? And don't try to say it's a social visit because you look pretty upset."

"Wow, okay Alice. Hello to you too." Alice rolled her eyes at me, and I had to smile just a bit.

"Okay, fine. I think Edward is mad at me. And before you say what you're going to say I tried calling him and he basically brushed me off." Alice frowned as I spoke, and as soon as I was done she patted my hand.

"Have you talked to him since he dropped you off after Kate?"

"No."

"Oh, well he probably just thinks you're mad at him still." Alice brightened up, like that solved everything.

"No. Wha – why would he think that? I told him on the day of the trial that I wasn't mad at him."

"Bella, you told Masen. Masen told Edward, and you know things get lost in translation when you two communicate through other people. Plus, you were in a vulnerable place that day. That doesn't mean you weren't angry with him. When was the first time you called him after everything went back to normal?"

"Today."

"Ok, well, that's why he thinks you're mad! You had like a week to call him and you didn't, and you were the one who said you needed space. Plus, he's really busy at work with that case he and Masen have going on." I stared at her.

"How did you know about that?"

"Jasper told me!" She said, like it was obvious. When I stared at her, confused, she kept going.

"Oh, him and Jasper talk all the time now. Masen too. Even Ben sometimes and that guy on their team…Sam! Yeah, you me and Ang are going to be those best friends who date best friends pretty soon." I blinked. I hadn't realized that. I knew that they were friendly with each other because whenever the six of us did things together they all got along, but I hadn't realized they'd developed an actual friendship.

"Yeah, I called while he was working. But Alice, I don't know. Don't you think if he thought I was mad, me calling would be a good thing?"

"Bella, just call him tonight and stop worrying about nothing." I sighed, leaning back on the couch. I decided that maybe Alice was right, and I was worried about nothing.

"You can call Angela if you don't trust me." Funnily enough, it was something I was sure Angela and Alice would agree on. I shook my head.

"No, I'll call him later. But, I do want to ask you about work today. You looked miserable when I passed your desk."

"Just bored. I don't know, I love my job, but it's less hand-on than I want, even after being promoted. I think I'd have to be promoted like twice more to be making any kind of real decisions. Don't worry about it. I think it's this new campaign we're all doing too."

"Okay, if you're sure."

"Bella I'm fine. Stop worrying about me, worry about how you're going to convince Edward that you're not mad at him!"

"Convince him?" I knew where this was going.

"Yeah, come on. You can't just tell him. That's so boring. Do something nice for him!"

"Nice like what Alice?"

"Nice like…invite him to that stupid party on Saturday. For Halloween. Do a couple's costume. Make a big deal out of it, something that says you're excited about going with him because you're excited about your relationship!"

"Really?"

"Yes! Think about it Bella, you guys barely pass the test of normal dating people. You didn't even notice that he and Jasper were friends. Now that the trial is over, do normal dating things with him! Show him off! He is your boyfriend, and, I love Jasper very dearly but Edward is really attractive. Romance isn't just for men Bella, show him that you're proud to be his girlfriend."

"I will invite him Alice, but I don't think he's going to read all that into the invite."

"Well, we'll see. I think he'll be surprised that you want to go with him. You two don't ever go out by yourselves, and I don't care what the press says but you're not a homebody Bella and neither is he! You need to do more fun things, and the costume party is always fun. Intense, and way overpopulated, but fun."

"Ok Alice, sure." I smiled. I wasn't sure if I believed her about his reaction, but it would be fun and he definitely couldn't still think I was mad at him after that. The more I thought about what I wanted to see us dressed up as, the more excited I got.

By the time I went home two hours later, I was excited to call him again. I walked down the stairs to my room, flopped onto the mattress, and pulled out my phone to call.

"Hey, Bella." He sounded reluctant, and again I wondered if Alice was wrong.

"Hey, if you're still busy I can call back tomorrow." I offered.

"No, I just, I've had a long day."

"Oh, sorry. I just wanted to – we never talked about my office Halloween party but it's this weekend. I kind of hoped we would go together? I was thinking about all the couple costumes we could do and I thought it might be funny to – well, anyways, if you're busy this week you could just give me your sizes and I can shop. If you want to come." Edward was quiet for long enough that I thought he might say no, so I was taken aback when he laughed into the phone.

"Really?"

"Um, yes?"

"I…Jasper told me about going with Alice and asked what we were going as and I thought maybe you were still mad at me and wanted to go alone."

"No…I'm not mad at you Edward. I'm not going to say I completely understand why that had to happen like that, but it's all over. I…I've missed you, actually. I thought maybe you were mad at me."

"No! No, just busy and trying to give you space. I've missed you too. I should've called, I'm sorry. What were your ideas?"

"Huh?"

"For the costume. We don't have a lot of time so it can't be anything too fancy." Then, heat was rising to my cheeks. I was so focused on finding out if Edward was angry with me that I forgot I was about to admit something potentially humiliating.

"I was thinking maybe…uh…vampire?"

"…what?"

"You know, like, 'I vant to suck your blood', a vampire."

"Wow…you know I was expecting prince charming, or maybe a cop if you wanted to be funny. I wasn't expecting that! Why vampires?" Edward laughed again, and even though my face was burning at that point I had to laugh along.

"Do you really want to know?" I asked, covering my eyes even though I knew he couldn't see me.

"Yes, especially if there's a story."

"Oh man, I can't believe I have to say this. But when I was like, 16 I watched Interview with a Vampire and Louis was so hot…I don't even think I paid attention to the plot I just…I've liked vampires ever since. It doesn't have to be vampires."

"Sixteen, huh? That's like seven years of vampires, right? I'd hate to break tradition."

"Oh, no I've never done the costume before. It's a couples' costume for sure, I mean I want to be your victim not a vampire, and no guy I dated ever wanted to dress up. They thought it was lame."

"Well then, Bella. I'm honored to drink your blood."

"Really!"

"If it makes you that excited, then definitely!"

"I'm really glad I called you."

"Hey, I know it's getting late, but can I come over when Masen and I finish up?"

"Yeah, absolutely. Like I said, I've missed you."

"See you soon, Bella."

"See you soon."

A few days later, my dreams came true. Edward and I had found the time to meet up at a costume store, and we'd gotten him a vampire costume that had the white billowy shirt of Louis, and a cape that looked regal rather than tacky. I had him ditch the awful red vest and medal, and we loosened the shirt so that it billowed like his cape when he moved. With his hair falling forward on his forehead and a little bit of fake blood on his face, he was like a weird Louis/Dracula hybrid and it was better than any fantasy I'd ever had.

"Oh, you guys look so cute, do a pose!" We had gone to Jasper and Alice's apartment to get ready with them. Angela and Ben were also there, getting dressed up to go to some party with Ben's friends, and Alice was going from person to person and insisting on pictures.

"Alice, you can try to take my picture, but I won't show up." Edward winked at her, and Alice burst into giggles. Alice had gone all out for Halloween as usual. Every year she commissioned an elaborate costume for herself and Jasper – this year he was dressed up as an old-time soldier and she was a Southern Belle, complete with black hair extensions giving her an elaborate curled hairdo.

"Oh stop!" Alice swatted him with her fan, and then moved over to pester Angela and Ben. They had gone as characters from some game they both apparently played – all I knew was that Angela wouldn't be wearing that little unless she really trusted Ben so their relationship had to be in a great place.

"You know, when you were trying to convince me about this costume you could've mentioned what you'd be wearing." Edward surprised me, leaning in close and speaking low into my ear.

"I said I'd be your victim." I tried to keep my tone light, as his arms slid around me.

"I thought you meant that little curly haired girl from the movies." I turned around so I was facing him, and he leaned down to kiss my neck before straightening up.

"No, Edward I would never want to be her, she's trapped as a child forever! No, when I said victim I meant…victim."

"Hmm, I can see that." He took a step back and looked at me. I had found a Maid Marion costume, and the night before Alice had helped me rip up the bottom so it looked like I had been running in the woods. Then I'd dipped my hands in fake blood and run them over the exposed parts of my legs in bloody handprints. Lastly, Alice had helped me paint a kind of realistic fang bite mark and dripping blood on my neck. I hadn't necessarily meant for the end result to be sexy, but clearly Edward thought it was.

"Hey lovebirds, group photo!" Ben broke us out of the moment, and we all came together to take a selfie. After that, Angela and Ben had to leave for their party, and after a few more rounds of pictures the four of us went to the office.

We had the best night. The party was as overcrowded and as fun as ever, and a lot of my coworkers had wonderful things to say about me and about Edward. Even Mary had fun giving Edward a bit of a hard time on my behalf, before telling him that he was sweet boy. I got to meet some of the newer people who worked on Alice's floor, Jasper won an apple bobbing contest, and we had an all-around great time.

With Edward and I back on a good page, my life started to return to a new normal. I was back at work on a regular schedule, and with no court dates or drama happening in my life everything felt settled. So when I got a letter in the mail telling me that I was approved for visitation with Jane in prison, I didn't know what to do.

Edward and Kate didn't make me feel much better either. Edward told me that I had to decide if I wanted to drag her with me into my new future, and Kate more tactfully said that it was my choice to do what felt right, but neither of them really gave me a solid answer. Still, when I decided to visit her Edward drove me.

It was nothing like visiting her in jail. I had to be on the list to visit her on a specific date, and then I had to wait for her to say she wanted to see me. When she did, I dressed up and made my way to the prison. It was honestly fairly creepy, and it was made worse by the fact that I had to pass so many other people visiting their loved ones – some sobbing, one woman pregnant and yelling furiously into her phone. Edward couldn't come in with me because he wasn't on Jane's list, but he insisted on waiting in the car.

Instead of a personal room, I was told to have a seat at a table in one big room with a lot of other people. There was security all over the room. I waited for about 5 minutes before Jane came out, wearing an ugly tan jumpsuit. She looked so much more haggard than I was prepared for. And when she saw me, she looked like she felt worse.

"Aww, Bella, you shouldn't have visited me." She smiled softly as she said it, but I could tell she meant it. I didn't know what to say.

"I'm upset with you. I think that you did a horrible thing, and I think you deserved to go to prison. But you're also my aunt. You raised me. And for 23 years of my life you were there for me. Of course I came to see you, I'm not happy with you, but you're still Jane."

Jane nodded, and grabbed my hand on the table.

"I don't want you to see me like this." Jane admitted, looking down at the table. "It's – I meant what I said about it being worth it Bella but it's hard to – this isn't who I am."

I had nothing to say. It was weird; I wasn't sure that I should have come.

"But you are here. And even as much as it makes me uncomfortable to be this person in front of you, I am so, so happy to see your face and see that you're okay. That can make this whole thing worth it for me."

It was awkward. As she spoke, in the background I could hear other hushed conversations happening all around us. A guard slammed his baton on a table behind me and I nearly leapt out of my chair. I realized I was shaking, and Jane realized too because she took her hand away and smiled sadly at me.

"Bella, I love you."

"I love you too." I said automatically, but it felt off, hollow. I was just so uncomfortable. Jane frowned then.

"Bella, I think one day you'll be ready to see me here. But not now. I think you should go." Before I could even say anything, she stood and walked back towards the guards. Left alone, I took a second to compose myself before making my way out.

My first sign that something wasn't quite right was that rather than waiting in the car, Edward was standing in the lobby of the prison. As soon as he saw me he rushed up towards me.

"Apparently Channel six has a connection with the prison." Edward frowned as he slid an arm around my shoulder, guiding me to the doors. I winced, looking up at him as he hurried us out of the building.

"How bad is it?" I asked, but I needn't have bothered. The first microphone and camera were in our face within 10 feet of the door.

"Isabella, Edward, were you visiting Jane together?" "Isabella how do you think your relationship will change now that Jane is in prison?" "Edward, asking permission to date her?" I had to bite down hard to resist yelling at the reporter who asked the last question, but Edward seemed completely unfazed.

Unfortunately, there was a group of reporters blocking our path to the car. Edward tried to order them to move, but I sighed.

"You want a statement?" I asked, frowning. Immediately the reporters all quieted, and there were about five or six mics in my face.

"All I want to say is that I am so thankful to all of the amazing people in my life that have been my support throughout this whole process. I want to thank Alice, Angela, Ben, Jasper, and Masen, my friends, for making my life feel normal. My sister Nessie, for being someone I never knew I needed in my life. Edward and his parents for…well, everything. And my parents Renee and Charlie, who I just feel really lucky to have in my life."

"What about those rumors that you're looking to sell your story!" Edward was trying to tug me through a small hole that was made in the group of reporters to the car.

"I don't know! What would I even do? The best I could imagine is a movie or something. I haven't nailed anything down yet." I yelled, as Edward all but carried me into the car seat. He shut the door, and was around the car and in the seat in what felt like a literal second. As soon as the car started up, the press started to dissipate, and Edward and I were out of there before they could even think to get in their cars and follow us.

"Do you think they'll leave you alone because you said something?" Edward asked, only I could tell by the way he was gripping the steering wheel that it was rhetorical. I had to answer anyways.

"No, but I think if I'm boring when they ask me, they'll get tired of me." Edward shrugged.

"At this point, who knows if you're right. Done is done." Done was done. So, Edward and I decided not to talk about it.

For the rest of the day we did more normal couple things, and my visit with Jane wasn't even brought up.

The next morning, I was back at work. I parked, walked into the building, and went up to my desk. To my surprise, when I pulled out my cell phone I had 7 missed calls from the drive. I put in my headphones to listen to my messages, and they were all from different film studios and directors telling me that they would love to work on my film.

After 2 more hours of at least 2 messages coming in every 15 minutes, I gathered that Edward had been right – it was dumb of me to speak to the news. Apparently, my comment that I could imagine doing a movie was taken as a statement that I would like to do a movie.

Over the next 2 weeks, it only got worse. Many people started to call back with offers for money, until I had to get a new phone and a new phone number. Edward told me not to disconnect the old one, because that would just motivate them to find my new number, but that left me not knowing what to do. I was just about at my wits end when Alice asked if she could step in and field the calls. I had no idea what she meant, or why she would want to, but when I said yes her answering smile looked dangerous.


	35. Chapter 34

**A/N: Ok 2 weeks in a row! Things are starting to shift for Bella...**

**As usual I do not own this world nor these characters, just my plot. Enjoy!**

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After a week of hearing nothing from Alice, I figured that she was probably having a lot of fun rejecting all the offers. I put it out of my mind. After two weeks, I honestly forgot that she had my old phone. When she came to me and said that she had a surprise for me, I figured it would be a girls' night or something similar. I was wrong.

Instead, Alice, Angela and I met up in a café one Saturday, where Alice handed me a stack of very detailed spreadsheets. About people. Directors. People who wanted to turn my life into a movie.

To put it lightly, I was very skeptical. The reason I had given Alice the job in the first place was because I didn't want to deal with any of the people making the offers. Angela stayed out of it, telling me and Alice to work it out, but I almost left the table. But Alice convinced me to at least hear her out, and she started explaining to me why she thought it was a good idea for me.

Alice explained that when she had first started fielding the calls, she was just rejecting every proposal. Both studios and individual directors were calling and asking all sorts of questions, and she kept ignoring it. But eventually, once the offers started coming in at seven figures, she had to at least hear them out.

On the fly, she decided that if a studio called she wanted to know which director or directors they were considering for the project so that she could Google them and get back to them. So, within the span of a week, Alice had devised her own system for rating these directors based on if they'd worked on a similar project before, if she liked their work, if she thought I'd like their work, and things that people who'd worked with the directors said about their attitudes. Apparently, she got rid of any director who had never directed a serious drama before, made a movie she didn't like or I didn't like, and anyone who was known to have problems with the women who were in their movies.

At that point in the conversation even Angela was hooked in to the conversation. I still wasn't sure, but Alice had won Angela over to her side.

"How much money, exactly, did they get up to?" Angela asked eventually, interrupting Alice as she explained how she evaluated directors who were less well-known. But when Alice told us the numbers that people had started to throw out, both of us were stunned.

"Just to make a movie about me?"

"Well, here's the thing. It would be mostly yours, but a chunk of it would go to Edward. You'd be the focus of the movie Bella but most of the studios want to focus on the romance and that's Edward's story to tell too. But still."

"Right, have you talked to Edward about this?"

"Bella, Edward's not going to even think of doing it until he knows you're on board. But he would make - too."

"Oh." Suddenly it wasn't even about me. With that money, if Edward agreed, he could reinvest so much into his agency.

"Okay, let me hear about these directors."

"Here, let me just walk you through the top seven. Then you can come up with your own set of requests and I can get back to them."

"Requests?"

"You know, like 'don't put me puking in the police station in the film.'"

"Oh. Um, yeah I'll get those to you." I could think of a few moments that I didn't necessarily want broadcast.

"Okay, well here are the directors."

The first director Alice brought up was an older, somewhat well-known director. He'd never won an Oscar or any other award, but he had a lot of fairly well-known and respected films and he was nominated once or twice. Alice told me that after speaking on the phone with him personally, he was less concerned with the romantic aspect of the film but really wanted to focus on what I had been through and me coming out stronger at the end. As she explained his vision it made me curious, and I agreed that I liked what he was talking about.

The next two directors I didn't like because both were really focused on the romance. One of the directors sounded like he really wanted to make the film about Edward saving me, and while I appreciated how important Edward had been in my life I didn't want a movie where I might come across helpless. The other director had asked Alice a lot of kind of personal questions about Edward and me. She had directed one of Alice's favorite romances, which is why she was on the list, but I didn't feel like I wanted our business to be put out there so publically.

The fourth director Alice brought up worked for a big budget studio and wanted to shoot a really dynamic movie, but I was intrigued by the way he described it. He wanted to focus on the realities of kidnapping, starting the movie from when Jane was brought into custody and drawing in facts about other missing children's cases. It sounded more like a biopic, which was really cool. We put him on the list.

The next director Alice brought up had a similar vision, coming from the same studio, but it felt like he was trying to include too many elements. Hearing their two versions of the same story back to back, I liked the first version better.

Next, was a younger, female director that worked for an indie studio I'd never heard of. She hadn't made any movies I had ever heard of either, but after hearing her vision for my story Alice had watched one of her movies on amazon and told me that it was amazing. Her vision was pretty interesting, to kind of use elements from my life juxtaposed with what was happening during the trial process to highlight how complicated the process really was. She also wanted to focus on the romance, but in a more authentic way than the other female director Alice had brought up.

After hearing her proposal, the last director's idea to be as true-to-life as possible just didn't resonate with me. So, I had a list of three.

The first thing I had to do was discuss it with Edward. Before moving forward, I wanted to know what he thought. But when I went over to his apartment, I was surprised by how excited he seemed. I had expected him to have some reservations, but he thought the idea of the film was cool. When I told him how much money Alice said that we both could make, each, he got more excited. Suddenly, Edward was on board the movie train.

Then I called my parents. I had already decided that one of my terms and conditions was going to be that if I got money, my parents got money too. After all, as much as this was something that had happened to me, losing a child was also something that had happened to them and if I was going to get money they deserved some too. But I didn't tell them that on the phone. I just wanted to be sure that they were on board about the movie. They weren't as interested as Edward was, but neither of them really minded and neither did Nessie.

Knowing that all of the important people in my life had been taken care of, I was finally completely comfortable with the movie and able to give Alice my demands. They were simple. For any offer that came in, I wanted my parents to get at least six figures of their own money. I wanted to make sure that Edward and I were both covered equally, whether the movie wanted to focus on him or not. And, I wanted to be able to be a part of the process with the right to say no if I felt strongly about something.

Once Alice had my list, it wasn't long before she had set up meetings with all 3 of the directors. All of them were willing to fly in on one weekend to meet me and negotiate potential terms for the offers, and Edward, Masen, Alice, Angela and I were ready to hear them. I brought my friends with me because Alice had clearly developed the needed skillset to handle these meetings and Angela was much shrewder than I was when it came to new people. I had long since learned that Edward and Masen were more or less a package deal.

The first person we met with was the biopic director. Because he didn't really want to focus on the romance, he was more curious about Edward's past cases and wanted to know if Edward thought any of those families where he'd succeeded in finding their child would be interested in having their stories told as vignettes in the film. The more he spoke, the more I realized that his offer wasn't really about my story at all. This director wanted to make a movie about child abductions, and I happened to be the popular topic that he could use to sell the movie. I didn't hate it, and I did think that it would be an important film. He was offering a lot of money to make it happen too, and he'd accepted my term sheet right away. But I wasn't sure if it was the movie I'd really pictured.

I thought, because they spoke about so much, that Edward would love this director and want to move forward with that project. But he and Masen agreed with me, and so did Alice and Angela. I wondered if maybe one of Edward's other cases might be a better story for him to focus on, but there was no real way to suggest that without telling him he wasn't going to get this story, and none of us wanted to tell him until we were sure. So, we shook his hand and left.

We were doing these interview meetings in the Cullens' home, so while we waited for the second director to arrive everyone took bathroom breaks or got a snack from the kitchen. Edward slid over next to me.

"What?" I asked, leaning in to him.

"What do you want from doing this movie?" He asked. I started to say what I typically said about wanting a happy ending, but it felt like a lie. The case was over. In a movie, Jane going to prison would be the happy ending, because there wasn't anywhere else to end the story. I wondered if I was just doing it because it fell into my lap, or for the money, but I knew myself better than that.

"I don't know" I said. He slid his arm around me and pressed a kiss to my shoulder.

"Well don't choose a director until you figure it out, or you might not get what you want."

With that advice, we met with the second director, the indie film director. She came with a notepad, and spent most of the time asking all of us questions about our lives, but especially me. She asked a few things about my childhood, a few about my adult life and how I felt about the media attention. When she asked about Edward and I, she didn't ask any obtrusive questions, but mostly asked about the timeline of our relationship. Then, she explained her vision again. She wanted the film to kind of demonstrate how complicated the situation was for everyone involved in how she put the scenes together. Her idea seemed to be very straightforward, and she seemed to really care about getting the details right.

When she left, I ran away to the bathroom to think about what Edward had said. I still wasn't sure what I hoped to get out of making the movie. It just felt important to me to get the story out there, and a movie seemed like the best way to do it.

The last director we met with was the established director. From the second he arrived at the Cullen's house with a driver, I was somewhat put off. He had the poor man waiting outside in the car for the duration of our meeting, and he led by saying that he could have flown us all out to Los Angeles to have the meeting in his office. I was somewhat impressed that he had storyboarded out a lot of the film. He had a strong vision for the film, starting with the kidnapping and working up until the day that the verdict was announced. Except, the more he talked about the film the more I realized that he had already made up his mind about what had happened. With some information he had probably gotten from Alice he had a few "pivotal moments" mapped out, and when I tried to suggest that one of his "moments" wasn't actually a big deal in my life he just winked and said that it would make for a better movie. He wasn't condescending, per se, but I got the feeling that he didn't want or need my input.

After meeting all 3 directors, I liked our second director the best as a person, but I also had other things to consider. She had the smallest budget, coming from an indie studio, which meant that any money she used to buy the rights would take money away from the project. The other two directors, by contrast, had money to spare. The biopic director had even offered to set up a retirement fund for Charlie and Renee rather than a one-time check.

Alice gave me a week to decide, and when we all left I thought that it would be the most difficult decision. However, when I woke up the next morning several things clicked for me.

The first, was when I saw myself suddenly in the mirror and realized, for the first time, how much I looked like Charlie. Both me and Nessie look a lot like our mother despite the brown hair. But I saw myself in the mirror and I saw Charlie's eyes and hair and even the shape of my face and for no explicable reason I just got really upset. It hit me that I might not have ever known that I looked my dad, or who my dad was, and that it was Tanya and Jane's fault, and I just got so angry. In retrospect, I think the anger was a long time coming, that I was keeping it suppressed, but it came out all at once.

I went about my Sunday more or less normally, unsure what to do about my anger, until Nessie called me to ask if I wanted to come to an open mic that she was in. I realized that she had a whole life of performances, school plays, sports, whatever she did, that I never witnessed. Then I realized that she had never witnessed any of mine, and neither had my parents. I got even angrier, even more upset.

I know that for some of you, this must seem strange. These were things that I had already acknowledged during the case, both to my family and to outsiders like Kate and Edward. But instead of feeling sad about it, for the first time I allowed myself to be mad at them. Instead of focusing on what Jane and Tanya had given me in return, I really acknowledged what they had taken away from me. I realized that they hadn't just stolen memories from Charlie, Renee, and Vanessa, they stole memories from me. They stole a life from me.

When that clicked, I knew that I couldn't do the biopic movie, and I couldn't work with a director who thought he had the story all figured out. If I could be so blindsided by my own emotions still, even after everything was supposedly wrapped up, I needed the flexibility. I needed to work with a director who was willing to listen to me and work with me, even as I sorted through everything that was going on in my life. With that in mind, I knew that the only director that I could work with was Shelly Cope.

I gave myself one day to sleep on it and think it over, and I told Alice the next morning. By the end of that Monday, the other two directors were notified, Shelly was hired, and we were all one contract away from the movie.


	36. Chapter 35

**A/N: Okay, you guys' reviews have seriously been making my entire week. I've had to try not to squeal in happiness while at work - nevermind that I shouldn't be checking my private email on work time... Anyways, things are starting to pick up with this whole movie business. Hope you all enjoy!**

**I don't own this world or these characters, still, somehow, but I do own my plot. **

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The day after I agreed to work with Shelly, Alice emailed all of us a ton of paperwork and told us to get a lawyer. She sent us to Jason Jenks, someone she and Jasper had worked with in the past for reasons she wouldn't tell me, and since I had no idea how to find a lawyer I met with him.

According to him, the agreement was pretty standard, if not a bit generous. My right to say no was written into the contract, as part of the creative terms, as was Edward's and my parents. The figure that they were willing to pay us wasn't nearly as high as some of the bigger studios that had pitched to us, but it was still more money than I knew what to do with. The contract stipulated that the studio had the exclusive rights to any creative project about my story for 5 years post-release, after which time any of us involved would be legally allowed to pursue other projects.

I signed immediately. I wasn't interested in haggling for more money or trying to squeeze another film or other work out of it. As long as Edward and my parents were taken care of, I was content. My parents signed immediately as well, both of them touched that I had thought to include them. Edward took the most time to sign. Before he was finished with the contract they had added an NDA that stipulated that any details that any of us shared that did not make it into the final project could not be released, and that in turn any details released about the project during its production would be released under mutual agreement. Essentially, he explained to me, he didn't want everyone in the world to know every detail of our lives because someone got chatty.

We were told that we would all get our checks in the mail once filming was completed, in order to give everyone the most amount of time possible to back out. Until those checks were signed and deposited all of our rights were still protected. I didn't care, but Edward was really adamant that everyone's rights be equally represented.

Then, it was time to get to work on the script.

When I agreed to work with Shelly, I almost forgot that she wouldn't be the one writing the actual script for the film. She had a very clear vision of what she wanted the storyline to look like, but the actual writing came down to Vlad, her script-writer. I wasn't sure what to expect form Vlad, but the very first question he asked me was if he could meet with Kate and me. I told him I'd get back to him, and in my first therapy appointment post-Thanksgiving I brought up the idea to Kate.

"Well, Bella, how do you feel about it?" I knew that Kate wouldn't give me a straight answer, I'd been prepared for it.

"I'm not sure. These sessions are really private to me – I don't even bring Edward or my parents. And I don't know why he wants to come, but I don't think I like the idea of him asking you questions about me without me knowing."

"Well, he wants to meet with both of us, right? Bella, I would never tell him anything about you without you being present to say yes or no. I legally couldn't, even if I wanted to."

"I know that." I said, but hearing it out loud did make me feel a bit better. Kate smiled knowingly.

"Sometimes, it's nice to get a reminder. Bella, I think the question here is, how deep are you willing to let him in to write this script?"

"Umm"

"I only ask because it sounds like what Shelly wants is based on your personal stories. And it sounds like what you want is a really honest film. In order to achieve that level of honesty Vlad is probably going to get pretty deep with you. Do you have a boundary in mind?"

"I want them to know everything they want to know."

"Well, part of this story has been you coming to therapy. Another part of is it you going to visit Jane in prison. Another part is you living with Edward's family. There's your whole life in Massachusetts. All of those are aspects of your life that Shelly and Vlad and whoever else might be on the team, might want access to. Are you comfortable with that?"

I opened my mouth to respond, but I had no idea what to say. I knew that I would probably have to talk about those things, but I had never thought of anyone wanting to come in and see them. The idea of taking Vlad, or even Shelly, to prison to see Jane was incredibly uncomfortable. Taking them to meet Edward's parents was fine, but not necessarily high-priority for me. And taking them to Boston was out of the question – both because it held a lot of uncomfortable memories and because I didn't want to take the time off for travel.

"Think about it, Bella." Kate smiled, ready to move on. "Anyways, how was your Thanksgiving. I know you spent it with your family."

"I think I want Vlad to come here." Once again, I had shocked Kate.

"Alright, why?"

"I don't want to bring him or Shelly on a tour of my life. And frankly, there's a lot that I don't think they need to see. But as much as I remember what I felt going through everything, I think that you probably have a different view. If I'm going to let him in to write the script, that's what I want him to see. An outsider's view of what I went through."

"Okay, I can do that. And remember Bella, any time he asks me a question, I'm going to look to you first. I don't care how much he wants to know, if you are not comfortable with that question all you have to do is shake your head, and I won't answer it. Is that alright?" I nodded.

"Good, now, Thanksgiving."

When I left, I set up the appointment with Kate and noted that I would be inviting Vlad.

To my surprise, when we sat down with Kate, Vlad immediately thanked her.

"I know that having to go through past details might be uncomfortable. Thank you for allowing us to have this conversation here. If anything gets to be too much, I would feel better having your expertise." It took me a minute to understand what he was saying, but when I got it I was touched. Vlad hadn't wanted to ask Kate about me. He wanted Kate there for my benefit. Just knowing that, I immediately felt so much more confident.

The actual questions that Vlad asked surprised me as well. He didn't ask for stories about my life. Instead, he asked me to describe my childhood – and he paid a lot of attention to how I felt and how I described both Tanya and Jane. Then, together, we laid out a timeline of everything that had happened since March. It was actually cathartic to lay it all out linearly. He again focused a lot on how I felt, but with everything that happened post-trial he also asked for a ton of details. To my surprise, he also brought up things that Edward had told him. I hadn't even realized they'd already spoken, but he brought up the time I locked myself in my room, which I had forgotten about completely, and the meeting with Didyme where we all initially said we wouldn't testify.

After hearing both of those through my perspective, he laughed and told me that Edward gave me a lot more credit than I gave myself, and suggested without saying it that I was very hard on myself.

The only question Vlad asked Kate was a doozy – he asked her to talk about how she felt I'd evolved emotionally from the beginning until the trial verdict was announced. To my surprise, Kate gave a very detailed, in-depth response. She talked about it as if she'd been charting out my progress, which I guess as my therapist she probably had been.

"Bella has worked very, very hard to process this the healthy way since the beginning. She had a few down moments, as would anybody, but I am very proud of the work she put in." Kate finished, smiling at Vlad. He smiled back, and then both of them looked at me where I sat – red as a tomato.

There wasn't too much time left after that. Vlad clarified a few more details, then shook our hands. He asked me if he could speak to my friends, and after texting them really quickly I gave him Alice, Jasper, and Angela's numbers. He told me that he was going to be speaking with my parents at the end of the week, and would try to talk to my friends by the end of the next week, and then he'd start writing.

Instead of going to back to the Cullen's house, I swung by Jasper's place to pick up Alice for a girls' night. We met up with Angela at our favorite restaurant, where I couldn't help but be a little reminiscent. The last time I'd been there I had no idea how my life was going to change. We didn't order one of everything, but we did get a few apps to split as we all got caught up.

Angela and Ben were still going strong, especially now that she finally admitted they were pretty serious. She told Alice and me about the new drama at work, that despite the fact that the big boss wasn't her direct boss, and Ben didn't work at the company, people were starting to claim she was getting favoritism. She tried to play it off like no big deal, but I knew she wouldn't have brought it up with Alice and me if it wasn't at least getting to her.

Alice and I didn't necessarily know how to respond either. She wasn't going to stop dating Ben, and it should have been obvious that there was no favoritism considering that a promotion she'd wanted had recently gone to a coworker. But she waved off our protests and told us that everything was fine – she was just irritated.

Meanwhile, Alice was beaming from ear to ear, telling me that because she arranged everything for me, the studio and Shelly considered her my agent for the project. It meant that she'd taken a sick day to sit in with them before they'd brought the contract to me, and she was having a blast talking to the rest of the team heads about me and the project plan.

She also told us that the plan was to have the script done by the end of the year so that Heidi, the casting director, could read it and pull her scenes for casting. I was shocked. December was less than a week away, and it seemed insane that anything could get done so quickly. When I spoke up, a pretty tipsy Alice rolled her eyes at me and told me that Vlad knew what his job was. After one more round of cocktails, we called it a night. Alice and Angela took cabs home, and I took a cab to spend the night at Edward's.

The last meeting Vlad wanted to have, was a meeting with Edward and I directly. According to him, he wanted to capture our dynamic accurately, which meant seeing us together somewhere we felt comfortable. So, the two of us invited him and Shelly to come out to a barcade with the two of us.

In theory, Edward and I had spent a ton of time together and, because he was my boyfriend, I didn't need to feel nervous around him anymore. But in actuality, because most of our time had been eclipsed by everything else going on in our lives, and because I felt weird knowing Shelly and Vlad would be watching us, I was extra nervous. I spent about 20 minutes staring in the mirror just trying to decide how I wanted to do my makeup, took the time to braid and flatiron my hair to make it super wavy, and 10 minutes before I was supposed to leave I ended up calling Alice to ask what I should wear.

I left 10 minutes late dressed in an old skirt I'd forgotten about – with shorts underneath because I knew we were going to play pool – and a tee shirt that I was pretty sure actually belonged to Edward. I was also armed with an overnight bag with work things and sleep things because realistically, I knew I was going to stay over with Edward.

Edward and I had agreed to meet at his place, so we could meet Shelley and Vlad together at the barcade. I had literally been in his apartment a few nights ago, but now it felt like a big deal. I walked up to the door slowly, and just as I was about to knock the door swung open.

Edward looked good. Great. He was wearing jeans that I didn't remember ever seeing in his closet, paired with a button down with rolled up sleeves over a tee shirt. It was nice, but it wasn't exactly a catalogue look. But something about how casual and happy he looked took it over the edge for me.

"Hey Bel –" I cut him off by going up on my toes to pull him in for a kiss, which lingered when he wrapped his arms around me pulling me closer. Suddenly, I forgot we had plans. Edward was still, stubbornly insistent that it "wasn't time" for us to sleep together yet – even though the case was over. I respected it, but that didn't stop me from wanting him.

He slid his hands under my skirt and I jumped up to wrap my legs around him, not even caring that we were out in the hallway. I was rewarded with a deep groan into my mouth and his hands tightening around me to hold me up.

"Edward did – whoa!" To be honest, I was willing to ignore Masen. But the second he heard him Edward let me go so quickly I almost dropped to the ground. He held me up with one arm, and half-turned to glare at Masen. Masen looked like he didn't know if he wanted to laugh or retreat.

"Sorry!" He said, and he was clearly fighting a smile. I was holding a laugh in too, but Edward looked much more rattled and I wondered if maybe his ban on sex was affecting him more than he let on.

"Come on Bella, let's go." Edward interrupted my thoughts. He brought my bag in from where I'd dropped it in the hall and dragged it into his apartment, grabbed his coat and keys, and we were out in the hall in less than 2 minutes.

The little humorous moment had softened my nerves for sure. Rather than driving we decided to walk to the barcade, which turned into more of a sprint because of how cold it was. When we arrived we were both laughing, and I was a little out of breath and knew I had to be completely red in the face. But as soon as we got inside Edward pulled me back in for another lingering kiss. This time, we were interrupted by Shelly politely clearing her throat. Edward was all smiles as he shook first Shelly's then Vlad's hand, and I quickly followed.

"Alright, let's get this show on the road!" Vlad laughed, once we got the formalities out of the way.

"Do you want to start with a round at the bar, before we head back to play some games?" I asked, not sure if I should direct the question to Shelly or Vlad. She turned and deferred to him, and he shook his head.

"Let's do the opposite. Do you want to play that giant jenga? Or are you pool people?" I realized Edward had never seen me play pool and I had my answer.

"Pool!"

"Oh! Let's do guys vs girls!" Shelly jumped in, winking at me. I wondered if she was hiding some pool secrets of her own. Vlad looked a little irritated, but he nodded.

"Alright. Do you want to break?" Edward directed the question to me and Shelly, but he held the cue out towards me. I took the pool cue he offered me, but shook my head.

"You guys go ahead!" I smiled to him and then winked at Vlad. Edward broke, and from his first hit it looked like Edward was taking it easy on us. I just took it in stride.

"Shelly, you want to go next?" I asked, after Edward went. He sank one striped ball before he missed. He seemed surprised that I didn't go, and he came over to me.

"Hey…you're not nervous, are you?" He seemed so concerned. I knew I ought to make him feel better, but I knew I'd have fun playing with him.

"I'll be fine." I shrugged, trying not to smile too hard. "It's just a game." Shelly sank two balls on her turn, and Vlad didn't sink a single ball. What he did do, was line me up with an easy first shot.

On my turn I sank the shot he set me up for, no problem. With Shelly cheering me on, I sank a second. And then with Shelly getting excited, I sank a third. On my go for the fourth, I hit it just slightly too soft and it stopped a few inches from the hole. Then I walked up to Edward, and kissed his shoulder.

"Edward…you're not nervous, are you?" He laughed out loud, looking between me and the table with a wide grin.

"Oh, it's on Isabella." He sank two more, but missed on the third, but didn't give Shelly many options. She hit it so that Vlad couldn't get a hit. And then with Edward's direction Vlad sank one and put the ball in an awkward spot for me. I managed to get one in but almost scratched, and instead of going after the last ball I hit it way far away from Edward's other options. He got one in with an impressive trick shot that I still think was an accident, then missed. Shelly also missed, mostly due to Vlad 'accidently' knocking a chair over as she took her shot. Then Vlad got one in to tie us up. When it was my turn for a shot, I smiled.

"Good game." I winked at Edward, before easily getting the last ball in. Then I turned to go after the 8 ball. But when I leaned over to knock it in, Edward came up next to me and started trailing a finger up and down my arm.

"What are you doing?"

"Just watching you play." I kind of didn't want to tell him to stop. I wouldn't have thought Edward would play dirty, and I was kind of into it.

"Hold that thought." I said. I made sure to lean a little further to play with him a bit, but I wasn't losing that game. It was a tricky shot, but I did manage to get the 8 ball into the pocket I called, and win the game. The second it went in, before Shelly and I could celebrate, Edward pulled me into another, lingering kiss. Then, leaned in and whispered.

"I wouldn't have thought you being so good at pool would be such a turn on." At first I thought he was teasing me but when I leaned back a bit to look at his face, I realized Edward was serious. And that, was a huge turn on. Unfortunately, we couldn't do anything about it with Shelly and Vlad there. So, I gave him a quick peck and then turned to face our guests who were both unashamedly peering at us.

"Do you know how cute you both are?" Shelly gushed the second we made eye contact. I smiled. For the rest of the night we decided to stop pool and play other games. We played Skee Ball, which apparently is Vlad's thing. We played a shooting game in which Edward absolutely killed the rest of us. We played one of those basketball machines too. After a few rounds of each of the games, we did sit down for a few rounds of drinks to talk. Instead of asking us questions, Vlad mostly just talked to us about normal things.

Halfway through the conversation Edward started rubbing my knee, and his hand kept getting higher and higher. He didn't go anywhere inappropriate but even just the feeling of his fingers darting under the edge of my skirt brought me back to how I felt at the beginning of the night and after we played pool. I couldn't get out of there quickly enough.

When we finally said goodbye to Vlad and Shelly, we once again darted back to Edward's apartment. The second we made it into his room, darting past a bemused looking Masen, it was like the dam erupted. We were a mess of lips, and hands, and moaning. I thought for sure he was going to relent, but he wouldn't. Edward didn't even take his pants off. As I started in on his pants and he stopped me, I couldn't help letting out a frustrated sigh.

Edward stopped, grabbing my hands and sitting us both down on his bed.

"Bella, are you…I'm sorry." He looked so frustrated and I felt so guilty, because I never wanted to make him feel like that. But I was getting frustrated.

"You don't owe me an apology Edward. I just…you're you, and I can't help how much I want you." Edward gave out a frustrated groan at that, and I felt a little bad, but it was true.

"Hey, we should have dinner. We didn't end up eating anything at the bar." I said, to divert.

"Bella be honest, are you mad?"

"No." It was the truth. Maybe once upon a time I would've been mad, or at least frustrated with Edward. But I respected him and I respected his boundaries, even if in the moment sometimes it was disappointing. In being with Edward I got everything that made Edward amazing. With all of that, sleeping with him was really a non-issue.

"Alright." Edward leaned down to kiss my neck, before tossing me my shirt and making his way bare-chested into his kitchen. With a view like that awaiting me, I had nothing to complain about.

Once Vlad got going, he really got going. By the time he'd met with Alice and Jasper, he already had the story more or less formatted out, and had the first several pages done. By the end of that week, he had the first 30 pages. After he had spoken to everyone, it seemed like Vlad did nothing but crank pages out. It made sense, working on the script was his job, but it was still incredible.

Rather than calling, Vlad texted me any questions that came up. I got used to getting texts like:

_When you went for your DNA Test did they do blood or saliva?_

_Did you hug your parents when you met for the first time?_

_Were your friends with you when you got the call? _

_Did Jane ever live with you and Tanya? _

It was always random, and often out of order. I knew I wasn't the only one – Edward got texts as well and even my parents and my friends occasionally. Vlad never sent us any pages of the scripts, even when Alice asked as my agent, but he would update us randomly on the page count.

The biggest surprise was when I found out that Vlad had visited Jane in prison – without asking me. She still refused to see me – I'd tried to visit the day after Thanksgiving only to find out that I wasn't on her list and she wouldn't meet me. I was pissed and hurt, and it took Edward, my friends, and a pint of ice cream to remind me that Jane was an adult and so was he and it wasn't my choice whether he spoke to her or not.

By late December, I was starting to get really curious about the script. Vlad had stopped sending us page updates once he got to 137, which Alice told me meant he was probably making edits. I still wondered if he was going to finish. I knew he was meeting with Shelly regularly and getting her feedback about the script, because she took me and my parents to dinner to talk to us about the next steps of casting and location scouting. She also took copies of a lot of old pictures of all of us – including some that had finally been released to me when the trial was completed – for the wardrobe and hair &amp; makeup people to start putting together their looks, and for the location scouting and design people to get started.

We had other things to worry about, too. We were all getting ready for the holidays in different ways. Jasper was flying to Korea with Alice to visit her parents. Angela was taking Ben home for Christmas too, which was an even bigger deal for the two of them since he hadn't met her parents yet. The Cullens had invited my family to come and spend Christmas altogether – Masen, Lizzie, and Jake included, and I insisted on making the meal which brought an unneeded layer of stress into my life. The script was still in everyone's mind, but it wasn't the only thing.

Still, when 3 copies of the script turned up on the doorstep three days before Christmas, wrapped in a big red bow with the note _Merry Christmas, Bella_ tucked in on a little card, it made my day.

Later, Vlad texted me to enjoy my reading, that he was on vacation until the 10th, and to be ready to tell him everything I needed changed the second he got back.


	37. Chapter 36

**A/N: I'm a day late - I hope I didn't scare anyone! I was at a conference and I thought I'd have time to get on my computer when I got home but I fell asleep instead! I just realized I didn't post it, so here you go. Sorry it's late. Thanks for all of your kind reviews guys. Heads up - another Author's Note at the end. **

**I don't know this story or these words, just my plot.**

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"Bella, really, it's alright." Angela set down her margarita and rolled her eyes at my frown, which did nothing to make me feel better. Alice had disappeared to the kitchen the moment the topic was brought up, and Nessie was awkwardly stirring her own margarita with her straw.

"Angela, I feel really bad."

"Okay, Bella did you ask him to take me out of the script?"

"No! Of course not! I wouldn't –"

" – then you have nothing to worry about!" I frowned into my drink.

"Angela, you were there for all of this just as much as Alice was. You deserve to be in the movie too. I don't know what I would have done if I didn't have you as a friend."

"Bella, I get why they did it. They don't have a huge budget to make this movie, we knew that going in. Does it really matter whether you have one best friend or two? That's one less person they have to hire."

"It matters to me."

"Okay, how about this. How about they make Alice coole – um – more sarcastic, and into video games. Then it'll be like this Alice is the both of us. Maybe you can call her A the entire time, and then you'll never have to know who she is at all." Angela laughed, but I glanced towards Nessie.

"It's not the worst idea…" Nessie looked back towards me, and I nodded.

"I don't know if he'll go for calling her A, but I definitely think that he can make Alice in the movie more like you. He sat down with both of you, he knows your personalities, it shouldn't be too hard."

"Alice, what do you think?"

"Whatever Angela wants!" Alice called back in response to Nessie's question – proving she had been listening in.

"Fine. Cool. Alice/Angela hybrid it is. Now that that's straightened out Bella, will you please tell us what you actually thought? I thought we came here to get drunk and talk about the script. And when are Edward and Masen getting back?"

"Actually, Edward and Mase let us have the apartment for the night in case we get too drunk and people want to get rides back. Way cheaper than commuting from his parents' place. I think they're having a family dinner with his parents."

"That was so nice!" "Without you?" Nessie and Angela spoke at the same time, and then the 2 of us stared at Angela's weird comment.

"What? Bella you've been living with his parents for months now. You've got to admit, you're practically family. I think Esme's been sizing you for wedding dresses in your sleep."

"Ha, ha, Angela. And yeah Ness, that's what I said, but Edward said that since he knows what happens when we all get drunk he'd feel better if we were here."

"Too soon!" Alice called from the kitchen, making us all burst out in laughter. But then I thought about it. In a weird way, I was surprised that I didn't think it was too soon. If he'd made that joke even a month or two earlier there would have been some awkwardness and discomfort. But when he'd said it, I'd laughed.

"Oh no, you're overthinking something." Nessie groaned, breaking me out of my thoughts.

"What?" Alice finally came out of the kitchen with a tray of little baked pigs in a blanket that I didn't remember her bringing in or unwrapping.

"That's the face Dad makes when he's overthinking. Bella's overthinking something."

"No I'm not!" It was a reflex, and when I realized how childish I sounded I felt my face get warm. I cleared my throat to change the subject.

"Speaking of, Nessie did Mom tell you what she wants to change? The one thing she focused on within the whole entire script?"

"No but I'm guessing it'll be weird. Did she want them to specify that her hair was 'sooooo long' when you were kidnapped? She literally always complains about how cutting it off to get a bob when I was seven was a mistake." Alice giggled at that, and I fought not to laugh too.

"No. I mean now we have to get that added to the script, but no. There's one line in the script where she says she hates my…she hates Tanya, and Mom wants it gone. She says she'd never say that. And she wouldn't. But she called Vlad on his vacation to tell him to take it out."

"Sounds like Mom."

"Are we good now?" Angela cut in, eyebrow raised. I shrugged.

"I am if you are." I smiled. Alice clapped.

"Great! Let's talk about something else!"

Two days later, I sat down to have the last conversation I was going to have about the script. Right after I got it, I'd bought myself a bottle of wine and I'd read it by myself. It was very different from reading a script for a play, which I hadn't expected, and it took a while to get used to the format. But one I had, I got really into it. Obviously, it wasn't word for word but all of the moments were there – all of the crazy things that had happened to me over the past couple of months. The first time I read it, I really got a feel for how well Vlad's vision supported Shelly's.

The second time I read it, I started flagging the things that I wanted to change and the people I wanted to talk to. Right away I'd flagged the Angela/Alice issue, and a scene that Vlad had written where Jane and I got into an argument. Then, I flagged the order of certain events. Vlad had left Sam out of the script entirely which was a big deal for me because I didn't want anyone to doubt that Edward had done the right thing. I wanted to flag all of the romantic scenes but I knew that realistically the movie that most people would want to see did include my relationship with Edward. As much as I wanted the heartfelt meeting of my parents the way that Vlad wrote it, I flagged that too to be more true to what actually happened. The only thing I couldn't bring myself to flag was the ending. That now-iconic ending of me telling Edward that I finally felt free was so romantic, so comforting, that I couldn't bear to change it. Besides, even though I'd never had that one moment with Edward or my parents or even Kate, I had slowly been getting better. I thought that was worth celebrating.

I gave it one week, waiting until Christmas had passed before I started calling people to talk to them about the script. I started with mom and dad, calling them as soon as I got back from work. Dad was just fine with just about everything. If anything, he thought he had too many lines, but Mom wouldn't let him cut them. Mom had a few more suggestions, and I had to fight not to laugh when she told me about calling Vlad. There were a few things that we agreed to change, especially the scene where we met. I had been uncomfortable bringing it up, and I was surprised and relieved that they agreed that the way it was written was too gushy and too far from how it really was. Getting off the phone with them made me feel better about talking to my girls and my sister.

It was Alice's idea to have us all meet in person. And, once the Angela issue was settled, it ended up being a fun night. To my surprise, Nessie was the most vocal about places where she felt that there were opportunities to bring a little of Angela's personality out in Alice's character. Other than that, nobody really disagreed with any of the changes I brought up. Even Alice was less opinionated than I expected her to be.

Still, it didn't stop me from being nervous to meet with Edward. Even though we'd both done our best to brush off that moment in his apartment and move forward, some awkwardness had settled in to our relationship in the weeks after our date night. We had gone back to our usual interactions of him coming to visit me and also visit his parents and also hang out with Masen. It wasn't intentional on either of our parts, but we hadn't really spent any time alone. So I asked to have the conversation at his place, and I asked him if we could be alone.

Even though I knew I had nothing to worry about, I was once again nervous when I knocked on his door. He looked just as nervous when he opened it, eyebrows furrowed, like he was inches away from pinching his nose.

"Come in." He said, stepping aside for me to walk past him. He wouldn't meet my eyes, and that made me more uncomfortable than anything else. I wanted to ask him what was going on, but I couldn't think of what to say, so I just stepped in and hugged him. I looked up at him but when he didn't lean down I leaned up and kissed his jaw. When he finally looked at me I kissed him, grabbing his face and leaning into it. It took him a second to kiss me back, but right before he did I felt his shoulders relax from tension I didn't even realize he'd had. I was the first to step back, and he broke the kiss but didn't let me go.

"I've missed you." I said, resting my head on his chest. He sighed in a long, heavy release, kissing my head.

"I thought you were coming here to break up with me." He said it all so fast I almost wasn't sure I heard him right. Then I forced my way out of his arms to look at him.

"What?" He looked apologetic, but he looked away from me as he answered.

"It's been almost a month since we really spoke. Even on Christmas, we didn't really do anything just the two of us. And then you said that you wanted to talk and we needed to be alone…" he trailed off. I was floored.

"Do you…want to break up?" I hated to ask, but I had to know.

"Of course not!" He sounded horrified at the thought, and my lungs unclenched in relief.

"I'm sorry I made you feel like that. And I'm sorry I was vague when I texted you. I think I just kind of…assumed that you would know I was talking about the script." I smiled apologetically.

"I still can't read your mind, Bella Swan." He teased, so much lighter than before.

"Why did you think I wanted to break up with you? Why wouldn't you talk to me about it before now? I know I haven't been great recently but I didn't think it was bothering you that badly. I'm sorry."

"It's not just that." Edward scrubbed a hand over his face, and then started towards the couches. I followed him, sitting on the other side of the couch so I could turn and look at him.

"When the trial was going on, and right after, you placed a lot of trust and faith in me. You needed me, even before we started dating. It would be really normal for you to get through all of this and decide that you didn't need me anymore and wanted to put this relationship behind you with the case. And then that night…Bella I know you brushed it off for my benefit and I appreciate that but part of me felt like now without the case to distract you maybe you started to decide that I wasn't worth waiting for."

I wanted to be offended. I was, deep down. But I could see how much it took for Edward to admit that to me. Regardless of how I felt, I knew that I hadn't been close with him and his feelings were a direct response to my actions. Instead of asking how he could possibly think that about me, I scooted over to him on the couch, and kissed his forehead. I settled down until we were eye to eye, and I grabbed his shoulders.

"Edward you're right, I did need you. But you're making it sound like any random guy could have filled that spot, and that's not true. I needed you. Exactly how you are, exactly who you are, all the things that make you so perfect for me. I'm not going to stop needing you just because the trial is over. To be honest, I don't know if I'm ever going to stop needing you."

"Bella" he stared me back in the eyes looking so relieved and so happy, "Bella, I" then he was kissing me again. Slowly and calmly like we had all the time in the world, which I guess he finally believed we did.

This is selfish of me but before that moment it had never occurred to me that I could truly hurt Edward. If I had acted the same way with any other past boyfriend including Mike, who I'd thought I would marry at one point, I don't think he would have been so hurt or so vulnerable. But letting it sink in that our relationship was truly a two-way street, I realized that I would have to do better.

"Edward, if I make you feel like that again can you tell me, please? I want to know."

"You have a lot going on."

"Yeah, most importantly my relationship with you. I've been distant, and that sucks and it was really selfish. If I do something like that, I need you to call me out. You know by now that I'll do the same for you." He cracked a smile at that.

"Okay, so now, about the script."

It turns out Edward had a lot of changes that he wanted, but most of them were police protocol that was wrong. He agreed with me about Sam, and he thought the ending seemed more cheesy than romantic but he didn't put up a fuss since I liked it. When he asked me how I felt about the story overall I said that it was definitely what I wanted. The script almost made everything feel like a fairytale – far from the nightmare it actually was at some points – and I thought it was a great blend between telling my story and telling a story people would pay money to see.

On New Year's Eve, instead of going to the party that Alice was throwing downtown, Edward and I rang in the New Year in his apartment by ourselves. I celebrated with Edward, champagne, and finally getting to third base. A week later, Alice compiled everyone's complaints and requests and demands on one version of the script and sent it to Vlad.

When he got back, I thought it would take him another month to get through the changes. It barely took him 2 weeks. By mid-January we all had a new copy to read. It wasn't 100% what I wanted, I still thought he should just add in Angela and that some of the scenes were way more romantic or sweet than they were in real life, but I signed off on it. So did everyone else. By the end of the month, the script was officially approved.

The first foreign concept that I had to contend with was the press releases. As soon as all of us signed off on the script, Shelly's studio put out a press release that stated that the script was approved and casting was set to begin in the Pacific Northwest. We all knew that for the smaller, lower-budget film local talent would be our best bet. I didn't expect the frenzy that happened at the announcement.

Within 48 Hours Alice forwarded me links to a few social media accounts and an entire website dedicated to giving "fans" of mine and Edward's "love story" the insider scoop about casting for the film. The craziest part was that none of them were official studio accounts – they were all run by actual people. I almost followed one too, until Alice told me that it was the fastest way to have a bunch of obsessive people trying to meet me in real life.

It all got even stranger when Shelly invited Edward and I to be part of casting alongside Alice. I hadn't even known that Alice planned on being involved, and I definitely hadn't. I wanted to say no but both Shelly and Alice told me that it would be very helpful for the casting director to get my opinions on actors – everything from their look to their acting – to be as authentic as possible. I knew that I'd asked that of Shelly, I liked her true-to-life vision. So I said yes right away.

It turns out, when you're starting a cast you typically start with your stars. But our casting director Heidi wasn't getting any submissions for me or for Edward that she felt were acceptable, so she decided to move forward with the people she felt were good candidates.

Even though she was only in 3 scenes, they took the casting of my boss very seriously. The first weekend in February Heidi had me come in and look at 3 videos of women reading lines for Mary. Instead of telling me to pick one, they asked me what I liked and disliked about each. One of the women was too curt, and another was too pitying, but the women they showed me first I felt was a pretty good representation. Except for her braids she didn't look that much like Mary, the third woman looked the most like her. But, she captured something about the firm kindness and sympathy that Mary showed everyone on her floor.

Two days later, she was the first casting announcement leaked on the fan website – before any of us were even officially informed. Mary even called me into her office to ask if it was true. I thought she might be upset about the casting, but she laughed and told me that she just hadn't realized she was going to make it into the movie!

One that I took a lot more seriously was the casting of the girl to play my sister. They hadn't expected to cast Nessie before they cast me. Heidi said that ideally, she would have liked to cast me first and then cast Nessie based on how much the actresses looked related, among other things. But, she had 2 girls that she really loved very early on and she didn't want to risk losing the right girl to another project.

Heidi had the girls auditioning meet Nessie first. Each of them spent a day with her in school, which caused somewhat of a stir, and then went to dinner with her and mom and dad. I wanted to go, but Heidi wanted Alice and I to have fresh eyes when they read for us. Live. Rather than shooting video, they wanted us to see them in person.

Both girls were fantastic. I could tell how much it meant to them to get this role, because both of them were embodying Nessie right down to their mannerisms. They each did 3 scenes with Heidi reading for me. Looking at their resumes, I learned that even though this was a little indie film, both girls had come up from Los Angeles to audition. After the first two scenes, I felt useless. Alice had a lot of comments and she and Heidi were having in-depth conversations but all I could contribute was that I was blown away.

The real difference for me was in their readings for the last scene. It was the scene where Nessie tells me stories about mom and dad. It was really supposed to be a filler scene interrupted by Jake telling us that we looked like sisters, a light moment before the drama with me and mom and dad deciding if we would take the stand. The first actress I thought completely captured Nessie. Even with Heidi reading the lines almost monotone back to her, it was funny and cute and charming. But the second actress took the scene in a completely different direction. She made it feel so intimate, like she and Heidi were really connecting. She captured Nessie, but she also made the moment feel tender and important instead of funny. By the time Heidi stopped her and sent her away, I realized I was almost in tears.

Alice took one look at my face the second the door closed and turned to Heidi.

"If you don't hire that girl, I don't think Bella will ever forgive you." She smiled. Heidi nodded.

"That was something. If she can deliver like that on camera in the film, that girl has a long career ahead of her."

Three days later it was not only on the fan sites, it was on gossip sites too. Young, unknown actress Bree Tanner cast to play Vanessa Swan in upcoming child kidnap case film. When that announcement came out, Nessie was actually followed to her dorm by an earnest paparazzi before the school had him hauled off by the police as a warning. That same night Shelly reached out to my family, Edward's family, and all of our friends telling us all to prepare ourselves for the incoming press presence as the movie announcements continued to come out.

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**A/N Part 2: Alright, I have a few ideas for what fic I want to do next when I'm done with Swansong. Hopefully you guys would want to read something else that I write. Right now I'm kind of attached to a Seth story with an emotionally delicate AU, a story where modern Europe is still ruled by King and Queens and Princess Isabella is vying for future king Edward's heart, and a pretty twisted and dark vampire AU with a Darkward and a very naive Bella. Let me know in the review if any of these sound interesting to you - they're all probably very different from this one! **


	38. Chapter 37

**A/N: Guys I am so sorry, I had no idea that this didn't post! I swear I clicked the button to post it last week. Guess you're getting 2 chapters this weekend! Thank you for your patience, and for your reviews! I'm still trying to decide what I want to work on as my next project if people have any preferences. **

**I don't own this world or these characters, just my plot. **

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By Valentine's Day the press had started to pick up enough that Edward and I didn't want to risk being hounded somewhere high key. So instead of going somewhere fancy we made a night out of doing the un-fanciest things we could think of. We went grocery shopping together, walked to a random little Mexican place for dinner, and then went back to his apartment to make dessert. An hour later we were eating a bunch of little raspberry tarts and watching some sappy movie on TV, and he surprised me with a beautiful necklace. Much later, before we went to sleep, Edward apologized to me for not being able to take me out. But he didn't need to worry, that evening spent with Edward was oddly one of the most romantic Valentine's Days I'd ever had.

That was a Wednesday, and by Friday afternoon I was still reeling in the glow of the perfect night. I had gone into work early so that I could leave early, because Heidi had told Edward and I both that she had important news to give us. Around 3 I drove myself over to the place they'd rented for the auditions, and walked in. Edward was already in the room, shaking some man's hand and talking to him next to a beaming Alice and Heidi. I was about to ask what all the fuss was about when Edward shifted and I saw the man properly. I stopped dead in my tracks. It wasn't just some man. There, standing right there, was Emmett McCarty.

Obviously, Emmett has been a well-known actor for several years since that drama about his wife plotting his murder. But this was right after he was nominated for an Oscar for that bear movie. His name was everywhere, and he was standing right in front of me. Alice noticed me first, whirling around and smiling impossibly wider.

"Bella, come meet Emmett. He really wants to meet you!" At the sound of my name Emmett looked up, locked eyes with me, and stepped around Edward arm extended.

"Isabella Swan, I am so happy to meet you." I nodded, and took his hand carefully. When nobody said anything, I took a stab at talking.

"It's very nice to meet you, um, why are you here?" Emmett laughed, but I was dead serious. He nodded back towards where Edward stood behind him, looking at me and fighting back a smile.

"I'm here to audition to be your Edward, if you'll all have me." I heard him, but I honestly couldn't process what he was saying. I knew that celebrities did movies, that was the point, but it had never occurred to me that there would be celebrities in the movie about my life.

"Why?" As soon as I said it, Alice gave a frustrated groan.

"Told you it was a reasonable question." Edward did smile then, walking up to me and slipping an arm around my waist. "That's my girl."

To his credit, Emmett was handling all of this like we were all behaving rationally.

"We don't need to know why. Obviously, you have an audition, Emmett." Heidi cut in, smiling, her professional game face in place. But I shook my head.

"No, I need to know why. I need to know how, even. How did you even know about the casting? I don't think we can afford you." At that Heidi made a strangled noise, but Emmett laughed again. I was glad he was amused, I was being very rude and it's like my mouth wouldn't stop.

"You're different than I imagined, to be honest. Spunky. It's cool. This is going to sound weird considering the situation we're in, but I've wanted to meet you for a while now. I know a lot of people probably do, but I'm just in a situation to make it happen. When I saw the news about the movie I told my agent to find the project and that if I could book it I'd do it – and for whatever you're willing to pay." He directed the last part towards Heidi, whose immediate smile looked incredibly relieved. I had a feeling I'd be out of her good books for a while.

"But why?" Emmett sighed.

"Not a lot of people know this, and I'd appreciate some discretion on everyone's part, but I was a closed adoption. When I was two years old my birth mother contacted the state and told them that she needed me taken away, and didn't want anyone to know who she was. Apparently, we both showed signs of abuse. I didn't remember and I didn't know that I was adopted until I was seven. We ran into her in a random area of the city and she recognized me and she broke down crying. She told my parents that my dad had threatened to kill me when she gave me up, and that not having a kid was the reason she'd escaped. My parents offered to let her stay in touch with me, and she seemed excited about it, and I was so confused. And that's the last time I ever saw her. We have no idea what happened. I know it's not the same thing at all Bella, not even close, but…" I stopped him, laying a hand on his arm.

"I get it." I did. Granted I wasn't adopted, but I knew firsthand how shocking it was to find out so unexpectedly that your parents weren't your parents. And I felt for him losing his birth mother, and never having that closure. Somewhere out there his mother had to have seen that he was famous and accessible and still hadn't reached out.

"Emmett, I'm sure everyone in here would love to see you audition." He beamed, as if that wasn't already a foregone conclusion, as if he didn't know that he was obviously going to be the most talented person to audition by far. That moment right then is when I knew that I would like Emmett McCarty.

To my surprise, Heidi was very nonbiased about casting. Including Emmett, she had 4 finalists for Edward. Instead of shadowing Edward for a full day, with special permission from the station each of them could shadow him for an hour – and he tried to give them a little tour of all the rooms that things had happened in. They also each got dinner with him and I, which I didn't love because it was 4 days of people crashing our dates. Emmett's was the funniest because we had to pre-warn the restaurant, get shepherded to the very back, and he sat with a baseball hat on and back to the rest of the patrons the entire time. He said we were lucky that nobody knew he was in Seattle, otherwise we'd have had to eat with him in his hotel room.

To my surprise, Emmett was more down-to-earth than some of the other guys auditioning. Nobody except our small casting group and Shelly knew that Emmett was auditioning, including the other guys auditioning. One of the guys had been so proud of his 3 previous roles in made-for-TV movies – I could tell he thought Edward and I should be impressed. One of them kept asking Edward questions – so much so that Edward asked if he was a reporter. The other guy was normal but seemed a bit nervous, and Emmet's cool confidence blew them all out of the water.

This was true for his readings as well. Instead of having them alternate, each guy read 3 scenes one by one. It was a lot to sit through, but Heidi played it smart saving Emmett for last. As could be expected, he was easily better than everyone else. He didn't necessarily become Edward, but he gave the lines personality and depth and made them interesting.

To my surprise, Heidi did a second callback for Emmett and the made-for-TV guy. She privately confided in us that Shelly was worried about working with someone from Hollywood because she didn't have the time nor the patience to deal with a Hollywood ego. This time the guys were doing one scene, the scene where Edward talked me out of my room. It was strange, to see Heidi and both actors recreate such an intimate moment.

This time Emmett went first, and it made me understand how truly professional he could be. He was a different person. Heidi stopped him twice to tell him to take the scene in a different direction and both times he really understood what she was saying and accepted direction very well. The second guy was good, better than I wanted to give him credit for, but he didn't deliver what Emmett did. Heidi let them both go with a "we'll let you know" but there was no discussion. We were all aligned.

A few days later she was warning us all to brace ourselves. The very next day, the official announcement went out that Emmett McCarty had signed on to the unnamed kidnapping movie. The fan sites went crazy. The studio webpage for the film crashed. It was on the actual news, not just in Seattle but across the country. That completely changed the trajectory of the film.

Suddenly, Heidi had submissions from several well-known actors and actresses wanting to be in the film. Despite knowing nothing about it, Emmett's name gave the project clout. I was worried at first that she might re-cast the entire film, but that was the first thing Heidi promised to us and to the actors that had already been cast. Bree, who was making plans to move to Seattle for filming, was suddenly being talked about as an "unknown star" in the project.

I was starting to spend more and more nights in the city with Edward at his apartment, although most of my belongings were still at his parent's house. Whenever I did go to make lunch or dinner, Esme and I would chat about the progress with her decorating business or my progress at work. She really enjoyed hearing the stories about how crazy my coworkers were getting.

My first workday after the Emmett announcement went out, 7 women in my floor came up to me in a herd to ask if I'd met Emmett McCarty. I really thought about lying. They were all leaning over the edge of my cubicle. Kristie, sitting across from me, was trying her hardest to pretend she wasn't listening in too. Instead I said,

"Um, yeah. Edward and I met him."

"Was he just as hot in real life?" "Did you scream?" "Was Edward worried?"

"I really need to finish this file…"

"Alright! Talk to you at lunch!" There was no winning.

Sure enough, when I said I was thinking about going out for lunch I suddenly ended up in a café with a table for twelve. I was grilled about Emmett, about the movie, and about if I'd met any other celebrities. I was honestly very relieved to be able to say no, I'd only met Emmett. When the waiter brought the bill, I was the first to throw down cash and get back to work.

That day when I got back to the Cullen's home, Emmett was on some gossip channel. He was telling a perky reporter that he felt very connected to my story as the case played out, and he knew from the beginning that this would be a passion project for him if he was fortunate enough to get the role. He said that after meeting Edward and understanding our dynamic better he was honored to bring Edward to life on camera. He also said that after meeting me he was even more excited to work in this film, and a lot of other nice things about me that I hadn't expected. I really considered taking a sick day from work for the following day.

To my surprise, Emmett didn't go into the details of his past – nor did the reporter ask him why he felt connected to my story. As she asked him if he had any idea who his leading lady would be – and a bunch of other questions he didn't have answers to – I got a phone call from Nessie.

At first, all I heard was screaming.

"Ness, are you alright?"

"Bella! Oh my God!"

"Vanessa?" There was more screaming, and I deciphered that there was more than once voice. Definitely Liz.

"Nessie, will you at least tell me if you're okay? Is that good screaming? Are you drunk? It's 6 PM."

"Bella, I got a job!" She screamed into the phone, and then more screaming.

"What?"

"Okay, hold on, sorry..." She was out of breath. After a minute, the screaming in the background died down.

"Bella, I got a job!"

"Oh, oh! Oh my gosh, Ness that's amazing! Where? Where's your job? Wow! I'm so proud of you!"

"I know! I didn't say anything because I didn't want you or mom or dad to worry but I applied with this PR firm in the city 2 months ago, and they interviewed me on campus last month before break but I didn't hear anything from them over break and now they've called me to say I have a job!"

"I'm so proud of you Vanessa!"

"You sound like mom. Oh! I have to call her! And dad! Bella, can you believe it? I am so excited!"

It went on like that for a while. Then Liz got on the phone to tell me how much my sister was underplaying it – how this firm typically only hired 3 or 4 college grads and Nessie was one of them. I was really happy, and really proud of my sister. It was weird how deep my pride went. I felt like I was more invested in her happiness than I would have been if it was me. Than I remembered being when I got my job. Underneath everything, I was touched that I was the first person in our family that she'd thought to call.

Three days after that phone call, Heidi called me.

"Hello, Bella, do you have a moment?"

"Uh, yeah is everything alright?"

"Yes. This is just a courtesy call to tell you that we're beginning casting you."

"Oh! Umm…" I didn't know how I was supposed to respond.

"I know, it's really late into the process. But I finally feel like I have a good pool of talent to pick a lead. Emmett really upped the quality of the women submitting themselves. I think you're going to be surprised who's turned up."

"Who?"

"Oh, I can't tell you just yet. I don't want you to be disappointed if an actress you like backs out because we can't afford her. But I have a good feeling about this."

"Where do I fit into this?"

"Well, we have over 50 women who passed a pre-screen and are being considered for this role. Obviously, I'm going to take my time with this. I'm also looking at potential casting for Alice and for your parents and your kidnappers and I need to have some of the players ironed out to see how they interact with each other. Bree is sort of my benchmark right now – at least for you and your parents."

I didn't know how to respond. The number 50 was mind-boggling. 50 candidates.

"Am I going to have 50 people shadow me?"

"Oh, no not at all! Bella, it's always like this. We start with an open call and I see what people can do. Then we invite people back to read for us again, and that's the list of 50. I probably won't have any of them even meet you until I get to roughly a top 5. That's a waste of everyone's time. No, it really is just a courtesy call to let you know what's going on, and also a warning."

"A warning?"

"So far I've been able to keep the list under wraps by having everyone submit video auditions. But Bella, once some of these actresses fly up to see us in Seattle there won't be a good way to keep this all quiet. People are going to be talking, and they're probably going to try to hunt you down to see if you know anything."

"Oh."

"And, a lot of these actresses – especially the girls who aren't famous yet but want to be – will probably hunt you down as well to try and get time with you to act you better."

I held back a groan.

"I know it's not ideal for you, but that's show business. I've been doing this for a while but it's really a good break for Shelly and for every unknown actor that gets cast in this film. Bella, people like Emmett McCarty and some of the girls on my shortlist get nominated for Oscars. This is huge."

I had no words. I hadn't considered how big this might be in their lives. I nodded, before I remembered that Heidi couldn't see me.

"That's exciting!" I tried to sound convincing. "I know it's going to be rough with the press, but I've dealt with it. I'm glad this project is going so well. I'm glad it's going to help more than just me."

That was the truth that I could live with. Working on the film was a way for me to get clarity and get my happy ending. I liked the idea that it could be a happy ending for the other people putting their time and energy into it too.


	39. Chapter 38

**A/N: I bet you guys thought I forgot about the extra update this weekend but I didn't! Sorry I haven't gotten to reviews yet, I promise I will tomorrow, but here's your chapter that was actually supposed to be posted this week! A lot of you had some really good insights about who would be cast as Bella ;) **

**I don't own this world or these characters, only my plot.**

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It was rough with the press.

At first, it was just having my name talked about a lot on entertainment/celebrity gossip shows and websites. Alice had a lot of fun forwarding me links to the different articles. One of them was titled "Watch Out Edward Cullen" and was all about how Emmett was falling for me and trying to edge Edward out. After my response to that one, she stopped forwarding them to me completely.

Edward handled everything much better than I did. The situation with random women coming by the SPD was happening again, and it was really irritating him. He had Masen and Sam screening people full-time – he wouldn't meet with any potential cases unless one of them already approved it. But, he was getting more business, which was amazing. He and Masen were still hunting down leads for a missing little boy who'd been kidnapped, but he'd mostly handed it over to Masen, and he was speaking to a few parents – including a single mother who thought her ex-husband might be hiding their daughter from her.

In the meantime, Heidi was still working diligently with casting. She'd cast some more minor roles – people I worked with and extras – but the bulk of her time was spent trying to cast some of the leads. Because she was worried about giving some actresses an edge over others, all of us were temporarily barred from coming to auditions. Even though almost everything was happening via video, we were still not allowed.

Even though I didn't know anything, I still got harassed by the occasional reporter or paparazzi. I'd gotten used to it – knowing my safe places. They still didn't know where I was staying by some miracle, so when Edward and I needed a break we'd hide out with Carlisle and Esme.

One day in early March, Alice forwarded me an email full of links. I almost didn't open them, not wanting to know what was written about me now. But Kristie saw me hesitating and clicked one. To my surprise, the links weren't about me at all, they were all about the actresses that were supposedly flying up to Seattle to audition to be me.

"Oh my God!" Kristie literally screamed, attracting the stares of half of our floor. I blinked. The first name on the list was Lauren Mallory. The Lauren Mallory that had just filmed that musical that everyone was obsessed with. Within 30 seconds I had a crowd gathered around my desk.

"Is that Rosalie Hale?" "No way! Jessica Stanley?" "Carmen Alistair? She's so old!" "I love Gianna Moon that ghost movie was so creepy!" "Chelsea Marcus can not play you, Bella."

I wasn't even holding the mouse anymore, Kristie had wheeled her chair over and taken over. She clicked through link after link. There were so many lists of names. All of them were incredibly famous people – A-List actresses.

"Bella, you get to meet all of these people? You have to bring them to work with you." "I have to meet Jessica Stanley." "I've always thought Lauren and I would be best friends." I just read the articles.

There were several names that were supposedly 'not confirmed' including Jessica Stanley and Gianna Moon, but people seemed very sure about Lauren Mallory and Rosalie Hale. People were saying that Chelsea Marcus and Carmen Alistair were way too old to play me, and some people speculated that they might be playing Renee or Jane or Tanya. Then, some theorized that maybe the film was going to try and go into my future and one of them would be playing an older me. I had to bite my tongue at that one, to not tell my coworkers that it wasn't true.

It took almost half an hour for the excitement to die down and for me to get back to work. I was so focused that I missed a call from Alice and had a voicemail I didn't notice until the end of the day.

"Hey Bella! It's time for you to meet you! We have 4 final contenders – I sent you some links so you can prepare yourself – we're going to do the first meet-and-greet with you and Edward this Saturday. Can you ask Mary if they can come to work with you next week? Or if that'll be too crazy at least take 2 days off and give them all a half day? I think someone will murder Heidi if they don't get at least that much time. Call me back!"

I vowed to call her back when I got home, but she called me on the way.

"Hey Bella! Did you get my message?"

"Yeah, I –"

"Great! Okay, so, you on for Saturday?"

"I don't have anything planned."

"Good. Edward's in too. Cool. Be there around 9 AM. We're going to have them all read for you just so you can get an idea of where they're all at. Then they'll meet you and you guys can all talk. Be warned, they're all super competitive. None of them have ever been nominated for a real award and now that Emmett's name is on this people are saying this could be a Golden Globe or Oscars movie, can you believe it?"

"Umm, Alice?"

"I know, I shouldn't jinx it. Oh! Jasper is here by the way, he says not to let me bully you into anything but you're excited, right?"

"Yeah…"

"Don't be like that! This is so much fun! Ok, so they'll hang out with you this weekend, then we're going to figure out when they'll shadow you slash hang out with you next week. Shelly wants to see them all in person, obviously, so then they'll read for her. We'll keep you posted! Talk to you soon Bella!"

"Wait, Alice!"

"Yeah?"

"Who are they?"

"Oh! Wow I can't believe I forgot to tell you! It's Jessica Stanley, Rosalie Hale, Gianna Moon, and Lauren Mallory."

"But…Rosalie and Lauren are…blonde."

"Yeah, it's called hair dye. Or wigs."

"Okay."

"Alright, talk to you soon Bella!"

"Talk to you soon Alice." She hung up before I even said her name. I almost needed a nap after that phone call. The next day at work, I thought it'd be better if I didn't tell anyone the names Alice had told me. They might not have been Oscar nominees, but every single one of those women was incredibly famous. Unless I knew for sure that they'd be shadowing me at work, I didn't even want to risk it.

I did, however, go into Mary's office to ask her if it was okay for them to come. I expected her to say no. I was prepared for her to point out that it would be a logistical nightmare, and that it was short notice, and nobody would get any work done. I wanted her to remember how bad it was when the press tried to hound me at work, and imagine that with 4 legitimate celebrities. Instead, she said that it was no problem. As long as I got my work done, she thought it was no big deal. Even when I brought up that it would be 4 days she thought it would be "fun."

That was an interesting phone call with Alice and Heidi. Alice screamed into the phone in excitement, and Heidi barely stayed on the call long enough to say bye before letting everyone know the arrangements.

Even my mom, who I'd called for support, thought that the whole thing sounded very exciting. She squealed into the phone so loud that Charlie came running. Dad was the only person that seemed to see my side of it, although to be fair he was grumbling on about not understanding the "fuss" everyone was making over these women, not so much about them disrupting my workday.

In the hustle and bustle of everything, I almost forgot about my non-birthday. But on March 16th I got a collect call from the prison. It was Jane. She told me that she still didn't want me to come visit her, and she knew it wasn't my birthday but she had to call to say Happy Birthday anyways. She told me that she loved me multiple times. The call lasted less than 5 minutes, and besides saying hello and goodbye I didn't say a single word. Later, when Angela asked me if I felt weird about the day I told her that I'd forgotten about it entirely.

The following Saturday, Edward picked me up from his parent's house and we drove over together. 9 on the dot we were in our seats and the first actress came in. Jessica Stanley. All of them were reading the scene where Edward coaxed me out of my room, with Emmett. None of them had read with him yet.

It was interesting to see such a sad moment of my life played out right in front of my eyes. I think if they'd been reading with Heidi it wouldn't have felt so emotional. But with Emmett, it felt real.

Watching the scene I thought it looked great, but Heidi commented that their chemistry didn't seem "quite right." Edward didn't say anything, but halfway through the read – right before Heidi stopped them – he grabbed my hand.

Lauren Mallory's read was a lot better. She seemed kind of smug when she walked in, but she completely transformed as me. Her read was even more emotional. And even though I hadn't seen it before, I agreed that her chemistry with Emmett was a lot more visible than Jessica's.

Gianna Moon was understated by contrast. I thought it was almost too understated, but Heidi seemed to really like her performance. Throughout all of it Edward kept his hand clasped in mine under the table. Before Rosalie came in, he asked for a minute and pulled me out of the room.

"Hey, how are you feeling?" He asked, as soon as the door closed, pulling me into his arms.

"I'm alright." I smiled, but it faded as he looked at me.

"Edward, are you alright?"

"Yeah." I hugged him, nestling my head under his chin.

"How are you feeling?" He was quiet for a second, and I thought he wasn't going to respond at first.

"That was a terrible day for me."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I was worried about you. When your roommates called Alice was hysterical. I wasn't sure how bad it was or if you would make it and at the same time I knew how inappropriate it was that I cared so much. It hurt to have you yell at me like that, even though I knew you needed to lash out to break out of your emotional funk."

"I'm still really sorry about that."

"You don't have to be. I'd let you yell at me every day if it meant you wouldn't lock yourself away like that ever again." Edward winked at me, holding back a small smile.

"Hey, you guys, I'm sorry to interrupt but Heidi's ready to bring Rosalie in." Alice peeked her head out at us.

"Alright." Edward answered, draping an arm across my shoulder. We walked back in and got situated just before the door opened.

Rosalie Hale was drop-dead gorgeous, almost other-worldly looking when she walked in. All of the other actresses were stunning, but Rosalie was on another level. Seeing her in person, it was no wonder that she'd been deemed the hottest woman alive. In that moment, I was sure that there was no way she could ever play me.

The fact that her audition was great made the whole situation even more unfair. She sank into the emotion of the scene immediately, and it was like I was watching a whole different person read the scene. Her chemistry with Emmett was also palpable. As far as I knew the two of them had never met, but you would have thought this moment was genuine between the two of them.

After Rosalie's read, one of Heidi's assistants brought all four of the women back into the room to introduce them to me. The four of them immediately came up all smiles, shaking my hand and asking me questions about myself. It felt like a scene in a high school movie where the new girl is surrounded by the popular girls – I had never been around such a concentrated group of beautiful women.

It was a little weird having them all meet Edward, too. I hadn't thought to ask if he felt weird when I met Emmett, but boy did I feel weird having them meet him. Gianna especially went on and on about how heroic he seemed throughout the whole thing and how impressed she was by his degree and his business. Then on the other end of the spectrum Jessica barely said more than 2 words to Edward and used the time everyone else was talking to him to ask me even more questions.

Emmett kind of hovered around Edward too, and he chatted with Edward in every free minute. Lauren stood near him the whole time, and was pretty blatantly checking him out. It's funny now – but at the time if I'd have predicted Emmett getting with anyone, it would have been her. Rosalie was the only one who was kind of aloof. She asked me a few questions, and Edward a few questions, but she didn't even speak to Emmett or anyone else. Mostly she stood back and observed everything.

The first woman to come to work with me was Gianna. We met at the studio so that I could drive her over, and I was shocked that she hadn't brought anything with her to do. She told me that observing me was going to be her sole focus, which was pretty creepy but seemed to be a part of her "method." She was wearing office clothes, and had her hair pulled up in a bun – and then she put on these huge face-obscuring sunglasses. I guessed that it sort of made her less recognizable, but not exactly inconspicuous.

I didn't get a lot of work done that day. She had a lot of questions for me about why I did what I did, and she had earmarked several moments in the script that she asked me about. At lunch, which we ate in the breakroom, she answered my coworkers' questions and took pictures with them – which they had to agree not to post until 1 week later. In the afternoon, she watched me work for an entire hour without saying anything. Then she got up and walked around, asking a few other people questions. I was sure Mary was going to say something but she really didn't seem to mind. Still, I was very happy to drop her off at the studio after work. She leaned across the seat and kissed my cheek like we were best friends when she left.

Next was Rosalie. When I got to the studio she had bright red hair but was otherwise inconspicuously dressed. She told me that since none of the actresses were redheads it would probably be enough for her to get around. She had a stack of scripts with her in a bag, as well as a list of questions for me. We got through 5 out of 20 before we even got to my job.

I got a lot more work done with Rosalie around because I honestly almost forgot she was there. If a different person hadn't come by every 20 minutes to ask if I "needed anything" as an excuse to gawk at her, it might have been like any other day. She had an assistant bring us lunch to share in the breakroom, and just like Gianna she took pictures with my coworkers – with the wig off. Then, we took some time and she asked the rest of her questions. It was weird how normal the whole thing was. I'd honestly expected her to be kind of eccentric like Gianna, but aside from being gorgeous she was just like another coworker. She had someone come pick her up from my workplace so that I could go home, and that was the end of that. It wasn't until I got back that I realized that I knew nothing more about Rosalie than I had at the beginning of the day.

Lauren had the most personality of all of the women. When I picked her up she was dressed up like she was going to an investment bank rather than the business casual dress code everyone else had. She looked like she'd been professionally styled, and was making no effort to disguise who she was. She also brought scripts with her. Throughout the morning she spoke to every person who stopped at the table, answering all of their questions with a smile and offering to take pictures for anyone who stopped by. She didn't exactly stop me from working – but whenever someone came by to talk she would draw me into the conversation. At lunch she had an entire catering spread brought in for our floor. Then, she had an hour meeting with Mary. She didn't ask me a single question about myself, but we had pretty interesting conversations.

That Thursday I woke up ready to go pick up Jessica only to see a voicemail from Heidi. They had decided that Jessica was more suited for a different part, so I didn't have to worry about bringing her to work with me.

It felt like I went backwards from 100 to 0 after those 3 days. Suddenly, I was getting news about the casting the same time the public was. I found out that Tia Gabriel and Athena Grace were flying to Seattle to audition for Alice. Alice and Angela had to go to those casting calls, and that's how I found out that Jessica was also being considered for Alice. Angela liked her the best and called her "sassy", but Alice liked Tia Gabriel. It felt like every day more and more celebrities were being flown in. Victoria James. Irina Laurent. Charlotte Randall. Aro Volturi. Caius Lee.

The first big announcement to truly blindside me was that Irina Laurent was cast as Jane. I was sure that Heidi would have wanted my input in that casting, but I hadn't even met her or any of the other contenders. The next week Victoria James was cast as Tanya. Irina and Victoria did look like they could be related, despite Victoria's crazy red hair, but I had no idea how well they could act.

Alice called me two weeks later to let me know that Heidi had narrowed her choice down to Rosalie Hale and Lauren Mallory. They wanted to know if I had an opinion either way. The only thing I could contribute was laughter at the fact the search for me came down to 2 blondes.

Out of nowhere Charlotte Randall and Aro Volturi were announced as my mom and dad. I was shocked to find out that they'd actually met my parents – they'd gone to dinner at our house in Forks. It was also a big deal because Aro typically only did those mafia movies. People were wondering if he could pull of this type of a project. Alice told me that's why Heidi had chosen him – to attract buzz. She was confident that he would be great.

One Thursday, Heidi called me personally and asked if I wanted to be part of a talk show appearance that the current cast was doing. She told me she'd already asked Edward and he said no. When I said no too, she seemed shocked. I told her that I was uncomfortable about voluntarily doing press. She reminded me that I would for sure have to do at least one press appearance around the movie's release. I told her I would cross that bridge when I came to it.

For a while, no news was coming out. The current cast was all "bonding" on the road doing press and dropping hints about who might play me. Emmett especially had a blast messing with reporters who asked him about it. On one morning talkshow he promised the hostess insider info and then told her that the lead was actually a blonde, causing her to get really excited for a second on live TV before she realized that Rosalie and Lauren were both blondes.

Then, mid-march Angela called me and told me that she'd won, and Jessica Stanley was cast as Alice. Tyler Crowley, a local Seattle actor was cast as Jasper. She said that it was hard to imagine Tyler as a blonde, but he was a really funny person.

On the 29th I got a phone call from Heidi at 5 in the morning.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Bella, I'm sorry to wake you up but I wanted to let you know before we release it to the press. We've cast you. Shelly and I made a decision."

"Huh?"

"Bella, hello? Can you hear me?" At this point my brain started to catch up, and I realized what she'd said.

"Oh! Oh, who is it?"

"Rosalie Hale. We had to argue a lot with her agent to get the price down somewhere more reasonable for our budget but we got her. Rosalie and Emmett are going to be making the announcement later today on television and on the casting blog, but I wanted you to know first. It was just finalized last night."

"Okay." Heidi chuckled at my sleepiness.

"Alright, go back to sleep Bella. In case we don't get to chat again before I leave Seattle, it was great to meet you and I hope this all works out wonderfully."

"Bye Heidi."

"Bye Bella." Just like that, Heidi's job was done and it was time for Shelly to take over. It was time for filming to begin.


	40. Chapter 39

**A/N: Uploading another chapter today because why not? I'm in a good mood, I have a fun workday tomorrow. **

**I do not own this world or these characters, only my plot.**

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The first day of filming was April 1st.

Alice had already assured me that I was welcome on set whenever. Her leave of absence over, she was joining me back in full-time work and asked if I wanted to carpool to set during our lunch breaks. If we always took lunch at noon and took an extended-lunch, we could see about an hour of filming plus whatever might still be going on after we left work and during the weekends.

Meanwhile, Edward's schedule being much more flexible, Emmett requested that he be available by phone to consult during certain scenes. It was interesting, seeing Emmett interact with Edward. At first, I thought I was imagining it, but hearing Edward talk about their interactions Emmett seemed to really admire Edward. He was really concerned with getting Edward "right" in the filming.

Rosalie and Jessica were less open. On set, Jessica complained day 1 about the black wig she wore – refusing to die her actual hair black. It was funny, I would never call her a diva per se but I could tell that working with Shelly was a novel experience for her. Shelly had a very specific vision and would stop scenes immediately once she felt it wasn't going correctly.

Rosalie never complained or questioned anything, but she never seemed enthused either. She was decidedly hard to read. The first time I saw her with her hair dyed my color I nearly lost it – she was almost prettier as a brunette than as a blonde. But even as Emmett texted Edward a question and Jessica adjusted her wig, she didn't say anything. She simply read and re-read the scene. That first day they filmed the first part of the scene where I got the news from Edward. Rosalie didn't say anything to anyone until she stepped on the soundstage. But the second Shelly yelled action, she transformed again.

It was weird – I had lived through that moment but seeing Rosalie interact with Jessica and Emmett was almost like therapy. Shelly stopped the scene several times to try different things or to capture different angles, but I was so into it that I almost missed Alice pulling me away to go back to work. It was fantastic.

In the two weeks that followed I found myself continuously mesmerized. Emmett made a fantastic Edward in his scenes, and though I was hesitant to admit it, Rosalie made a fantastic me. The first weekend Edward and I spent all of Saturday morning watching Rosalie and Emmett go through that first meeting over and over and over again. Shelly would let them do the whole scene to keep up momentum, watch it, then suggest changes and go again. At one point she let us watch on the screen with Rose and Emmett as she pointed out what she wanted to see differently.

Mid-April Edward got a new case of a missing child that took up a lot of his focus. The boy was three, and he'd been picked up from school by a man who he seemed to recognize, who claimed to be his uncle. That was the last time he'd been seen. The mother had one brother who claimed to not know where he was, and the school had confirmed already that he was not the one who'd signed the boy out. The father had 2 brothers but they lived in other states and hadn't seen the boy in years. Edward was putting together a portfolio of possible suspects along with Masen.

On set, it was crazy to see how randomly scenes could be filmed. The 3rd weekend in April, Alice, Angela, and I watched Rosalie on the phone with Victoria. It was interesting to see how they sequenced it. They wanted to have the scenes feel like a genuine dialogue. So first, the 2 of them recorded their lines in a recording studio on set. They filmed Rosalie first, playing Victoria's recorded lines in a tiny microphone hidden by her hair and the phone.

"Hey Mom."

"Yeah, I know, I meant to call you last night when we got back but…"

"Yeah, I'm really hung over but that's not what I have to tell you."

"Promise me you won't be disappointed?" It was interesting, hearing only ½ of the conversation but seeing Rosalie deliver anyways. It brought me back to that moment. She looked tired and guilty, and it felt like I could hear in her voice how much she didn't want to make the call.

"I know mom, I love you too."

"Mom last night someone in my building called the cops on us when we got home, cause we were too loud. We didn't get arrested or anything! But…I don't know, something weird happened with my fingerprints and then…I have to talk to a detective now."

"Mom?"

"Mom I knew you would be mad I'm so sorry I –"

"Are you crying? Mom don't cry. Please don't cry."

"Mom I'm sorry."

"Mom, please don't cry."

"Yeah, I love you too mom. So much. You don't need to cry."

"I know, I love you too."

"Wait, what? Vacation?"

"Mom that's…why didn't you tell me before now? I could try to come with you."

"Okay, if you're sure. Are you sure you're not mad at me?"

"Have fun. I love you too, mom. Can't wait to see you when you get back." As soon as Rosalie hung up the fake phone Shelly yelled cut and had her go again. And again. Eventually the three of us left to get lunch – we didn't eat the catered food because it was for the actors and crew – and when we came back they were setting up for Victoria.

It was irrelevant, but it irked me a bit that when they showed my childhood home they had one kitchen set. I'd moved so much growing up that it felt like a lie to always show Victoria and Irina in the same place no matter how "old" the actress playing me was. But I got that it didn't make sense to have multiple sets for the brief moments depicting that home.

I was all set to watch Victoria, but then I got a text from Edward asking me to get lunch with him. I had just gone with my friends, but I couldn't say no, so I drove over.

I'm glad I did. When I got to the precinct he was waiting outside for me, and he was in the car with his seatbelt on almost before I had fully stopped the car. He gave one long sigh and then said

"Can we just drive?" When I glanced over he had his nose in a death grip. So I pulled out onto the road. It took a few minutes for him to fully relax and turn towards me.

"I feel like I know what the original detective on your case must have felt like. I have never worked a case with so few leads. Whoever this man is, he knew where the school's cameras are because his face is never directly in the camera line. And it's clear that David knew him because he walks right up to him and lets this man pick him up happily."

"How did the school allow that?"

"Yeah, the parents are suing the pre-school. The girl who released him was a new hire, but already a ton of people have pulled their children out of the school. The school is trying to put all of the blame on her, it's a nightmare. And in all of this there are two parents whose three-year-old is just gone."

"What are you doing now?"

"I'm trying to profile people that the parents know met David, and former staff at the school. The reason they have a few new hires is because some staff members quit a few months back after their insurance changed. But the parents also recently brought him to a few events where there were childcare centers and there's just so many leads."

"I'm sorry, I know this has to be really frustrating, Edward. But I one hundred percent believe that if anyone can figure this out it's you. It's that Penn degree." Edward didn't say anything in response, but he reached out and grabbed my hand.

"Can we just get McDonald's? I should really get back, I just needed to get out of there. His mom was bawling in my office, she's cried every time she's come in."

"Yeah, of course." No need to tell him I'd already eaten. We got his McDonald's, and then drove back to the station. Before he got out he leaned across the car and pulled me into a long, slow kiss.

"Thank you, Bella."

After that conversation I ended up going back to the house to process. Once again, I had a new thought to trouble myself with. Of course I'd thought about how troubling and horrible it must have been for my parents to lose me and not know what happened. But now I was dealing with thoughts of how horrifying the initial process must have been. My Dad had offhandedly mentioned that it took almost a year before they officially declared the case unsolvable. Somewhere out there was a man like Edward who had tried for a year to identify any loose ends he could with regards to my disappearance. My mom had probably cried over and over in a detective's office each time she was told that they hadn't found me. I had a long cry just thinking about it.

A few days later, Alice, Angela and I met up to grab lunch, rather than going to set, so that Angela could tell us about a new development at work. Apparently some girl in a different department was telling everyone she'd slept with Ben just before he and Angela got together. The gossip hadn't reached the boss, which meant it hadn't reached Ben, and Angela wasn't sure what to do about it.

"Would you be mad at him if he did sleep with her?"

"I don't know. Not really, I guess. I just don't know why she would bring it up now. I feel like there's some game being played here that I don't know the truth about. So then I want to ask him about it to see if there's more to the story. But I don't want to be petty either. I don't care who he was with before we got together. I love him."

"Yeah, Ang. I would just wait, maybe it'll all go away. If she tries to approach you about it that's when I would say something. To him." I patted her arm, and tried to smile. She was right, the timing did seem weird.

"I think she did. At least, kind of. She hasn't been very discreet about saying this, you know? I'd never talked to her before but now I've overheard her saying it twice."

"Maybe just talk to him about it, then. Worst case scenario he got her pregnant, right? Anything less than that is just a crazy ex?"

"Yeah Alice, I guess. I don't know. I'm probably making a big deal about nothing. You know what my mom told me the other day? She said I'm not used to things going my way with guys so when they are I try to find a problem. It was harsh but…I don't know maybe she's right?"

"I don't know, Ang. All I know is, Ben is so into you right now. Focus on that." Alice smiled. Above our heads, someone in the deli changed the channel on the TV to a talk show. At first, we all ignored it – chatting about other work things. Alice was the first one to tune back in, waving her hand at us to stop talking.

"I mean, they've been dating for 2 years already and he hasn't proposed. Don't you think if Michaela and Troy were going to get engaged he'd have popped the question by now?" As soon as I heard that, I wished I could turn the TV off. I knew exactly where Alice's mind was taking her.

"Come on, let's eat outside." Angela tried, but Alice didn't even hear her. She was staring up at the screen, frowning.

"I don't know, he was divorced. He's had some issues. He's taking it slow this time, getting it right."

"Or, he's biding his time until the right girl comes along because he has reservations."

"Alice, enough!" Angela shocked me by slapping a hand on the table and spooking us both. She gave Alice a hard look and Alice meekly looked away from the TV to the ground, sliding out of her chair. I got up too, and the 3 of us gathered our food and went to the patio. It was warm enough, though we had to put our jackets back on.

"Alice, it's time to put your big girl panties on. You either have to break up with Jasper or you have to commit to the long game. You can't clam up every single time someone mentions marriage." Angela is blunt, but I'd never seen her be so harsh with Alice. Alice's eyes started to get teary, but Angela stared her down. Finally Alice broke.

"I know! I know that Angela! And I love him so, so much that there is no way I could ever break up with him. I know it's silly. He's really, deeply hurt – that's not going to just be fixed overnight. But God, I wish I was enough sometimes. I get so nervous when I hear people say things like 'the right girl can fix a man' because what if that's true. What if, even though I love him so, so much I'm just the wrong girl for Jasper and that's why he still has these issues with marriage?"

"What if you're his only chance of recovering from that and you leave him and he dies alone?" I couldn't contribute to this conversation, even if I'd had something to say. Alice and Ang were clearly having a moment, Angela more fired up about this than I'd ever seen her before.

"Ang that's awful!"

"Well, that's the side you're not considering. Alice, when you and Jasper got together he told you he would never get married. Now, he thinks about it. He talks about it. It's not a taboo for him anymore. You're so focused on the progress that you haven't made just because some other people who don't know him have opinions that have nothing to do with you. If you're going to obsess over hypotheticals then throw that in there too. The way he feels about you, you might be his only chance Alice."

We were all silent for a minute, awkwardly picking at our food. Alice broke the silence with a deep breath.

"I never thought of it quite that way, Ang. You're right." That was the end of that.

The next day I was still thinking about their interaction as I drove home from work when I got a phone call from an odd number. I picked up, sure it was some sort of news source. Rather than ignoring them, I was supposed to refer them to Shelly's studio's publicists for a quote.

"Hello this is Isabella De – Swan." Even though I had officially taken on the Swan's last name, I still stumbled from time to time.

"Hi, hello. This is um, I need to talk to you."

"Sorry, if you're looking for a quote or other information about the upcoming film I need to –"

"No! No I'm looking for you Isabella this is Alec _."

"I'm sorry, I don't know you, do you have a –"

"I used to date that woman. Jane Denali." He said her name with so much disgust, that it took me a second to realize who he was talking about. It took me another second to place the name. This was that Alec, the man who'd broken Jane's heart. By her account, the man who drove her to kidnap me.

"Why are you calling me? How did you get this number?"

"I'm sorry. I don't want to bother you, truly. But I saw her confession – the whole country did – and I just had to speak to you. I had to tell you what happened."

"I already know what happened." I'm not sure what had me so on edge, besides finding it strange that he had my number. But the situation was very uncomfortable and I didn't want to keep the conversation going.

"I know you've heard what she said, and I know you must be confused. I'm sure she's convinced that I broke up with her because of her body, because she couldn't have a child, but it's not just that." I remembered what Jane said, that the second they found out she was barren he ended the relationship. He took a deep breath.

"We just weren't compatible. We wanted different things in life. Maybe I could always sense the crazy in her, I don't know. My wife doesn't even know I'm the man she was talking about." He gave a weak chuckle at that, like I would find it funny.

"Okay." I had no idea why he was telling me this, and it didn't sit right with me. He kept talking.

"And – and obviously she was insane because I was hurt after we broke up too but I didn't break the law. I didn't kidnap a baby! I got my life together. I'm married now, two kids. Meeting my wife opened my eyes to how crazy Jane was." He sounded almost hysterical and I still had no idea why he had called. Why he thought I would care.

The real crazy thing was, by all accounts I should have believed him. Jane was the one who had done a crazy thing. Because of one breakup she had kidnapped a baby almost on a whim, falsified records, broken all kinds of laws. It would make sense for her to have other crazy behaviors. But, I didn't believe him. Not for one minute.

"Why are you telling me all of this? Jane didn't even name you when she confessed."

"I know, but I know about the movie…" and there it was. The real reason for this spontaneous phone call. He felt guilty, and he didn't want himself named in the movie. Suddenly, I was furious. I wanted to yell at him that he was disgusting, but I tried to keep my composure.

"She loved you, you know. And crazy or not, you loved her enough to move states with her and propose to her. Interesting choice if you thought she was insane. But you know what? I wouldn't want to put your name in the mix anyways. This is about my life and my story, you're irrelevant to it." I meant my words to be cutting, but he heaved a sigh of relief.

"Oh thank you so much. I knew – I knew you would understand. And congratulations on being free from the whole situation." I hung up the phone. I didn't need congratulations or anything else from him. I was done.

Alec, if you're reading this, I didn't use your last name as a courtesy to your wife, who doesn't need to know how heartless you really are. I hope your family is as happy as you claim, but if you feel any guilt at all – good. You deserve it.


	41. Chapter 40

**A/N: Okay guys we're in the home stretch of this story, but there's still a few surprises left! Thank you as usual for all of your reviews, and I hope you all liked the surprise extra post this week. Enjoy!**

**I do not own this world or these characters, just my plot.**

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Once filming picked up it felt like everything moved into hyper-drive. Next thing I knew it was May, and Nessie's graduation was right around the corner. Everything seemed to be moving faster and faster in life. Alice and Jasper seemed closer than ever, and I wondered if Angela's tough-love had something to do with it. Ben's dad found out about the rumor before Angela told Ben, causing Ben to lose his mind trying to convince an already-convinced Angela that this girl was just making it up for the attention. The girl couldn't be fired, but she was out of people's good graces once Mr. Cheney decided to let the whole company know how little he appreciated people "slandering" his son with lies in the office.

I was working towards my promotion, and as we hit a busy season I ended up going to set only a few times a week to keep up with the other hard workers in my group. Things had died down a lot in terms of press and my nosy coworkers. Once filming started the press were much more concerned with trying to get pics of the actual celebrities out and about in Seattle. As for my coworkers, once I told them that even I wasn't allowed to take pictures on set or dictate who was allowed on set or not, I only got the occasional questions about Emmett, Jessica, and Rosalie.

Edward was slowly getting more and more stressed out about the case. He was still trying to hone in on suspects. He had brought in a child psychiatrist to theorize about how far back in a 3-year-old's memory they would still recognize and be familiar with someone so that he could triangulate how far back in his parents' acquaintance it made sense to go. He was even asking them if any adult had admired David in public or another strange setting – citing my case as an example. He was working hard. Masen was still working with him – Sam and the other guys on the team working separate cases. He made it a point to schedule time with me, joking that if he didn't he might never snap out of it.

Maybe because everyone was working so hard, I liked the moments that I could make time to be on set. Once I'd gotten used to seeing some of the more difficult moments of my life playing out over and over, being there was more about observing Shelly's process. She really is a great director, in my opinion, because she knows what she wants but lets actors deliver it in ways that fit their method. Emmett is a questioner, so if he was doing a solo scene and she wanted something different from him she let him get all his questions out. Rosalie, I eventually learned, really likes to stay in-the-moment so Shelly would run those takes back to back, only stopping to give Rosalie short sentences about small changes to make.

It was cool to see the cast building their relationships with each other. Mid-April I noticed that whenever they weren't shooting Rosalie spent a good amount of time with Jessica and Bree. Emmett and Tyler usually weren't too far away either, though if Edward was on set Emmett always used his breaks to talk to him. As time passed, those habits became even more ingrained. If any of the girls took lunch while I was there, they always asked me if I wanted something ordered too. The first time Rosalie Hale asked me if I wanted a salad on her it was so surreal I almost thought she was mocking me. But she wasn't. We weren't best friends or anything close but I hit my stride with them.

The older cast was interesting. They were all vets, and most of them had met each other except some less famous cast members like Elizabeth. They all hung out together exchanging stories about different projects and laughing. Aro and Charlotte didn't really spend time together when they weren't playing my mom and dad. But when my parents drove up one weekend the 2 of them picked my parents brains and did their best to make them feel included all day.

The only members of the cast I took issue with were Victoria and Irina. Victoria did a fine job in her few scenes as Tanya, but she made it very clear that she thought Tanya should be a more relevant character in the script. It was irritating sometimes, and I could tell that Shelly was over it but trying not to say anything. Other than that, Victoria was the most secluded of all of the actresses.

My problem with Irina, however, was her acting. Irina is a talented actress. But, every time I saw her in any scene she seemed so crazy intense. If the script called for her to shed a tear, she'd sob. If she was supposed to be indignant, she was huffy and petulant. As Jane, I thought she way over-acted. But nobody else agreed with me.

When I brought it up with Edward, he told me that I was probably a little defensive of Jane's inability to speak up for herself. Then he kissed me like nothing was happening. Alice thought that Jane was pretty intense in real life, and Irina was doing a great job. Shelly loved it. Outvoted, I knew it wasn't a huge deal but it made me cringe. I could see how it was good for dramatic effect, and it wasn't like she was acting Jane making a scene or drawing attention via a tantrum. But I still felt it was sometimes too much.

As May came and we prepared for Nessie's graduation, I drove back up to Forks to see my mom and dad. It was a short visit, just an overnight stay, but it was nice to see them by myself. I'd typically gone up with Edward, and then over her last semester I drove Nessie up too. But that day, I was able to just talk to my parents. I caught them up on filming, on my job, on my friends. Mom and I shared a bottle of wine as we laughed about the most random things. I finally heard Mom's hair story – and she showed me pictures of her holding me as a baby and how her hair went past her waist. We also put together our graduation surprise for Nessie.

She graduated on a beautiful Saturday in May. The business school graduation was very well decorated and brought me back to memories from my own graduation. As she walked across the stage, after an admittedly very long wait, we all stood and screamed until our voices hurt. I was there with Mom and Dad, Jake, Liz, Edward, and Masen. I'd been touched that she would let Liz and I use our tickets to bring the boys, and seeing how loud they cheered for her I knew they were so proud of her too.

When the ceremony was over we treated her to the first surprise – professional graduation photos. First she made her rounds and said her goodbyes to her friends. We'd helped her pack most of her stuff and move it back to Forks, as she was staying with our parents until she could find an apartment. So, instead of heading back to the dorms to pack up her things, we took some of that time for pictures. She took a lot of solo pictures on some of her favorite spots on campus. Then we went to her favorite spot for family photos. She took some with just mom, just dad, mom and dad, and even though it made sense I was touched when she took some with just me. Then we did full family photos, where all got a little sentimental realizing this was the first big occasion that we celebrated as a complete family. She took a couple fun photos with all of us, including the others, and then some sweet ones with Jake.

After making the drive back to Forks, Mom and Dad gave her the second surprise, a week-long cruise with Liz. They weren't quite progressive enough to buy her a vacation with her boyfriend, no matter how much Dad loves Jake. But, because she only had a month before she started work, they wanted her to enjoy it. She and Liz both freaked out, and Liz thanked mom and dad about a thousand times. We had a lovely dinner, complete with champagne to celebrate. Then it was time for the last part of the surprise.

Mom, Dad, Jake, Liz, and I each had a gift to help Nessie decorate her future home. I gave Nessie a gift card to Crate &amp; Barrel because she'd once told me that she loved going in but probably wouldn't be able to afford actual furnishings from there for a long time. Liz gave Nessie a beautiful abstract painting that she could easily use as a focal point to make any room feel more decorated. Jake gave Nessie a hand-carved tabletop set of wooden animals, a wolf and a lioness, which I gathered held private meaning for them when it made her tear up. Dad gave her a home-security kit and a package of self-defense classes which we all laughed about but I could tell he was serious about. Mom gave her a letter, and told her to read it later.

We all stayed in the house that night, us girls in Nessie's room and the boys in the guest room or on the couch. It was a nice break from all of the hectic things going on, but then it was right back to our busy lives.

In the everyday chaos, being on set was usually my chance to relax and just watch. But one Friday Rosalie approached me the second I sat down, smiling wider than I'd seen her smile while not on camera.

"I have a weird favor to ask you."

"What's going on?"

"I made a reservation tonight for dinner and I'd love it if you and Edward would join Emmett and me. We're going to be filming the more romantic scenes soon now that we know each other better, and it would be helpful to observe your relationship dynamic."

I wasn't sure how to respond to that. I appreciated that they wanted to get it right, and I didn't really have plans. But, I knew that it was a madhouse everywhere they went. Most of the actors barely left their hotel when they weren't filming, because of the press presence. Any time they did, the pictures showed up online and in the tabloids.

"Have you reached out to Edward? I know he has a bit of a crazy schedule."

"Emmett did, he said he thought he could make it. Will you come?"

"Yeah, of course. Um, what time? And how fancy is it?"

"Oh, obviously it's on Emmett. And there's not too many super fancy places downtown but it's a newer restaurant – I'm wearing a cocktail dress."

"Great."

"Thank you! Can we pick you up at work? If you want I can send an assistant to your place to get your clothes. Edward said you work late sometimes, and that we shouldn't bring press to where you live."

"Right." It was a good point, I couldn't exactly have Rose and Emmett pick me up at Edward's parents' home when we worked so hard for the press to not know where I lived.

"Great, we'll get you around six. Here, just write down the address and what you want her to pick up, and then I'll send someone out with the key. We'll return it to you when we pick you up."

"Let me just, check with the people I live with."

"Yeah, sure." This eager side of Rosalie was strange. After a quick call with Esme, who confirmed that it was fine, I wrote down detailed instructions for the dress, shoes, and jewelry I wanted and where I thought I left them, and gave it to her. I ended up deciding not to stay but instead heading back to work.

At 3 PM I got paged to let the woman in to deliver my dress, shoes, and jewelry which she delivered in a garment bag that I definitely did not own before. I almost felt bad keeping it folded under my desk, but it was a relief to have my key and to hear that nothing went wrong.

At 5:45 I slipped into the bathroom to change, and then immediately headed down to the lobby with my things to wait for the pickup. It didn't work – some of my coworkers still saw me, but I got away with vaguely saying that I was going out with Edward.

At 6:00 I stepped outside the building to see a sleek-looking black car parked just up the road. Edward stuck his head out, grinning, and waved at me. Seeing him seem genuinely happy, after the stress he'd been having for days, was the first thing that made me excited for that dinner.

When I got in the car it was setup more like the back of a limo, with 2 sets of bench seats facing one another. I slid in next to Edward, across from Emmett.

"Do you want any beer? Or some wine?" Rosalie was grinning, looking more at ease than I'd seen her.

"Do you have Corona?"

"No, but if you like Mexican beers I have Estrella. It's my favorite beer – I had a case sent to me up here." Emmett offered.

"Uh, sure." I'd never heard of that brand but I was willing to try it. As I sipped it, Emmett signaled the driver to pull away and we were off.

Emmett kept the conversation going throughout the drive, asking Edward and I questions about ourselves and our emotions during some of the scenes. Rosalie smiled, but didn't speak much.

When we got to the restaurant, I was surprised by the amount of press outside. I'd been warned, and I thought I knew what to expect, but the press stood on either side of the door, cameras poised. Confused restaurant patrons waved or rolled their eyes as they walked in, but everything picked up when the driver came to open the door.

Emmett stepped out first and helped Rosalie out, amidst crazy camera flashes. Then Edward stepped out and helped me out. Then, we just stood there. It took both Edward and I a minute to realize Emmett and Rose were intentionally pausing for pictures. Then we awkwardly tried to arrange ourselves in a pose and smile at the cameras with them. Eventually, through no discernible cue, Emmett and Rosalie walked up to the door and Edward and I followed them.

As soon as the doors closed behind us we were led, amidst stares, to a large table in the furthest corner. As our waiter left to grab water, Edward said what I'd been thinking.

"What was that, outside?"

"Oh, the press? That's how you get them to leave you alone. Smile for a few minutes. Then they have something to shop around to the tabloids so they won't hound you as much."

"Warning would've been nice." I joked, making sure to smile so they'd know I was kidding. Mostly.

"Sorry! We're just used to people knowing what to do. Anyways, Edward…" As Emmett distracted us all with questions, it occurred to me that this was a free date for Edward and I. Once I made that connection, I was much more relaxed. It turned out, asking Edward and I to be a couple was not-at-all an issue. The four of us talked, the two of us teased and flirted with each other a bit. It felt like a fun group date, even though Emmett and Rosalie were studying us.

Shortly before dinner arrived Emmett excused himself to take a phone call and Edward went to the bathroom. The second the men were both out of earshot, Rosalie slid over next to me in Edward's seat.

"You know, he was rumored to be dating Lauren Mallory at one point, but my agent said he requested me for this role."

She said it so casually, like it was part of a discussion we'd been having.

"Oh? That's good, right? Flattering."

"Yeah..." She trailed off. Then she looked at me.

"If I tell you something, will you promise not to say anything to Edward or Alice or Angela or anyone else working with the movie?" Talking to Rosalie seemed to be nothing but surprising turns in conversation.

"Uh, sure." I said.

"This whole thing was my idea but it wasn't really to see you and Edward's relationship. No offense but a couple is a couple – nobody is going to be judging the movie based on if I look like you when I hold someone's hand."

"Okay…" If anything, her saying no offense made it slightly more offensive – and I wasn't sure why that needed to be private. Rosalie sighed.

"Look, I made it up because I think Emmett is avoiding me and I'm not sure why. At first I thought maybe it was the Lauren thing, but my agent shut that down. It's really hard to have chemistry with someone who doesn't want to talk to you."

"I can imagine."

"And tonight has been so much better, like so much better, but now I have an even bigger issue. I mean it was kind of easy to ignore it when I thought he was avoiding me, but now…"

"Wait, what's wrong now? Did I miss something?"

"I hate clichés. So much. My whole career I've tried to avoid being a big Hollywood cliché. And what's the biggest cliché of all?"

"Uh…"

"Co-stars dating. Co-stars fall in love all the time because they're forced together and everyone thinks it's terribly romantic until they break up 4 months later when they sign on to new projects. I would hate myself if I became one of those." Understanding finally dawned on me, and I had to fight to hold back a smile.

"Wait, your problem is that you like Emmett?" I almost smiled at the end but the glare coming from Rosalie made the smile slide right off my face.

"Don't. Don't say it out loud. I'm not telling you so that you can play Hollywood Matchmaker. I'm telling you so that if I'm having a moment of weakness when the cameras aren't rolling, you can stop it."

"Alright!" I agreed, mostly so that she'd stop glaring at me. Considering the state of their relationship now I feel safe writing this, but I never had any intention to follow through with that promise. If Rosalie and Emmett were going to date, I wasn't going to be the one to stop them.

After that, Rosalie did ask me a few script-related questions before the boys got back to the table – Edward first then Emmett. The rest of the meal was jovial and easy, even though I did spend a lot of it watching Emmett and Rosalie's dynamic. I couldn't tell if he was into her at all, but I could tell that they were a great fit for each other. We all passed on dessert, but we did stay and chat for a while even after Emmett paid the bill. The restaurant owner didn't seem to mind at all, and I'm sure that having Rosalie Hale and Emmett McCarty in his restaurant was a great draw for him.

When we first stood to leave, he asked us if we wouldn't mind posing for a picture. So, the four of us posed – Edward and I somewhat uncomfortably – in the booth as the man took pictures of us on an older-looking digital camera. I thought it was silly, but seeing how happy it made him was kind of amazing.

When we were all ready to leave, Emmett and Rosalie went out of the front and posed for more pictures so that Edward and I could leave inconspicuously from the staff door. A more inconspicuous car was waiting with our things, and I opted to spend the night at Edward's. After that night I felt closer to Rosalie, knowing her feelings. But I also felt closer to Edward. Though we'd had more of our creative dates, it was nice to have a real date. Even though the picture taking wasn't ideal, the rest of the night was.

I woke up the next morning feeling refreshed and excited, but that quickly faded when I saw what woke me up. Edward was standing in the corner of the room, on the phone, still in his pajamas.

"Yeah, I understand. Absolutely, thank you for calling in. Absolutely, we'll be there to see you soon." He hung up, and looked up at the ceiling, before glancing over at me. All the happiness from the night before was gone.

"Hey Bella, sorry if I woke you up. That was the tip line, um, a woman in a grocery store down state saw a little boy matching David's description asking his "uncle" when he could go home. The man was shutting him up. She tried calling the police without alerting him but it took too long for her to explain and he left before they got there. She didn't take a picture. I'm going to call Masen to see if he wants to be the one to head down there."

"Edward are you, alright?"

"I'm just so frustrated! This is the strangest case I've ever worked on. Even how the woman described it, she said the boy didn't look scared, didn't look harmed, called this guy uncle like they knew each other. But every single one of their siblings is accounted for. Their friends. I'm going back and searching records to see who they might've introduced David to and forgotten about but it doesn't make any sense." He paced as he spoke, walking back and forth agitatedly. I had never seen him so visibly upset, not even during my case. I wished there was something I could say to make it better, but I had nothing.

"Hey, come here." I opened my arms for a hug. He held out for a bit, but then came over to the bed and sat next to me and let me hug him.

"I know it doesn't make anything better Edward, but I believe in you and I believe you're going to solve this. I mean it. I know it has to be a lot, to have those parents that you don't want to disappoint. But David has the best possible team in his corner right now. Not just because you're good at your job, but because of how much you care."

"I just don't want to fail him, Bella. And I'm glad this woman thought the little boy looked okay but what if it's not David? What if that little boy is alive somewhere and terrified and hurt and missing his parents and wondering why nobody is coming for him? What if…" He was doing his best to hold his composure but I heard the tremor in his voice and I realized how scared he was on David's behalf. I leaned closer, resting my head on his shoulder.

"Then it's important that he has people here who care so much about him, Edward. That's why he's so lucky that he has a man like you looking out for him. I know his family must be scared, and I know it's a lot of pressure. There's no pressure here, not from me." He finally relaxed a bit, leaned into my touch, and I felt myself relaxing too. Then he spoke.

"I love you, Bella."

And I shut down. That's the best way of describing it. I got so still that he turned in my arms so that he could look at me. I have no idea what I must've looked like. But he grabbed my arms and made me let go of him, and held my hands in his.

"Did I freak you out?" He smiled apologetically. I blinked.

"Can you say something, Bella, you're freaking me out a little." He tried to laugh, keep it light. Instantly I felt hit with a wall of shame.

"I'm sorry!" I said, but I had no idea what I was apologizing for. I couldn't think right, and I sounded hysterical.

"Bella, are you, are you okay?"

"I don't…know. That was…Edward I…" The plan was to say it back. But I couldn't. I physically felt like I couldn't. Edward rubbed my hands with his thumbs and leaned in until I was looking him in the eyes.

"Bella, when was the last time you talked to Kate?"

"I don't, I'm not sure." With the filming picking up, I had been making fewer appointments. I remembered her sending me an email telling me it'd been a while but her door was always open to me, but I couldn't remember when she'd send it.

"Maybe this is something to talk about." Edward didn't say it meanly, not even with a little edge. He sounded truly concerned, which made me feel worse.

"Edward I'm so, sorry."

"Bella I meant it, I love you, I don't need you to say it back to make me feel better. Finally saying it to you out loud is enough for me right now. I love you, and one day you'll be able to say it. Please don't force it Bella, when it's time you'll know." He smiled at me, a genuine smile, and even though I felt like I was going to tear up I smiled too. Then he leaned over for a quick kiss, before standing up again.

"I've got to go in now and take care of this tip with Masen." He said, before heading into his closet to get ready. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my Saturday, but I knew I had time to wait and watch him. When he was all set to go, I walked him to the door. Right before he walked out he pulled me in, gave me another slow kiss, and then disappeared out the door with another casual "I love you." It felt both amazing, and atrocious.


End file.
